Anyone else spending valentines day alone?

[needimprovement250]

You know there are allot of reasons you have erection issues that has nothing to do with porn. If you don't feel comfortable with a lady, the chemistry may feel off, if you feel insecure about your life circumstances, if you have blood circulation issues, then you'll have a problem. Since you are not meeting women in the first place and your opinions are formed by the precious few women you have met in the past, then perhaps I can suggest your issues are performance anxiety, scarcity mindset, bad chemistry with the woman in question, and just plain nerves. They also have herbals to take care of these issues as a stop-gap and I've used them and I'd recommend them.

Yeah I know those can happen as well, it might actually be a mixture of both for me. Years of nothing but porn and masturbation has definitely taken its toll on me and I do feel like I've become psychologically conditioned to only be aroused by and achieve an erection from that. But I also had no chemistry at all with the girl that I lost my virginity to, we went to a waterfront amusement park for our date and she stayed silent for the whole time we were there, I tried to talk to her but every convo attempt would just fizzle out. Then after we left, she didn't want to go home yet and instead wanted to go to this lookout point nearby and she climbed into the backseat of my car when we got there. But we weren't alone in the parking lot and other cars had their headlights on and pointed at my car, so the people in the other cars could see what we were doing and that probably contributed to it as well as the fact that we had to do it in a public place. Then the second time that never got past oral, that was a thing where my friend wanted to watch people have sex in front of him. So after I was already very drunk and had lowered inhibitions, he invited over a girl who he knew from a previous job to have sex with me so that he could watch. It was very awkward even when I was drunk to be fooling around with a girl while this guy who I've known for years is sitting there staring at us. I probably couldn't get it up because of that and also because of the alcohol I'm sure, in addition to the fact that me and that girl didn't even interact with each other at all before we got to it. It was pretty much went like "ok she's here now so just take your clothes off and get to it" and when I had my fingers in her, she started bleeding and bled all over my hand. That's where it ended and she put her clothes back on and left. So it could also be an issue of bad circumstances for sex and maybe being somewhere with a girl that's completely private and a totally relaxed environment would make a difference. I have heard of some herbals being useful for that and I refuse to take Viagra because of the bad side effects, so I would try the herbals. What ones are the best? The only one I know of for that is horny goat weed.

 

[corrector]

That's actually a good point. For the longest time, I've thought that I need to have X Y and Z (my own place, a big social circle, and a career) in order to even be eligible to date a woman. But from what you're telling me, that doesn't have to be the case because if there's enough chemistry, they will be willing to look past where you're currently at in your life. At my last regular job, I actually worked with a few guys who were still pulling women even though they all lived in a car together and they would also motel hop whenever they had the money to do that. I kind of had a job like what you're describing from 2020-2021 but it was during the height of the pandemic and all of the social distancing stuff that they made us do made interacting with any women that worked there more difficult than it otherwise would've been.

I think you were the one on here who told me about moving out while my parents are still in good health awhile back and I do agree with that. Because if their health does start to deteriorate while I'm still living here, I'm pretty much gonna be obligated to keep living here to take care of them since they've let me live in their house rent free this whole time. That's not saying that I would turn my back on them if anything like that happened, but that it would be so much worse if I'm still living with them once that would start to happen and there's way less of a possibility to meet women when you have to be a caretaker for your parents. Also in the case of my parents, they already are pretty clingy and hover over me a lot right now. Most of the time, I can't put on my shoes or grab my keys without them asking where I'm going and what I'll be doing and if I slip out of the house without them noticing, they usually call or text to see what I went out to do. I also can't be in my room or out in the backyard for more than 10 minutes before they come to see what I'm doing. And if I'm on my phone or computer, my mom will also deliberately walk behind me while I'm seated too look at my screen and see what I'm looking at on my computer or phone. She was also trying to push me to share my phone's location with her so that she can see where I am at any given time, something I have refused to do. This has made living at home extremely annoying for me and this behavior will probably only get worse as they get older.

Here's the link to that coach's site. He actually does have a lot of free material on YouTube since he has his own channel on there as well, working with him just means signing up for 1 on 1 sessions with him. For all new clients, he does a 1 hour session with them for free so at the very least, I feel like I should do the free 1 hour session since I have nothing to lose by doing that and I can see wether or not this guy really could help me or not without having to invest any money. Also, I wouldn't buy one of his coaching packages if I wanted to keep working with him. I would do the pay as you go option.
https://www.franktalks.com/

Wait. How do you look at porn if you have no privacy? Wouldnt mom be aware of what you are up to? If you become a caretaker to them, plus you are older (ie balding, etc...) and have no experience then you would feel really feel screwed. What is your parents religion? You have to try to meet girls while you still can because your situation will just get worst over time like mine. Rather then worry if you qualify, worry you may lose whatever opportunity and space you have now and regret not doing anything at all.

 

[needimprovement250]

Wait. How do you look at porn if you have no privacy? Wouldnt mom be aware of what you are up to? If you become a caretaker to them, plus you are older (ie balding, etc...) and have no experience then you would feel really feel screwed. What is your parents religion? You have to try to meet girls while you still can because your situation will just get worst over time like mine. Rather then worry if you qualify, worry you may lose whatever opportunity and space you have now and regret not doing anything at all.

I look at porn after they go to bed and their room is upstairs from mine, so i have the privacy to look at it after they're asleep. Yeah I would feel totally screwed in that situation and would probably just have to resign myself to only paying for escorts for the rest of my life. Catholic technically, but they never go to church or abide by the rules of religion. Good point because it already now feels worse going into 30 than it did when I was 19 going into 20. If this keeps going and nothing has changed by the time I'm 39 going into 40, its gonna be a million times worse than any of the other milestones I've reached so far.

 

[corrector]

I look at porn after they go to bed and their room is upstairs from mine, so i have the privacy to look at it after they're asleep. Yeah I would feel totally screwed in that situation and would probably just have to resign myself to only paying for escorts.

You never been with an escort once. How do you know you would like that enough that it is a last resort? It did not work that way for me. Its no longer a last resort in my books because there are nasty spiritual dynamics. Dont underestimate the guilt and jarring aspect of it. Its better to sub an escort over OF because the spiritual stuff is locked on the screen so it cant bother you.

 

[AureliusMaximus]

we both hated that day so much.

Why do you care?
Its girl thing/day and no of my guy friends or myself for that matter gives a flying phuck about these female days.

 

[SW15]

Go to a strip joint instead.

Not a bad idea honestly, if I had an extra couple hundred to blow tonight I probably would.

I can imagine plenty of men going to strip clubs on Valentine's Day. A loner male would be more likely to do that than a male with friends. Most unattached men's friends are going to be with girlfriends or wives on Valentine's Day.

The same story would be true for breastaurants. I can't imagine a lot of groups of even 2-3 men going to a breastaurant on Valentine's Day.

I have heard that gyms on Valentine's Day after 4 PM are total sausage fests.

 

[Mike32ct]

I can imagine plenty of men going to strip clubs on Valentine's Day. A loner male would be more likely to do that than a male with friends. Most unattached men's friends are going to be with girlfriends or wives on Valentine's Day.

The same story would be true for breastaurants. I can't imagine a lot of groups of even 2-3 men going to a breastaurant on Valentine's Day.

I have heard that gyms on Valentine's Day after 4 PM are total sausage fests.

That’s what really sucks about V-Day alone. You can’t even call/text most family and friends after say early afternoon because they’re “busy” lol.

I heard Xmas is also big at strip clubs. It brings out lonely single guys and/or older guys with no family left.

 

[needimprovement250]

Is that the "dating coach"? He looks obese to be honest, idk man but a guy who can't even control his own weight, the only thing we have control in life, doesn't seem respectable in my view.

The guy is obese. I wouldn't trust a guy who can't even control his own weight, to be giving me advice about dating or $exuality like he has all those certifications listed in his webpage

Those pics are actually old, he has since lost a lot of that weight. These are current pics of him from his Facebook page, which is viewable to the public.

 

[needimprovement250]

Why do you care?
Its girl thing/day and no of my guy friends or myself for that matter gives a flying phuck about these female days.

Me and my friend always cared because every single Valentine’s Day of our lives was spent alone, but he moved to a different state and he’s married now.

 

[needimprovement250]

You never been with an escort once. How do you know you would like that enough that it is a last resort? It did not work that way for me. Its no longer a last resort in my books because there are nasty spiritual dynamics. Dont underestimate the guilt and jarring aspect of it. Its better to sub an escort over OF because the spiritual stuff is locked on the screen so it cant bother you.

I don’t know that I would, but like you said if that scenario of having to be my parents’ caretaker played out while I was still inexperienced, then I’m really screwed and escorts are probably my only option. OnlyFans is no different than looking at porn, which I’ve been doing for years. At least with an escort I would actually be having sex.

 

[SW15]

I heard Xmas is also big at strip clubs. It brings out lonely single guys and/or older guys with no family left.

I had never heard that. It makes sense.

That’s what really sucks about V-Day alone. You can’t even call/text most family and friends after say early afternoon because they’re “busy” lol.

With Valentine's Day alone, unattached men need to find other unattached men or unattached older family members.

If alone, men have the following options....

• Gym
• Strip club
• Home
• Attempt to do some lone wolf nightlife pickup

 

[corrector]

I don’t know that I would, but like you said if that scenario of having to be my parents’ caretaker played out while I was still inexperienced, then I’m really screwed and escorts are probably my only option. OnlyFans is no different than looking at porn, which I’ve been doing for years. At least with an escort I would actually be having sex.

What I'm trying to say is that you don't know that because you have never been with one. This is one aspect I would say that I procrastinated like crazy. (ie if I was thinking of seeing an escort since 1997, then I eventually did see one in Dec 4 & 5, 2014, that's 17 years of thinking that this is a great last resort before that balloon was popped that this is definitely not a "last resort" concept. The precipitating event that caused it was a law coming into effect making it illegal the next day.

The point is that access to money to use an escort is not a motivating factor or issue to visit an escort otherwise I would have either done that allot sooner rather than wait 17 years. You say you have zero money saved up yet you want to use a dating coach. As you proscrastinate using an escort what do you think will happen (and probably has already happen)? First of all, you won't be able to get it up.
You'll need herbals/Viagara even dealing with them. When it's later in life and you are your parent's caretaker, how realistic do you think that would sound that you are escaping there to visit an escort and then come back to resume being a caretaker? Your mother is definitely going to be on your case then, and even worst than she is today. When you become a caretaker, it's like you feel more responsible and love for your parents and it would just feel wrong to do something like that.

All I can say, is like you, I've always painted a picture that it's easy to visit escorts, and this is a last resort, yadda, yadda, etc... but you won't know if it's really for your or not until you have tried it once. The take home, if any is that you don't really know if this is for your or not, and/or if in a worsening set-up at home, if there will even be breathing space to even do that if you are not really able to do that now, and if so, why have you waited this long to visit one and why are you planning on waiting until things are so unbearable at home that you'd start that then?

 

[MatureDJ]

I can imagine plenty of men going to strip clubs on Valentine's Day. A loner male would be more likely to do that than a male with friends. Most unattached men's friends are going to be with girlfriends or wives on Valentine's Day.

The same story would be true for breastaurants. I can't imagine a lot of groups of even 2-3 men going to a breastaurant on Valentine's Day.

Brestaurants are just soft-core strip joints.

 

[HaleyBaron]

Those pics are actually old, he has since lost a lot of that weight. These are current pics of him from his Facebook page, which is viewable to the public.

To be honest, he's still f*cked in the looks department. That leftover fat isn't help around the midsection and he's not aging well.

 

[needimprovement250]

To be honest, he's still f*cked in the looks department. That leftover fat isn't help around the midsection and he's not aging well.

At least he lost the weight though, he has weight loss goals and he’s made a lot of progress towards them. Like I said, I don’t see any harm in doing the free 1 hour session just to see if working with him would be helpful before deciding wether or not to spend money to hire him on and have additional sessions with him.

 

[SW15]

Brestaurants are just soft-core strip joints.

The biggest difference between breastaurants and strip clubs is what you're paying for. At breastaurants, you're paying for meals and alcoholic drinks. At strip clubs, you're paying for stage dances, private dances, and alcoholic drinks.

At a breastaurant, it is more likely that you will be able to have a meaningful conversation with a male friend or 2+ male friends than at a strip club. There is some value in the ability to chat with your friends.

There are men who do business lunches with other men at breastaurants, which also would not happen at a strip club.

 

[BMX]

I was alone on 2/14/23 and it was real peaceful. I caught my return flight from Tallahassee to Charlotte and then drove a long distance after. It's been two years since I last traveled this frequently. It was missed for sure and a little eye-opening.