Is the juice worth the squeeze?!

[alvinkels]

There is this girl, I have known her over 5 years. She had guy when I met even though we make out every now and then whilst she was in relationship. When she broke up I wanted to get into relationship with her but she said she is going through a lot and she not ready for relationship. I respected that and pulled back. But she still flirt with me every now and then. Until we went home for vacation she barely contacted me; like twice, one for some workout gifs I sent and her and other to return some money she took. When we resumed she reached out. I didn't want to have anything to do with her because clearly I knew it was not going anywhere. But when she reached out I decided to respect myself and returned the call I clearly knew she was calling because of something. She needed me to help her out with a project at school. I wanted to say no but it looks no one can what I do and she had someone helped her it went terribly. We had lunch that went to her place we made out and I left. The following day i returned to help her with her laptop issue. Then a flirtatious message from a guy she claim "her son" came in. I opened the chat and I was greeted with series of flirts mostly from her. I was disappointed and hurted. I couldn't believe my eyes. I did what I came to do and I left. I didn't hug didn't even touch her in anyway; I just walked away calming myself.

I gave it thought and decided to do FWB and just another plate. But is she worth it?! .
And also I need help as to whether to continue assist her in her project because I feel disappointed I couldn't imagine she could lie to me and why she would do that. What is the masculine thing to do? continue with the commitment because I gave my word or just give an excuse for a work assignment and walk away because of the betrayal. I can't give boyfriend benefits to a friend who can't even be truthful. I intended if I should help I will just keep things very casual no flirting back.
And I haven't spoken to her about what I saw because clearly she was into it and more over she is not my girl so she clearly owe me no explanation neither do I owe her any query.

 

[ThisIsSparta]

That women held you as beta-orbiter for over 5 years, made out with you a few times and made otherwise use of your skills to get her along.

No woman worth the squeeze makes out with you more then one time until she decides to fvck you or not... unless you both are school-kids.
In any case you failed to escalate early on.

FWB/giving her plate status is out of the question as you are not someone she wants to fvck but a beta-orbiter that comes in handy from time to time while she keeps spinning her other plates.

I guess she friendzoned you early on and once you are in the zone, its usually a **** load of work to get out even for an experienced guy.

Forget that girl, learn from your mistakes, find a woman that hasnt put you into the friendzone yet and act accordingly.

 

[CyrusTheGreat]

Most likely, you will never receive intimacy from this woman. Just drop her as if she never existed. Move on to bigger better things brother. Basically what @ThisIsSparta said.

 

[SW15]

In this situation, @alvinkels need to cease all contact with this woman.

In general, the juice is worth the squeeze. There's a need in life to have sex. The choices are having sex or not having sex or being a MGTOW monk/incel.

 

[The Duke]

@alvinkels this girl has used you. She has no intention of having anything more with you. She feeds you a few nuts to keep you doing things for her. She has no respect for you.

 

[lgbs2004]

If you gonna do errands for chicks, at least ask for a blowj0b in exchange, not a kiss on the lips!

Why the hell would you want to date a girl who cheated on her boyfriend with you? What stops her from cheating on you too?

Either way, this situation cannot end well for you, forget this b1tch!

 

[DonJuanjr]

I'd say something like "Unfortunately I can't continue helping you. I need to focus on my needs."

 

[BackInTheGame78]

You should walk away and learn to respect yourself. This woman is only interested in using you for when she needs help with something(a common strategy of women...to keep guys with different skill sets in orbit so they can get help for free whenever something goes wrong) and gives you scraps from the table to keep you in place while other guys get the full buffet for free.

There is nothing to squeeze here. This girl is playing you for a fool.

 

[Gamisch]

That women held you as beta-orbiter for over 5 years, made out with you a few times and made otherwise use of your skills to get her along.

No woman worth the squeeze makes out with you more then one time until she decides to fvck you or not... unless you both are school-kids.
In any case you failed to escalate early on.

FWB/giving her plate status is out of the question as you are not someone she wants to fvck but a beta-orbiter that comes in handy from time to time while she keeps spinning her other plates.

I guess she friendzoned you early on and once you are in the zone, its usually a **** load of work to get out even for an experienced guy.

Forget that girl, learn from your mistakes, find a woman that hasnt put you into the friendzone yet and act accordingly.

5 freaking years. OP is lost. And I dont say that to humiliate him.

I don't know his age , but if it's anywhere around 30 it sounds like THIS is the "love of his life". Or at least the woman that brought him what's closest to love and imprinted him

There are many principle things that went wrong, e.g trying to seriously date a woman who cheated with you on somebody else. But we are way passed the stage of having principles. A total reset is needed, and with that a thoroughly detailed look at his other options ect. Because the only reason such a woman can pull this off is when a man doesn't have other prospects.

 

[jaymbrs]

This is cringey.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Welcome. Sorry to hear. Bookofpook.com

 

[lgbs2004]

The THIRST is REAL!!!!!

 

[alvinkels]

Thank you all @ThisIsSparta @CyrusTheGreat @SW15 @Howiestern @lgbs2004 @DonJuanjr @BackInTheGame78 @Gamisch @jaymbrs @Divorced w 3 @ This what I needed

 

[Divorced w 3]

Thank you all @ThisIsSparta @CyrusTheGreat @SW15 @Howiestern @lgbs2004 @DonJuanjr @BackInTheGame78 @Gamisch @jaymbrs @Divorced w 3 @ This what I needed

Keep coming buddy

 

[LTG71]

You should walk away and learn to respect yourself. This woman is only interested in using you for when she needs help with something(a common strategy of women...to keep guys with different skill sets in orbit so they can get help for free whenever something goes wrong) and gives you scraps from the table to keep you in place while other guys get the full buffet for free.

There is nothing to squeeze here. This girl is playing you for a fool.

Women decide rather quickly if sex is a going to happen. Once the answer is no, they have no problem playing a guy to extract any possible resources. This is what most women think of as “friendship” with men. Since no sex is going to be exchanged, you are placed in the roll of service provider. At the same time, you are not going to get much reciprocation since male-female friendship styles are different.

I have a coworker like this and I basically pulled the plug on making any effort with her. I can see her losing her sh!t now as I cut her off. She makes 100% of the effort. We’re not fvcking and I can’t count on her for anything so what’s the point? This is very much a blind spot for women. They say men use women for sex but they disproportionately use men for free resources. Once you see this dynamic starting, remove yourself from the situation.

 

[alvinkels]

Women decide rather quickly if sex is a going to happen. Once the answer is no, they have no problem playing a guy to extract any possible resources. This is what most women think of as “friendship” with men. Since no sex is going to be exchanged, you are placed in the roll of service provider. At the same time, you are not going to get much reciprocation since male-female friendship styles are different.

I have a coworker like this and I basically pulled the plug on making any effort with her. I can see her losing her sh!t now as I cut her off. She makes 100% of the effort. We’re not fvcking and I can’t count on her for anything so what’s the point? This is very much a blind spot for women. They say men use women for sex but they disproportionately use men for free resources. Once you see this dynamic starting, remove yourself from the situation.

Thanks my brother I can feel you... I am going to do just and i don't care what she thinks of me. It will be hurtful for me but I need this surgery to cut her off no matter the consequences I am ready for it.

 

[Gamisch]

Thanks my brother I can feel you... I am going to do just and i don't care what she thinks of me. It will be hurtful for me but I need this surgery to cut her off no matter the consequences I am ready for it.

What's the consequence you are afraid off? That you wont get her " warm WhatsApp messages " anymore? I am 99% sure that 99% of men in these situations spend 99% of the time with her while they should and could be doing other shyte. Chores, gym making money, homies ,family hobbies ,OFCOURSE pulling other more cooperative women. Women will punish you for being a bytch, and be glad they do. This is how you learn.

Little in between how to get out of the friendzone tip: tell her you are suddenly busy with manly shyte that improves your life. " oh was busy painting my house/fixing my car . Oh was having a drink with xxx. Oh was at a party with my homie." Ect ect. Translation = I don't have time for this highschool shyte anymore bytch!

If anything, you walking away might actually increase your chance to feck her one day. She will either drop you like a bag of poop, or get clingy and beg for your validation. If it's the first, you know what your position was all along. If it's the latter, you must report back and make nothing but good moves to make her drop those panties.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

OP,

just remember, she probably has other guys that she does this with several actually. The consequence of you cutting her off is that you’ll get your balls back and take pride in not being one of those guys that she uses.

Stay strong brother.

 

[LTG71]

Exactly. This is the female version of spinning plates. Engaging a collection of guys to extract attention, validation and resources as she selects who she’s going to have s@x with.

She needed you to fix her computer so she could continue messaging another guy… let that sink in a little bit.

This is the kind of sh!t they need to teach boys early in school. Women are not all innocent and helpless. They can be quite manipulative and cruel without an ounce of remorse. Reason why this red pill community exist, it’s a wake up call.

This woman I know says sh!t like, “I‘m not a hugger, I don’t like taking pictures, I don’t like running”. Then later on FB, you see a post of her running with a guy, full embrace, taking a selfie on a trail. Yup, she just doesn’t want to do those things with everybody, but with certain guys she’s all in. This sh!t stings but you gotta except reality and move on. Once you get emotionally attached to some fantasy, you‘ll only torture yourself thinking this women feels the same way about you. Then you open her computer and find those chats. Sorry bro, take it as a learning experience.

 

[bat soup]

In this case I don't think there is any juice left. Those melons have been squeezed by a lot of guys already and they squeezed them HARD.