Women’s baiting

[anonymous12345]

I’ve experienced a pattern twice:

• Her: “Are you gonna workout today?” I take it as a hint, says “Yeah, let’s work out together.” She: “Well, I’m dating someone right now.”
• Her, added me on Facebook: “Is there no room for me in your life?” Me later on: “Let's chat this evening.” Then she leaves me on read through notifications. Lol.

Well played, girls. They basically hook a man for some kind of potential plan, and then back away. Maybe they do that forever (mental notch count), or until it suits them. They steered the interaction and set the agenda.

The question is how to deal with this.

I was too easy catch in the above examples. So the solution is to be the opposite of that, be aware of this snake play. Suggestions on practicalities welcome.

 

[Dr.Suave]

Most women are addicted toattention and validation. Dont think much of it and move on to the next girl.

 

[f(x)]

What I have noticed in my experience with high interest women is that I was usually too busy to reply or just wasn’t interested in responding. They would continue messaging me until I engaged them in conversation and made plans to get together.

The fact that they were interested but I was too busy/indifferent to respond was probably coincidental. Invariably, my ego would take over and I would get too attached, at which point they quickly started losing interest.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I’ve experienced a pattern twice:

• Her: “Are you gonna workout today?” I take it as a hint, says “Yeah, let’s work out together.” She: “Well, I’m dating someone right now.”
• Her, added me on Facebook: “Is there no room for me in your life?” Me later on: “Let's chat this evening.” Then she leaves me on read through notifications. Lol.

Well played, girls. They basically hook a man for some kind of potential plan, and then back away. Maybe they do that forever (mental notch count), or until it suits them. They steered the interaction and set the agenda.

The question is how to deal with this.

I was too easy catch in the above examples. So the solution is to be the opposite of that, be aware of this snake play. Suggestions on practicalities welcome.

You showed you were thirsty.

 

[anonymous12345]

You showed you were thirsty.

Oops.

 

[anonymous12345]

In both cases she gave you the opportunity to frame her as the chaser.

How would you frame her as the chaser?

 

[BillyPilgrim]

How would you frame her as the chaser?

Don't verbally assume the sale. Off the top of my head, to girl 1 say "maybe, do you wanna watch" or to girl 2 say "maybe. there's no room on my lap though."

Prob not exactly what I would say but you get the idea. Be aloof and playful. If it feels in any way that you're responding as if you'd respond to your dude friends, then stop and reconsider the text.

 

[Plinco]

I’ve experienced a pattern twice:

• Her: “Are you gonna workout today?” I take it as a hint, says “Yeah, let’s work out together.” She: “Well, I’m dating someone right now.”
• Her, added me on Facebook: “Is there no room for me in your life?” Me later on: “Let's chat this evening.” Then she leaves me on read through notifications. Lol.

Well played, girls. They basically hook a man for some kind of potential plan, and then back away. Maybe they do that forever (mental notch count), or until it suits them. They steered the interaction and set the agenda.

The question is how to deal with this.

I was too easy catch in the above examples. So the solution is to be the opposite of that, be aware of this snake play. Suggestions on practicalities welcome.

These are two examples of her baiting you into her frame.

 

[DreamAgain]

I’ve experienced a pattern twice:

• Her: “Are you gonna workout today?” I take it as a hint, says “Yeah, let’s work out together.” She: “Well, I’m dating someone right now.”
• Her, added me on Facebook: “Is there no room for me in your life?” Me later on: “Let's chat this evening.” Then she leaves me on read through notifications. Lol.

Well played, girls. They basically hook a man for some kind of potential plan, and then back away. Maybe they do that forever (mental notch count), or until it suits them. They steered the interaction and set the agenda.

The question is how to deal with this.

I was too easy catch in the above examples. So the solution is to be the opposite of that, be aware of this snake play. Suggestions on practicalities welcome.

You did nothing wrong, you deal with it this way:
a) treat her as a platonic friend
b) go no contact, or make up and excuse when she messages you that you're busy with xyz and will get back to her, and never get back to her.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

You did nothing wrong, you deal with it this way:
a) treat her as a platonic friend
b) go no contact, or make up and excuse when she messages you that you're busy with xyz and will get back to her, and never get back to her.

He did do something wrong.

These are little insidious ways women see how desperate a guy is for their attention.

 

[DreamAgain]

He did do something wrong.

These are little insidious ways women see how desperate a guy is for their attention.

He responded to a message, tried twice to see if she was bluffing, I see no harm in that.

Anything further from here would be a mistake and he should cease contact.

 

[patb]

Most women are addicted toattention and validation. Dont think much of it and move on to the next girl.

Imagine the horror the Bad Old Beforetimes, they were married by their early twenties to a narrowly circumscribed set of partners. They wouldn't be free to spend their prime years teasing an endless string of simps, causing discord and generally squandering the higher potential of a generation of men. Truly unenlightened times. Thankfully things are much better today, when we can devote ourselves to the truly higher cause of being the most pleasing circus attraction.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

He responded to a message, tried twice to see if she was bluffing, I see no harm in that.

Anything further from here would be a mistake and he should cease contact.

He went for the Charlie Brown.

Lucy puts the football down, Charlie Brown runs to kick it and then Lucy pulls it away at the last second and Charlie falls flat on his back.

The right move would have been to answer whatever way he wanted with no mention of doing something with her. If she wanted to do something with him she would make it known afterwards.

It comes down to who is going to put their cards on their table first. OP not only put them down, he ran around the table and held them up in front of her face so she could get a good look at them.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

You showed you were thirsty.

In my experience, when a woman gives you an opening and you pass on it, they interpret it as an insult and lose interest. There is probably some middle ground way of handling this, might also just depend on the girl.

 

[Bokanovsky]

It comes down to who is going to put their cards on their table first. OP not only put them down, he ran around the table and held them up in front of her face so she could get a good look at them.

I used to think this way too (a long time ago). As I gained more life experience, I realized that treating interactions with women as a card game is emotionally draining and ultimately counterproductive (unless you are a master manipulator, which 99% of men are not and will never be). If a woman is genuinely interested, she will respond positively to a simple, direct approach. If she's playing games, it means that she has low interest and/or a personality disorder. On to the next one.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I used to think this way too (a long time ago). As I gained more life experience, I realized that treating interactions with women as a card game is emotionally draining and ultimately counterproductive (unless you are a master manipulator, which 99% of men are not and will never be). If a woman is genuinely interested, she will respond positively to a simple, direct approach. If she's playing games, it means that she has low interest and/or a personality disorder. On to the next one.

Time and place. Wrong time, wrong place.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

read anti dump. What he did was 100% correct and saved a lot of time.

Nah, not if he actually wanted the chance to fvck them it wasn't.

 

[pranshu]

In my experience, when a woman gives you an opening and you pass on it, they interpret it as an insult and lose interest. There is probably some middle ground way of handling this, might also just depend on the girl.

How about saying, " I m gonna do XYZ at X o'clock" and depending on her response, if its enthusiastic, you say,"you can come along if you want, but don't be too ( whatever qualifier)..
this way you bait her back to your frame..

 

[BackInTheGame78]

She had a boyfriend...you think he should have wasted time gaming her?

I'm just making recommendations based on what OP wanted.

 

[anonymous12345]

He went for the Charlie Brown.

Lucy puts the football down, Charlie Brown runs to kick it and then Lucy pulls it away at the last second and Charlie falls flat on his back.

The right move would have been to answer whatever way he wanted with no mention of doing something with her. If she wanted to do something with him she would make it known afterwards.

It comes down to who is going to put their cards on their table first. OP not only put them down, he ran around the table and held them up in front of her face so she could get a good look at them.

I agree on this analysis. The stereotype, new for me as non-American, is good to know:

Charlie Brown - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org