When a chick says she "needs a break", is she really saying "I'd like to see if I can upgrade from you", but if not, I'll start sexing you again?

[MatureDJ]

A recent post from bobafatt got me thinking about this.

An alternative of this would be "if I become a land-whale, I know I won't be able to upgrade, so I'll let you back into my golden vajaya".

my opinion: It's like she's saying that you are being downgraded to the orbiter minor-leagues, and that you don't have any options.

 

[Fortune_favors_the_bold]

In my experience when they ask for space you either screw up so bad that they wanna try to get rid of you regardless or they have a better deal around and they want to make sure it works while keeping you as a plan B.

Either case an interested woman that has respect and attraction toward you would never feel the need for such nor would accept such request from you.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

She might be saying 30 words is too long for a headline.

 

[Serenity]

So far I haven't seen this a lot, but a good friend of me was in this situation a few years ago. His girlfriend "needed a break" after 10 years and owning a house together. My wife was friends with his girlfriend, so I got good intel on what she was doing on her "break". My friend was willing to work through it, his girlfriend on the other hand just ran off, lived with her parents and almost immediately started seeing some other dude.

My friend was ignored for several weeks, he tried to talk to her, but she just ignored him. He stopped eating, thought about it all the time and at one point fainted at work due to the stress, shortly after that I had to man to man conversation with him. I told him there's no such thing as a "break", it's incredibly disrespectful and immature to not be willing to resolve the issues or AT LEAST just break up. She was keeping him as a backup while branch swinging, I told him this.

He quickly saw reason after our talk, stopped trying and just declared it over. THEN she reached out bombarding him with messages, but it was too late, she could fvck off for all he cared. There was no way back even if she wanted to and she was locked in with the other guy, they're still together, but I've met him and he's dumb as a brick so I wouldn't call it an upgrade...

 

[MatureDJ]

So far I haven't seen this a lot, but a good friend of me was in this situation a few years ago. His girlfriend "needed a break" after 10 years and owning a house together. My wife was friends with his girlfriend, so I got good intel on what she was doing on her "break". My friend was willing to work through it, his girlfriend on the other hand just ran off, lived with her parents and almost immediately started seeing some other dude.

My friend was ignored for several weeks, he tried to talk to her, but she just ignored him. He stopped eating, thought about it all the time and at one point fainted at work due to the stress, shortly after that I had to man to man conversation with him. I told him there's no such thing as a "break", it's incredibly disrespectful and immature to not be willing to resolve the issues or AT LEAST just break up. She was keeping him as a backup while branch swinging, I told him this.

He quickly saw reason after our talk, stopped trying and just declared it over. THEN she reached out bombarding him with messages, but it was too late, she could fvck off for all he cared. There was no way back even if she wanted to and she was locked in with the other guy, they're still together, but I've met him and he's dumb as a brick so I wouldn't call it an upgrade...

One of the key events in the emotional development of a man is to understand that a woman can change her interest in him at the flick of a wrist; that said, in the old days, it used to be that once she got wifed up, or at least has had his kids, etc., she would be safe, but we are now in the End Times of Western Civilization.

 

[Serenity]

One of the key events in the emotional development of a man is to understand that a woman can change her interest in him at the flick of a wrist; that said, in the old days, it used to be that once she got wifed up, or at least has had his kids, etc., she would be safe, but we are now in the End Times of Western Civilization.

I disagree with that. I disliked her long before it ended, the signs were really subtle, but I never envisioned this to last. Why did I not save my friend before that time? This was also subtle, but I knew he wouldn't be receptive to my ideas and there would be no purpose other than to stir up drama leading to nothing. It probably was perceived as a "flick of the wrist" to him, but my perception was that of a slow ticking time bomb for several years.

My point is that these things are perceptible, but it requires a critical mind and a certain discipline to let rationality come before emotions. A woman just inexplicably turning only tells me I don't understand enough. The signs are always there, but often they're too subtle to be picked up by most dudes. Every story I've read about failed relationships on here leaves at least some hint about the early warning signs, stuff they just didn't take seriously enough and followed up on. It sticks out just enough to be remembered and retold, but not enough for them to do anything about at that time.

The signs are always there staring us in the face, but many men fail to do something about it out of either ignorance or denial.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

If a woman you care about "needs space" its curtains already. That said if you're going to allow it to occur, you need to get a tight definition of what "sauce" means to HER. Does it mean she wants to see other men (and all that entails) or does it mean she wants to be alone, to think about the relationship? PRESS FOR THIS DEFINITION.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

largely depends on if this "Needs a Break" happened from you cheating, fvcking something up, or something similar. Now, this case is potentially salvageable. Otherwise, you are screwed, call it quits.

 

[manfrombelow]

In most cases, it's always a very bad sign a girl proposes the need to "have a break" from you (and your relationship). It only means she's planning her way out, whether or not she's having a new guy doesn't matter. While it's common for women to have already had a guy lined up before she dumps you, it's not so uncommon for them to still dump you without having anyone else.

Here comes the solution: When a girl wants a break, you simply give it to her by saying yes and accept that from that moment on, she's history.

 

[SargeMaximus]

My ex did this. I left right away and she texted me immediately asking why I didn’t “fight for us”. I should have set my terms at that point but I went the beta route and tried to “make it work”.
Only good part of that is it is cemented in my brain to NEVER do that again.

 

[SgtSplacker]

Any kind of break is an immediate call for a breakup. She's obviously not there emotionally. Women almost always impose on a mans resources in some way. If she's not 1000% on board, i'm out and not wasting time and resources on her again.

 

[The Duke]

When a woman wants a break you tell her she can have it and you are done. Been there more than once, tried it, learned my lesson.

It's really no different than trying to get one out for a first date.

An interested woman wants to be with you. She isn't going to throw up road blocks.

 

[Alvafe]

if a woman ask for a time, just say "who gives time is a clock" and end it, then see her beg, cry and ask to stay, just understand its over, end it and find another.

woman do this because they are wondering if they can get another, who she considers better, just move on and don't wait as a backup

 

[corsica]

You said everything in the title. Most women won't leave a relationship if something else is not on the line.

If she wants to break up as a sh!t test, say OK and be indifferent. If she is interested in something "better" don't play the fool and leave.

 

[Hal9000]

Taking a break means they already have someone else lined up and they want to try them out before completely severing ties with you. This allows them to do whatever they want, guilt free, and then still be able to come back to any guy dumb enough to not know what's going on. Win/win for them.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

It means she has lost interest and/or respect for you and will only come back if she doesn't find anything else.

 

[MatureDJ]

In most cases, it's always a very bad sign a girl proposes the need to "have a break" from you (and your relationship). It only means she's planning her way out, whether or not she's having a new guy doesn't matter. While it's common for women to have already had a guy lined up before she dumps you, it's not so uncommon for them to still dump you without having anyone else.

Here comes the solution: When a girl wants a break, you simply give it to her by saying yes and accept that from that moment on, she's history.

I pretty much did when a gal did that to me. Interestingly, we had a one-and-out hookup about 6 months later.

 

[manfrombelow]

I pretty much did when a gal did that to me. Interestingly, we had a one-and-out hookup about 6 months later.

Fleel free to elaborate my man.

 

[MatureDJ]

Fleel free to elaborate my man.

She lived about 80 miles away, and had a wedding in my town (I wasn't invited to the wedding as her date ), and the hookup was the night before, so it wasn't like she was bumming a stay out of me. She didn't make any statements about starting to see each other regularly, and I certainly didn't ask.

 

[Gamisch]

If a woman you care about "needs space" its curtains already. That said if you're going to allow it to occur, you need to get a tight definition of what "sauce" means to HER. Does it mean she wants to see other men (and all that entails) or does it mean she wants to be alone, to think about the relationship? PRESS FOR THIS DEFINITION.

I agree and even liked your post, only that last sentence I disagree with.

When you press the issue and force her to say why she needs a break she WONT say;

" i met another dude who I think is more valuable than you, so I wanna see where that goes. If he doesnt want me I'll be back though ".

If she wants a break ASSUME this is what she says in ******** language. Pushing the issue is pushing yourself deeper in a shyte situation and using her lies to justify something that's unforgivable.