Does Your GF Let You Know She Got Home Okay?

[soulforge]

Simple question. If you're seeing a girl in a relationship type situation, do you guys ask her to let you know if she got home okay?

I mean for example, if she is traveling at night, using public transport etc. I tend to tell the girl I am seeing to let me know she got back home ok.

However sometimes feels a little beta to me, for doing that haha

 

[Jor-El]

Iv done/do it,Iv no idea if its beta or not,but I think in this day and age its just good manners and sensible. Think we can overthink these things.If someone told me it was the most beta thing I could ever do,well,id still do it. One day,you just might be glad you did

 

[Divorced w 3]

Iv done/do it,Iv no idea if its beta or not,but I think in this day and age its just good manners and sensible. Think we can overthink these things.If someone told me it was the most beta thing I could ever do,well,id still do it. One day,you just might be glad you did

I think it’s alpha AF to say let me know when you get home.

 

[Serenity]

However sometimes feels a little beta to me, for doing that haha

Genuinely caring about a woman you like/love isn't what's beta. What's beta is pandering to a woman to make her like you/fvck you/stay, it's done with selfish motives and THAT'S the part women resent. The fake niceness.

Shockingly many guys don't see the distinction and some avoid caring entirely because they confuse it with being a beta, which women also will resent eventually.

These fears are incompatible with relationships. The fear of not being nice enough and the fear of being a beta (too nice) are both destructive.

 

[Dr.Suave]

There´s always gonna be someone calling you beta for this or that. If you are happy with your girl and she has a higher sex drive than yours (or at least always complies when you initiate sex) who cares. The second this is not the case, you have to put you have to put your house in order or lay down the law.

 

[In2theGame]

I do it to make sure she's good. Sometimes she calls me if she's walking home alone at night.

If it's very late, I tell her to take an Uber home instead of the Subway.

 

[Dr.Suave]

Female chiming in.

I think asking is very kind and polite however a bit contrived. And can even be phony.

If he truly cared about her well being, he'd either drive her home himself or call her a cab and offer to pay.

THAT is alpha.

I've had boyfriends do both.

Or arrange the date closer to hers so she's not in the position of driving or walking home late at night by herself.

I don't see what purpose asking her to call when she gets home will serve.

I mean what's he gonna do if she doesn't call? Call the police?

Again, a nice gesture but doesn't mean much in the grand scheme.

JMO.

Both my fiancee and me actually prefer her driving to my house because it has a better location (not that she lives in a bad neighborhood or anything, but my house is closer to everything). I could pick her up and drive her home at the end of the night (like I did a bunch of times in the beginning) but it just seems a waste of time for both of us.

 

[Dr.Suave]

This makes sense, in which case simply have her stay the night. No?

She can drive back early morn when it's light outside and she's not so tired and/or tipsy from drinking.

P.S. Congrats on your engagement!

She lives with her parents. They have been cool about sex as long as its on the downlow or we are traveling but spending the night might be pushing it. Im ok with her not spending the night because Im used to sleeping by myself but I will have to get un-used to it once we are married.

Thanks girl!

 

[Gamisch]

Genuinely caring about a woman you like/love isn't what's beta. What's beta is pandering to a woman to make her like you/fvck you/stay, it's done with selfish motives and THAT'S the part women resent. The fake niceness.

Shockingly many guys don't see the distinction and some avoid caring entirely because they confuse it with being a beta, which women also will resent eventually.

These fears are incompatible with relationships. The fear of not being nice enough and the fear of being a beta (too nice) are both destructive.

100.

If you wonder about things like this , the overall conclusion is that you subconsciously know you ain't good enough for her. She might've told you straight up or communicated this through her actions towards you. Women somehow cant completely hide their disapproval towards you, whereas a man might be able to disguise it untill he at least gets the pvssy or his D sucked. Hence why a 8+ desperate man can hit a HB3 if needed.

I wonder in this specific case if it's the same Russian girl again OP? In that case , it starts to add up doesn't it? She is in it for 30% max and you "take care" of the other 70 %. In that case buying flowers, saying good night/morning, always having to take the initiative ect are ALL signs that you want it way more than she does. She will always make you feel like you are a alien descended from Planet trying too hard. Or Planet I try to control you but you're slipping away.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Genuinely caring about a woman you like/love isn't what's beta. What's beta is pandering to a woman to make her like you/fvck you/stay, it's done with selfish motives and THAT'S the part women resent. The fake niceness.

Shockingly many guys don't see the distinction and some avoid caring entirely because they confuse it with being a beta, which women also will resent eventually.

These fears are incompatible with relationships. The fear of not being nice enough and the fear of being a beta (too nice) are both destructive.

What's even funnier is guys will be all about doing that type of stuff with a random girl you been out with 3 times but could care less about it with a girl you've been dating for 2 years.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Which proves how contrived it actually is.

It's one of those standard dating rituals like buying a woman flowers during early stages, to impress her, show her what a "nice" guy he is..

Again if you truly cared, you'd drive her home or call her a Uber or cab.

That said, many women do fall for this shyt.

I'm on another forum and women have said if he doesn't ask her to call when she gets home, she will dump him.

Same with asking questions. If he doesn't ask the "right" questions, like "how was your day"? (ugh) in her mind, he doesn't give a crap and she will dump.

These are standard shyt tests all the way.

Hmm...that's actually funny because I ask about their day all the time and am actually interested in hearing about it and it seems to work out pretty well for me.

Genuinely being interested in someone other than yourself is a vastly underrated trait in others and increasingly hard to find it seems.

 

[Dr.Suave]

I'm glad I'm now out of that whole scene.

Same here. I enjoyed it, but I enjoy my current girl more.

 

[soulforge]

100.

If you wonder about things like this , the overall conclusion is that you subconsciously know you ain't good enough for her. She might've told you straight up or communicated this through her actions towards you. Women somehow cant completely hide their disapproval towards you, whereas a man might be able to disguise it untill he at least gets the pvssy or his D sucked. Hence why a 8+ desperate man can hit a HB3 if needed.

I wonder in this specific case if it's the same Russian girl again OP? In that case , it starts to add up doesn't it? She is in it for 30% max and you "take care" of the other 70 %. In that case buying flowers, saying good night/morning, always having to take the initiative ect are ALL signs that you want it way more than she does. She will always make you feel like you are a alien descended from Planet trying too hard. Or Planet I try to control you but you're slipping away.

Haha no mate, I don't necessarily want it more.. she does 90% of the good mornings and goodnights. In-fact I rarely ever initiate mornings/goodnights

She pushed for a relationship not me.. she suggested I meet her family and not me.. she bought up the subject of spending more time together, not me.. she suggested living together at some point.. not me haha

That's like 80% effort on her part.. and 20% on my part.

I simply asked this question because I have been out of the LTR game for a long time. My last LTR was maybe 5-6 years ago.. I have kept it casual for many years.

So sometimes when I do something LTRish, makes me cringe a little haha

 

[Gamisch]

Haha no mate, I don't necessarily want it more.. she does 90% of the good mornings and goodnights. In-fact I rarely ever initiate mornings/goodnights

She pushed for a relationship not me.. she suggested I meet her family and not me.. she bought up the subject of spending more time together, not me.. she suggested living together at some point.. not me haha

That's like 80% effort on her part.. and 20% on my part.

I simply asked this question because I have been out of the LTR game for a long time. My last LTR was maybe 5-6 years ago.. I have kept it casual for many years.

So sometimes when I do something LTRish, makes me cringe a little haha

Nothing wrong with being courteous. The biggest alphas and players are generally really courteous with women. Imagine a woman going out with L di carpio or P Escobar. They will be confident and also extremely charismatic and courteous. It's just that she can't and won't get it all the time and she'll have to share it with other women .

I am just saying that if it's the same girl you gotta watch your step. Seems like you got a so called blind spot for this woman, and that all good...Of course you can ask her if she came home safely if she initiates 80 % of the conversations. If it's the other way around you might have a problem. You know the deal better than anyone of us...

 

[soulforge]

Nothing wrong with being courteous. The biggest alphas and players are generally really courteous with women. Imagine a woman going out with L di carpio or P Escobar. They will be confident and also extremely charismatic and courteous. It's just that she can't and won't get it all the time and she'll have to share it with other women .

I am just saying that if it's the same girl you gotta watch your step. Seems like you got a so called blind spot for this woman, and that all good...Of course you can ask her if she came home safely of she initiates 80 % of the conversations. If it's the other way around you might have a problem. You know the deal better than anyone of us...

I agree with you.. I have pretty much weighed out the pros and cons with this girl..

She's a 24 year old chick, who may or may not be suitable for a LTR... I'm willing to give her an opportunity. However I'm also realistic about the possibilities with her.. One foot is always out of the door.. If it comes to a sudden end, oh well it was a fun encounter with a hot Russian girl for a short period of time.

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

Simple question. If you're seeing a girl in a relationship type situation, do you guys ask her to let you know if she got home okay?

I mean for example, if she is traveling at night, using public transport etc. I tend to tell the girl I am seeing to let me know she got back home ok.

However sometimes feels a little beta to me, for doing that haha

Aint what you do, it is how you do it.

Beta way *text*: Honey, sweetie pie, Sugar candy drop. Did you make it home safely?

Alpha way *text*: You good?

 

[Stanley]

I normally hit em with a 'drive safe' as they leave, but I do that to just about everyone. If it was a girl I was seeing and I new she had a distance to go or it was late she would tell me she got home safe and say thankyou, I've not had to ask, but I don't think it is beta to make sure your girl is home safe and sound.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

I just asked her to let me know when she got back home lol.

 

[Murk]

“Get home safe” is enough, otherwise you get a text later, when they leave my house I don’t want to engage with them until tomorrow, minimum