Is Hot and Cold Behavior the Solution in Dating?

Dean Raymond

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Is hot and cold (push/pull) behaviour the solution to increasing the attraction with a woman we’re interested in, has anyone tried this with a positive outcome?
 

The Duke

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Yes it is effective, however the type of girls that respond best to push/pull aren't the ones you really want. Its almost like using a certain bait to catch a certain type of fish. Push/Pull is great bait for catching crazies.

You will also end up laying girls that had mediocre interest at first. Push/Pull helped me increase interest level enough to get the lay. However that lasts for about 3wks and then its exhausting to keep playing mental games for a piece of azz.

The relationships made possible by push/pull always lasted bout 2months. Its all because the attraction you created wasn't real. All you were doing is manipulating their emotions to make them feel they were more attracted than they were. Remember women always like to feel tingles.

As far as long term relationships go, yes a guy still has to use some hot/cold. You should never care more about the relationship than she does. When you find yourself there, her attraction starts to slip away and you will need to pull back. A woman will never get rid of a guy that can be a dihk to her. But she will get rid of a guy that is a pushover.

I think it was @Atom Smasher that made the analogy of women how they are like the tide against the ocean shore. Ebb and Flow. They like to be in that constant state of gradual flux. Its when they are most grounded.
 
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Bingo-Player

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For it to work you need to be highly experienced and despondent with women

Most men aren't and will fall to bits at the slightest hint of interest from a 7, 8 or 9

I am currently smashing an 8.5 but honestly i couldn't care if i never saw her again because i have so much self control and bigger priorities

She knows this which is why she keeps coming back to me for more

It's female nature to want men to be obsessed with them , in her mind she HAS to get me to be obssesed with her and when i won't bend to her will it is like crack Coac*ne to her
 

soulforge

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For it to work you need to be highly experienced and despondent with women

Most men aren't and will fall to bits at the slightest hint of interest from a 7, 8 or 9

I am currently smashing an 8.5 but honestly i couldn't care if i never saw her again because i have so much self control and bigger priorities

She knows this which is why she keeps coming back to me for more

It's female nature to want men to be obsessed with them , in her mind she HAS to get me to be obssesed with her and when i won't bend to her will it is like crack Coac*ne to her
I like this post.. You mentioned that your 8.5 keeps coming back for more?

You also mentioned that the girl has to care more & the guy less.

Who reaches out the most in your case to arrange to dates or hook ups?

In my situation, one of my plates, I have arranged the hook up the first 4x would it be wise to let her reach out moving forward.

I mean, if I am the one always asking or arranging to meet, it's suggests that I care more
 

The Duke

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I mean, if I am the one always asking or arranging to meet, it's suggests that I care more
This is where its a little different. By setting up dates you are leading. As long as a woman complies to your requests you are golden. When she starts making excuses and changing plans is when you pull away.

Her compliance is showing SHE cares. You asking her out is showing YOU care. As long as this happens it stays fair and balanced.

As relationships progress she will set up dates and that's fine.
 

soulforge

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This is where its a little different. By setting up dates you are leading. As long as a woman complies to your requests you are golden. When she starts making excuses and changing plans is when you pull away.

Her compliance is showing SHE cares. You asking her out is showing YOU care. As long as this happens it stays fair and balanced.

As relationships progress she will set up dates and that's fine.
I have arranged 5x so far, is that too much?
 

Pierce Manhammer

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I had a crazy hot kinda plate, it was all me getting fed up, dump, block, she’d lose it cry, beg, find me and give me the best most submissive hot crazy sex, rinse, lather, repeat. Cray.

Let’s hope it sticks this time, she genuinely was fd up.
 

Bokanovsky

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Is hot and cold (push/pull) behaviour the solution to increasing the attraction with a woman we’re interested in, has anyone tried this with a positive outcome?
If there was a universal recipe for increasing attraction with a woman, don't you think that someone would have discovered it before you??
 

FlexpertHamilton

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No, it is not the solution. Being direct in your actions is the best way. The “pull” in push/pull is called not being thirsty. If she backs away, you back away further.
I would add to this and say you can also direct in your words and force them to communicate overtly.

Bottom line is, if they don't play ball, walk away. I am tired of men saying women don't respond to logic/direct communication. If you are direct AND willing to walk away, they will comform.
 

MatureDJ

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I'm a bit luke-warm in my feelings about this ...
 

Bingo-Player

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I like this post.. You mentioned that your 8.5 keeps coming back for more?

You also mentioned that the girl has to care more & the guy less.

Who reaches out the most in your case to arrange to dates or hook ups?
8 / 10 she will
 

At this point you probably have a woman (or multiple women) chasing you around, calling you all the time, wanting to be with you. So let's talk about how to KEEP a woman interested in you once you have her. This is BIG! There is nothing worse than getting dumped by a woman that you really, really like.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Sleeperhead

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Is hot and cold (push/pull) behaviour the solution to increasing the attraction with a woman we’re interested in, has anyone tried this with a positive outcome?
Push-pull is natural to seduction. You have to give space in between for girls to develop attraction. You naturally push then pull.

What you are talking about is feigning disinterest in a manipulative way to get laid. I have tried this with a few girls and to be fair it does work to an extent to raise their interest level, but ultimately you will get found out.

I personally, do not have the patience anymore to play these games, if a girl does not reciprocate interest or is blowing hot and cold herself then the best course of action is to pull away completely for your own self respect. I see beta guys begging off women and I do not want to lower myself to their level. The natural solution to dating is to improve yourself, not play games.
 

darksprezzatura

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Putting effort towards a woman to increase her attraction towards you reeks of seeking validation.

I express what I feel for my wkmen without any expectation of reciprocity. I focus on my mission which automatically makes me distant. I care for my women and make time for them.

This kind of subconscious push pull is what they find attractive. Care for women but balance it by caring for your purpose more.
 

SW15

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Is hot and cold (push/pull) behaviour the solution to increasing the attraction with a woman we’re interested in, has anyone tried this with a positive outcome?
There is a reason hot and cold is effective. While popular music isn't always meaningful, there was a reason 23 year old Katy Perry wrote a song "Hot n Cold" about some guy where she was massively attracted. Katy Perry was in her absolute prime at the point that song was released. Now, she's an aging older Millennial at 38 with a kid. Hot and cold tactics will get a pretty girl like Katy Perry in her prime attracted.

Yes it is effective, however the type of girls that respond best to push/pull aren't the ones you really want. Its almost like using a certain bait to catch a certain type of fish. Push/Pull is great bait for catching crazies.

You will also end up laying girls that had mediocre interest at first. Push/Pull helped me increase interest level enough to get the lay. However that lasts for about 3wks and then its exhausting to keep playing mental games for a piece of azz.

The relationships made possible by push/pull always lasted bout 2months. Its all because the attraction you created wasn't real. All you were doing is manipulating their emotions to make them feel they were more attracted than they were. Remember women always like to feel tingles.

As far as long term relationships go, yes a guy still has to use some hot/cold. You should never care more about the relationship than she does. When you find yourself there, her attraction starts to slip away and you will need to pull back. A woman will never get rid of a guy that can be a dihk to her. But she will get rid of a guy that is a pushover.

I think it was @Atom Smasher that made the analogy of women how they are like the tide against the ocean shore. Ebb and Flow. They like to be in that constant state of gradual flux. Its when they are most grounded.
This is perfect. Women are governed by the vaginal tingles. Hot and cold behavior will do that more. It is important to note that hot and cold is a part of holding frame in a longer term arrangement.
 

derby1

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Is hot and cold (push/pull) behaviour the solution to increasing the attraction with a woman we’re interested in, has anyone tried this with a positive outcome?
The modern woman is a narcissist, she has little interest in love, unity, your passions and hobbies or anything more than her solipsism.

she has one interest only, and thats to be desired.

Ive tested this theory many times by appearing to lose interest after a few weeks. She will start asking you all the kind & loving questions she should have asked you in the first place (as she panics to regain your validation)
 
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