Inner Game vs Routines?

[RSDCharlie]

Guys what's your take on having inner game vs using canned routines?

I feel routines can be very helpful at times, especially if you run out of things to say. However, for routines to work, you have to make them a natural part of talking to girls. Practice, and practice till you could say them authentically.

However, I have no clue how filling up your mind with inner game crap be any helpful in picking up girls. Sure you can read about rationalisation,mindfulness,meditate (which i would recommend) and do other inner game stuff, but if you don't even know what to say to the girl, whats the use of learning inner game?

I feel routines get a bad rep in the pua community. I find them way more helpful than learning inner game.

What are your thoughts guys?

 

[pipeman84]

Inner game isn't some 'crap' you fill your mind with...that's what routines are. Inner game is a state of being, out of which comes the right words and body language at the right time.

I feel routines get a bad rep in the pua community. I find them way more helpful than learning inner game.

You can go from zero to hero in routines in a day, but you can't change who you are so fast. It's a bit like turning a 12yrs old into an 18yrs old...it takes time.

 

[SargeMaximus]

Routines are most of it ime. Even when I had women approaching me on the regular, I ruined it because I didn’t know how to talk to them.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

When I was first learning game and cold approach, I found routines to be very helpful. They help you fake it until you make it. They force you into doing and saying things that you find to be counter-intuitive and would never think to do on your own, but when you do them, it is a learning experiment for you because you see how women react to something you would otherwise never do and this is what gets you into the 1% club. There are also "frameworks" that could be thought of as routines, but they aren't quite what most people consider "game". For example, there is a conversational framework that helps you get into deeper, more meaningful conversations with people. The framework goes, "General, Specific, Feeling, Relatable." This means you start by asking a very general question like "What's your favorite thing to do on the weekends?" When she answers, you ask a specific question about it to get more details. Then you ask her questions to try to learn why she likes it and how it makes her feel. Then you say something about yourself that relates to either the thing she said she likes to do, or the feeling it gives her. This can be used in any conversation with a stranger, and it really helps push past any beginner-nervousness or awkwardness that results in you asking surface-level question after surface-level question and having it feel like a job interview.

A routine can never be perfect, nor perfect for every situation and woman. But if you are smart enough to select the right routines, they can help you experience things you've never experienced before, and learn a lot. Once it starts to click, you will start to see what sorts of things work best for you - for your specific look, vibe, personality, and you'll start winging things more. Sometimes if you are nervous or don't know what to say for some reason, you can fall back to your favorite routine or two which is much better than nothing.

The big thing is picking the right routines, if you are going to try them. There is a lot of cringe-worthy stuff out there.

 

[RSDCharlie]

When I was first learning game and cold approach, I found routines to be very helpful. They help you fake it until you make it. They force you into doing and saying things that you find to be counter-intuitive and would never think to do on your own, but when you do them, it is a learning experiment for you because you see how women react to something you would otherwise never do and this is what gets you into the 1% club. There are also "frameworks" that could be thought of as routines, but they aren't quite what most people consider "game". For example, there is a conversational framework that helps you get into deeper, more meaningful conversations with people. The framework goes, "General, Specific, Feeling, Relatable." This means you start by asking a very general question like "What's your favorite thing to do on the weekends?" When she answers, you ask a specific question about it to get more details. Then you ask her questions to try to learn why she likes it and how it makes her feel. Then you say something about yourself that relates to either the thing she said she likes to do, or the feeling it gives her. This can be used in any conversation with a stranger, and it really helps push past any beginner-nervousness or awkwardness that results in you asking surface-level question after surface-level question and having it feel like a job interview.

A routine can never be perfect, nor perfect for every situation and woman. But if you are smart enough to select the right routines, they can help you experience things you've never experienced before, and learn a lot. Once it starts to click, you will start to see what sorts of things work best for you - for your specific look, vibe, personality, and you'll start winging things more. Sometimes if you are nervous or don't know what to say for some reason, you can fall back to your favorite routine or two which is much better than nothing.

The big thing is picking the right routines, if you are going to try them. There is a lot of cringe-worthy stuff out there.

That's more like it. Good to hear a different viewpoint. What type of routines do you recommend mostly? Something that captivates her attention?