How to Escalate During Dinner Date

corsica

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There's a few other threads about dinning with prospects but no actual details on how to escalate.

I don't pay for dinner unless I already had sex with a girl. But I already did that in the past.

What I don't like about dinner is that the girl is sitting across from you and during that time, it's difficult to escalate. If you're at a bar sitting or venue standing up, you're speaking to her with your face close to hers (touching here and there indirectly) and when she shows interest signals, you can go for a kiss and from there easily convince her to go somewhere else later. Everything becomes smooth after the kiss.
As for dinners; You're there for let's say, 90 minutes. The more you talk, the higher the chances of the girl to lose interest since you might end up saying something she doesn't like or talking about a sad subject. It's a like a job interview! The few times I was able to escalate was by grabbing the girl's hands after she mentioned something about Astrology (or some other BS). I used as an excuse to "read" her fortune, lol. Then I continued talking still holding her hands for an extra moment looking at her eyes. After the dinner, going to my car I grabbed her hand like I was her boyfriend and before reaching the car I went for a kiss (sex on 2nd date).
BIG DETAIL: The girls were already in my social circle. There was an initial interest to begin with. Both girls mentioned grabbing their hands were "excessive/pushy/whatever" (I don't remember the exact words) but it worked I guess.

So for the more experienced gents who say they're successful with dinner dates... How do you escalate? Share the recipe details.
 

bmp2cpm

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My philosophy (long post)….

Do not go on a dinner date until you have had several “active” dates and have already kissed the girl some. Dinner dates should lead to her going to your place.

“Active” dates are shopping malls, museums, parks (where you can hike or do photography), and massive historic gardens. At the end of a good “active” date you move in for the kiss if her body language is right. If not, next her.

If the girl really likes you, she will make the kiss happen on an “active” date.

Once a girl started making out with me on a bench at an art museum. First date, but she called me several times a week for 3 weeks before our first date so there was already some pre-vetting. Multiple location date too, ie breakfast, museum, lunch. Lots of kissing.

Another time I went hike in a big park with a girl and we took photos. She had a cold, so after the date I texted her that I wanted to kiss her but held back because of her cold. The very beginning of the next date, the first thing she told me was to kiss her. :lol:

Act indifferent on the “active” dates (like you are on the fence about nexting them) and the probability of her giving you openings for kisses increases dramatically.

Once you get to the dinner date, let her do all the talking. Say as little as possible about you. Keep asking her questions about herself. And flirt, be playful and carefree throughout dinner.

Again, act indifferent at dinner like you are looking for reasons to next her. Watch her body language and constantly match hers. Ignore anything she is saying. Only body language matters here.

If body language is good, invite her to your place at the end of dinner. If she declines, next her.

Dating is like a movie but too many guys here want to skip the beginning of the movie and go straight to the end. That is called failure my friend.

Good luck!
 
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corsica

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I made this thread mostly out of curiosity. Dinner and movie (theater) are quite common keywords used for a first date and I'm wondering how to escalate. I remember in my teens going to the movies with a girl and having a hard time finding the best way to go for a kiss since you can't talk in the middle of the movie. For a girl already interested, it's more straight forward but for one in the fence...
 

bat soup

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There's a few other threads about dinning with prospects but no actual details on how to escalate.

I don't pay for dinner unless I already had sex with a girl. But I already did that in the past.

What I don't like about dinner is that the girl is sitting across from you and during that time, it's difficult to escalate. If you're at a bar sitting or venue standing up, you're speaking to her with your face close to hers (touching here and there indirectly) and when she shows interest signals, you can go for a kiss and from there easily convince her to go somewhere else later. Everything becomes smooth after the kiss.
As for dinners; You're there for let's say, 90 minutes. The more you talk, the higher the chances of the girl to lose interest since you might end up saying something she doesn't like or talking about a sad subject. It's a like a job interview! The few times I was able to escalate was by grabbing the girl's hands after she mentioned something about Astrology (or some other BS). I used as an excuse to "read" her fortune, lol. Then I continued talking still holding her hands for an extra moment looking at her eyes. After the dinner, going to my car I grabbed her hand like I was her boyfriend and before reaching the car I went for a kiss (sex on 2nd date).
BIG DETAIL: The girls were already in my social circle. There was an initial interest to begin with. Both girls mentioned grabbing their hands were "excessive/pushy/whatever" (I don't remember the exact words) but it worked I guess.

So for the more experienced gents who say they're successful with dinner dates... How do you escalate? Share the recipe details.
You mean how to escalate when there's a huge block of wood between you and the girl, a whole room full of onlookers and she's only there to suck down free food and drink at your expense.

Yeah, good luck with that.
 

Gamisch

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Its funny that this "first date etiquette " probably was originated in the 60's and still hold up today.

I say that because we have to realize this was a time when everything moved at a slower pace. No cellphones, internet, travel wasn't as comfortable as today, you get the picture.

Nowedays everything moves faster. A man who takes women on 1st dates like this is the equivalent of a woman love bombing a man she just met.

Its like a man is saying;" hey I am this perfect bluepilled beta, all I need is a wet hole to share all this beta ness with."

A man who has options is like a employer who is looking for applicants with the best resume. You want a quick and effortless first impression and decide from there whether this applicant is worthy of your time or not.

A first dinner date indicates you are desperate. I even believe it might hurt your chances with a woman who actually like you(hence the love bombing metaphor).
 
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bat soup

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Its funny that this "first date etiquette " probably was originated in the 60's and still hold up today.

I say that because we have to realize this was a time when everything moved at a slower pace. No cellphones, internet, travel wasn't as comfortable as today, you get the picture.

Nowedays everything moves faster. A man who takes women on 1st dates like this is the equivalent of a woman love bombing a man she just met.

Its like a man is saying;" hey I am this perfect bluepilled beta, all I need is a wet hole to share all this beta ness with."

A man who has options is like a employer who is looking for applicants with the best resume. You want a quick and effortless first impression and decide from there whether ghosts applicant is worthy of your time or not.

A first dinner date indicates you are desperate. I even believe it might hurt your chances with a woman who actually like you(hence the love bombing metaphor).
A woman who likes you is unlikely to want a dinner date because she knows a restaurant is a terrible place for escalation.

If a woman insists on a dinner date, then she's pretty much guaranteed to be a time waster.
 

Gamisch

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A woman who likes you is unlikely to want a dinner date because she knows a restaurant is a terrible place for escalation.

If a woman insists on a dinner date, then she's pretty much guaranteed to be a time waster.
Yeah , to add to this theory, women are already extremely insecure, and a bloated belly , some Mexican beans farts when you pound her doggy and onion breath is also not a ideal situation for them.

When you take a woman you dont know on a dinner date you basically say" lets NOT have s3x today"!
 

Gamisch

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There's a few other threads about dinning with prospects but no actual details on how to escalate.

I don't pay for dinner unless I already had sex with a girl. But I already did that in the past.

What I don't like about dinner is that the girl is sitting across from you and during that time, it's difficult to escalate. If you're at a bar sitting or venue standing up, you're speaking to her with your face close to hers (touching here and there indirectly) and when she shows interest signals, you can go for a kiss and from there easily convince her to go somewhere else later. Everything becomes smooth after the kiss.
As for dinners; You're there for let's say, 90 minutes. The more you talk, the higher the chances of the girl to lose interest since you might end up saying something she doesn't like or talking about a sad subject. It's a like a job interview! The few times I was able to escalate was by grabbing the girl's hands after she mentioned something about Astrology (or some other BS). I used as an excuse to "read" her fortune, lol. Then I continued talking still holding her hands for an extra moment looking at her eyes. After the dinner, going to my car I grabbed her hand like I was her boyfriend and before reaching the car I went for a kiss (sex on 2nd date).
BIG DETAIL: The girls were already in my social circle. There was an initial interest to begin with. Both girls mentioned grabbing their hands were "excessive/pushy/whatever" (I don't remember the exact words) but it worked I guess.

So for the more experienced gents who say they're successful with dinner dates... How do you escalate? Share the recipe details.
Dinner date is like rewarding your child by taking them to the zoo or cinema or something like that. You just watch them enjoy themselves, silently. It's a reward for being a good woman. No talk is needed at this point as its clear she got this reward for things being said and DONE before this occasion.

Watch what happens when you "reward " a child before they showed you good behaviour. You spoil them and they become entitled.

As I said before, she gotta feel comfortable to such a degree where she already knows s3x will happen that day, she can shower at your place ect. There is no magic trick how to escalate during dinner.

Beta men believe wearing a suite and paying for everything is a form of " escalating ", but it's quite the opposite actually. Its a form of self sabotaging when dealing with women you've just met
 

Young OG

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There's a few other threads about dinning with prospects but no actual details on how to escalate.

I don't pay for dinner unless I already had sex with a girl. But I already did that in the past.

What I don't like about dinner is that the girl is sitting across from you and during that time, it's difficult to escalate. If you're at a bar sitting or venue standing up, you're speaking to her with your face close to hers (touching here and there indirectly) and when she shows interest signals, you can go for a kiss and from there easily convince her to go somewhere else later. Everything becomes smooth after the kiss.
As for dinners; You're there for let's say, 90 minutes. The more you talk, the higher the chances of the girl to lose interest since you might end up saying something she doesn't like or talking about a sad subject. It's a like a job interview! The few times I was able to escalate was by grabbing the girl's hands after she mentioned something about Astrology (or some other BS). I used as an excuse to "read" her fortune, lol. Then I continued talking still holding her hands for an extra moment looking at her eyes. After the dinner, going to my car I grabbed her hand like I was her boyfriend and before reaching the car I went for a kiss (sex on 2nd date).
BIG DETAIL: The girls were already in my social circle. There was an initial interest to begin with. Both girls mentioned grabbing their hands were "excessive/pushy/whatever" (I don't remember the exact words) but it worked I guess.

So for the more experienced gents who say they're successful with dinner dates... How do you escalate? Share the recipe details.
Easy. Don’t do dinner dates.
 

SW15

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Don’t do dinner dates.
I agree. I am amazed that we're talking dinner dates in restaurants prior to sex in 2022. I learned the rule of "no dinner dates in restaurants prior to sex" in the early 2010s and I felt I was late to the party in terms of knowing that. By the time I learned it, I was nearly 30 years and had over a decade of dating experience.

A former female friend (I wasn't attracted to her) was getting dinner date offers off of Tinder as a mid-30s childless woman within the last couple of years. I thought that was insane.
 

BackInTheGame78

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This is simple.

If you already have fvcked her there really isn't much need to have a plan to escalate...just say some sexual sh!t to her since she will already be receptive to it.

If you haven't and/or this is a first date why are you at dinner anyway? The first dinner she should experience with you is at your house when you invite her over. Then you don't need to worry about how to escalate, it kind of takes care of itself.
 

SW15

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I learned the rule of "no dinner dates in restaurants prior to sex" in the early 2010s
If you haven't and/or this is a first date why are you at dinner anyway? The first dinner she should experience with you is at your house when you invite her over. Then you don't need to worry about how to escalate, it kind of takes care of itself.
Yes, this is how I have been doing that for a decade.

I think a dinner first date is acceptable if the first date is arranged through a strong social circle connection and you already had some isolated time together over a drink at a private residence party where you two were first introduced. You have more leeway on those types of first dates. In this day and age, that's a rare occurrence. Meeting someone through friends, acquaintances, or co-workers has been declining since the 1990s (see chart below).

Most men today are setting up their dates through swipe apps, the DMs on Twitter and Instagram, or random stranger approaches (mostly in bars, though a few brave men are doing non-bar approaches).


How Heterosexual Couples Meet.jpg
 

Dr.Suave

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You guys are trippin'. Obviously if you are going for a 1st date lay and you think you can pull it off, then by all means: Dont do dinner on the 1st date.

But she´s not exclusive material then, plate status only. On the 1% chance this chick is actually wife material, then a 1st date dinner is fine IF:

- She has high interest
- You have a strong frame
- And you actually enjoy going out to dinner and you are enjoying yourself. Problem is, most of you dont even enjoy dating, you just in it for the lay and women pick up on that.
 

lost_blackbird

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What I don't like about dinner is that the girl is sitting across from you and during that time,
Find somewhere you can eat at the bar?
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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There's a few other threads about dinning with prospects but no actual details on how to escalate.

I don't pay for dinner unless I already had sex with a girl. But I already did that in the past.

What I don't like about dinner is that the girl is sitting across from you and during that time, it's difficult to escalate. If you're at a bar sitting or venue standing up, you're speaking to her with your face close to hers (touching here and there indirectly) and when she shows interest signals, you can go for a kiss and from there easily convince her to go somewhere else later. Everything becomes smooth after the kiss.
As for dinners; You're there for let's say, 90 minutes. The more you talk, the higher the chances of the girl to lose interest since you might end up saying something she doesn't like or talking about a sad subject. It's a like a job interview! The few times I was able to escalate was by grabbing the girl's hands after she mentioned something about Astrology (or some other BS). I used as an excuse to "read" her fortune, lol. Then I continued talking still holding her hands for an extra moment looking at her eyes. After the dinner, going to my car I grabbed her hand like I was her boyfriend and before reaching the car I went for a kiss (sex on 2nd date).
BIG DETAIL: The girls were already in my social circle. There was an initial interest to begin with. Both girls mentioned grabbing their hands were "excessive/pushy/whatever" (I don't remember the exact words) but it worked I guess.

So for the more experienced gents who say they're successful with dinner dates... How do you escalate? Share the recipe details.
School boy error. Who dinner date's in 2022?

It's moronic to put ***** on lay away. You do drinks or coffee and you bounce locations. Location where sex is plausible.
 

cns

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Dinner date is great if you really love her and want to make it special. It also means she is a gf material or already your gf. If you just want to have sex dinner date is not worth it.

During dinner date what you can do is, behave like as if you guys are already couple. Create fun vibes no serious topics, no arguments. These days it is normal to take pics of food so doing that you should also go near her and take selfie with her but putting your hand around her. Tell her, she is smelling really good, take couple of pics and move her around giving some excuse that light is not proper or something. You must do compliance test, if she is comfortable then you can escalate. Otherwise it is unlikely she is going home with you
 

BackInTheGame78

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You guys are trippin'. Obviously if you are going for a 1st date lay and you think you can pull it off, then by all means: Dont do dinner on the 1st date.

But she´s not exclusive material then, plate status only. On the 1% chance this chick is actually wife material, then a 1st date dinner is fine IF:

- She has high interest
- You have a strong frame
- And you actually enjoy going out to dinner and you are enjoying yourself. Problem is, most of you dont even enjoy dating, you just in it for the lay and women pick up on that.
I simply think dinner has a poor cost to value ratio. Also you are forced to spend a lengthy period of time with someone you don't know even if you aren't interested.

IMHO there really is no reason to go on a dinner date on date 1.
 

2Rocky

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From personal experience, I've just picked up my chair and moved it over next to her.....
Plausible reasons include:
Here try this it's amazing
Let me show you this photo/video of my (dog, vacation, sports highlights...Whatever)
Dining outside and she is closer to the heat source on a cool evening.
We are sharing the dessert.
You look cold, here let me warm you up..
I'm having trouble hearing you and I don't read lips well...


Small plates (tapas) lends itself well to SHARING a Meal. This reinforces the shared experiences, and taps into the primal sense of nourishing one another.

I recall one time i met up with a female friend and her friend from college. We closed down the taproom and went down the street to the microbrewery and ordered dinner. After some prolonged eye contact with the friend of a friend I made no bones about arranging my chair next to her, Facing our mutual friend of course....
We sit across the table from one another, and eye contact gets intense. When she leaves and comes back from the bathroom with fresh mascara and her hair down I move my chair over kitty corner to her. She scoots her chair over in my direction. I put my hand on her knee under the table and she spreads her legs up against mine. I caress her calf and ankle under the table the rest of the time we are there. We drink about 3 rounds there then move on to another bar yet undetermined at that time. When our mutual friend goes to the bathroom, I pull her into my arms and she initiates the kiss...Oh yeah it's on....​
 

Aristippus

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Here's an idea or two for you. Have dinner at your place or her place. If you have dinner out, being across the table isn't a huge obstacle. Women sometimes play "footsies" with you under the table. You can easily go from gazing into a woman's eyes, to a subtle touch on the wrist or top of the hand to holding hands. Sometimes she'll move from across the table to sit next to you. Put your hand just close enough on the table where she can touch your hand during conversation and leave it there. If you have a decent, relaxed vibe and relaxed eye contact, many times she will initiate touch during the conversation. Try it.
 
M

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Here's an idea or two for you. Have dinner at your place or her place. If you have dinner out, being across the table isn't a huge obstacle. Women sometimes play "footsies" with you under the table. You can easily go from gazing into a woman's eyes, to a subtle touch on the wrist or top of the hand to holding hands. Sometimes she'll move from across the table to sit next to you. Put your hand just close enough on the table where she can touch your hand during conversation and leave it there. If you have a decent, relaxed vibe and relaxed eye contact, many times she will initiate touch during the conversation. Try it.
Trying it tonight, thanks!
 
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