No Second Date? It's OK!

[member160292]

Lately, I've been running into a string of first dates that didn't lead to anything further. I've been researching on what I can do to increase the odds of getting that second date. Granted, I've had a streak of OLD profiles that are younger than me, most don't have anything in order.

Prefacing, I'm more of a relationship guy, someone that has their crap together or one that I can mentor to align with my goals. Most women that don't fit my lifestyle are easily turned off. They simply can't relate to what my relationships should be, or who I want to become.

It's OK! I didn't try to relate to them, if they are not on my level....It's OK!! As long as I'm doing my best on filtering women worth my time, I know that I'll be happy long term. I hope you guys are doing well =)

 

[Skyline]

Just relax man. I haven’t been on a date in about 4 years and my success with women has never been better. It sounds like you’re taking dating too seriously in just wanting a relationship but just for the name- it comes across as fake.

I have a pretty boy/fvck boy image because I talk to a crap ton of women regardless if they’re attractive. But the thing is, I also talk to everyone else. I’m never focusing conversation for only women.

 

[BDDazza]

Lately, I've been running into a string of first dates that didn't lead to anything further. I've been researching on what I can do to increase the odds of getting that second date. Granted, I've had a streak of OLD profiles that are younger than me, most don't have anything in order.

The dates were either boring, or during the date she made a decision that you wasn't right for her. In actuality the problem is you. Right or wrong she screened you out after deciding that you wasn't up to her high standard.

Prefacing, I'm more of a relationship guy, someone that has their crap together or one that I can mentor to align with my goals. Most women that don't fit my lifestyle are easily turned off. They simply can't relate to what my relationships should be, or who I want to become.

None of this is relevant, because it isn't the reason the women are ghosting you after the first date. A women will adapt to your lifestyle if they are interested!

It's OK! I didn't try to relate to them, if they are not on my level....It's OK!! As long as I'm doing my best on filtering women worth my time, I know that I'll be happy long term. I hope you guys are doing well =)

Maybe if you put a bit of effort to relate to them you would find some commonality. You expect a women to put in effort if you don't? Also shouldn't you filter women before taking them out on a date?

 

[member160292]

I might have not conveyed my thoughts clearly.

Reading up on the experiences of guys here, the general consensus is 20-50% of first dates lead to second ones. Once you understand that the odds aren't in your favor in the first place, my point is to not seek to relate to women that does not fit your criteria. Many will try to tailor who they are to match the level of their date, trying to create the chemistry that's not congruent with yourself.

It's really just a numbers game, you are trying to disqualify these women the same as they are doing to you. If it doesn't work out, don't sweat it and move on to the nest.

 

[corrector]

It depends which posters. The chads and chadlites are complaining women put out too easy in the first date, so to say 20-25% no second date sounds more normie tier. At least you are getting first dates so you arent a sub5.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

You are either not compatible and the girl isn’t just looking for meaningless sex- This should be apparent to you at all after the first day

or

She is a hopeless romantic on the swipe apps looking for a rich Tyrone Jesus Tarzan demigod- basically you have to screw her on the first date lol

 

[2Rocky]

I might have not conveyed my thoughts clearly.

Reading up on the experiences of guys here, the general consensus is 20-50% of first dates lead to second ones.

and your Emotional and Financial Investment in first dates should reflect this. This is why I like to meet women out and about already at a venue. Our experience there is like a first date. Then the follow up "date" one on one can proceed with a higher degree of Rapport.

 

[2Rocky]

This doesnt exist Chowdah. Women do not have their **** together. They have it together when you do.
Good women are made. Not found. Burn that into your mind.
The so called 304s out here are a product of not being able to enforce capitol punishment. Thats what they need. Or an institution.

While I feel like an attitude of superiority is healthy in a man, this goes way too far into a Negative mindset. You are giving away your power by focusing on the negative. Black pill thinking.

 

[Skyline]

This doesnt exist Chowdah. Women do not have their **** together. They have it together when you do.
Good women are made. Not found. Burn that into your mind.
The so called 304s out here are a product of not being able to enforce capitol punishment. Thats what they need. Or an institution.

Men don’t really have their shvt together either. I think everyone can benefit from consistent therapy but capital punishment or a mental asylum across the board is ridiculous.

If anyone is being toxic to your life then cut them out. I don’t really agree that good women can’t be found, it’s all a matter of what you’re attracting the most that dictates the quality of people drawn to you. Boundaries is really all you need, there’s no cultivating the perfect woman unless maybe you’re a father of a child. You can’t really force someone to be a certain way, that just sounds like a lot of energy wasted because you’re so focused on making the relationships work out.

If you’re advocating for only women’s behavior to be punished by law then you are so far removed from society and are going to attract removed women from society.

 

[SW15]

She is a hopeless romantic on the swipe apps looking for a rich Tyrone Jesus Tarzan demigod- basically you have to screw her on the first date lol

That's a big part of why I had a lot of "one date, no sex, no second date" type interactions on swipe apps. I was dealing the college graduate, hopeless romantic White woman type. Some of those women sit out on apps for many years doing that. They might have some short term casual sex but they are mostly showing up for dates, getting free drinks/meals, not having sex, and not having second dates.

 

[SW15]

Ive seen women with the same pics online that i met before going back as far as 2011. Lol smh

I'm not surprised at all. There are numerous perpetually single women on the apps. In a way, Match Group likes to see people who are perpetually single. They stay in the app ecosystem.

My Tinder Decade

How did a dating app become my longest running relationship?

www.thecut.com

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

That's a big part of why I had a lot of "one date, no sex, no second date" type interactions on swipe apps. I was dealing the college graduate, hopeless romantic White woman type. Some of those women sit out on apps for many years doing that. They might have some short term casual sex but they are mostly showing up for dates, getting free drinks/meals, not having sex, and not having second dates.

I’ve remained friends with some after dating them. They have usually been emotionally damaged from some high value psychopath in the past, they own multiple dogs, only search for high value men or anomalies, have a demanding career, and have a huge FOMO social peer pressure complex that can lead them in to situations deemed unfaithful while in a relationship.

 

[momentomori]

Dude, I rarely get second dates even if I have a 1.5 hour date with good chemistry. Just expect them to ghost at any step of the process and try to at least invite the girl to your apartment on the first date.

 

[SW15]

Dude, I rarely get second dates even if I have a 1.5 hour date with good chemistry. Just expect them to ghost at any step of the process and try to at least invite the girl to your apartment on the first date.

That would be a reason to attempt to have sex on the first date. The more probable outcome is not to see them again. Having sex on the first date creates emotional investment for the woman provided that the sex is good. There's more pressure now than in the past to have sex on the first date and have good first date sex.

 

[sevbucmash]

Bro! If your wallet is fat and you have your success in order, women will be getting pregnant from you over bluetooth. They go out with you on first date, because you're adorable on photos and have your stuff together chatting with them, but then they see the rest and no second date.

 

[Skyline]

The short version to all this mentally is she obeying and following? Does she listen to you( hopefully a good man) when you tell her what to do?

No not really. The short version of what I said was people can be toxic and all you need is strong boundaries to maintain any relationship romantic or not. The “if she obeys commands” just sounds incredibly insecure.

Yes, that’s what I got from what you said. Your red pill friends are worried about what’s going on in the community because more men are starting to realize that more than half of it is bullshvt. You not even trying to defend to your positions and resorting to attacks is proof of that because you guys go on about how this “exclusive red pill club” are the only ones to understand ridiculous viewpoints.

But go on about how if a 304 doesn’t obey commands then a mental asylum or capital punishment is needed.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

I would also like to add that even if you do get a lay out of these perpetually single girls on the apps, it never amounts to anything from my experience. Usually, they start playing games pretty soon.

 

[member160292]

First date tonight that owns a $3M+ house. Good body language during our conversations. Toward the end, she said she wanted something to eat, but nothing was open. I asked her if she wanted to call it a night, she said let’s see what’s around. Nothing was open around the area after we walked a bit. Dropped her off at her car in the busy parking lot, she gave me a glazing look after the hug. Maybe stupidly I said, it’s public here. I was stroking her back for a few seconds and left it at that.
We will see =|

 

[Konada]

First date tonight that owns a $3M+ house. Good body language during our conversations. Toward the end, she said she wanted something to eat, but nothing was open. I asked her if she wanted to call it a night, she said let’s see what’s around. Nothing was open around the area after we walked a bit. Dropped her off at her car in the busy parking lot, she gave me a glazing look after the hug. Maybe stupidly I said, it’s public here. I was stroking her back for a few seconds and left it at that.
We will see =|

I thought it would have been a good excuse invite her over to your place to "make something to eat"

 

[EyeBRollin]

My 1st date to 2nd date ratio was very high. It’s pretty easy if you are properly screening for interest up front.