Would like some thoughts on that situation

[Blacksheep]

So, I went out yesterday to watch a rock band play in a pub. And as I'm not drinking alcohol or going to those places to try to hook up with women, I just let them approach if anyone is interested. And that's what happened yesterday.

I was drinking my water and that woman approached and started to talk with me. I noticed she was getting near and sometimes touching me. So I made my move and we kiss. Then we enjoy the rest of the night together.

Also, there was another girl there, whom I'm going to a barbecue on her parent's farm tonight. My uncle is their friend and I also know them. My uncle's wife tried some weeks ago to persuade me and that girl to talk and date. I was actually interested in her, but since she doesn't talk that much when we texted I just stopped trying (I felt there was no desire on her side). I didn't like that situation because my uncle's wife kind of got in the middle and it seemed forced (like asking if it works, asking for her too). But I noticed that this girl looked at me in a different way than when we met in past situations.

Idk if she saw me kissing this other girl yesterday. But could that in any way raise her interest or could that be weird to meet her at that barbecue tonight?

My theory is that if there was any interest, the fact of my uncle's wife getting in that and suggesting her to talk with me or date with me could have lowered her interest level if there was any.

It sounds very silly to think about that since I'm single and I don't owe anything to anyone. But I would like to hear some thoughts on that.

 

[2Rocky]

Few Questions....

What was the outcome of last night? Phone # ? Future date? Same night lay?

Will the girl you kissed last night be at the farm tonight? (I assume not)

All in all I think it is good you aren't chasing the girl you will see tonight. Be warm with her. Don't bring up the girl you kissed. If she does, say something to the effect of " Eh, we are getting to know each other. I'm looking at other options too" When you say this make eye contact with her, to let HER know she is in the running and better step up her game...IF and that is a big IF...She is interested it may spur on her competitiveness. Or it could have her totally autoreject. At this point there is nothing you can do about that.

If she askes any more about your kiss-girl, change the subject. " I'm here with you, tell me about your place here. Show me around."
Basically anything she asks about the girl, make it about her.

 

[Blacksheep]

Few Questions....

What was the outcome of last night? Phone # ? Future date? Same night lay?

Will the girl you kissed last night be at the farm tonight? (I assume not)

All in all I think it is good you aren't chasing the girl you will see tonight. Be warm with her. Don't bring up the girl you kissed. If she does, say something to the effect of " Eh, we are getting to know each other. I'm looking at other options too" When you say this make eye contact with her, to let HER know she is in the running and better step up her game...IF and that is a big IF...She is interested it may spur on her competitiveness. Or it could have her totally autoreject. At this point there is nothing you can do about that.

If she askes any more about your kiss-girl, change the subject. " I'm here with you, tell me about your place here. Show me around."
Basically anything she asks about the girl, make it about her.

Those are good points! Thanks!

About the questions:

I just got her phone and we will probably have another date.

And I won't go in that farm with this girl I kissed last night. Just me and my uncle/wife.

This girl I'm going to see in that farm, she didn't say hi to me in that pub yesterday. I think she saw me, but we are far away each other. I know she probably saw me going out that place with this other girl.

Im gonna follow the advices you wrote here and I'm not going to force any kind of talk with her. As I also know her parents, I'm gonna try to socialize with everyone there. Her parents also asked me to take my guitar there, so maybe I will play some acoustic songs and have some fun.

The way my uncle's wife tried to force that situation between me and that girl was awkward to me. I hate this kind of thing. I hope she doesn't say anything weird tonight haha.

 

[2Rocky]

Yeah , be warm, return eye contact, have open body language, be approachable.

If your Uncle's wife tries to force anything say in a happy and lighthearted, but confident tone: "Ginger and I have known each other for awhile. We talk every now and then. Thanks!" and go back to what you are doing. It helps take the pressure off of the girl too.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Blacksheep can I ask your nationality and what country you are in? Cultural queues do matter although some may say they do not.

If your family is involved in trying to make the match with girl #2 tread lightly with her because it could have severe repercussions for you with family depending on your culture.

 

[Blacksheep]

Yeah , be warm, return eye contact, have open body language, be approachable.

If your Uncle's wife tries to force anything say in a happy and lighthearted, but confident tone: "Ginger and I have known each other for awhile. We talk every now and then. Thanks!" and go back to what you are doing. It helps take the pressure off of the girl too.

Gonna do that! Thanks man!

 

[Blacksheep]

Blacksheep can I ask your nationality and what country you are in? Cultural queues do matter although some may say they do not.

If your family is involved in trying to make the match with girl #2 tread lightly with her because it could have severe repercussions for you with family depending on your culture.

Im from Brazil. Idk if could be some severe repercussions, but do you know anything like that here in Brazil?

 

[Dr.Suave]

I was actually interested in her, but since she doesn't talk that much when we texted I just stopped trying (I felt there was no desire on her side).

Trying what? To become a text buddy? Just ask her out on a date, bro. If she doesn´t text back, you next her. Keep it simple.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Im from Brazil. Idk if could be some severe repercussions, but do you know anything like that here in Brazil?

it depends how close you are or care about how your family unit responds. I know that Brazil is not exactly a Latin American country but I know that families tend to be tight the same way.

in the end it’s up to you to decide

 

[Blacksheep]

Trying what? To become a text buddy? Just ask her out on a date, bro. If she doesn´t text back, you next her. Keep it simple.

Normally I do that to see if there is any interest in her part, if yes then I invite for a date. If I doesn't see any signal that she might be interested on a date I don't even waste my time inviting.

But it actually might be a good idea to just be direct and invite without much talking.

 

[Murk]

But it actually might be a good idea to just be direct and invite without much talking.

That's always best, if they agree it's because they find you physically attractive and potential to bang/more.

Keep convo brief in these situations.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

If a woman sees you with another woman and you aren't exclusive with that woman it's always a good thing...your value just went up in her eyes, especially if she saw the other woman approach you