Once the respect is gone is there any way to get it back?

[manfrombelow]

We've all been there. My most recent ex would always pick a fight. I remember one morning I was trying to sleep and she kept egging me on over some dumb sh!t. It was literally 30 minutes of me trying to remain calm and telling her "I don't want to do this right now. I'm trying to sleep. Let's talk later." She was recording me the whole time. Now I don't know about you guys, but after 30 minutes of someone egging and trying to get a reaction out of you.. but I eventually gave her one and yelled at her. She then cut the audio to only that part and used it against me. Showed her parents and all her friends, painted me out to be a bad guy. That is the kind of sh!t these women do. You can't win with them. Just eject and move on with your life.

The moment she chose to pick a fight with a recorder in her hand when you're trying to get some sleep, you SHOULD HAVE LEFT THE PLACE RIGHT THERE. Hope you've learned this the hard way man.

 

[bat soup]

So my BPD LTR ended today, posted about it last year and ended up staying with her for another year. I rationalised it by assuming her out of control behaviour was just typical woman stuff and the sex was great, probably the best Ive had so that kept me going.

So normal behaviour for her is starting a fight (usually out of nothing), grabbing all her things (and any gifts she has given me) storming out of the house and going no contact for days sometimes up to a week. I used to call her during these breaks but found out pretty quickly that it just made it worse so now I deal with it by doing nothing and eventually she calls me back pretending nothing happened and nothings wrong. We bang and hang for about another week then she'll start that process again. I could go into details about the BPD craziness but thats not on topic.

Lately its been getting worse, fighting over more stupid **** then usual (thats saying something) and the level of disrespect is getting brutal. Previously I was able to deploy a level of stoicism, grit my teeth and wait for the storm to pass but this new level is starting to get to me. Im losing my ****, yelling back etc and today's breakup was a direct result from that. The question is what to do from here?

Her BPD will force her to reach out eventually but probably not before she starts monkey branching (she ended up ****ing some guy last year after one of these breakups which I forgave as I was doing the same because technically we were broken up). I mean is my standard to low or is this normal woman behaviour?

Is there anyway to get this thing on track or should I just get over it? Its day 1 so Im feeling miserable and if she called now I probably would take her back.

This could be a good thing, if you want to have some action on the side. Every time she goes off, you have the opportunity to bang other women without having to sneak around or feel guilty about it. If you get busted, tell her it's her own fault. The perfect crime.

 

[bat soup]

We've all been there. My most recent ex would always pick a fight. I remember one morning I was trying to sleep and she kept egging me on over some dumb sh!t. It was literally 30 minutes of me trying to remain calm and telling her "I don't want to do this right now. I'm trying to sleep. Let's talk later." She was recording me the whole time. Now I don't know about you guys, but after 30 minutes of someone egging and trying to get a reaction out of you.. but I eventually gave her one and yelled at her. She then cut the audio to only that part and used it against me. Showed her parents and all her friends, painted me out to be a bad guy. That is the kind of sh!t these women do. You can't win with them. Just eject and move on with your life.

Was her name Amber Heard?

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

I have a plate that I’ve been seeing for years, I’ve broken it off with her many times when she engages in behavior I do not like. She crawls back. She’s a stunner to me, great body, great sex, etc. There was a time when I was invested, not any longer, she’s relegated to plate status because of the DHV she gives me and that great sex.

I don’t think she respected me much to start but because I’ve been such a prick to her she has fallen into line, no matter - she stays in her current status because I don’t think there’s a way to make her much more compliant than she is, she respects me as much as she’s capable of now, unfortunately it’s based in the fear of losing me again.

 

[Scars]

In those situations, you cannot win, so don't play the game - walk out.

The moment she chose to pick a fight with a recorder in her hand when you're trying to get some sleep, you SHOULD HAVE LEFT THE PLACE RIGHT THERE. Hope you've learned this the hard way man.

Was her name Amber Heard?

I was hungover and the only thing I had interest in at the time was sleeping. She knew this and used it against me. Also, I had no idea I was being recorded. It was audio on her phone.

But yeah, we broke up shortly after. I ended up kicking her out of my house at 2AM and made her come back the next 2 days to get her stuff.

 

[manfrombelow]

I've learned the hard way that even if the sex is super amazing, it's still not worth your mental health & dignity to keep staying with a crazy chick whose sole hobby is violating your boundaries and making you mentally suffered.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

I was hungover and the only thing I had interest in at the time was sleeping. She knew this and used it against me. Also, I had no idea I was being recorded. It was audio on her phone.

But yeah, we broke up shortly after. I ended up kicking her out of my house at 2AM and made her come back the next 2 days to get her stuff.

Women are fvcking relentless with that shvt. They will bide their time and wait until you're most vulnerable (stressed, hungover, sleep deprived etc) to gain the upper hand.

 

[TheKid]

You cant just love/convince her out of a personality disorder.
But The sex is good: we know, a lot of us have been there ourself.
The sex is good because 1 its the only intimacy they give you, and 2 they use it to control you.
Now ask yourself this. If you didnt crave the sex would you giva?
No so send her to the curb, delete all aspects of her, hit the gym and work on yourself.