Why would a woman ask if you are a player?

[sceneparade]

I was having lunch with a friend of a lady who has shown interest in me. Whilst having lunch, she spoke of news stories back home in Jamaica about a partner of a guy who murdered his mistress.

To cut a long story short, she said Jamaican men have more than one woman on the go at any one time. Whilst smiling at me in a joking way, she then asked me whether I see more than one woman at a time and whether I have flings even when in a relationship. I started laughing, so she assumed I was, and even said "you do". As she was saying this, she was saying it in a teasing/joking way with banter. Essentially, she was asking if I was a player. I felt she was trying to figure me out.

Important to note, she is a lot older than me, but her friend who has shown interest is my age.

Do women typically ask that question for no reason?

Or is she seeking information to pass on to interested friend?

 

[IKO69]

You're in my guy. Pretty much whenever a woman said something like that to me or some variation of "You must get a lot of women" it wasn't long before I was beating in her V.

Edit
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She could've been getting info for her friend. Hang out with them more, it will be revealed in time. The interested one will out herself the more you hang out with her, this has been my experience. Many times they will ask you to hang out with them, but it'll be under the pretense of something like getting coffee, yadda yadda.

 

[sceneparade]

You're in my guy. Pretty much whenever a woman said something like that to me or some variation of "You must get a lot of women" it wasn't long before I was beating in her V.

But who then is interested? Her or her friend that she knows likes me? If it is her, forget it. She is like 40+ years old.

 

[Grounded eagle]

A woman asking you if you are a player is a huge sign of interest.They ask because they’re intimidated by the stiff competition they believe they will face from other girls in being with you.

They may also ask that if they’re feeling insecure about being used and discarded by you.

The one thing that is almost always constant with girls who ask if you’re a player is interest,stemming from your perceived ability to attract and get with multiple women.

It is certainly not unheard of for girls to get their friends to do some reconnaissance for them on a guy they’re interested in. I don’t know if the girl OP wants is doing this or this is all coming from the 40 year old,but there is almost definitely interest somewhere there.

 

[sceneparade]

A woman asking you if you are a player is a huge sign of interest.They ask because they’re intimidated by the stiff competition they believe they will face from other girls in being with you.

They may also ask that if they’re feeling insecure about being used and discarded by you.

The one thing that is almost always constant with girls who ask if you’re a player is interest,stemming from your perceived ability to attract and get with multiple women.

It is certainly not unheard of for girls to get their friends to do some reconnaissance for them on a guy they’re interested in. I don’t know if the girl OP wants is doing this or this is all coming from the 40 year old,but there is almost definitely interest somewhere there.

That is exactly what I thought when she was asking me - that someone was interested.

I doubt it was the lady asking. Reason being is I say 40 to be polite, but she is more likely around 50, so it makes sense her early/middle 30s friend would be interested.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Women say they don't like players but it's funny they always end up dating and fvcking them and then saying they won't do it anymore...

It's like a person who knows smoking is bad for them but they are addicted so they can't quit and keep going back to them

 

[sceneparade]

Women say they don't like players but it's funny they always end up dating and fvcking them and then saying they won't do it anymore...

It's like a person who knows smoking is bad for them but they are addicted so they can't quit and keep going back to them

I can't understand what it is I have done to make them think that. I do talk to a lot of female colleagues, maybe slightly more than guys, but not much. Other times I keep to myself. But I doubt just talking to women would make them think that. Maybe they have met players before who used them and is now scoping me out for player mentality

 

[manfrombelow]

"I don't know, let's find out shall we/why don't you find out yourself?" is my typical & by-default answer to stupid BS questions like this.

 

[Barrister]

Typically, this is a major positive. She is clearly wondering who else is sleeping with you. And to be clear - women want to sleep with a man that other women are sleeping with or are wanting to sleep with. It shows dominance and value all at once.

However - don't give her a straight answer. Give her a little smirk and give her the usual line that you "don't kiss and tell." It will basically confirm you are without giving her a real answer. This is part of the "amused mastery" that women hate but crave all at once out of a man.

 

[manfrombelow]

However - don't give her a straight answer. Give her a little smirk and give her the usual line that you "don't kiss and tell." It will basically confirm you are without giving her a real answer. This is part of the "amused mastery" that women hate but crave all at once out of a man.

Yeah, "Sorry honey but I don't kiss and tell, ever" is an even better response. I learned this from Corey Wayne though, gotta give him credit for that.

Because, this shows you are not the type of guy who brings the subject of how many women you've slept with to every conversation there is, so she can rest assured that he won't do it with her. Discretion, especially in regard to sex, is a quality that is loved by not only women but everybody.

 

[Hal9000]

Yeah its been my experience that when a woman says something about me being a player that she is basically flirting. Despite what they say, women like to be with men who are desireable to other women and will tolerate your player ways to one extent or another.

 

[sceneparade]

Typically, this is a major positive. She is clearly wondering who else is sleeping with you. And to be clear - women want to sleep with a man that other women are sleeping with or are wanting to sleep with. It shows dominance and value all at once.

However - don't give her a straight answer. Give her a little smirk and give her the usual line that you "don't kiss and tell." It will basically confirm you are without giving her a real answer. This is part of the "amused mastery" that women hate but crave all at once out of a man.

Thanks for advice. I did just do smirk/smile in a mischievous way, hence she says I do see with more than one woman at the same time.

 

[Gamisch]

Typically, this is a major positive. She is clearly wondering who else is sleeping with you. And to be clear - women want to sleep with a man that other women are sleeping with or are wanting to sleep with. It shows dominance and value all at once.

However - don't give her a straight answer. Give her a little smirk and give her the usual line that you "don't kiss and tell." It will basically confirm you are without giving her a real answer. This is part of the "amused mastery" that women hate but crave all at once out of a man.

Yes. It's a small shyte test too. A foolish man would try to downplay it ,amd almost be offended. A man on the come up will answer doubtfully but the real player got this question numerous times.

I can't understand what it is I have done to make them think that. I do talk to a lot of female colleagues, maybe slightly more than guys, but not much. Other times I keep to myself. But I doubt just talking to women would make them think that. Maybe they have met players before who used them and is now scoping me out for player mentality

Hmm, I dont like the fact it was a colleague. Be careful not to build a reputation on the job. Women love to talk and gossip.

Do not poop where you eat sir.

 

[Macadellic]

she is a lot older than me

she is more likely around 50

OP,
Players (real ones) don’t have 50 year old plates.

 

[manfrombelow]

View attachment 8665 OP,
Players (real ones) don’t have 50 year old plates.

"50 years old + colleage" sounds like disaster if you ask me. Why do young guys have to learn the hard way that workplace romance never works?

 

[sceneparade]

"50 years old + colleage" sounds like disaster if you ask me. Why do young guys have to learn the hard way that workplace romance never works?

As I stated above, I am not interested in a 50 year old woman lol.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

If an older woman is asking this, she's insecure.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Don’t defecate where you eat man. It never goes well. If a man above you in the corporate chain gets wind of you banging the cuties he whacks off to at home they will also target you.

haters gunna hate

 

[2Rocky]

If an older woman is asking this, she's insecure.

I think she is vetting him for the younger friend.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

I think she is vetting him for the younger friend.

Thx for the correction. Generally, when I get this question being older it's a cue to run some comfort game. In this case, agreed it's vetting and her friend may not actually be insecure. The co-worker could well be covering her ass in case the OP and the friend together and it goes wrong.

But in this case, I'd ask why is this "friend" needing her friends to set her up in today's dating market?