Plate gave bad attitude - I stood my ground! (To be updated)

[manfrombelow]

This is the latest plate that I had sex with on 1st date (please see my older threads).

So far, we have dated three times, all ended with us having wild steamy crazy sex.

However, there's a trait of a (subtle) control freak and bad communicator that I smelled along the way, until today, when our chat went like this:

Plate: "Hey where have you been again (regarding me not replying to an earlier text of hers last night) @manfrombelow? Wanna meet?"

Me: "Of course honey, I've been busy all day. Let's meet at hotel X at Y time"

Plate: "No way, if you want us to go to the hotel every time we meet, this relationship is over" (wow, an ultimatum! And ultimatums are not fun by my standard.)

Me: "I see some troubles in the way you communicate. If you don't like option A that I gave you, you're free to propose option B. You are threatening to end this relationship just because you dislike my date idea? Then I agree with that."

Plate: "I am not feeling comfortable in this relationship (because I almost never engage with her in meaningless chit-chat on a daily basis). If you want to talk about troubles then you should be considerate and respectful about your partner's emotions to see if she's feeling comfortable or not. I see that your date offer doesn't care about my agreement or inputs (she's now trying to make me the bad guy). I'm not threatening (yes she was), I'm feeling insulted (wow? how?) by your offer today" (she forgot her "feelings" are her problems, not mine.)

The old AFC me would have freaked the fvck out and started to apologize and explain and yada-yada and the whole nine yards to "calm her down".

But this is the me of 2022, so I did what 99% of you experienced gentlemen would have done in this BS & drama-filled situation: NO REPLIES.

She's giving bad attitudes aka bad behaviour, so I won't "reward" it by giving her anymore of my attention, at least for now.

I'll keep this thread updated. Thank you all for listening.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Bad attitude is not what this is. It is anti-sloot defense.

She wants more than going to a hotel. She feels like a hooker. The girl let you shoot up the club. She likes you a lot. Take her out on a real date or this one will drop you soon as she finds your replacement.

 

[manfrombelow]

Bad attitude is not what this is. It is anti-sloot defense.

She wants more than going to a hotel. She feels like a hooker. The girl let you shoot up the club. She likes you a lot. Take her out on a real date or this one will drop you soon as she finds your replacement.

I am well aware she wants more than going to a hotel, however, she could have communicated her need in a more well-mannered way instead of throwing an ultimatum. For example "How about we go to ABC for XYZ before going to the hotel then?"

I don't like ultimatums.

And perhaps you didn't really follow what I wrote: We already had three dates before this. It's not like I never took her out on a "real date" before.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

It's not a bad attitude, it's you treating her like she is a wh0re without paying her.

And no woman wants a guy who treats her like she is a wh0re unless it's roleplaying in the bedroom.

This is simply a case of you not being socially in tune with how things work and then taking some "rule" out of context and trying to apply it to the wrong situation.

This is how people screw up what should be months of lays within a few dates.

 

[manfrombelow]

Alright, then how do you guys suggest my next moves then, please?

How should I word my next text?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Alright, then how do you guys suggest my next moves then, please?

How should I word my next text?

I dunno man. It's like you had something so easy that all you had to do is reward her for her good behavior(ie sex 3 dates in a row) once in while and instead you decided to continue to treat her as if all she is is a sex object.

And then somehow you try and act as if she is in the wrong and you are "holding your ground"?

I would probably offer to take her out for something fun like dancing/dinner or something active like hiking or kayaking and maybe a picnic lunch(women love that sh!t) and then don't even go for sex unless she initiates.

That way you show her you don't want her only for sex(even if you do). If you want anything more than a few dates you have to have them at least buy into the are more than a sex object unless you both decide all you want is sex from the other person and that's it.

 

[member160292]

Bad attitude is not what this is. It is anti-sloot defense.

She wants more than going to a hotel. She feels like a hooker. The girl let you shoot up the club. She likes you a lot. Take her out on a real date or this one will drop you soon as she finds your replacement.

Looking back I actually feel bad on how immature I was back then. Just inviting them over and never taking them out on a real date except the first one or two. Contributes to why there aren't many quality women left. Sorry fellas

 

[member160292]

Alright, then how do you guys suggest my next moves then, please?

How should I word my next text?

Just make an excuse that work has you pretty stressed and you want to just chill and relax. Tell it'll ease up soon and give her a date/venue and show her a good time.