I've given a lot of thought to the value of male friends over the years, and I believe they are absolutely essential. With the constant onslaught of feminization that is employed against us in this society from all angles, it is important to have male friends around you that can keep you in a masculine frame of mind. The human mind is extremely malleable, and it is more than possible for a man to move very far away from an Alpha masculine frame of mind, especially when he's involved with and/or living with a woman. In fact, my experience in my divorce practice tells me that men being feminized during marriage is the rule rather than the exception. Typically when a man slogs into my office after a long marriage, he comes in utterly defeated, depressed, and sometimes suicidal, which are all the result of him losing his masculinity long ago.
A lot of my mistakes with women were because I either pushed my Alpha male friends away during the relationship, or I did not not have strong, masculine, Alpha friends around to begin with. When you have Alpha male friends around you, they will not hesitate to tell you when you've become a submissive Beta with a woman you are dating. In fact, they may even enjoy pointing out all the ways you're being submissive. Since the slide into Beta submissiveness is usually gradual, it can be hard for you to recognize when you are sliding into it. But your Alpha male friends on the outside will see the change in your behavior and the dynamic in your relationship very clearly, as they have no emotions invested.
When it comes to other humans in your life, you need to be able to compartmentalize well and be less idealistic. I believe that men bond closely when they go through dangerous, traumatic experiences together, like combat. This is why college fraternities haze, because it is extremely effective in bonding the pledge class together. And, of course, agents of our feminized society will endlessly try to prevent college fraternities from hazing their pledges. I know men that are more than 20 years removed from college, but their core friend group of fraternity brothers has never changed. Most modern men never experience traumatic events together because this world has been made safe and sanitary to the point of absurdity. It is no wonder that men have trouble bonding with each other now.
I would venture to guess that part of the reason you struggle with having male friends is because, 1) They intimidate you in some way or another, and/or 2) You are projecting your weaknesses on them. I struggled with this myself for a long time. Men that don't have strong Alpha male fathers never get comfortable with the constant chiding that groups of Alpha men engage in with each other, nor do they get used to the competition these other men present. The Feminine would have us believe that this chiding is "mean" and causes "hurt feelings". In reality, humans are antifragile and we only improve and grow stronger through hardship, suffering, and trauma. This chiding between men is an evolutionary mechanism to keep everyone in the group strong and on their toes. If you rely on other men in your group to keep you alive, you don't want weak men around and Alpha males will constantly test the other men in the group for weakness.
I currently roughly categorize my male friends as either "Alpha" or "Beta", and our interaction changes based on what category they fall into. Some of my friends are married with children and they are hopelessly Beta, and there is nothing I can do to save them, nor would I even try because it would end our friendship. These Beta friends won't give me straight and raw feedback, as they are more concerned with keeping the peace, avoiding confrontation, and keeping the friendship than delivering the truth to me. They may not even see the truth because, if I'm being a Beta with a woman, they won't even recognize that behavior as being a problem, as they are Beta with their wives every day. These friends are also the more intellectual, introverted men that will discuss philosophy and the meaning of life with me, and I enjoy having these types of friends in my life for many reasons.
My Alpha male friends are far more selfish than the Betas, and I accept this about them. Throughout my life I've played the Beta to some of these Alphas, because being around them brought benefits to my life (usually access to social events and women) I would have not enjoyed alone. I've had several friends like this in the rock bands I've been part of over the years. A rock band is essentially a group of guys that band together in mutual cooperation for the love of music and pursuit of vagina. These Alpha male friends can be real a-holes, and sometimes hard to deal with. However, they are the guys I feel comfortable going into public settings with in order to meet women, as their presence will not diminish my SMV like some of my Beta friends would. They are usually going to give me their honest opinion about my life and any women I am involved with. They are more confident, direct, rude, and opinionated. I probably trust these men less than I would my Beta male friends, as the Alphas pose more of a potential threat and they are more selfish.
So, my point is, that you need male friends in your life, but you also need to be able to compartmentalize your male friends and keep some of them at arm's length. Being idealistic and trying to find the "perfect" male friend or the "perfect" woman will always let you down and lead to disillusionment. Everyone has their plusses and minuses, and you need to be strategic in getting the plusses out of people in your life while avoiding the minuses. You wouldn't go out to meet with women ("sarge") with the Betas for the same reason you would not try to discuss 19th century German philosophy with the Alphas. Further, removing male friends from your life because there are some drawbacks to their personalities is a good recipe to spend your life alone without any male friends. None of your male friends will ever be perfect. With that being said, I have definitely removed a lot of male "friends" from my life when they proved that the cost/benefit analysis of having them in my life was all cost and no benefit.
At this point in my life, I value my friendships with men more than I do any of my interactions with women. The most loyal and enduring relationships in my life have always been with my male friends. In my personal experience with women, and my experience with thousands of women as a divorce lawyer, my conclusion is that women lack the "loyalty gene", especially when it comes to their interactions with men. A man that prioritizes his relationships with women over his male friends will usually end up miserable, depressed, and divorced, wishing he had listened to his "a-hole" Alpha male friends that told him never to marry that *****.
