Seemingly every avenue to meet single women is completely dominated in numbers by men. What am I supposed to do?

[Zimbabwe]

Go on a dating app - 90% male

Any Meetup or local group that I’ve tried - over 90% male

Go to a bar - overflowing with guys

Even tried treating myself at a coffee shop - every table in the building was occupied by one male

You see where I’m going with this. I can’t seem to go anywhere to interact with single women that isn’t absolutely swarming with desperate, lonely, and overly aggressive dudes. And I now live in a city that is supposed to have way more women than men. It just doesn’t make sense, and to be honest, it’s really starting to get under my skin. I want to get back into dating, but there’s no realistic way to do this with these kinds of crazy gender ratios. I wholeheartedly believe in what I have to offer, but I need a chance to be able to show that.

Have other people had this experience?

Does anyone have any advice for how to deal with this?

 

[andreihaha]

What's your goal? What are you looking for?

That's the starting point. You can't make a plan without a purpose.

 

[EyeOnThePrize]

Go on a dating app - 90% male

Any Meetup or local group that I’ve tried - over 90% male

Go to a bar - overflowing with guys

Even tried treating myself at a coffee shop - every table in the building was occupied by one male

You see where I’m going with this. I can’t seem to go anywhere to interact with single women that isn’t absolutely swarming with desperate, lonely, and overly aggressive dudes. And I now live in a city that is supposed to have way more women than men. It just doesn’t make sense, and to be honest, it’s really starting to get under my skin. I want to get back into dating, but there’s no realistic way to do this with these kinds of crazy gender ratios. I wholeheartedly believe in what I have to offer, but I need a chance to be able to show that.

Have other people had this experience?

Does anyone have any advice for how to deal with this?

Dance classes are mainly women, yoga classes are mainly women, hospitals are mainly women, pet shelters are mainly women, the list goes on.

Why would desperate men be a bad thing? They'll make you look great by comparison, you'll stand out in a good way.

When you are in the zone you won't care about other men, they'll be invisible to you. The fact that you see them as a threat shows that you don't feel very confident in your abilities.

Not only are you threatened by them, but you're complaining and lying to yourself that THEY are the reason you're not getting any. I'm guessing female attention validates you more than it should, and as a result you have a toxic dependent relationship with it.

I bet I could show up in your city and get laid the first night. I bet I could get someone else laid the first night I get there. Get out of this shiitty biitchy complainer mindset and embrace the challenges presented to you.

You won't die if it's a dry night, so why act like it? And the more work you put into your body and mind, the easier women become. Sprawl out the honey and let the bees swarm around you.

 

[SW15]

Have other people had this experience?

Does anyone have any advice for how to deal with this?

You're definitely hunting in all the wrong places. Meetup is shiit. Dating apps are shiit.

Dance and fitness classes are often majority female. That's a start. There are fashion and art events that @Solomon frequents. Those are mostly female. You could daygame the streets and parks.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

And yet people still date and bang women all the time...

There might be a lot of quantity but the quality is at an all time low for guys. If you are a quality guy you will not have much of an issue finding women.

 

[Bigpapa]

You are a parrot of your own greatness lol.

Everyone can self improve, but there are actual objective problems meeting women for most men and self improvement will only go so far. But I think you know that.

in theory it should not be a big problem for most men to meet women .

you go to work , you buy good , have a beer after work etc etc . Every time when you are not at home you have the chance of meeting new women

that is why I think that cold approaching is a must

 

[BackInTheGame78]

You are a parrot of your own greatness lol.

Everyone can self improve, but there are actual objective problems meeting women for most men and self improvement will only go so far. But I think you know that.

The number 1 problem for most guys is lack of volume.

 

[Fruitbat]

I went on dating apps. I was overweight at the time and not particularly photogenic.

I had a new date minimum twice a month.

I found the better sites where you have to pay was much better than tinder and the free ones, which were all about looks.

I did, however, spend most evenings messaging. I had maybe a one in 10-15 response rate.

I’d say the responders, one in 3 got to a date. Out of the dates, maybe 1 in 2 got to sechs.

I would add that the moment I gave up PUA game techniques, and presented myself as who I was, the better it got.

You have to accentuate your real strengths.

At first I tried sporty pics and a picture of my nice car/flat. The moment I changed to the real me - a good suit. Blazer and jeans, it changed .

If you can’t pull off bad boy alpha (I can’t), pull off “guy who she would be proud to bring to a party”

OLD gets a bad rap, but as has been established, a lot of guys are here because they don’t know how to talk to women. Especially with written communications, I find this easy.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

In a cafe right now. All guys.

 

[Young OG]

Go on a dating app - 90% male

Any Meetup or local group that I’ve tried - over 90% male

Go to a bar - overflowing with guys

Even tried treating myself at a coffee shop - every table in the building was occupied by one male

You see where I’m going with this. I can’t seem to go anywhere to interact with single women that isn’t absolutely swarming with desperate, lonely, and overly aggressive dudes. And I now live in a city that is supposed to have way more women than men. It just doesn’t make sense, and to be honest, it’s really starting to get under my skin. I want to get back into dating, but there’s no realistic way to do this with these kinds of crazy gender ratios. I wholeheartedly believe in what I have to offer, but I need a chance to be able to show that.

Have other people had this experience?

Does anyone have any advice for how to deal with this?

Stop worrying about other guys. You should be improving yourself so you're better then most guys. If you go somewhere and men out number women then if you're high value then you shouldn't have a problem getting a woman there. For dating apps it's pretty much the same. Improve yourself and you will get more women. Stop worrying about other guys.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

You do realise that you’re a guy…in a cafe. Right?

What if all those other guys are thinking the same thing?

Maybe you should leave the cafe so that there are less guys?

It’s kinda funny to me that guys go to places full of guys and then complain about these guys doing exactly what they are doing.

I’ve a GF already so not that important to me. I came in for a coffee. Just noticed the ratio and posted since the OP mentioned this subject.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Maybe all those other guys have “girlfriends” too and they are just popping in for a quick coffee?

Troll someone else.

 

[Xenom0rph]

For me, the best way to meet new women isn't to go to social meeting spots like night clubs, bars or OLD. It's actually just meeting them during my day-to-day errands like going to the bank, grocery store, cafe, gym, restaurant, etc....

The trick is to become a regular at those places so that people get familiar with seeing you.

The problem, as you mentioned in the OP, is that any place that's meant to be a social meeting spot between men and women will almost certainly be overflowing with men.

But as usual, the deciding factor is how you look and how you present yourself. If you look fit, clean, handsome and appear to have a friendly demeanor then it's much easier to talk to random women.

No way around it, man, you HAVE to look good.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

You’re trolling dude. Half your posts are about how you’ve chosen to work in an industry that is female-ratio-heavy just so you can simp more.

You aren’t above simping, like you pretend to be

Never said I didn’t simp.

 

[member160292]

Maybe stop banging Asian exchange students from coffee meets bagel OP?

NANI?!

 

[sangheilios]

Dance classes are mainly women, yoga classes are mainly women, hospitals are mainly women, pet shelters are mainly women, the list goes on.

Why would desperate men be a bad thing? They'll make you look great by comparison, you'll stand out in a good way.

When you are in the zone you won't care about other men, they'll be invisible to you. The fact that you see them as a threat shows that you don't feel very confident in your abilities.

Not only are you threatened by them, but you're complaining and lying to yourself that THEY are the reason you're not getting any. I'm guessing female attention validates you more than it should, and as a result you have a toxic dependent relationship with it.

Because behavior like this from men results in women becoming pickier and more standoffish. They'll start believing that there aren't any good men that are out there to date, it also doesn't help when all of their female friends are going through the same exact thing, further bolstering these thoughts and feelings. Why do you think OLD sites and apps don't work the vast majority of time? It's because these women are being absolutely bombarded with messages and free validation, regardless of what she even brings to the table, and the result is them becoming impossibly picky.

With male dominated mating environments, such as bars or clubs, you have to stand out significantly to have any chance. There isn't some magic game or strategy, unless you are physically setting yourself apart from the other men you are going to have a hard time in this environment.

The dating game sucks today for the vast majority of men. It has nothing to do with "game" or other such nonsense, it's mostly about being in the right place, at the right time and with the right people.....aka luck. It could be you out shopping and by chance you cross paths with an employee there who asks if you need help and you start a conversation, she's also into you to some degree AND is available/single. That's how most real relationships are formed, it's often through social circles or just random events that occur where the stars basically align.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Hack:
yoga/Pilates class…

Go on a dating app - 90% male

Any Meetup or local group that I’ve tried - over 90% male

Go to a bar - overflowing with guys

Even tried treating myself at a coffee shop - every table in the building was occupied by one male

You see where I’m going with this. I can’t seem to go anywhere to interact with single women that isn’t absolutely swarming with desperate, lonely, and overly aggressive dudes. And I now live in a city that is supposed to have way more women than men. It just doesn’t make sense, and to be honest, it’s really starting to get under my skin. I want to get back into dating, but there’s no realistic way to do this with these kinds of crazy gender ratios. I wholeheartedly believe in what I have to offer, but I need a chance to be able to show that.

Have other people had this experience?

Does anyone have any advice for how to deal with this?

 

[DarwinTaurus]

Go on a dating app - 90% male

Any Meetup or local group that I’ve tried - over 90% male

Go to a bar - overflowing with guys

I feel your pain. In Darwin, historically demographically, there has always been more Men than Women (which goes against the National Demographic), most likely due to Male focused industries such as the Armed Forces and Mining.

Go to a Pub / Club on a busy night between Thursday - Sunday, and the ratio would be Men 55%, Women 45%.

However, it got way WORSE when the American Marines began to be stationed in Darwin. When they were on leave, and hit the town, they would flood the local main street of Darwin where the Bars are, and it would turn into a horrendous C!ck-Fest. I saw my favourite bar turn into 90% men, and10% women. I HATED it, when they were in town. I found them weird in a queer sense also, as they would all dance together.

As an aside, has the American Marines reduced or eliminated any physical restrictions upon enlistment? A vast majority of them I designate as Triple M's... Mexican Midget Marines. Most of them are tiny, and I'm not hugely tall, I'm 5'11". After a few drinks, I've been tempted to drop a smart-arse Star Wars quote to them: "Aren't you a little short for a Stormtrooper"?

 

[andreihaha]

Because behavior like this from men results in women becoming pickier and more standoffish. They'll start believing that there aren't any good men that are out there to date, it also doesn't help when all of their female friends are going through the same exact thing, further bolstering these thoughts and feelings. Why do you think OLD sites and apps don't work the vast majority of time? It's because these women are being absolutely bombarded with messages and free validation, regardless of what she even brings to the table, and the result is them becoming impossibly picky.

That's just more of a reason to become your best self and to differentiate yourself from the others, to be the one that stands out.

 

[Bigpapa]

I think I’m understanding the mindset of guys like OP.

It’s purely this - “I’m annoyed that My simping is ineffective because all other guys are simping too. So I’m going to tie my mind in a pretzel knot and blame other guys and their simping for the reason that my own simping isn’t effective. If I was the only guy who was simping, and these other guys would just get out of my way, then women would finally like me.”

Maybe stop banging Asian exchange students from coffee meets bagel OP? If you want to “feel” good about yourself, then you have to start behaving in a way that, when you look in the mirror, you feel proud of the reflection.

man , I did a social experiment

when women asked me what I do for a living I was telling them that i am an artist , but also have a corporate job to put food on the table

they never really cared about my corporate job ,or how much money I have

the “ I need money to bang because women care about money “ is the biggest simping thing ever

it is true that you need money to have good logistics and a comfortable life , but women are not attracted to money per se , and do not care if you have just a studio apartment or a villa . Or if you drive the latest bmw or a 10 years old one , or if you have a car all together

guys who complain about money , they either target gold diggers ( it can happen ) , they either try to find an excuse that it is not directly about them

“ I am a cool dude bro , but women are just h00kers and interested in the money bro “