Lack of enthusiasm

[European-DJ]

No, am not about to complain about the lack of enthusiasm with modern women, but rather about my own…

I came to this forum 10-12 years ago and it transformed my life into something I could have never imagined. I joined the forum during my last year in high school, right after my first everything (or, not first kiss, but first girlfriend and first lay left me). I was broken and had no idea what to do. I discovered the forum and it made me to who I am today… 90-100 lays later and an income in the higher end of 6-figures (would never have pulled myself together a Uni if it wasn’t for the forum), I am finding a complete lack of enthusiasm about everything…

I just finished a lovely date at a 3-star Michelin restaurant, the girl that went with me is laying here next to me peacefully asleep (thanks @Dr.Suave for the recommendation to invite a girl to whatever you would do anyway)… despite the success of the evening and having done something I always wanted to, I felt absolutely nothing during the entire evening.. nothing about the food, nothing about the wine and nothing about the girl.. ****ing her was like being on autopilot and am worried that I have lost all passion for life…

anyone else been in similar situations and how did you regain your passion for life / enjoying and appreciating the moment that you’re in?

/european

 

[TonyJ78]

Sounds like depression. If that were the case, the last thing I would recommend is medication unless you've exhausted all other possibilities (healthy diet, exercise, limiting alcohol/drug use, etc.). But first I'd ask, are you truly doing what you want to be doing? Are you setting goals to keep working toward, or do you feel like you've already accomplished everything you want to? Has life become about the Game and you've forgotten everything else that it has to offer? This is just for starters.

 

[BadBoy89]

despite the success of the evening and having done something I always wanted to, I felt absolutely nothing during the entire evening.. nothing about the food, nothing about the wine and nothing about the girl.. ****ing her was like being on autopilot and am worried that I have lost all passion for life…

My guess is she is not young / hot enough.

 

[darksprezzatura]

My suggestion would be talk to someone more qualified about this. Doesn't hurt to spend some if you're making bank.

Take care of yourself man, and like anything in life, all phases pass

 

[The Duke]

This has happened to me with two girls I took home and banged on the first date. It boiled down to they just weren't attractive enough and too easy. I never saw either one again. Made sure the next lay was attractive. That did the trick.

 

[Dr.Suave]

Your are welcome bro. Always happy to hear my advice actually helped someone.

Now on to the other stuff:

- Do you have any pets? I watch puppy videos on youtube almost daily, always cheers me up. I bought some dog food and keep it in my car so if I ever pass by a homeless dog I will try to help. I might get a puppy of my own down the road.

- Before I bought my Nume card, I would take some antidepreesants (only to help me sleep) most nights. Only took prescription or medicine when I had to get up really early, otherwise I would take natural antidepressants (Valeriana, Paziflora, and there are others but I dont remember the names). If you have money to spare you could try the nume card. If its not your thing maybe try some natural antidepressants. If nothing else works you can alway try talking to a therapist.

 

[Serenity]

@TonyJ78 is asking the right question, are you truly doing what you want to be doing?

I have experienced the same, the emptiness. I absolutely sucked with women, learned a bunch from this forum (and other places) and managed to make effective use of it. I thought I had it figured out, I thought I did the right things, the things I was supposed to do to get a better life. Ultimately I was no happier than before, the only difference was that I knew how to get laid.

I would sometimes spend entire days reflecting on why the hell it didn't scratch the itch I felt and after a while I realized what I was doing wrong. I was looking for external ways to attain happiness, I was trying to suck it from everywhere else, but where does it come from if that's what everyone is doing? I was looking in the wrong place, I was looking beyond myself when it was within me all the time. I could be a source of it instead of a leech expecting the world to entertain me.

Women can't bring happiness, they can only enhance it if you already have it. Money has severely diminishing returns in terms of happiness, at some point more just becomes a "nice to have" and anything you buy only provides a fleeting sense of happiness.

I felt the way I felt about what I was doing, going through women. It didn't make me happier, so in what damn reality was it rational to continue? I thought it was rational to chase what turned out to be a mirage of success, to be the lady magnet, but fvcking why? Hey guys, look at me, I have it all figured out. Oh, ok, cool bro, whatever. Yeah, that's all there is to it, a vain and hollow attempt at living the good life.

One day I took a long hard look at myself and said fvck it to everything that didn't bring me value, I impress nobody and I just don't care. I was never at the level of 6 figures, 100 lays and eating fancy food at 3-star Michelin restaurants. It means nothing to me, all I want is a good time, to fvck around with whatever interest me at a given time and to have some damn fun.

Life is too short to be around the 100th lay and not enjoy it, so why the hell are you doing it? Why do you restrict yourself to a path in life that clearly doesn't serve you? It's literally irrational, yet so so many fall into this trap. Most of the time it's people trying to live up to ideals that don't line up with their true desires, often someone else's definition of success. To listen to your heart and make decisions that will make you feel good right now, tomorrow and years from now is a very different way to live.

It seems to me you're one of many victims of the pressures in society. Get good at attracting women, make a bunch of money, get everything you materially desire and then what? That's where you are now, lost, empty, hollow. You took care of business, but did you really take care of your heart?

All the questions I have posed are worth reflecting upon. Don't answer me, answer yourself.