Why you shouldn't move to a city/place for women and game.

[Jesse Pinkman]

So its been a bit and I get back to Miami at the end of the month. Still, I wanted to share something I have seen guys do or seriously wonder about doing: Moving to a different city or country for the sole reason of having a better dating/sex life. In my years in NYC, I saw it all the time. Lots of west coast techies leaving their sausagefest cities just to come to NYC because some guy just had to release a gender ratios study on how NYC is overflowing with single women. Almost every single guy I knew that did this struggled massively in NYC (more on that later) and quite a few ended up going back altogether.

In fact, most of the times when I have seen guys move to a different city or even country solely for the purposes of game, it has ended in them being miserable and not really doing all that well. Now that isn't to say that some places like say some small bible belt town where everyone is married by 22 is doable for game but that's more of an extreme example. Here are a few reasons as to why you should not move to a city or place for women and game reasons.

If guys are raving about it, it's probably already well past its prime.

If you just happen to hear about a city or place being great for single guys on a PUA Forum, some random web article, or something of the sort; it's too late bro. By now, almost all spammy Pickup Artists, desperate simps, and hordes of single men have flooded the place. At this point, the ratios are either even or even skewing more towards single men being more common. In most major US cities, even NYC, under the age of 40 single men outnumber single women by a lot. After 2015 or so, I noticed that more and more NYC bars started becoming sausagefests because guys flooded into the city solely for the purpose of meeting women.

It probably is you to a degree than the city.

Unless you are in some small flyover city where women get married by 22 or some uber religious area where you can be in serious danger for sleeping around, it's probably you. If you are in a spot with over 100k people in it, then there are some available women to go around that are decent looking and cool. I have never seen a case where a guy struggled a ton in one major city but then somehow turned it around in another major city, it just doesn't happen. As bad as San Francisco or Seattle might be, I have known guys who did well in NYC also do well enough in those cities. If you are not in shape and are always the pessimistic black pill type, don't expect your results to change much.

There are other parts to your new home that will make life even more difficult.

Learning a new language perhaps, maybe higher taxes, higher cost of living, and you name it. The guys who moved to NYC were overtaken by the higher cost of living, how quickly things moved, how rude the people could get, and the harsh winters that happened. Even if the ratios are slightly better, the other X factors in a city get in your way to the extent that it almost doesn't matter how many single women there are.

So when should you move cities and why should you decide on a city?

You should move if even outside of game, you are miserable in your current city. Maybe you don't like country music that much and you are stuck in Nashville. Maybe your Spanish sucks, you aren't a fan of Latin culture, and you are stuck in Miami. You should decide your future home on what you like in a city and then let the rest work itself out. For example, my friend is a techie who is into coffee culture, he moved to Seattle and has dated a number of cute girls there. It is doable because you will be naturally happy regardless of game and women will want to be around you more. Almost all major cities have enough attractive women in them.

 

[Epicwinguy]

But if you live in a rural area you should definitely move to an urban area

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

I agree and this is coming from someone that benefitted from moving to another city. I couldn't get dog shvt in Nashville because unless you are on the Titans, it's hard for a black man up there. In Texas, my dating life is sooooo much better lol. However, I did not leave Nashville solely because of pvssy, there were many other things that I hated about living there. People always complain about where they live and remain to stay, but here are the two things that made me realize that I had to escape my city.

1). My number one priority was to GTFO, I breathed it, It was constantly on my mind. If I was to just randomly get 5k, I would've quit my job and left town lol. As soon as my former company went remote due to the pandemic, I left ASAP, I didn't care if they were going to call me back into the office because I made a plan to leave that company once I found another job in my new city.

2). I literally had no desire to live in the nicest/best parts of the city. I turned down a 200k job by my family member to keep me in Nash because that felt like a prison sentence to me. I knew I would never be truly happy there regardless of my compensation, relationship status, and etc.

 

[SW15]

most of the times when I have seen guys move to a different city or even country solely for the purposes of game, it has ended in them being miserable and not really doing all that well.

I mentioned this in the Dallas thread. I wouldn't recommend living in Dallas for mating purposes. It's a tough area for mating purposes. There are worse though.

There are other elements that make living in Dallas worthwhile from my vantage point. The mating environment is merely adequate.

A lot of the transplants to DFW in the past 10-15 years have been married couples heading to the suburbs.

It probably is you to a degree than the city.

If you are in a spot with over 100k people in it, then there are some available women to go around that are decent looking and cool.

To me, 100-150k population is the point where a metro area becomes feasible for dating, depending upon the area's overall demographics. When an area is below that population level, it is generally a pusssy wasteland for men age 25+. If you want to live in a small town, you better have a secure relationship. I believe the vast majority of romantic relationships are transient and have a shelf life of goodness. I could not live in a small town below 100-150k now.

I have never seen a case where a guy struggled a ton in one major city but then somehow turned it around in another major city, it just doesn't happen.

I have never seen this happen either.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Omaha and Boise didn't work out?

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

And I’ve lived in a small town before and that was one of the worst dating experiences of my life. Y’all are on crack to be promoting a small town as an ideal dating environment lol.

 

[Who Dares Win]

The more I read your posts and the more I'm glad I'm no longer forced to live in London.

That city ages you for the simple fact of living there, living costs are a drain, crime rate getting closer to caracas but on a crappy weather.

Also probably the worse city to meet women wheter you look for a relationship or a one night stand.

Unless you're a gay guy into ethnics or a middle aged overweight woman avoid it at all costs.

Glad Britain gtfo from EU and many offices relocated.

The only big city I liked to live on was St. Petersburg, weather sucked but amazing costs/services ratio, women were hot and pleasable to deal with....ofc WWIII had to happen rght before spring.

 

[SW15]

And I’ve lived in a small town before and that was one of the worst dating experiences of my life. Y’all are on crack to be promoting a small town as an ideal dating environment lol.

No one is promoting a small town. The move from an area of 100,000 population or less to a bigger area can positively impact one's dating life. A mid-sized city to a big city for dating purposes usually won't fix the problem.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

No one is promoting a small town. The move from an area of 100,000 population or less to a bigger area can positively impact one's dating life. A mid-sized city to a big city for dating purposes usually won't fix the problem.

Yeah not targeting you, but I’ve seen it praised here sometimes lol. I think there’s pros and cons to every size and depends on what you would rather deal with. For me, I’m not a big fan of single moms and racism because I’m black so I much prefer the large cities.

Yeah, you deal with less bs and competition in smaller cities, but most of the women are pregnant by 21 and you have to deal with that Fraternal High School Sports bar grill culture lol.

 

[Tilex]

The dating market of a city is also a reflection of the job market.
People need to do their homework and check the unemployment rates for the city and the state.

A cutthroat market will lead to people backstabbing & robbing each other.
Women would it make it extremely for guys to get close to them in this market.

 

[Jesse Pinkman]

I agree and this is coming from someone that benefitted from moving to another city. I couldn't get dog shvt in Nashville because unless you are on the Titans, it's hard for a black man up there. In Texas, my dating life is sooooo much better lol. However, I did not leave Nashville solely because of pvssy, there were many other things that I hated about living there. People always complain about where they live and remain to stay, but here are the two things that made me realize that I had to escape my city.

1). My number one priority was to GTFO, I breathed it, It was constantly on my mind. If I was to just randomly get 5k, I would've quit my job and left town lol. As soon as my former company went remote due to the pandemic, I left ASAP, I didn't care if they were going to call me back into the office because I made a plan to leave that company once I found another job in my new city.

2). I literally had no desire to live in the nicest/best parts of the city. I turned down a 200k job by my family member to keep me in Nash because that felt like a prison sentence to me. I knew I would never be truly happy there regardless of my compensation, relationship status, and etc.

Wait so what made you hate Nashville so much?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

If you do anything explicitly "for a woman" you have already lost. Whatever you decide to do it should be for YOU and YOU only. If it has added benefits for women then great but that shouldn't be a concern.

Too many guys do ridiculous things for women then wonder why it never seems to work. I mean someone seriously is going to move because they think they need to do that so they can get a woman? I've got news for you. If you can't get them wherever you are at now you very likely won't get them wherever you are moving either. The problem isn't where you are at, the problem is you.

Because it's a supplicating move and if you supplicate to the degree that you make life decisions because you think that's what women want, you will make them in every aspect and interaction you have with them.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Wait so what made you hate Nashville so much?

1). I'm from there and the people that I knew that remained there were extremely toxic and not going anywhere in life. I also found it hard to relate to anyone new because they were on the Nashville Kool-Aid due to relocating from BFE Iowa or something lol.

2). Never vibed with the culture, weather, and the insane cost of living was annoying. Nashville has become a really expensive city.

3). There's not much to do for the price you pay. You will not go to Broadway every weekend and the areas like the Gulch/west area get old fast. East Nashville is small and just a cope excuse lol.

4). The job market & pay is trash unless you got relocated there within your company. My friend was an engineer and I was making 2k more than him lol with my finance job I was trying to leave for more pay. I couldn't find another job because I would've had to take a pay bump.

5). The people have that LA snobby arrogance for some reason. People in Nashville like to compare it to cities like NYC but it's really on the same level as Columbus, Ohio and Indianapolis, Indiana when it comes to population.

These points seem short and simple, but I was stuck there for 4 long years of hell and thank god the pandemic gave me an opportunity to leave. Now I make six figs and don't live in an utter shvt hole anymore lol.

 

[AureliusMaximus]

So its been a bit and I get back to Miami at the end of the month. Still, I wanted to share something I have seen guys do or seriously wonder about doing: Moving to a different city or country for the sole reason of having a better dating/sex life. In my years in NYC, I saw it all the time. Lots of west coast techies leaving their sausagefest cities just to come to NYC because some guy just had to release a gender ratios study on how NYC is overflowing with single women. Almost every single guy I knew that did this struggled massively in NYC (more on that later) and quite a few ended up going back altogether.

In fact, most of the times when I have seen guys move to a different city or even country solely for the purposes of game, it has ended in them being miserable and not really doing all that well. Now that isn't to say that some places like say some small bible belt town where everyone is married by 22 is doable for game but that's more of an extreme example. Here are a few reasons as to why you should not move to a city or place for women and game reasons.

If guys are raving about it, it's probably already well past its prime.

If you just happen to hear about a city or place being great for single guys on a PUA Forum, some random web article, or something of the sort; it's too late bro. By now, almost all spammy Pickup Artists, desperate simps, and hordes of single men have flooded the place. At this point, the ratios are either even or even skewing more towards single men being more common. In most major US cities, even NYC, under the age of 40 single men outnumber single women by a lot. After 2015 or so, I noticed that more and more NYC bars started becoming sausagefests because guys flooded into the city solely for the purpose of meeting women.

It probably is you to a degree than the city.

Unless you are in some small flyover city where women get married by 22 or some uber religious area where you can be in serious danger for sleeping around, it's probably you. If you are in a spot with over 100k people in it, then there are some available women to go around that are decent looking and cool. I have never seen a case where a guy struggled a ton in one major city but then somehow turned it around in another major city, it just doesn't happen. As bad as San Francisco or Seattle might be, I have known guys who did well in NYC also do well enough in those cities. If you are not in shape and are always the pessimistic black pill type, don't expect your results to change much.

There are other parts to your new home that will make life even more difficult.

Learning a new language perhaps, maybe higher taxes, higher cost of living, and you name it. The guys who moved to NYC were overtaken by the higher cost of living, how quickly things moved, how rude the people could get, and the harsh winters that happened. Even if the ratios are slightly better, the other X factors in a city get in your way to the extent that it almost doesn't matter how many single women there are.

So when should you move cities and why should you decide on a city?

You should move if even outside of game, you are miserable in your current city. Maybe you don't like country music that much and you are stuck in Nashville. Maybe your Spanish sucks, you aren't a fan of Latin culture, and you are stuck in Miami. You should decide your future home on what you like in a city and then let the rest work itself out. For example, my friend is a techie who is into coffee culture, he moved to Seattle and has dated a number of cute girls there. It is doable because you will be naturally happy regardless of game and women will want to be around you more. Almost all major cities have enough attractive women in them.

Never move your butt for the sake of a girl (or girls), move your butt for yourself because it makes you happy.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Never move your butt for the sake of a girl (or girls), move your butt for yourself because it makes you happy.

I can't believe there are people willing to move to a third-world country for pvssy lol.

 

[Travel memoir21]

I'm literally at a third world country right now typing this ( The Philippines).

Came here to visit friends and family and check out my family hotel business. I was meeting girls in the states when I can drive and cruise. If I meet a girl here, that would also be fine with me.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

It depends where you are and who you are. Your look, money, or status could be rock bottom in LA but mid range elsewhere. You might have a look that is more in vogue certain places and less so others. You might find it easy to find someone but hard to find quality in one place, or hard to find anyone but surrounded by quality in another. NYC will always be better than most cities.

What’s a bad LA look?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

1). I'm from there and the people that I knew that remained there were extremely toxic and not going anywhere in life. I also found it hard to relate to anyone new because they were on the Nashville Kool-Aid due to relocating from BFE Iowa or something lol.

2). Never vibed with the culture, weather, and the insane cost of living was annoying. Nashville has become a really expensive city.

3). There's not much to do for the price you pay. You will not go to Broadway every weekend and the areas like the Gulch/west area get old fast. East Nashville is small and just a cope excuse lol.

4). The job market & pay is trash unless you got relocated there within your company. My friend was an engineer and I was making 2k more than him lol with my finance job I was trying to leave for more pay. I couldn't find another job because I would've had to take a pay bump.

5). The people have that LA snobby arrogance for some reason. People in Nashville like to compare it to cities like NYC but it's really on the same level as Columbus, Ohio and Indianapolis, Indiana when it comes to population.

These points seem short and simple, but I was stuck there for 4 long years of hell and thank god the pandemic gave me an opportunity to leave. Now I make six figs and don't live in an utter shvt hole anymore lol.

Virtually everywhere has become a really expensive city now

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Virtually everywhere has become a really expensive city now

Yeah, but it’s completely insane in Nashville. I moved in 2020 and my old apartment that was 20 mins from the city went from 900 a month to 1600. Nothing really outstanding about the area, just right at the end of the metro county border with a Publix grocery store nearby. Nashville has become an overpriced cope haven for Midwestern and Yankee escapees lol.