Dating in your 40's...the women are bat s crazy

[Chuck Taylor]

The older you get, the easier it is to see a person’s issues in their photographs. At 64 I can easily and I instinctively recognize a woman’s personality traits from her photos. Men tend to think they stop learning and refining at an early age, but in fact, the instinct and knowledge one gains as they get older is unimaginable in their younger years (14 to around 40 roughly).
From age 40 on, refined knowledge starts to become unhidden.

But the younger man “knows” that what I just said can’t be true.

One of my favorite quotes - "In youth, we learn; in age, we understand."

 

[SW15]

Usually the ones that are childless are either the career women

the career women it is because they live in a very anxious environment ( no matter how they look like ) . And usually are quite annoying to have them around

If a woman is childless and not in an LTR/married once she turns 30, it is likely that she is a career oriented woman. Even the 30+ year old women in multi-year LTRs without being married and childless are likelier to have a strong career orientation.

I'm not sure why career women live an anxious environment. Women are less likely to be layoff victims in white collar work than men. They also receive preferential hiring treatment compared to White men. If career women live in an anxious environment, it is because they are going against their own natural femininity. It is best for women to embrace their feminine qualities. Careers are not feminine.

And usually are quite annoying to have them around

So true. It can sometimes be difficult to determine if a woman 30+ is a careerist from her title or not. Women in a management role are definitely careerist. The ones who work white collar jobs but are non-managerial are more difficult to judge. Some might be aspiring towards management. Women in traditional female occupations are more likely to be more feminine. Those women would be less annoying in interactions.

Majority of single moms don’t want to date a dude with kids because it takes away from potential resources from HER kids.

Have not found this to be true at all. In fact this has never been brought up. Actually the opposite, they are happy to have someone who understands what they go through with kids.

This is a situation where people making up theories in their own mind they think logically make sense and reality of what actually happens are completely opposite.

While I still find it troubling that a lot of older childless men are thirsty and end up with single moms, I don't agree that single moms as a whole prefer childless men. I would see this issue closer to the way that @BackInTheGame78 sees it.

As I said earlier, childless men and single moms are a bad combination. A lot of childless men do whatever they can to avoid dating single moms, though some might use a single mom for short term sex. For childless men, if they desire any sort of longevity with women, they'll strongly prefer a childless women because of the more similar lifestyle and attitudes. I'd still rather a mid to late 30s childless women than a single mom of the same age. Both will have baggage, but the childless woman's baggage is more manageable.

However, the baggage may not be easy to manage. She may have multiple pets (some similarity to a single mom), she may be a careerist, etc. Women seem to get pets to substitute for children. In the Millennial generation, female fertility is low but dog & cat ownership rates are so much higher. Additionally, the way that the Millennials have acquired pets has been different than it was done prior to the Millennials reaching adulthood in large numbers starting around the late 2000s. When the Boomers and most of Gen X got pets, it was after they were married, had the house in the suburbs, and often had children at home. That's why the "cat woman" phenomenon was so unique years ago, it was a different path. Millennial women started getting pets as single women in their early to mid 20s in the late 2000s and during the 2010s.

 

[Bigpapa]

I'm not sure why career women live an anxious environment. Women are less likely to be layoff victims in white collar work than men. They also receive preferential hiring treatment compared to White men. If career women live in an anxious environment, it is because they are going against their own natural femininity. It is best for women to embrace their feminine qualities. Careers are not feminine.

because the corporate environment is a very sh1t place to be . Full of double standards etc

no one working for a corporation is happy about working there . They all come for the money , and will do whatever it takes to keep getting the money . That is when you see all the bad things surfacing

have you ever seen someone happy working for a corporation ?

 

[Dr.Suave]

Have not found this to be true at all. In fact this has never been brought up. Actually the opposite, they are happy to have someone who understands what they go through with kids.

This is a situation where people making up theories in their own mind they think logically make sense and reality of what actually happens are completely opposite.

What? But all single moms in my social circle have childless boyfriends. Maybe its a location thing?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

What? But all single moms in my social circle have childless boyfriends. Maybe its a location thing?

Small sample size most likely. How many women in your social circle versus how many single Moms in total out there.

 

[jnMissouri]

The older you get, the easier it is to see a person’s issues in their photographs. At 64 I can easily and I instinctively recognize a woman’s personality traits from her photos. Men tend to think they stop learning and refining at an early age, but in fact, the instinct and knowledge one gains as they get older is unimaginable in their younger years (14 to around 40 roughly).
From age 40 on, refined knowledge starts to become unhidden.

But the younger man “knows” that what I just said can’t be true.

You’ve made up something in your mind to can’t prove. If you’re assessing a woman’s issues by her photos (scientifically impossible) and pass on her, how do you have any confirmation that your assessment was accurate?

If you really think you can spot crazy from simple photos you need help.

 

[jnMissouri]

That was the case with both of my cousins and their divorces.



I've met some awkward 35-50 year old men who were never married and childless. I haven't met the suave, player type too much in this age bracket. They are out there. A couple are on this board.




I agree with the statement. Part of why older, childless are less in demand is because they've changed. The 35-40 year old beta male of today is less inspiring than the 35-40 year old beta male of 2000, a mere 22 years ago. Remember, most men are beta males.

Women do have a preference for older guys who have a divorce to their name in a lot of cases.

If you are a 35+ never married, childless man today, you can be successful, but you need a strong frame. Women will either assume you are a player or awkward. If you don't come off of a player, you have to prove you aren't awkward.

You're better off being a perceived as a player than as a non-player as a never married, childless guy if you're older.

I met this attractive girl for bubble tea last night, brought her home and ****ed her twice. Made out with her at the table in the venue. No awkwardness. What I get from most women being a successful, educated, never married and childless guy is “you’re too good to be true”.

 

[jnMissouri]

Childless men and single moms are a bad combo. A lot of older childless men are thirsty and end up with single moms though.

I couldn't date a single mom. The lifestyle is too different for me. Many women close to my late 30s age are single moms. The baggage that a mid to late 30s childless woman has is still preferable to a single woman in many cases.

I know a lot of gurus say not to date single moms, but I’m not marrying these women.I would have passed up a lot of hot ass if I didn’t date single moms. Nothing wrong with it imo. Just don’t get married.

 

[jnMissouri]

Honestly I don't date women without kids because I have kids and I don't think they can relate. And you are right, it definitely says something not good regarding them if they don't by that age. Unlike most people on here I see nothing wrong with dating single Moms.

The women who are in their 40’s, sometimes mid, who have never been married and have no kids but want them are absolutely nuts. I met one such girl online recently who is a Dr. but fails to understand the risks of having children at her age. Birth defect city.

And she won’t agree to exclusivity without marriage. Sorry but without a trial period to see if you can be faithful, I’ll pass…

I’m passing in general. I almost married my last gf, 4 karat 51k ring shopping. She turned out to be nuts, a liar and manipulator. About stupid small stuff. But it ruined my trust. Renewed my desire never to get married or have kids.

 

[Bigpapa]

“you’re too good to be true”.

That is why it is important to show some flaws , otherwise people will despise you for being what they could be but decided not to be

being a corporate guy you know very well that for example you do not like guys that are way better than you job wise , because you know that they can pose a threat

Medium smart to smart is ok , too smart is not ok

 

[PRW63]

Yep, my multi millionaire butt is the problem, not the women who are hot and never married and childless or have three divorces behind them by 40. GENIUS!!!

BadBoy89 is probably got a point. You accused him of being a Troll which I doubt he is, but my first thought when reading your original post was that you are a contributor to your own problem, Like attracts like. Drama filled people attract drama filled people. It's the whole birds of a feather thing. When an OP lashes out at someone suggesting such,...it is a red flag. Anyone posting thier problems here should have already aknowledged that they may be their own problem. When an OP has to refer to themselves as "my multi millionaire butt" is also showing red flags. There is no way you can prove you are a multi millionaire to us. It shows you are using it to compensate (I obviously know what I am doing because I am rich), Even if you are such, it doesn't make a guy smarter or better with women, it just means he can afford to keep making the same screw ups over and over while a guy with less money cannot. If Elon Musk came here complaining about women I'd tell him the same thing.

 

[Robert28]

Small sample size most likely. How many women in your social circle versus how many single Moms in total out there.

You must not live in the south because single moms are 3 out of every 5 women around here. And that’s me estimating low.

 

[PRW63]

You must not live in the south because single moms are 3 out of every 5 women around here. And that’s me estimating low.

I'm my social circles it is 98.5% single grandmothers
One just survived a heartattack about 2 months ago.

 

[Robert28]

I met this attractive girl for bubble tea last night, brought her home and ****ed her twice. Made out with her at the table in the venue. No awkwardness. What I get from most women being a successful, educated, never married and childless guy is “you’re too good to be true”.

I’m just going to give you advice as one dude looking out for another. Be EXTREMELY careful with this “you’re too good to be true” stuff women are throwing at you. The few times I’ve encountered such a compliment, the women (one especially) was a master manipulator. The compliment was said to make you let your guard down and not be on edge looking for red flags. It wasn’t said to make you feel good about yourself. Soon as I hear stuff like that my radar goes PING!

 

[PRW63]

I’m just going to give you advice as one dude looking out for another. Be EXTREMELY careful with this “you’re too good to be true” stuff women are throwing at you. The few times I’ve encountered such a compliment, the women (one especially) was a master manipulator. The compliment was said to make you let your guard down and not be on edge looking for red flags. It wasn’t said to make you feel good about yourself. Soon as I hear stuff like that my radar goes PING!

Yea, that is classic narcissistic manipulation.

 

[Slowhandluke]

One of my favorite quotes - "In youth, we learn; in age, we understand."

After years and years of having friends and seeing where their lives end up.. where they are from, their actions and consequences... It's hard NOT to see the patterns of life if you are old enough. Hell, if not the patterns in their lives, but patterns in our own lives and how things come to pass because of our actions. It's crazy, but wisdom is a "thing".

Now a days, I can see a young person, talk to him, and think to myself, "this guy is like my friend Dave, twenty years ago. This is where he's likely going to end up 20 years from now because this is what happened to Dave (and perhaps, larry,etc).

Patterns repeat themselves. Young people don't have that experience; it requires empathy and not too many young people have empathy. I sometimes feel that I'm Yoda. It's like "you are a dumbass... and forever, you shall be a dumbass.. now I'm leaving this bar table to talk to someone else"; or sometimes I think to myself, "dude, this guy is going to be successful. I hope him success, but he's not going to need it; he can make it by himself".

Am I full of myself? Maybe, but that's how I feel. See enough people.. have enough friends.. meet enough people... you can see the patterns if you live long enough to see their "stories".

You’ve made up something in your mind to can’t prove. If you’re assessing a woman’s issues by her photos (scientifically impossible) and pass on her, how do you have any confirmation that your assessment was accurate?

If you really think you can spot crazy from simple photos you need help.

I disagree.. Photos can tell a lot; how have they decided to pose? What are they wearing? Are they smiling? Who are they with? How attractive or unattractive are they, etc... One may not be 100% accurate, but with enough practice.. the ability to guess what a person is like by their photograph increases. This is what a lot of fortune tellers / card readers do. They closely examine the person and try to figure out what the person is all about. Can they 100% read the future, not really.. but they make rather good guess about the personality they are dealing with.

 

[SW15]

I know a lot of gurus say not to date single moms, but I’m not marrying these women.I would have passed up a lot of hot ass if I didn’t date single moms. Nothing wrong with it imo. Just don’t get married.

Yes, it is possible to bang a single mom either one night or over a short period of time. I would imagine it would be a royal pain to schedule anything with them. That's already challenging enough with childless women.

 

[Atom Smasher]

You’ve made up something in your mind to can’t prove. If you’re assessing a woman’s issues by her photos (scientifically impossible) and pass on her, how do you have any confirmation that your assessment was accurate?

If you really think you can spot crazy from simple photos you need help.

I have no desire to “prove” anything. I just pass on what I’ve learned in life to whomever has an ear to hear.
There are multiple subtle tells in a person’s features which are caught in photos and which betray certain personality characteristics. This is too subtle for the young and for older know-it-alls.
I will give you an example which is ridiculously obvious but which you may understand…The wide-eyed stare. Most men of knowledge recognize that as a sign of crazy.
Another very obvious one would be an uneven smile. Sort of a smirk. That should tell an intelligent man many things.
One can start there but take it to a more micro level after years of experience and observation. That awareness increases as a man gains insight over the years. Put another way, it’s simply an advanced ability to read body language and micro-tells.
I know this falls on deaf ears for some, but many older men understand what I’m talking about.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

This is why I would always target younger than my most recent ex every time I was single. My ex is 32 so last time I was single I was targeting 31 and lower.

Im 35 now. Not looking forward to dealing with crazies like OP describing, so I might just as well settle down with my current gf and get out of the game. At least for a few years/decades. Maybe even have a kid.

Why aren't you targeting far younger early 20s? I got a throater in a parking lot. Girl was mid 20s. I still should go younger. Settling down is looking great for Will Smith.

 

[SoSuave666]

I have no desire to “prove” anything. I just pass on what I’ve learned in life to whomever has an ear to hear.
There are multiple subtle tells in a person’s features which are caught in photos and which betray certain personality characteristics. This is too subtle for the young and for older know-it-alls.
I will give you an example which is ridiculously obvious but which you may understand…The wide-eyed stare. Most men of knowledge recognize that as a sign of crazy.
Another very obvious one would be an uneven smile. Sort of a smirk. That should tell an intelligent man many things.
One can start there but take it to a more micro level after years of experience and observation. That awareness increases as a man gains insight over the years. Put another way, it’s simply an advanced ability to read body language and micro-tells.
I know this falls on deaf ears for some, but many older men understand what I’m talking about.

I had this at such a young age. I don’t think it’s wisdom/age although I think it can manifest itself that way. Rather I think it’s just being around a lot of women in general.