OLD - Agreed Upon Meetup, After Some Drag Time

EyeBRollin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 18, 2015
Messages
10,688
Reaction score
8,630
Age
35
Update:

So she will be returning from Florida on Saturday after a week of being there, and in total Saturday will be two weeks of chatting via OLD.

We have chatted each day since I approached on Hinge. It began with 4-5 messages a day but over the last week with her on vacation it has been more less 2 messages each day. I’ve also opted not to ask for the number thus far as I’m operating under the notion that it may add a more confident impression, admittedly though I could be wrong, and plan to ask for it in order to coordinate our meetup.

Now she has agreed to meet Saturday although her response says “should be able to make that work” (see image). Of course it looks ok but I’m curious to know whether I should bend out of frame here to accommodate to her other evening plans at 7pm.

I’ve read quite a few threads that mention presenting a take it or leave it mindset, which would mean scrubbing the meeting altogether and giving her the .. "I'd love to meet you but If you can't commit to a specific time now, just get back to me when you know your schedule becomes clear and we can try again then."

Would enjoy hearing some other perspective on this situation and whether I should proceed with working around her plans. Also I think it’s worth mentioning that she recently updated her Hinge profile, which can be indicative of wanting to seek out new options. Furthermore our text frequency has dropped quite a bit over the last two days, with now only about 1 message each day. I’m getting the impression she’s playing the field, which I guess should have been assumed from the beginning.
Abort. Never ask a woman on a date when she already has other plans. Either she drops the plans for you or pick a different day.

Also, do not ask these broads for Friday or Saturday evening. You are supposed to be banging your other hves on those days.

Dude, back out of Saturday- something came up. Reschedule her for earlier in the week Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday. Also, make concrete plans. None of those I “should be able to do it.”

Phone number is irrelevant for getting a date. Get the date confirmed first. Then leave her your number to reach you. She will text you hers before the date or you can get it on the date.
 

Pierce Manhammer

Moderator
Joined
Jun 2, 2021
Messages
5,026
Reaction score
6,030
Location
PRC
Well at the risk of being crude, looks for signs of her vulva being nice and plump and swollen. Likewise if she turns you down for sechs it’s a red flag. Yeesh.
 

SH03C

Don Juan
Joined
May 16, 2019
Messages
133
Reaction score
56
Post Mortem:

The date could have went better. The conversation was very fluid and lasted for about 2.5 hours, which was a bit beyond her 7pm plans.

Given that we were seated across from one another with plates and drinks in front of us it was impossible to include any type of kino. We had some laughs and she was friendly. Turns out both her parents are lawyers and so she seems to carry herself in a very classy manner which made it difficult for me.

I walked her to her car after and she went for the hug and didn’t give me even a split second to move for a kiss. I asked her if we should do this again sometime and she said Yes, which seemed genuine.

Granted, this was our “meetup” moving off Hinge. I’m not sure if I should have higher expectations or not. I think that text response (See image) says all I need to know from here. She was a cool chick and I did see compatibility but overall I think my nerves got the best of me.

Would enjoy any feedback. Thanks fellas

Edit - Worth noting that her day yesterday was very busy. She returned from Florida around 1pm and still made the 25 minute drive to my area for the meetup. She put in a great deal of effort to meetup. This surely doesn’t change the date, which I wouldn’t say was a disaster by any means but her level of interest could have been higher imo.
 

Attachments

Bigpapa

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 17, 2020
Messages
3,138
Reaction score
2,454
Age
124
Post Mortem:

The date could have went better. The conversation was very fluid and lasted for about 2.5 hours, which was a bit beyond her 7pm plans.

Given that we were seated across from one another with plates and drinks in front of us it was impossible to include any type of kino. We had some laughs and she was friendly. Turns out both her parents are lawyers and so she seems to carry herself in a very classy manner which made it difficult for me.

I walked her to her car after and she went for the hug and didn’t give me even a split second to move for a kiss. I asked her if we should do this again sometime and she said Yes, which seemed genuine.

Granted, this was our “meetup” moving off Hinge. I’m not sure if I should have higher expectations or not. I think that text response (See image) says all I need to know from here. She was a cool chick and I did see compatibility but overall I think my nerves got the best of me.

Would enjoy any feedback. Thanks fellas

Edit - Worth noting that her day yesterday was very busy. She returned from Florida around 1pm and still made the 25 minute drive to my area for the meetup. She put in a great deal of effort to meetup. This surely doesn’t change the date, which I wouldn’t say was a disaster by any means but her level of interest could have been higher imo.
you are framing it as a relationship which is very very dangerous ( as you get attached before doing the vetting if she is an ok person or not ) , but I guess that this is what you want
 

SH03C

Don Juan
Joined
May 16, 2019
Messages
133
Reaction score
56
you are framing it as a relationship which is very very dangerous , but I guess that this is what you want
Yeah. When I first asked for a meetup she said she was looking for something serious, marriage and kids etc. I think I read into that too much. My half drunken post date text could have been better for sure.
 

Bigpapa

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 17, 2020
Messages
3,138
Reaction score
2,454
Age
124
Yeah. When I first asked for a meetup she said she was looking for something serious, marriage and kids etc. I think I read into that too much. My half drunken post date text could have been better for sure.
most important thing when it comes to women , never get sucked in her frame . In the moment you do , it is game over
 

SH03C

Don Juan
Joined
May 16, 2019
Messages
133
Reaction score
56
most important thing when it comes to women , never get sucked in her frame . In the moment you do , it is game over
Should I respond to her text? Is this kinda dead in the water from here?
 

SH03C

Don Juan
Joined
May 16, 2019
Messages
133
Reaction score
56
Post Mortem:

The date could have went better. The conversation was very fluid and lasted for about 2.5 hours, which was a bit beyond her 7pm plans.

Given that we were seated across from one another with plates and drinks in front of us it was impossible to include any type of kino. We had some laughs and she was friendly. Turns out both her parents are lawyers and so she seems to carry herself in a very classy manner which made it difficult for me.

I walked her to her car after and she went for the hug and didn’t give me even a split second to move for a kiss. I asked her if we should do this again sometime and she said Yes, which seemed genuine.

Granted, this was our “meetup” moving off Hinge. I’m not sure if I should have higher expectations or not. I think that text response (See image) says all I need to know from here. She was a cool chick and I did see compatibility but overall I think my nerves got the best of me.

Would enjoy any feedback. Thanks fellas

Edit - Worth noting that her day yesterday was very busy. She returned from Florida around 1pm and still made the 25 minute drive to my area for the meetup. She put in a great deal of effort to meetup. This surely doesn’t change the date, which I wouldn’t say was a disaster by any means but her level of interest could have been higher imo.
Being that @SargeMaximus runs the show here, or so I’ve heard, I’m curious to hear your perspective on this sir.

@catsmeow would you mind providing some female perspective? I would really enjoy hearing your thoughts.

Would be greatly appreciated.
 

Attachments

Last edited:

Create self-fulfilling prophecies. Always assume the positive. Assume she likes you. Assume she wants to talk to you. Assume she wants to go out with you. When you think positive, positive things happen.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

SargeMaximus

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 14, 2020
Messages
3,920
Reaction score
1,975
Age
36
Being that @SargeMaximus runs the show here, or so I’ve heard, I’m curious to hear your perspective on this sir.

@catsmeow would you mind providing some female perspective? I would really enjoy hearing your thoughts.

Would be greatly appreciated.
Lol, I don’t run the show here, but I’m glad you wanted my input.

from what I’ve read you were too formal (nice guy) and reading the text exchange, she’s not interested. Below is an example of what an interested woman texts look like:
 

Attachments

RobbyDog

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 7, 2021
Messages
196
Reaction score
249
Age
41
OP, I recommend you do some reading—3% man and the DJ Bible would be a good start.

What I’ve done before when sitting across from a girl is play footsies with her. Then while smiling, accuse her of doing it and to stop bc she’s scuffing my boots. Then I do it again a while later. This is playful and gets under her skin. You can also ask her to show you her jewelry/tattoos on her hands/arms and do some kino that way.

All may not be lost with this woman. Sounds like the type of girl who would want to settle down with a “nice” guy. If you do get her on another date, you need to lead and escalate.
 

SH03C

Don Juan
Joined
May 16, 2019
Messages
133
Reaction score
56
OP, I recommend you do some reading—3% man and the DJ Bible would be a good start.

What I’ve done before when sitting across from a girl is play footsies with her. Then accuse her of doing it and to stop bc she’s scuffing my boots. Then I do it again a while later. This is playful and gets under her skin. You can also ask her to show you her jewelry/tattoos on her hands/arms and do some kino that way.

All may not be lost with this woman. Sounds like the type of girl who would want to settle down with a “nice” guy. If you do get her on another date, you need to lead and escalate.
I framed our time yesterday as a “meetup” as this was our first time meeting from OLD. Not sure that matters much, but if there were a 2nd encounter I’d aim for a concert or something more lively than a drink and convo.

All in all she was not what I expected. Almost too intelligent, has a biology degree and masters in virology, both her parents are lawyers. I felt a little outmatched at that point but didn’t show it. Definitely expected it to go better and thought I’d be doing more validation. She did the majority of talking, probably 60/40 her
 

Bigpapa

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 17, 2020
Messages
3,138
Reaction score
2,454
Age
124
I framed our time yesterday as a “meetup” as this was our first time meeting from OLD. Not sure that matters much, but if there were a 2nd encounter I’d aim for a concert or something more lively than a drink and convo.

All in all she was not what I expected. Almost too intelligent, has a biology degree and masters in virology, both her parents are lawyers. I felt a little outmatched at that point but didn’t show it. Definitely expected it to go better and thought I’d be doing more validation. She did the majority of talking, probably 60/40 her
you are on the verge of getting an oneits :)
 

Bigpapa

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 17, 2020
Messages
3,138
Reaction score
2,454
Age
124
Also @SH03C , read this long time ago , and is a really good starting point about dealing with women early in the seduction

the summary , just like the title is , is that women have different rules depending on how attractive you are as a guy . And being attractive is way more than looks

 

Channel your excited feelings into positive thoughts and behaviors. You will attract women by being enthusiastic, radiating energy, and becoming someone who is fun to be around.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

EyeBRollin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 18, 2015
Messages
10,688
Reaction score
8,630
Age
35
Being that @SargeMaximus runs the show here, or so I’ve heard, I’m curious to hear your perspective on this sir.

@catsmeow would you mind providing some female perspective? I would really enjoy hearing your thoughts.

Would be greatly appreciated.
This text was completely unnecessary. Don’t let women know after a date you had a good time. Keep her ass in limbo where she belongs.
 

SH03C

Don Juan
Joined
May 16, 2019
Messages
133
Reaction score
56
This text was completely unnecessary. Don’t let women know after a date you had a good time. Keep her ass in limbo where she belongs.
And so how would I go about things from here. I’m thinking it’s probably best to not respond to her message.
 

SH03C

Don Juan
Joined
May 16, 2019
Messages
133
Reaction score
56
Why would you think that?

Ignoring women is a bad idea. The response is -

“Yes, I did. Thank you.”

Then wait 5-9 days of full radio silence and ask her out again.
I do like that actually. Would it not come off as perhaps spiteful, Considering she did not reciprocate my text?
 

EyeBRollin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 18, 2015
Messages
10,688
Reaction score
8,630
Age
35
I do like that actually. Would it not come off as perhaps spiteful, Considering she did not reciprocate my text?
No. Do not ignore. The text is direct and somewhat gracious. Nothing more is needed. Get out of the habit of telling women after a date how good of a time you had. You are killing the mystery.
 
Top