I’ll briefly tell my story and how pathetic I was. Keep in mind this was little over 3 years ago so I wasn’t young and stupid, I was just stupid. I had terrible luck in dating for about a year, I couldn’t get past one date or make anything progress into something. Worst string of luck I’d ever experienced and couldn’t get out of it, the more I tried the more I’d fail and the more depressed and loss of respect for myself I got. Ended up meeting this girl randomly on Facebook, we had some mutual friends and she sent me a friend request and we started talking. I could instantly tell a connection that didn’t feel forced, the problem is that made me let me guard down and off my game. We went on like 4-5 dates in a month and never had sex but made out a lot. I tried to progress but she wouldn’t give me the opportunity, like she wouldn’t come to my house or anything. I was already getting attached for some reason, I guess because finally something was clicking past a date or two after a year of experiencing constant rejection and failure. I did so many stupid things. Anyways she ghosts me for about 3 weeks after our 5th date but she still will text some in those 3 weeks but blew me off a couple times when I tried to make plans. I was coming to grips that it was over and went on a couple dates after that with two other girls. Problem is I was thinking about her the whole time.
She texts me randomly after 3 weeks of ghosting and get this, hits me up for money! I was so happy thinking she was reaching out because she missed me, no she was reaching out to borrow $100. Know what I did? I took it to her.lol Wait it gets worse, much worse. The next day she texts me to come over and of course I rush right over. She ends up friendzoning me but at the time I didn’t know that’s what she was doing. She said she just got out of a relationship and wasn’t ready to date and still had feelings for her ex BUT she liked me and enjoyed spending time with me and wanted to keep doing so, “nothing changes between us!” she kept saying. Well I took that to mean “nothing changes” as we keep going on dates, but to her I was friendzoned a long time ago and didn’t know it yet and those 3 weeks she kept blowing me off was her trying to figure out how to do it and keepme around and she was still talking to her ex I’m guessing. My gut was telling me “run” and I couldn’t think of words to say when she was talking because I was not in the right mindset.
Wait it gets better! We hangout for 4 days in a row not going on normal dates but painting her house and doing random **** like that. She then tells me a week later, “I’ve been giving it some thought, I am starting to be able to see myself in a relationship with you.” Then guess what, she ghosts me again and I try to make plans and she cancels like she does before. I want to call her out on her mixed signals so bad but I know I won’t get a straight answer.
Wait there’s more! Another 3 weeks go by and she randomly texts me “want to go to this concert with me? I have tickets”. Sure why not. After this concert we start hanging out once a week for the whole summer doing everything you can think of. I was her orbiter. Oh I’d try to flirt and stuff but she side stepped it and once got mad “we are just friends!”. She was the perfect example of watch what women do not what they say, my emotions for her were all over the place. I was too available, when we’d go do stuff I’d pay 90% of the time, I got to where if I didn’t get a text from her for a couple days I’d get anxious. The weird thing is I didn’t blow up her phone or text her first all the time.
This whatever it was faux friendship got progressively worse over time. She got to where the last year of it she’s only hit me up to borrow money and we’d still hangout sometimes but never like it was before. Or when she needed a favor.
There’s more to the story but I could write about it all day. The thing is I lost my self respect, what little bit I had when I met her. She didn’t respect me, I know she talked about me behind my back because she did that about everyone. She taught me alot and toughened me up though.
The sad thing is I dated other girls during this 2 years of knowing her but I couldn’t give me full attention to them because she was always on my mind and if she’d ask to hangout I’d come running. I missed so many chances with other girls because I couldn’t break away from her. Don’t end up being me, please.
I must have asked her out 4 times over 2 years and sounded pathetic each time I did so. Finally the last time I asked her out and she said wasn’t ready for a relationship I finally grabbed my balls and walked away.
