It's okay to have a crush on a woman

[oc16]

Contrary, to what many PUA's will tell you and others on this board will tell you; It's okay to have a crush on a woman, even if you have never talked to her.

The point is, don't have ONE crush on ONE woman; have multiple at any given time.

 

[Robert28]

Usually if I have a crush on a woman before I know her I end up getting friendzoned. However if I see a woman I think is hot and just approach her, I’ve always had more success that way. Must be a mind thing.

 

[Plinco]

Seducing a woman that you have a crush for does not work. However transmutating the sexual energy into other tasks can be useful.

 

[Mike32ct]

Seducing a woman that you have a crush for does not work. However transmutating the sexual energy into other tasks can be useful.

Very interesting insight. I was thinking about this too. When you have a “crush,” you are secretly in love with her and want her to be your gf. You wouldn’t turn down a quick bang, but that’s not really your objective.

The problem is that the crush guy (because of his more romantic than sexual feelings) doesn’t project a strong sexual frame. So she ends up getting more turned on by another guy that ONLY wants to bang her, and she ends up hooking up with him instead. And if she (and he) eventually get attached from the sex, he becomes the boyfriend instead.

This ties in exactly with what Robert just noted. His chances are better with a chick he immediately lusted for rather than developed “crush” feelings for.

TLDR: Looks aside, the guy who only wants bang her often has a better chance than the guy that loves her and wants to be her boyfriend.

 

[Mike32ct]

The point is, don't have ONE crush on ONE woman; have multiple at any given time.

Yes, if you must have crushes, diversify your portfolio. If you have only one, it will tank like a 90s tech stock.

 

[Plinco]

Very interesting insight. I was thinking about this too. When you have a “crush,” you are secretly in love with her and want her to be your gf. You wouldn’t turn down a quick bang, but that’s not really your objective.

The problem is that the crush guy (because of his more romantic than sexual feelings) doesn’t project a strong sexual frame. So she ends up getting more turned on by another guy that ONLY wants to bang her, and she ends up hooking up with him instead. And if she (and he) eventually get attached from the sex, he becomes the boyfriend instead.

This ties in exactly with what Robert just noted. His chances are better with a chick he immediately lusted for rather than developed “crush” feelings for.

TLDR: Looks aside, the guy who only wants bang her often has a better chance than the guy that loves her and wants to be her boyfriend.

This was a few different insights I had over my adult lifetime. This is the reason why I believe people (both men and women) were more economically productive when monogamy was much more enforced. Having a crush hyper-energizes the 'beta' mindset to become a more successful 'beta.' Women on the other hand try as hard as they can to get the most 'alpha' they can get in that monogamous environment.

Today, with our more promiscuous culture, having a crush is a lose-lose situation unless you can transmutate that energy into something productive for yourself and only for yourself.

 

[darksprezzatura]

Not sure what you mean by having a crush.

Maybe it means you like a girl but haven't asked her out. If so, go ask her out.

 

[oc16]

Not sure what you mean by having a crush.

Maybe it means you like a girl but haven't asked her out. If so, go ask her out.

I guess a crush is an emotional feeling. A particular woman intrigues you. You want to get to know her or know her better (even if you've never spoken). It's more than just thinking she is is attractive and you want to sleep with her.