Can’t Get Out of Bed to Save My Life

[Scaramouche]

Hi Nick,
Well it could be worse(Or better depending in your point of view),You could have a long haired Mate you picked up last night lying along side of you....So you roll over for a Morning Matinee Session,exhaust yourself,go back to sleep and that's you for the afternoon LOL.

 

[zekko]

Sometimes I get a lustful thought, and I get out of bed quickly before I'm tempted to fap.

They say the best time to have sex is in the morning, because your body is rested. Morning wood can also be a thing. As I said before, I've never been a morning person, and that extends to sex, whether that be team or solo. I've always thought having sex first thing in the morning before even getting out of bed was kind of disgusting, because who wants to kiss with morning breath? I guess you don't need to kiss though.

 

[corrector]

They say the best time to have sex is in the morning, because your body is rested. Morning wood can also be a thing. As I said before, I've never been a morning person, and that extends to sex, whether that be team or solo. I've always thought having sex first thing in the morning before even getting out of bed was kind of disgusting, because who wants to kiss with morning breath? I guess you don't need to kiss though.

Ha! Fapping takes you out of the zone if you intend to thanks and pray. That's why I extended a no-fap one hour before wake-up rule so that I don't fap too close to the wake-up point and have a potentially awkward moment of fapping and then thanking God just afterwards and then asking Him to forgive me for lusting and fapping at the same time....cause it just feels too sick like that.

 

[9-3enthusiast]

I have two dogs - so I CAN'T lay in bed for however long I want. They get walked same time every morning, and pester me if it doesn't happen on time.
Alarm goes off same time every day, but my body clock almost always wakes me a few mins before it goes off. My routine is to go to the bathroom, then downstairs and make coffee - After my coffee I shower then walk the dogs.
They're used to my routine.... any changes to it and they pester me to go out - If I try to lay in bed after the alarm, they're up at my bed pawing at me.

 

[speed dawg]

I hate getting up too. I can't see myself ever getting up before I actually have to, due to job or whatever I'm doing that day. I intentionally try not to schedule things early. I'm a night owl personally.

Obviously things like proper exercise and diet help, but for purposes of this discussion, I'm looking at the bigger picture.

I don't buy the whole "not passionate" crap. I know a host of baby boomers who get up at 5 on the dot every day, and have ZERO passions or want-to for life, and hate their jobs. It's just what they do - they get up early and go to bed early. I also know way too many others who are night owls and go to work at 9, and are successful. There's not a rhyme or reason to it.

All that to say, I do not know the answer, especially in the grind of life. I try to just have as many things as possible to look forward to.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

I’m implementing more and more techniques so that I can be super productive and eventually completely fix my life.

One of the biggest struggles I have, is just getting out of bed in the morning. I always end up just slamming the alarm and going back to sleep. Which subsequently ruins my life lol. My life would be way way better if I could effortlessly, consistently get out of bed in the morning without going back to sleep.

Right now, I use the Alarmy App. It does a fantastic job of getting me out of bed, because you have to scan a picture of a room outside your bed to get it to shut off. But a lot of the time, I end up getting up, turning off the alarm, and then jumping right back in bed.

I’m considering buying the “Wake Up Check” feature, which asks you if you are fully awake. If you don’t respond yes, it “revives” your alarm. If I get Alarmy Premium, that would be $40 a year. If I can get up on time, it’s worth it.

But I was wondering if you guys had any ideas too. How can I keep myself from going back into bed in the mornings?

P.S. Cal Newport is spot on about working in bed being a disaster. Not even once, bro.

1) You are aware of the problem. That is half the battle, focus on small wins.
2) "Completely fix my life". That is the wrong mindset. Assuming anyone knows what the even means, don't think of the end goal but rather the process. Life is about growth. Like I said focus on small wins, forward progress is a win.
3) What time do you go to bed? Dig deep and try to find the reason why you are having a hard time getting out of bed. Eg. Are you going on deep sleep and rest? That might reveal partially why it is a struggle every morning. Your body is telling you someting.

and last but not least...

4) Make making your bed your #1 daily task. If your bed is made, there is a lesser chance you'll want to go back to it. If you are task oriented, making this task your top priority as soon as you wake up (something I personally implemented years ago) will act like a domino effect for the rest of your day. Hint: It creates a mindset. And that is sustainable and produces results in many areas of your life.


Hope this helps.


Modern Man Advice

 

[Kotaix]

You're 24. Young people sleep in all the time. I was just like you until I was around 30. It's only now that I'm over 40 that I'm finally waking up early on my own without much need for an alarm.

Also, working a night shift is horrible for you, get out of that as soon as you graduate.

 

[nicksaiz65]

You mention you're in college. Younger people such as yourself can often need more sleep than they think they need. Working a night job will also destroy your sleep cycle. Are you sleeping at different times depending on which days you work, or are you keeping a consistent schedule? The best thing I can recommend for this sort of problem is to keep a consistent sleep schedule, possibly with the aid of melatonin, which helps keep your sleep regular. Try to go to sleep and wake up at the same time each day.

Unfortunately, it sounds like that may not be practical for you. Something else to think about is that if you're going to school full time and working, you may not have a lot of time for anything else. And that's okay, because it's only temporary and you are trying to self improve - school and work are your priorities right now. Another thing to think about is that deep thinking can fatigue you just as much as physical work, and if you're in college you're probably concentrating a lot.

Also agree with the possible sleep apnea @Family Man mentioned.

Yeah, I have no consistent sleep schedule whatsoever. This is due to the fact to whatever I have to do that day can vary wildly. Between my job, and just student life trying to keep my grades up.

Yes, I do have sleep apnea unfortunately.

I'm still working on losing weight and getting lean. That should fix the sleep apnea. Then I'll get a test to ensure that it is fixed.

 

[nicksaiz65]

Have you had your blood levels checked? Are you overweight? What's your diet look like? More healthy fats and protein, less carbs. One cheat day a week is allowed.

I've never had any bloodwork done in my life, no. I'm still just barely overweight. I am on a cut right now to fix that, and it's going quite well. I need some more time to get totally back within the normal healthy range, but I will be there 100% now that I've embraced Intermittent Fasting, CICO, and IIFYM/flexible dieting.

For protein, I follow the Greg Doucette recommendation of .5-1 G of protein per pound of bodyweight for maintaining and building muscle. I'm often taking the lower end, because it makes the diet more enjoyable, easier to stick to, and not to mention cheaper. I'm hitting around 100-140 G of protein a day usually. Similar to how Kinobody did on his cutting diet: easy to stick to and quite effective.

As for the foods I eat, it's quite repetitive. But delicious. A lot of low fat popcorn, protein shakes, chicken(I eat legs and thighs as well to get more fats), steaks, and a Rice Krispie square before bed usually.

I'm not trying to hit any specific macro split. I just make sure I'm in a deficit, get sufficient protein, make sure I'm not cutting out healthy fats, and then let the fats and carbs fall where they may.

But, I really need to be better about eating more fruits and vegetables. As horrible as I felt on that bland bodybuilder diet in the past, I will say it had adequate fruits and vegetables. I haven't eaten a vegetable in nearly 2 weeks I think. Even though I'm losing fat, my plan is sustainable, and the food on it is delicious, I kind of feel like garbage. I think it's because I'm slacking on my fruits and vegetables. Not good.

 

[nicksaiz65]

NIC's been getting fit lately.

Hey Nick. I've had periods where i pop up filled with energy for years at a time due to living in my purpose for a long time. It wasn't that i was "trying" it's that it was important to me.

Then I've had periods were it's harder to wakeup. Not really on purpose, no strong routine.

This morning I got up and didn't feel any energy. Actually felt soreness like it was hard to imagine how i can be physically active. I went outside for 5 minutes and had sunlight on me, for whatever reason i became invigorated and it was hard to remember that i ever felt like $hit.

I see. It's all in the mindset, yeah? You just have to get out of the bed and get to it like others have said in this thread.

 

[Sam_J]

I’m implementing more and more techniques so that I can be super productive and eventually completely fix my life.

One of the biggest struggles I have, is just getting out of bed in the morning. I always end up just slamming the alarm and going back to sleep. Which subsequently ruins my life lol. My life would be way way better if I could effortlessly, consistently get out of bed in the morning without going back to sleep.

Right now, I use the Alarmy App. It does a fantastic job of getting me out of bed, because you have to scan a picture of a room outside your bed to get it to shut off. But a lot of the time, I end up getting up, turning off the alarm, and then jumping right back in bed.

I’m considering buying the “Wake Up Check” feature, which asks you if you are fully awake. If you don’t respond yes, it “revives” your alarm. If I get Alarmy Premium, that would be $40 a year. If I can get up on time, it’s worth it.

But I was wondering if you guys had any ideas too. How can I keep myself from going back into bed in the mornings?

P.S. Cal Newport is spot on about working in bed being a disaster. Not even once, bro.

I've had the same problem. I think it's actually a mild form of depressiont/boredom tbh. You have to have something that gets you excited about getting out of bed. Maybe an interesting book that you keep in the other room or a good breakfast, etc, or something that you save for first thing in the morning to motivate yourself to get out of bed. Even a substance (as long as it's fairly innocent like caffeine/coffee, etc.). Without that stuff I would also struggle a lot as well and with nothing to do it's actually easy to stay in bed for several hours or even the entire day and have no motivation to get up whatsoever.

 

[nicksaiz65]

OP, waking up and getting going every morning Should be a stimulating and energetic thing for you to do.
It was for me when I enjoyed having my own retail business for 28 years.

If you think you can put off your uptime activities by remaining asleep longer, then there is no passion for you in what you’re doing.

As I see it you have about three remedy choices.
•Find something more exciting and different to do.
•Stay with what you do and get energized with an inner passion.
•Or see a Psych on a professional basis and get to the bottom of what’s wrong.

Bottom line - If you don’t really like what you’re doing, but think you still need to do it, That’s a big problem for the current you and your future self…
Your first clue is asking yourself what you want.

Honestly, I'm not sure what I want long long term.

All I know for sure is that I want to have a degree, get myself out of debt, have a high paying professional job and be a six figure guy, Instagram worthy body, a nice hairstyle, and do lots of approaches and get my laycount sky high, travel around lots, and become a virtuoso at playing violin.

Well, I guess those are goals right? That's basically the motivation getting me out of bed at this point.

I actually might make a separate thread on this, tbh.

 

[nicksaiz65]

I was also tired all the time. I recently lost 17 lbs, and now I have more energy than I’ve had in years. Feel like a new person.

I agree with everybody that mentioned weight, if that is an issue for you.

I'm hoping that it's the same for me once I get as lean as I'd like to be. Congratulations on your weight loss! What methods did you use to achieve it?

 

[nicksaiz65]

I've had the same problem. I think it's actually a mild form of depressiont/boredom tbh. You have to have something that gets you excited about getting out of bed. Maybe an interesting book that you keep in the other room or a good breakfast, etc, or something that you save for first thing in the morning to motivate yourself to get out of bed. Even a substance (as long as it's fairly innocent like caffeine/coffee, etc.). Without that stuff I would also struggle a lot as well and with nothing to do it's actually easy to stay in bed for several hours or even the entire day and have no motivation to get up whatsoever.

I do think I was mildly depressed at one point lol. However, I don't want to be too quick to pull the trigger on that and give myself an out. I'm trying to make my policy towards myself "If you are depressed, figure out wtf you are going to do about it instead of laying around feeling sorry for myself."

 

[nicksaiz65]

1) You are aware of the problem. That is half the battle, focus on small wins.
2) "Completely fix my life". That is the wrong mindset. Assuming anyone knows what the even means, don't think of the end goal but rather the process. Life is about growth. Like I said focus on small wins, forward progress is a win.
3) What time do you go to bed? Dig deep and try to find the reason why you are having a hard time getting out of bed. Eg. Are you going on deep sleep and rest? That might reveal partially why it is a struggle every morning. Your body is telling you someting.

and last but not least...

4) Make making your bed your #1 daily task. If your bed is made, there is a lesser chance you'll want to go back to it. If you are task oriented, making this task your top priority as soon as you wake up (something I personally implemented years ago) will act like a domino effect for the rest of your day. Hint: It creates a mindset. And that is sustainable and produces results in many areas of your life.


Hope this helps.


Modern Man Advice

1.) Indeed. I know that my quality of life would improve once I fix this issue.
2.) Yes, that is true. The only one who knows what "fix my life" means is me. It just kind of hurts when looking at everyone else it seems they are miles above me. I want to catch them, and I know that I can. But that's a separate thread so I won't get sidetracked too much.
3.) At completely random times, when I go to bed completely depends on when I finish whatever work I am trying to accomplish that day. One day, I'll have the ability to get up at any time, just with my alarm. But yeah.
4.) I haven't done this one, but I will take action and start. That's quite a simple step, but I can definitely implement it.

 

[RickTheToad]

I've never had any bloodwork done in my life, no. I'm still just barely overweight. I am on a cut right now to fix that, and it's going quite well. I need some more time to get totally back within the normal healthy range, but I will be there 100% now that I've embraced Intermittent Fasting, CICO, and IIFYM/flexible dieting.

For protein, I follow the Greg Doucette recommendation of .5-1 G of protein per pound of bodyweight for maintaining and building muscle. I'm often taking the lower end, because it makes the diet more enjoyable, easier to stick to, and not to mention cheaper. I'm hitting around 100-140 G of protein a day usually. Similar to how Kinobody did on his cutting diet: easy to stick to and quite effective.

As for the foods I eat, it's quite repetitive. But delicious. A lot of low fat popcorn, protein shakes, chicken(I eat legs and thighs as well to get more fats), steaks, and a Rice Krispie square before bed usually.

I'm not trying to hit any specific macro split. I just make sure I'm in a deficit, get sufficient protein, make sure I'm not cutting out healthy fats, and then let the fats and carbs fall where they may.

But, I really need to be better about eating more fruits and vegetables. As horrible as I felt on that bland bodybuilder diet in the past, I will say it had adequate fruits and vegetables. I haven't eaten a vegetable in nearly 2 weeks I think. Even though I'm losing fat, my plan is sustainable, and the food on it is delicious, I kind of feel like garbage. I think it's because I'm slacking on my fruits and vegetables. Not good.

I do not know who Grg Douch is, but, I can tell you limit the rice krispie square to a couple times a week and add beef protein to help bulk. Make sure you use high quality organic grass fed protein shakes; not GMO garbage stuff. Popcorn, not good for you either. Learn how to make beef jerky at home, and other high quality, delicious and high protein treats in your kitchen. It's easier than you think. Do get your blood work done thing. Careful on the fruits, some have a lot of sugar.

 

[nicksaiz65]

I do not know who Grg Douch is, but, I can tell you limit the rice krispie square to a couple times a week and add beef protein to help bulk. Make sure you use high quality organic grass fed protein shakes; not GMO garbage stuff. Popcorn, not good for you either. Learn how to make beef jerky at home, and other high quality, delicious and high protein treats in your kitchen. It's easier than you think. Do get your blood work done thing. Careful on the fruits, some have a lot of sugar.

I’ll get some blood work done. I’d imagine the markers improve the leaner I get as well.

I recently bought an Air Fryer and it’s been a complete game changer. I could definitely make some jerky in it. That sounds really good tbh.

 

[RickTheToad]

I’ll get some blood work done. I’d imagine the markers improve the leaner I get as well.

I recently bought an Air Fryer and it’s been a complete game changer. I could definitely make some jerky in it. That sounds really good tbh.

Air Fryer Oven Beef Jerky

All it takes is a few ingredients and some patience to whip up a big batch of homemade beef jerky in an air fryer.

www.allrecipes.com

 

[nicksaiz65]

Lay out shoes and a jogging outfit before bed.
Set an alarm in another room that you have to physically get up and walk to turn off.
Have a glass of water beside the alarm.

In the morning once you turn the alarm off, slam the glass of water, and then go for a walk or a run. Don't even go for a p!ss, don't wash your face, don't check your phone – nothing. Slam the water, put your shoes & outfit on, and get out of the house.

The alarm in another room gets you physically out of bed.
Water & outfit prepared the night before reduces the friction to accomplish those tasks once your alarm goes off.
The walk and water gets the body moving and hydrated.
Walk/jog until you feel alert. That could be 3 minutes or 30 minutes.
During your walk/jog, plan a to-do list to initiate once you get home. As soon as you get home, do the first task, and then do your morning routine (brush, eat, p!ss, study, put on coffee, etc)

---

Additional tips:
- Wake-up at the same time EVERY day
- Exercise adequately
- Improve your diet
- Don't take melatonin
- Reduce caffeine intake


At the end of the day, there is no magic formula for getting out of bed – except for getting the fvck out of your bed.

After the alarm goes off, you need to move. A body in motion stays in motion. Reduce the friction the night before by having part of your morning laid out for you already so there's less decision making going once your alarm goes off.

Yo, these tips have been working great. Combined with an alarm that forces me to do math problems to shut it off(to get my brain running), and these tips I’ve been getting up more consistently. I have so much time now.

Even on 3-4 hours of sleep, I’m able to get up.

 

[nicksaiz65]

And this might be an obvious one, but playing some music that I like from Spotify the second that I get up has really been helping me get out of bed as well.