The number 1 subtle sign a man is low value

Joined
Mar 9, 2021
Messages
3,477
Reaction score
2,755
Age
29
A flake in my definition is any cancellation greater than two hours. Anything less than or greater than two hours is being stood up not a flake. I'm not saying it's good to be flaked on but if this ruins your day then you have too much to lose on a female.
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
13,520
Reaction score
11,383
A flake in my definition is any cancellation greater than two hours. Anything less than or greater than two hours is being stood up not a flake. I'm not saying it's good to be flaked on but if this ruins your day then you have too much to lose on a female.
Appreciate the definition. I've had less than 2 hours flakes and no shows in life, though not often. I think the rise in popularity of text messaging starting in the late 2000s reduced the stood up factor. The more common occurrence for me has been the same day cancellation with something like 3-9 hours notice.

Both the stand up and the flake will impact my day to some extent. It's difficult not to be bothered about it. The easiest thing I mentioned above is not sending a text message as a reply. While you can bothered about it on your own, it is good not to let the other person know.

If it is early stages and I haven't had sex with the woman and there's a flake/stand up, communication is ceased. If there's a cancellation with an attempt to re-schedule made on her part, I'll likely interact.

The most difficult thing I find in early stages are the "one date, no sex, no second date" dates. I haven't enjoyed occurrences when there was a first date with no sex and I wanted a second date. I made the offer for the second date and either received no response or got some phony azz text of "I had a good time but do not see this going anywhere" type text.

At what point does female flaking affect those that say it doesn't? Suppose you want a vagina to surround your djck instead of your hand by the time the 3rd or 4th or 9th female in a row flakes...
It's difficult not to take that personally. I'd say that would occur around the 3rd or 4th flake in a row happens. Rarely will a man get that many flakes in a row. It might go something like flake, flake, show (but no sex), flake, show (but no sex)
 
Joined
Mar 9, 2021
Messages
3,477
Reaction score
2,755
Age
29
So when you are on the date with her face buried in her phone. Get up and leave. On 2nd thought. If you dont like her get up and leave. Dont waste your time you have shyt to do because you are the shyt and you know it.
And you are going to get even more of it.
Then leave lol
 

biggoal

Banned
Joined
Jul 19, 2019
Messages
3,696
Reaction score
798
Age
40
Appreciate the definition. I've had less than 2 hours flakes and no shows in life, though not often. I think the rise in popularity of text messaging starting in the late 2000s reduced the stood up factor. The more common occurrence for me has been the same day cancellation with something like 3-9 hours notice.

Both the stand up and the flake will impact my day to some extent. It's difficult not to be bothered about it. The easiest thing I mentioned above is not sending a text message as a reply. While you can bothered about it on your own, it is good not to let the other person know.

If it is early stages and I haven't had sex with the woman and there's a flake/stand up, communication is ceased. If there's a cancellation with an attempt to re-schedule made on her part, I'll likely interact.

The most difficult thing I find in early stages are the "one date, no sex, no second date" dates. I haven't enjoyed occurrences when there was a first date with no sex and I wanted a second date. I made the offer for the second date and either received no response or got some phony azz text of "I had a good time but do not see this going anywhere" type text.



It's difficult not to take that personally. I'd say that would occur around the 3rd or 4th flake in a row happens. Rarely will a man get that many flakes in a row. It might go something like flake, flake, show (but no sex), flake, show (but no sex)
No text after the date and total ghost? Only had that once in my life and that was with a gold digger. That instance the date was going excellent until I told her about my job. Never had that happen otherwise.
 

metalwater

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 23, 2019
Messages
1,641
Reaction score
1,349
Location
random
So when you are on the date with her face buried in her phone. Get up and leave.
this is very good advice. I can map this behavior back to good and bad results. meaning, when the woman did this it wasn't any good later, and following this advice would have been better.
 

CAPSLOCK BANDIT

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 29, 2020
Messages
2,845
Reaction score
2,170
this is very good advice. I can map this behavior back to good and bad results. meaning, when the woman did this it wasn't any good later, and following this advice would have been better.
I'll take it a step further, if her phone is anywhere in sight at all, whether it be on the table in front of her, all is an indication that you are of equal value to her as the phone is to her, that being able to be picked up and put down at will.
 

sangheilios

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 25, 2018
Messages
2,686
Reaction score
2,806
Age
34
Some good posts on here, though I don't agree with the part about becoming bothered by flaking as a sign you are low quality/value. I'd say that a sign a man is of low quality/value is if he keeps chasing stupid attention *****s that are a waste of time.

I'm a very busy individual with multiple things going on and little in the manner of free time. If some dumb ***** that I met flakes on a date, one which we both agreed to, at the last minute I'm going to feel that my time has been completely disrespected. Unless there is a legitimate reason as to why this is occurring, I'm not going to be very happy about this and would probably make a few remarks and then go on with life.

Many women today have entire harems of men on their phones so this type of behavior isn't all that uncommon. I've personally have had quite a few experiences with attention *****s that wasted my time and was not at all neutral in regards to my feelings associated with these particular individuals. Never let a woman waste your time and if they do this call them out on it and then move on, never give second chances to something like this.
 

metalwater

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 23, 2019
Messages
1,641
Reaction score
1,349
Location
random
And I would say such people are made that way by others, not born like it.
yes; this is true. life is competition always.


it is possible that a person can give you respect, but no one can give you self-respect.
 

metalwater

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 23, 2019
Messages
1,641
Reaction score
1,349
Location
random
I'll take it a step further, if her phone is anywhere in sight at all, whether it be on the table in front of her, all is an indication that you are of equal value to her as the phone is to her, that being able to be picked up and put down at will.
where should the phone be, in a purse? or pocket? or hand?

btw I agree with you. I started paying attention to this some time ago. It's a good measure of interest.

applies to men and women.
 

CAPSLOCK BANDIT

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 29, 2020
Messages
2,845
Reaction score
2,170
where should the phone be, in a purse? or pocket? or hand?

btw I agree with you. I started paying attention to this some time ago. It's a good measure of interest.

applies to men and women.
Well IMO it should be where she feels it should and that leaves us to respond to it, if our response to disrespect is tolerance, well that says a lot about you
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

metalwater

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 23, 2019
Messages
1,641
Reaction score
1,349
Location
random
Well IMO it should be where she feels it should and that leaves us to respond to it, if our response to disrespect is tolerance, well that says a lot about you
of course, I get that. so in the purse or pocket. in the hand or on the table allows it to be intrusive and shows that it is the priority.

I keep my phone in the pocket and on vibrate and only for some inbound. I will look at it and then go back to the person I am talking to unless it's really important. that's one of the big points of cell phones is to be available for real high-priority issues.

If the girl does that as I do, it's ok for me. If she takes a real emergency it's ok for me. social media updates are not ok and I will wrap up the situation and exit except in some specific situations.
 

CAPSLOCK BANDIT

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 29, 2020
Messages
2,845
Reaction score
2,170
of course, I get that. so in the purse or pocket. in the hand or on the table allows it to be intrusive and shows that it is the priority.

I keep my phone in the pocket and on vibrate and only for some inbound. I will look at it and then go back to the person I am talking to unless it's really important. that's one of the big points of cell phones is to be available for real high-priority issues.

If the girl does that as I do, it's ok for me. If she takes a real emergency it's ok for me. social media updates are not ok and I will wrap up the situation and exit except in some specific situations.
Her responding to something I don't mind as much, like you said a lot of the time it could be anything from another man to a baby sitter, I think attempting to control her responding to it is a bit much, unless she's responding to every single notification because that's just low interest.

I remember back in the day on a coffee date with an old friend and we sat by the drive thru and anytime a nice vehicle drove by she would immediately lose focus and just stare, I felt incredibly disrespected after about the 10th time this happened but I still tolerated it. Later on that night we were playing poker and it turned to strip poker, I didn't think this girl had the heart to play but an hour later she was literally streaking down the neighborhood, again felt disrespected as hell being that we were like borderline official at that time... Man those were terrible times, I had to learn to ease up a lot but still call out perceived disrespect, it's definitely not easy to tell if your being overbearing or if your being outright disrespected, but Id like to think I have a better handle on it now
 

mjb3617

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 23, 2021
Messages
193
Reaction score
236
Age
39
I'll take it a step further, if her phone is anywhere in sight at all, whether it be on the table in front of her, all is an indication that you are of equal value to her as the phone is to her, that being able to be picked up and put down at will.
Spot on. If she does this on a date, it won't change if you start seeing her regularly.
 

Glassguy

Moderator
Joined
Apr 25, 2016
Messages
4,705
Reaction score
8,656
Age
47
You get triggered by flaking.

Bum ass college me was so worried about getting flaked on and when it did I would blame it on her finding another dvck to hop on. Now I see flaking as a relief because that's an opening in my schedule and now that I'm actually busy, I can fully understand on why a woman would flake. When you are over here crying about a girl flaking, you are showing me that you had nothing better to do all day but sit there and pray that she doesn't flake on you. You are also telling me that you have never had such a hard day's work that maybe you don't have the energy to drive downtown and meet a stranger or maybe you did forget that you had prior arrangements.

Get better man!
While we often disagree on some things, this is a good post. Agree 100%
Getting butt hurt shows weakness, lack of frame and actually makes the women reaffirm her decision to flake.

By being cool and indifferent about it, she will more than likely reach back out because you have already separated yourself from 90% of the guys out there who would throw a fit on her. Women have a 6th sense to sniff out men who are insecure. By remaining indifferent you make her wonder why you didn't get butt hurt. Maybe you have something different about you that she wants to find out for herself what that is, and she hits you up to reschedule.
"OK no problem. Hit me up if something changes/we can try again later on" and then back off and see if she reaches out.
 

Just because a woman listens to you and acts interested in what you say doesn't mean she really is. She might just be acting polite, while silently wishing that the date would hurry up and end, or that you would go away... and never come back.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Top