Picking up beta traits from my dad

[Lordeterra]

Dudes a total loser. Has no job and got ****ing manipulated into marrying my step mom and having two kids with her. He’s a joke. He’s soft and flabby both mentally and physically. He tells me that the wife is the lead of the house (seriously) and that the man should listen to her. It’s pathetic. He tells me not to hit the gym and eat more. He’s a failure. I want him dead. I just worry that I will pick up after him after all he’s my dad the first person a son is supposed to look up to and model. Fvck I wish he died. How would you guys go about this

 

[xplt]

Besides him being weak, why do you hate him so much?
Have you ever tried to get him to better? Is he just a joke or is he also an a.hole?

 

[Bokanovsky]

Dudes a total loser. Has no job and got ****ing manipulated into marrying my step mom and having two kids with her. He’s a joke. He’s soft and flabby both mentally and physically. He tells me that the wife is the lead of the house (seriously) and that the man should listen to her. It’s pathetic. He tells me not to hit the gym and eat more. He’s a failure. I want him dead. I just worry that I will pick up after him after all he’s my dad the first person a son is supposed to look up to and model. Fvck I wish he died. How would you guys go about this

Wishing your own father to be dead is really fvcked up. I mean, if he molested or abused you when you were you were growing up, that’s one thing. But hating him so much just because he is weak or a “loser” is a sign of degeneracy on your own part. This is the man who gave you life and obviously cared enough to raise you and not to give you up for adoption. A little gratitude would be in order.

You don’t pick your parents. Make peace with the fact that your father is not someone you want to imitate. That doesn’t mean you have to hate him or blame him for your failures.

 

[SW15]

I just worry that I will pick up after him after all he’s my dad the first person a son is supposed to look up to and model.

This is normal to feel these worries. @Lordeterra is a late Millennial based on the age in his profile. Earlier Millennials (birth years 1982-1989) had many of these issues with their Baby Boomer fathers born in the late 1940s and 1950s. Baby Boomer male could be beta males and not face devastating consequences in their lives. That wasn't true for my cohort of 1980s born Millennials and also not true for later Millennials and Gen Z.

These Baby Boomer fathers were wholly unprepared to guide their Millennials sons through a post year 2000 mating environment. That's applicable for the 1980s borm Millennial males with fathers who were present in their lives. My father was mostly absent. My parents did not separate until I was 15 and the divorce was finalized when I was 16. However, my father was working long hours and did not spend a sufficient amount of time with me. After the separation, he was fully absent.

I had to learn how to be a man more from reading internet articles and from talking with my uncle (mom's brother). My uncle did what he could but he lived far away in other region of the USA. He couldn't be there on a near daily basis for me. His presence would have been more helpful in certain masculine area but I would have needed to read articles on the internet to handle dating. My uncle's two sons (my cousins) have both experienced shiity behavior from women and divorces. I think my cousins expected to replicate my uncle and aunt staying together in their own lives (a blue pill perspective) rather than reading the objective truth on the internet as I have (more red pill or black pill).

He tells me that the wife is the lead of the house (seriously) and that the man should listen to her.

My father said some similar bullshiit. My father used to say that the goal in life was to make my mom happy. That's some seriously beta stuff there. My dad got me thinking that women were like how he portrayed my mom, some hard to please, demanding woman. That was a bad example.

Women are making more consumer purchase decisions for households so in that sense, your father isn't wrong. Men have been too beta in allowing economic control in households with consumer purchase decisions.

 

[Lordeterra]

Wishing your own father to be dead is really fvcked up. I mean, if he molested or abused you when you were you were growing up, that’s one thing. But hating him so much just because he is weak or a “loser” is a sign of degeneracy on your own part. This is the man who gave you life and obviously cared enough to raise you and not to give you up for adoption. A little gratitude would be in order.

You don’t pick your parents. Make peace with the fact that your father is not someone you want to imitate. That doesn’t mean you have to hate him or blame him for your failures.

You don’t understand. It’s better to have no dad than a weak dad. A weak dad is a NEGATIVE. Just as how if a ship has no workers it’s better to have no worker than a incompetent NEgATIVE worker that will sink the ship.

 

[Lordeterra]

This is normal to feel these worries. @Lordeterra is a late Millennial based on the age in his profile. Earlier Millennials (birth years 1982-1989) had many of these issues with their Baby Boomer fathers born in the late 1940s and 1950s. Baby Boomer male could be beta males and not face devastating consequences in their lives. That wasn't true for my cohort of 1980s born Millennials and also not true for later Millennials and Gen Z.

These Baby Boomer fathers were wholly unprepared to guide their Millennials sons through a post year 2000 mating environment. That's applicable for the 1980s borm Millennial males with fathers who were present in their lives. My father was mostly absent. My parents did not separate until I was 15 and the divorce was finalized when I was 16. However, my father was working long hours and did not spend a sufficient amount of time with me. After the separation, he was fully absent.

I had to learn how to be a man more from reading internet articles and from talking with my uncle (mom's brother). My uncle did what he could but he lived far away in other region of the USA. He couldn't be there on a near daily basis for me. His presence would have been more helpful in certain masculine area but I would have needed to read articles on the internet to handle dating. My uncle's two sons (my cousins) have both experienced shiity behavior from women and divorces. I think my cousins expected to replicate my uncle and aunt staying together in their own lives (a blue pill perspective) rather than reading the objective truth on the internet as I have (more red pill or black pill).



My father said some similar bullshiit. My father used to say that the goal in life was to make my mom happy. That's some seriously beta stuff there. My dad got me thinking that women were like how he portrayed my mom, some hard to please, demanding woman. That was a bad example.

Women are making more consumer purchase decisions for households so in that sense, your father isn't wrong. Men have been too beta in allowing economic control in households with consumer purchase decisions.

My dad was born in Korea. One thing I despise about Asian values is the idea of obedience to authority. This is where the Stereotype of Asians being quiet and shy comes from. It’s cause parents shame children when they speak up and use their voice and it stifles up when we get older

 

[Lordeterra]

Besides him being weak, why do you hate him so much?
Have you ever tried to get him to better? Is he just a joke or is he also an a.hole?

No he’s a joke. But the fact that he’s weak makes him emotional which makes him an *******. Like Jordan Peterson said , if you think tough men are dangerous, think of what weak men can do

 

[SW15]

You don’t understand. It’s better to have no dad than a weak dad. A weak dad is a NEGATIVE.

I had a weak, mostly absent dad. My dad was a provider beta male who made sparse appearances in my life despite being married to my mom for the majority of my childhood. It was bad.

 

[SirBigBell]

Gentlemen. Sometimes we ought to understand and remember that fathers are the products of their life journeys. Some fathers are weak because they come from broken backgrounds, or they went through traumatic experiences that adversely altered their masculine profile.

So while we’re entitled to criticise our fathers for their shortcomings, lets take a moment to understand why they are the way they are.

 

[Lordeterra]

Anger has subsided and I have a more clear headed view especially after the gym. Still resent him but it’s up to me to ****ing take care of my own **** and fix the areas he ****ed up