Wasn't sure if I should make this thread. I'm probably overthinking things because so far everything's been great. But I've been delving into Patrice O'Neal and part of me in the back of my head thinks this "relationship" is ultimately doomed, but I'll describe it if only to get some input from you guys who know what you're talking about.
I'd prefer to hear responses from guys who know what they're talking about; successful guys who have slept with a lot of very attractive women and have had successful relationships or marriages. I know there's no way to verify that you posting are any of these things, but I hope those of you who do decide to say something fit that framework.
Anyway, I'm 27 and she's recently 32. We met off Tinder. I know. We texted back and forth for about a week and decided to hang out. She lives about an hour away and has her own place. First night I visit is a Tuesday we talk for a bit, drink some wine, end up having really great sex and I stay over. We have some more sex in the morning and we go to a diner where she treats me to breakfast and we part ways. I keep in communication with her and we decide to see each other again that weekend. Since then I've spent every weekend (sometimes 1 day, sometimes 2) with the exception of a 2-week period where we both caught COVID.
Here are the facts:
She's older than me. She lives an hour away and has her own house and stuff. She got out of a 10-year relationship about 8 months ago due to repeated cheating on the boyfriend's part. She's slept with 7 guys and I was both her first night stand, and later, the first guy she ever had unprotected sex with. She does not know my body count (75 I think) and has not asked me for that info. She is SIGNIFICANTLY better off financially which is why she tries to pay for things when it comes to me and her friends, I try not to let her because I don't want that to be the dynamic but I'm talking about this woman makes about 500k/year and has offered to buy me a car. She is manic depressive bipolar, meaning she has high highs and really bad low depressing lows, but she takes medication for it so she hasn't had any issues since her relationship. She is adopted and has I think 16 non-biological siblings under 2 lesbian mothers. She had seen a guy from her past after she first hooked up with me, with the expectation that she probably wouldn't see me again - apparently this guy has been trying to lock her down for a long time but she just uses him for sex when she and her boyfriend would take breaks. She is very attractive and likes the attention of men but doesn't like giving herself to them - I've seen this by the hundreds of matches and thirsty Snapchats guys send her that she blows off.
Anyway I'm probably getting too granular but I've been seeing her for about 2 months most weekends and we always have a good time with some alcohol, lots of sex, and just being sweet and treating each other well. However, I'm an aspiring actor/model that's had a difficult time, so I've been working a part time job for flexibility, struggling to break into the market as a newer real estate agent, and live at home with my parents. She is aware of this and doesn't mind since she grew up poor and likes paying for her friends because she doesn't see the point of being rich by herself.
Like I mentioned, things have been going great but I worry about the potential future I may or may not have with this woman. Right now we are not in a relationship but I haven't bothered seeing other girls since her, and aside from the one time with the guy from her past she's cut off ties with the other guys trying to get with her too. She wants me to get my real estate license in her state since she's a wealthy project manager and can hand off houses for me to sell. She wants to buy me a new car because mine sucks and I always treat her really well so she wants to make it up to me. This worries me a bit because from what I've listened to from Patrice O'Neal women want somebody above them, they want somebody greater than them - they want a man who's their king, not to be the queen and have some random man...so I'm looking at trying to change my financial situation.
Aside from that, I took her out last weekend and we got really drunk and I learned some things. She told me how excited she gets when I text her near the weekend since she knows she's about to see me soon. She tells me I gave her back her "fire" that she lost when dating her boyfriend and wasn't used to getting genuine compliments about her being attractive as this guy used to put her down. But she also worries that her being older has us at different stages in life and that I should meet somebody closer to where I'm at, and that she feels she doesn't deserve me.
Again, we were absolutely wasted. It was reassuring to hear how much of an impact I've made and how much she cares, but I'm concerned long-term about the income and how much the age gap bothers her - although she has said she's never dated an older guy anyway.
So this is a lot, I know. I'm basically wanting to play this out and see how far things go because she's gorgeous and a real sweetheart compared to most of the women I've been with. The income and age differences are what might be concern me the most, and how I'd overcome those.
I'm probably overthinking this way too much, nothing's wrong now, I'm just looking to the future.
Looking forward to see what you guys might have to say. If anything needs elaboration feel free to ask, I'll be checking this thread now and then and I'll do my best to reply.