More Red flags with FWB?

[SargeMaximus]

1. When I googled that movie it says it's a thriller/mystery, so maybe that got her excited.

2. Maybe she chose a random movie neither of you would care about, if she picked her favorite or your favorite movie one of you would be too distracted to talk or have sex.

3. It's a movie, you're not supposed to take it so seriously.

4. There's a slim remote possibility that there's some dark undertones to her personality/psychology where rape & murder gets her going but everyone has weird fetishes so that's fine unless it's part of a long series of red flags about that sort of thing.

Makes sense. Thanks.

 

[tightsocks]

Isn't that the movie where they find a sex dungeon in the killer's house? That movie is freaky.

 

[SargeMaximus]

Isn't that the movie where they find a sex dungeon in the killer's house? That movie is freaky.

Yeah basically

 

[PRW63]

I see. I mean I do have the ultimate goal in mind of having multiple long term relationships. But I also don’t like the serious relationship stuff and just want them to be sex first and foremost. So whatever label that is, then that’s what it is. I call her a fwb because we are friends that fvck.

Your are in a Casual Dating situation, not FWB. If it was FWB you wouldn't even be here asking us about this because you wouldn't even care.

Edit: as for the “red flag” question. There are things that are red flags regardless of relationship status or label. I was just wondering if it was a symptom of her trying to frame me for a me too claim or something. It was so subtle but also very obvious that I noticed and figured it could be she was that type of person.

Looking back at the original post, I don't see anything wrong with her in any way.

As far as the movie, it is a Crime Drama. She probably thought you'd like that. The rape just happened to be the crime in the back drop of the movie. She is probably more excited about a "hero" catching the bad guy who hurt a woman.

Ditch the PUA "Frame" BS. Frame is nothing more than the context of any particular situation you are in at any given moment. Whoever is in the lead in the situation is the one who owns the "frame". It is a moment by moment thing. A man who "holds his frame" is just a guy who is a natural leader in most situations (or contexts) that he finds himself in. But if the context is changing a baby's diaper then there is not problem with the woman having the frame. She can have all those "frames" she wants in that case as far as I am concerned. If you think you always have to be the one holding the frame then the woman is going to start complaining that you are one of those guys who always has to be in charge and always has to be "right",...she will interpret that as you being insecure and dump you,....and it is true that guys like that are insecure,...we call them Control Freaks. There is an amount of balance and common sense that has to be applied to all things.

 

[BriBri]

Ditch the PUA "Frame" BS. Frame is nothing more than the context of any particular situation you are in at any given moment. Whoever is in the lead in the situation is the one who owns the "frame". It is a moment by moment thing. A man who "holds his frame" is just a guy who is a natural leader in most situations (or contexts) that he finds himself in. But if the context is changing a baby's diaper then there is not problem with the woman having the frame. She can have all those "frames" she wants in that case as far as I am concerned. If you think you always have to be the one holding the frame then the woman is going to start complaining that you are one of those guys who always has to be in charge and always has to be "right",...she will interpret that as you being insecure and dump you,....and it is true that guys like that are insecure,...we call them Control Freaks. There is an amount of balance and common sense that has to be applied to all things.

This is 100% correct. You control the 'frame' that you want to control to gain the benefit(s) that you want (typically sex). But, it also applies to buying a car/house and other interactions, even with men.

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

I could comment a novel here, I've had rape fantasy be a consistent issue with most newer women that I meet, like I have the chick's from my past that I bang, they are straight forward but it's something that I have dealt with a lot, I even tied a woman up the first time i met her, upon request and this led to my rule no bondage on first meet up.

I call it an issue, because engaging in risqué sex and rape fantasy kind of go hand in hand, like public sex will always have an undertone element of rape to it, the taboo.

I would imagine this woman, based on my own experiences, also regularly does things that are taboo so she can get a high off it, like shop lifting or maybe she's got a bf at home and is with you, if she is one of those seek the high types, run away and don't look back, they are decent to keep around until their high is picking at you, oh nvm FWB only is probably fine

 

[SargeMaximus]

Thanks for all the insight guys, I truly appreciate it.

One thing I’m having trouble with is incorporating things I think may help me without being too sensitive or going too far. It’s a calibration issue and I trust it will stabilize over time, especially if I can come here and check my work. Cheers

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

Thanks for all the insight guys, I truly appreciate it.

One thing I’m having trouble with is incorporating things I think may help me without being too sensitive or going too far. It’s a calibration issue and I trust it will stabilize over time, especially if I can come here and check my work. Cheers

This made me think of this, I thought it was funny and slightly relevant, women love the indifferent guy

 

[rjc149]

I have a female friend who was raped in college.

On the anniversary of the rape, she says she gets uncontrollably horny.

Go figure.

 

[SargeMaximus]

I have a female friend who was raped in college.

On the anniversary of the rape, she says she gets uncontrollably horny.

Go figure.

Craziness

 

[SargeMaximus]

This made me think of this, I thought it was funny and slightly relevant, women love the indifferent guy

Thanks, I will watch this later when I have the chance

 

[2Rocky]

I love Social Media for the Red Flags it displays....




buchona
buchona is the feminine of buchón (below)

Also:
A buchona is a strikingly good looking woman who tends to be the girlfriend/love interest of a gangster. Their every whim is attended to by the gangster and in turn she fulfills all his fantasies in return for the excessive lifestyle he gives her.

bu·chón Both Genders - Noun - Singular
ambitious person; Synonyms: ambicioso, codiciador, persona ambiciosa

buchón Adjective
gluttonous; Synonyms: comelón, goloso, comilón, glotón, hartón, tragador, comedor, tragón; Se dice de quien come mucho o desordenadamente. Tragón o tragona, glotón o glotona.\r\n
ambitious; Synonyms: ambicioso, de altos vuelos, de mucho vuelo; Que anhela fervientemente algo.
potbellied; Synonyms: barrigón, barrigudo, con el vientre hinchado, panzón; figurado. Se dice de la persona que tiene el vientre abultado, parecido al buche de una paloma buchona que hincha mucho el buche.
That hot chick in the telenovela is a buchona.

 

[bat soup]

Hey guys, just checking my work so to speak. Based on what happened last night with my fwb I figure nexting is the right course of action. but since I want to make sure I’m not over reacting I figured I’d post it here for your feedback:

The issue is this: after we had sex we watched some Netflix. Finishing the movie we watched the previous time. Then after it was over she suggested the movie “The Generals Daughter” which I have never seen before. Well the movie is about rape. So that was bizarre. Like, what made her think that was a good movie to watch with a fwb?

And then after the movie is over it was late so we went to bed and then she’s trying to get all frisky and sexual and I’m like “yo we just watched a movie about rape, I’m not turned on in the slightest right now” and she gets all pouty and angry. So yeah, not sure what any of that is about but I think it’s best to just not go there and stay far away.

Tell her that next time you will choose the film - then put on a documentary about Harvey Weinstein.