Fuked up tonight

[powersize]

Learn to be present and in the moment. Expect anything but don't anticipate anything. Play the long game and don't let anything get emotional.

A few months ago I had a woman that I'd set up a date with that cancelled at the last minute. No problem, I always expect something like this could happen, didn't over-react, just forgot about her. Fast forward to last week... she reached out, made a date, and banged her last Thursday. This actually happens some times.... I won't say it's common, typically flaky women just go away and you never see them again, but it does happen. But if you don't play the long game, it never will happen.

Man a night before the meeting I was already imagining fuking her at the same bed where I was sleeping. But yeah, lesson learned in a hard way. I should be cool regardless if she is with me tonight or not. I have already accepted the mentality that I do not care if the girl is fuking someone else apart of me. In fact I always try to assume that if she is not with me now than someone else is banging her. But who cares.
The funny thing that now I have that emotional feeling like after been dumped. Just avoid any kind contact with her but not in a weird way.

 

[powersize]

So I followed the SS folks advise and did not contact that girl once i fuked up and apologized. Been already 2 weeks. She did not reply me back and that is it. I deleted out conversation and muted her in IG so I do not see her stories and posts. I play it cool at work: ignore her completely and only when we bump up I can smile and have a little chat with her. Today we went on outing with my team and I did not really feel good cause she was there. Even though I played it cool and did not lose my frame - I kept the most of the evening quite among the friends. At the end of the evening she hugged my colleague (the married one) in front of me and again I played it cool like I do not give a fuk. So the bottom line here - am I going in the right direction? I am completely ignoring her by all means, and try to meet new girls even thought it is fuking hard cause we see each other pretty much every day at the office.

 

[tightsocks]

So there is that colleague from another threat that I wrote earlier. We were hanging out tonight, went for drinks, had some kino, kisses and etc. Once there was a time to leave I offered to go to my place and hopped to escalate. She refused and said she has periods and has to do some stuff in the morning. I said well, you just cannot come over without anything? (I know it sounds stupid now) So I was kinda pissed off with the whole situation, ordered a taxi which arrived in 1 min and left her on the street alone.

I do not know why I reacted like that and did what I did. Probably cause I haven't been out with her for 2 weeks and already had a plan to bang her tonight. I called her in 5 min after and asked if she got a taxi back home. And then apologised that I left her alone over the text.

Any ideas how to fix the situation or it is pretty much dead end?

I do not wanna be that needy guy who will chase and ask for forgiveness. I know I acted like an immature teenager and already apologised for the ****. (She did not reply on it).

The phone call after you made your great escape and apologizing ruined you in her eyes. Guaranteed.

 

[bat soup]

What do you folks think about when you lose your frame cause of the girl instead of apologizing you flip the script, back off and wait for her to apologize for making you act like that?

Don't wait for her. Forget her.

 

[powersize]

Don't wait for her. Forget her.

Trying. But it becomes toxic at work now. I have been completely ignoring her for the last 2 weeks. Yesterday we went out as a team and had some drinks. Once she got drunk she had some small talk with me. At the end she gave a hug to my friend who is married. I played it cool but in general whole evening I was rather quite. She texted me at work via corporate chat this week and I played it cool.
Today I texted her asking why she hit my leg on the way home. Read and no reply. Than I texted “you better watch out your ass cause I will remember it” she replied and told me that wanted to bother me.
What I am thinking to do - to stop that ignorance at work and play it like nothing happened before. Cause my problem that I act different when she is around and not around. Basically I am quite once she is close.

 

[bat soup]

Trying. But it becomes toxic at work now. I have been completely ignoring her for the last 2 weeks. Yesterday we went out as a team and had some drinks. Once she got drunk she had some small talk with me. At the end she gave a hug to my friend who is married. I played it cool but in general whole evening I was rather quite. She texted me at work via corporate chat this week and I played it cool.
Today I texted her asking why she hit my leg on the way home. Read and no reply. Than I texted “you better watch out our ass cause I will remember it” she replied and told me that wanted to bother me.
What I am thinking to do - to stop that ignorance at work and play it like nothing happened before. Cause my problem that I act different when she is around and not around. Basically I am quite once she is close.

This is exactly why you should avoid getting involved with women at work, unless they are super cooperative. All of this attention you're giving her (positive or negative) is feeding her ego. Meanwhile, it's distracting you from your work and could potentially cause you problems with HR.

I think you'd be better off just writing this woman off completely at this point. Don't send her any more text messages and forget about her. Be polite, as you would with anyone else at work, but don't consider her "special" or significant in any way. Because she's not.

 

[powersize]

This is exactly why you should avoid getting involved with women at work, unless they are super cooperative. All of this attention you're giving her (positive or negative) is feeding her ego. Meanwhile, it's distracting you from your work and could potentially cause you problems with HR.

I think you'd be better off just writing this woman off completely at this point. Don't send her any more text messages and forget about her. Be polite, as you would with anyone else at work, but don't consider her "special" or significant in any way. Because she's not.

I found once I act cool, talk a lot and make jokes when she is around - like I usually do with my male colleagues her face look like mine yesterday and she is kinda quite.
It sounds strange but I get anger when she is around and have fun. It is probably my ego.

 

[bat soup]

I found once I act cool, talk a lot and make jokes when she is around - like I usually do with my male colleagues her face look like mine yesterday and she is kinda quite.
It sounds strange but I get anger when she is around and have fun. It is probably my ego.

The problem is that you care. This is why you should avoid "getting to know" a woman before she proves that she's worth getting to know (by cooperating). If you quickly make a move right at the beginning and she rejects you, then you won't care too much because at this point she's still just a random stranger. If you spend time hanging out, talking and getting to know her, then by the time you get rejected you're already emotionally invested and it stings a lot more.

 

[powersize]

The problem is that you care. This is why you should avoid "getting to know" a woman before she proves that she's worth getting to know (by cooperating). If you quickly make a move right at the beginning and she rejects you, then you won't care too much because at this point she's still just a random stranger. If you spend time hanging out, talking and getting to know her, then by the time you get rejected you're already emotionally invested and it stings a lot more.

Yes, like I approached during this week a couple of girls on the street and got some contacts. 2 did not reply - who cares, at that point I invested nothing. Had ONS with a chick a couple of weeks ago - than went busy for 2 weeks and once I contacted her - she flaked straight away like "Lol, you texted me after 3 weeks" - next, I did not invest a lot.

This chick from the threat - I went for a drink first, that on 2nd meeting we had some drinks at her place - no sex at night, just kiss. Next day we traveled together the whole weekend and had sex at the hotel (this is where I got the attachment). After that she flaked 2 times my invite, and then reached out and wanted to meet. Invited her to my place where we had sex the same night and in the morning. And the last meeting was when I lost my frame.

Your advice is actually what AMS says - do not meet girls too often cause you will get attachment.

By cooperating do you mean when she accepts an offer to meet or when things get physical?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

In fact today she told me that she has a boyfriend back in her home country (while I fuked her already 3 times since she moved to my country). She also told me that all her male friends in her home country wanted to fuk her and that she feels the same with me.

You should have said "And...what's the problem with that?"

 

[powersize]

You should have said "And...what's the problem with that?"

Well, I played like it is not such a big deal for me

 

[powersize]

Ok folks, decided to write some update and hear your opinion here:

At the end of August I went NC with that girl - no text, no attention at work. Pretty much acted like she does not exist.

After 1 month we accidentally met at the club - she was dancing with some dude, I acted like I did not see her. I was on my way to toilet when someone pulled my hand from behind - it was her. We danced, I could touch her, she told me “why I ignore her and stuff like that”. Than she introduced me to her friends where that dude was. So wewere handing out all together, she told me she and that dude have a competition who will kiss more partners at that club, I did not react. Than at some point she told me she needs to take that friend dude and dance with him - cause some girl is too annoying approaching him. I said “Go then”. Turned away and walked away. After 20 min I went home. She texted me first time in 2 months asking where did I go eventually, cause she was looking for me.

After that ina couple of days I texted her and we met after work. Went to the bar, drunk some beer, and talked that we should not play that ghosting game cause it is toxic at work. It melted some ice and in general the evening was nice, we kissed at the end.

After that in a week or so - I asked her out on some trampoline place, she agreed.

We went there yesterday. It was fun and and at some point we played question game with sexual topics. And it gave me some good light of who she truly is:

So folks - she has bf back to her home country:
- while still living there and dating him, she had sex with other dudes
- she had sex with other colleagues at her work at her home country
- she mostly has sex nowadays with her male friends
- last weekend she told me she had some visitors at her place, and she told me she slept with one friend on Sunday

She also asked me about my sexual life nowadays - I told her I am seeing other girls.

After that we went to her place and got some beers and pizza. I wanted to escalate but she told me not today, I am kinda tired after all this 4 days drinking and partying. I tried a couple of times more - still no. So I played it cool - kissed her and went home.

I do not have the same feeling I had at the very beginning - so I do not care if she fuks someone else. But at the same time I do not wanna be the orbiter or the one who initiates. In fact after I overreacted in August - she never initiated or texted like she used to before.

So what do you guys think - should I pursue her more (let’s say in a week or two invite her to my place) - or I am already her another orbiter, or simply with this one the juice ain’t worth squeezing?

I am cold approaching currently, have some results - but no lays so far.

 

[RickTheToad]

So there is that colleague from another threat that I wrote earlier. We were hanging out tonight, went for drinks, had some kino, kisses and etc. Once there was a time to leave I offered to go to my place and hopped to escalate. She refused and said she has periods and has to do some stuff in the morning. I said well, you just cannot come over without anything? (I know it sounds stupid now) So I was kinda pissed off with the whole situation, ordered a taxi which arrived in 1 min and left her on the street alone.

I do not know why I reacted like that and did what I did. Probably cause I haven't been out with her for 2 weeks and already had a plan to bang her tonight. I called her in 5 min after and asked if she got a taxi back home. And then apologised that I left her alone over the text.

Any ideas how to fix the situation or it is pretty much dead end?

I do not wanna be that needy guy who will chase and ask for forgiveness. I know I acted like an immature teenager and already apologised for the ****. (She did not reply on it).

Shouldn't be fvcking around with a co-worker. Nothing good can come of this. Back off and let things be.

 

[powersize]

She is fun only. If you persue her these types of girls you have to escalate with dominance.
She likely into some kinky stuff. Have fun with it and dont get attached.
Is she into girls?
While escalating tell her to have a girlfriend along with and they can take turns sucking you.

I personally like non prudish type girls. Prudes are fcking boring.
When a chic tells you no secs. The next time Keep all dialouge purely sexual until blowout.
IMO when they are turning your dic down the frame is already lost. Next

I do consider her purely for sex and fun now. Do not think she is bisexual, however she asked me if I ever wanna try 3some and how it is gonna be.
Indeed you are right - all sex I had with her, was when I dominated.

So I guess here it is kinda simple - I ask her next week to my place and if she flakes - than simple next.

 

[powersize]

You can do it.
Tell her you want to choke her a little with a collar while you bust her pubic bone with yours.

I promise you she will see you in a different light. Haha

Haha, man good stuff.

She told me she never done bj and want to try, but with some special taste gel. I guess it is a good start to play around with

 

[bat soup]

So there is that colleague from another threat that I wrote earlier. We were hanging out tonight, went for drinks, had some kino, kisses and etc. Once there was a time to leave I offered to go to my place and hopped to escalate. She refused and said she has periods and has to do some stuff in the morning. I said well, you just cannot come over without anything? (I know it sounds stupid now) So I was kinda pissed off with the whole situation, ordered a taxi which arrived in 1 min and left her on the street alone.

I do not know why I reacted like that and did what I did. Probably cause I haven't been out with her for 2 weeks and already had a plan to bang her tonight. I called her in 5 min after and asked if she got a taxi back home. And then apologised that I left her alone over the text.

Any ideas how to fix the situation or it is pretty much dead end?

I do not wanna be that needy guy who will chase and ask for forgiveness. I know I acted like an immature teenager and already apologised for the ****. (She did not reply on it).

It's not your fault. She was giving you BS. But certainly it's always better to avoid getting upset and saying something you'll regret later.

Women often do stuff like this as a deliberate strategy to avoid cooperating whilst making it look like it's your fault.

Apologizing is probably also a mistake.

 

[powersize]

It's not your fault. She was giving you BS. But certainly it's always better to avoid getting upset and saying something you'll regret later.

Women often do stuff like this as a deliberate strategy to avoid cooperating whilst making it look like it's your fault.

Apologizing is probably also a mistake.

I know man. If I ever have such situations again - I will play it cool and pull back a little after.

Was more wondering about your folks opinion regarding my latest update that I made today after pretty much 3 months

 

[typical]

I know man. If I ever have such situations again - I will play it cool and pull back a little after.

Was more wondering about your folks opinion regarding my latest update that I made today after pretty much 3 months

Sounds like things can be salvaged BUT only if you can keep it to no strings attached fun and only if it involves kinky sex and her bringing over her girlfriends for you to fu(k.

Also moving on from today don’t try to seduce any woman from work .... the trouble is not worth it.

 

[powersize]

Sounds like things can be salvaged BUT only if you can keep it to no strings attached fun and only if it involves kinky sex and her bringing over her girlfriends for you to fu(k.

Also moving on from today don’t try to seduce any woman from work .... the trouble is not worth it.

Do you really think she will be cool if I bang her gf?

 

[typical]

Do you really think she will be cool if I bang her gf?

You tell me man. You’re the one talking and sleeping with her ? How open minded is she ?