How did your Relationship End?

[Georgepithyou]

I was watching an AMS video and he mentioned that women would go cold and distant when they want a man to leave.

All my breakups happened because she drifted away emotionally from me just like AMS said.

So it got me thinking has anyone broken up with a woman for any other reason? Or did she do the breaking up? Women my age don't ever break up in person it would always be over text.

 

[mjb3617]

I ended it because I could tell she was losing interest. I was definitely a rebound or side guy. She played the victim card when I did it and I just told her to go back to her ex eventually. That got me blocked so I guess I hit a nerve.

 

[Georgepithyou]

I ended it because I could tell she was losing interest. I was definitely a rebound or side guy. She played the victim card when I did it and I just told her to go back to her ex eventually. That got me blocked so I guess I hit a nerve.

I went NC when i noticed her losing interest. I was thinking it would get her interested in me again, but she just went ghost and started dating another guy.

 

[Serenity]

Those with lower self-esteem will do that. My first girlfriend was straight up with me, didn't bullsh!t and leave me hanging, I can respect that. It was over text, but I was in another city for a seasonal job so I wasn't available in person.

Another girlfriend who lasted a very short time got very cold and distant, I know for a fact her self-esteem was low and she avoided the confrontation. I noticed though and forced the confrontation, she broke down and broke up. I don't care that she was the one who broke up, I just wanted to end the uncertainty. This was over a phone call because she had been coming up with excuses for about a week to avoid seeing me. I called her asking her what the fvck was going on, she came clean and that was that.

 

[jaymbrs]

She was untrusting of me. No matter what I said or did, she always thought I was seeing other women. I thought for a second that maybe I played the abundance role too long into the relationship that it messed her up. Either way I sent her packing. I couldn't deal with it anymore.

 

[Georgepithyou]

She was untrusting of me. No matter what I said or did, she always thought I was seeing other women. I thought for a second that maybe I played the abundance role too long into the relationship that it messed her up. Either way I sent her packing. I couldn't deal with it anymore.

Ironically women like this tend to be the ones who cheat, but they project their insecurities onto you.

Another girlfriend who lasted a very short time got very cold and distant, I know for a fact her self-esteem was low and she avoided the confrontation. I noticed though and forced the confrontation, she broke down and broke up. I don't care that she was the one who broke up, I just wanted to end the uncertainty. This was over a phone call because she had been coming up with excuses for about a week to avoid seeing me. I called her asking her what the fvck was going on, she came clean and that was that.

I feel like you did the right thing, Going NC would reward that type of behaviour. She would just think i can start acting cold and distant with ever guy and he will dissapear hassle free.

 

[AttackFormation]

Ironically women like this tend to be the ones who cheat, but they project their insecurities onto you.

This is actually statistically true too. On the Big Five Factors personality model, people who score lower on Agreeableness (of which trust is a subfactor) have higher rates of infidelity.

It makes sense too logically. A hypothetical being that doesnt know betrayal and duplicity wouldnt suspect those things in others, because their own mind doesnt know them. But those who engage in betrayal and duplicity are familiar with those concepts, and suspect others of being as two faced and treacherous as they are.

 

[Serenity]

I feel like you did the right thing, Going NC would reward that type of behaviour. She would just think i can start acting cold and distant with ever guy and he will dissapear hassle free.

Sure, that's a point too, but my motive was more selfish than this. I absolutely hate to leave things hanging unresolved, I hate the elephant in the room. That sh!t is toxic to have nagging in the back of my mind, if the other person won't make a clear decision then I will make it for them. One way or another I want such things settled ASAP so I can move on with life, whether that is with or without them.

A good friend of mine took waaaay longer to force a resolution. His girlfriend of almost 10 years "took a break". From what I heard through my social circle she was out partying and hanging out with another dude (they're together now, with a child). My friend kept living in the hope she'd come back and damn near tore himself apart psychologically over this uncertainty that lasted almost 2 months. It got so bad that he stopped eating and literally fainted while at work. After that he was receptive to talk about it with me and I told him it's practically over already, she just doesn't have the courage to be clear about it. I served him some other pieces of wisdom too. Anyways, he got over it shortly after our conversation and pulled himself back together nicely.

 

[RickTheToad]

I was watching an AMS video and he mentioned that women would go cold and distant when they want a man to leave.

All my breakups happened because she drifted away emotionally from me just like AMS said.

So it got me thinking has anyone broken up with a woman for any other reason? Or did she do the breaking up? Women my age don't ever break up in person it would always be over text.

All different ways. Many times, they've reached out to me later to say "hi", but I never responded. My current GF thought I was sick when I was finding it enjoyable to see texts from ex's seeing how I was doing and never responding. With my ex-wife, she went too far and pushed too much that I just filed for divorce and convinced her that we should separate so she would voluntarily leave the home (legal strategy). She tried to come back, but I already filed for divorce and moved her crap into the garage. A couple of times, two really hot ones called me to break up, I just said, okay take care. Then either said or texted later, you're not going to fight for me? One I responded with, I do not stay with someone who clearly doesn't know what she had. Take care! I also had several that went radio silent. One, only one, did I simp.. This was four years ago.. I was head over heels on this one. I mean batty. She acted strange that weekend, then texted me a few days later after I called her she wanted a break. I said sure. Next day I texted her again, then she wanted to break up. I called, she said she was with a friend. She just said she needed some time. I just said, that's not going to work for me, so I wish you the best and I will really miss you. She said the same. She reached out two weeks later to say "Hi", I never responded. Hurt too much. I vowed to never allow myself to get into a situation like that again.

So, it really does run the gambit. The best would be if the are waivering, just say take care and move on. If they did something really bad or disrespected you in any way, you 86 them immediately. Whatever you do, never take them back. Even a fvck buddy. NEVER.

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

A kid in a store thought I was her son lol, it was dead right then and there

 

[Georgepithyou]

Then either said or texted later, you're not going to fight for me? One I responded with, I do not stay with someone who clearly doesn't know what she had. Take care! I also had several that went radio silent

I don't get why women do this, they act cold and distant, we break up then they act like it's our fault. In my parents generation when couples had problems they would solve it not end the relationship as soon as something bad happens.

Women end relationships with perfectly good men for such silly reasons.

Sure, that's a point too, but my motive was more selfish than this. I absolutely hate to leave things hanging unresolved, I hate the elephant in the room. That sh!t is toxic to have nagging in the back of my mind, if the other person won't make a clear decision then I will make it for them. One way or another I want such things settled ASAP so I can move on with life, whether that is with or without them.

It makes perfect sense, like interviewing for a job and not ever hearing back.

A good friend of mine took waaaay longer to force a resolution. His girlfriend of almost 10 years "took a break". From what I heard through my social circle she was out partying and hanging out with another dude (they're together now, with a child). My friend kept living in the hope she'd come back and damn near tore himself apart psychologically over this uncertainty that lasted almost 2 months. It got so bad that he stopped eating and literally fainted while at work. After that he was receptive to talk about it with me and I told him it's practically over already, she just doesn't have the courage to be clear about it. I served him some other pieces of wisdom too. Anyways, he got over it shortly after our conversation and pulled himself back together nicely.

I seriously don't understand how any human could be so cruel, to be with someone for ten years and toss them to the side like a used washcloth. That's a borderline sociopath.

 

[Serenity]

I seriously don't understand how any human could be so cruel, to be with someone for ten years and toss them to the side like a used washcloth. That's a borderline sociopath.

I never liked her that much, she's self-centered. Wouldn't be any use telling him while they were still together, he wouldn't have really understood it. It was a case of waiting to be there for him when sh!t hits the fan. I never could wrap my head around why they were together in the first place, to me they were obviously not a good match. One thing should be said though, my friend was never a doormat, he did what he did even if she got annoyed at it. I think that's what finally drove her away, she wanted someone she could control more easily. She has that in the new guy, I've met him and he seems rather naive to me. She did my friend a favor (in the long term) and my friend sees it that way too.

She actually did try to crawl back when my friend finally had enough and stopped trying to fix things/talk to her. She had ignored his attempts at talking it out for several weeks, when he finally had enough then all of a sudden she's the one who wanted to talk. He ignored her, the same way she had ignored him. It was over.

I don't get why women do this, they act cold and distant, we break up then they act like it's our fault.

One word: ego.

Their ego can't handle the fact that he doesn't worship her anymore, even if she has no intention of continuing the relationship. It makes her feel powerful to know the man still pines for her. It's sick and twisted, but such is the ways of ego.

 

[RickTheToad]

I don't get why women do this, they act cold and distant, we break up then they act like it's our fault. In my parents generation when couples had problems they would solve it not end the relationship as soon as something bad happens.

Women end relationships with perfectly good men for such silly reasons.




It makes perfect sense, like interviewing for a job and not ever hearing back.




I seriously don't understand how any human could be so cruel, to be with someone for ten years and toss them to the side like a used washcloth. That's a borderline sociopath.

Simple. Most females are solipsistic.

 

[BriBri]

Simple. Most females are solipsistic.

This is one of the key reasons I am in the process of ending my 23 year marriage. While focusing on my career (more like slavery to 'big business') and also trying to be an attentive, providing husband, I unknowingly was living a truly beta existence. I should have realized it 'way back when' during our marriage ceremony when my wife was insistent on adding "...and to always respect you as an individual..." to our wedding vows. After observing my wife migrating into her bubble of self-centered lunacy over the past few years, turning into a land whale, and celebrating her 'strong independent womanhood', I said "enough is enough" and filed back in April. Now I focus on myself and flirt with women as much as I damn-well please. No more walking on egg shells for me!

 

[oldmanofthesea]

You should break up with a woman because you don't value her any more, not just because you sense she doesn't want you anymore.

I break up with women for many reasons - I lose attraction for them, I find I don't like their personality, she doesn't invest in me, she doesn't treat me well, I'm low priority for her, she's high drama, too jealous, too insecure, too many red flags, you name it. Many reasons.

 

[RickTheToad]

This is one of the key reasons I am in the process of ending my 23 year marriage. While focusing on my career (more like slavery to 'big business') and also trying to be an attentive, providing husband, I unknowingly was living a truly beta existence. I should have realized it 'way back when' during our marriage ceremony when my wife was insistent on adding "...and to always respect you as an individual..." to our wedding vows. After observing my wife migrating into her bubble of self-centered lunacy over the past few years, turning into a land whale, and celebrating her 'strong independent womanhood', I said "enough is enough" and filed back in April. Now I focus on myself and flirt with women as much as I damn-well please. No more walking on egg shells for me!

I feel for you dude.

 

[SW15]

This is one of the key reasons I am in the process of ending my 23 year marriage. While focusing on my career (more like slavery to 'big business') and also trying to be an attentive, providing husband, I unknowingly was living a truly beta existence. I should have realized it 'way back when' during our marriage ceremony when my wife was insistent on adding "...and to always respect you as an individual..." to our wedding vows. After observing my wife migrating into her bubble of self-centered lunacy over the past few years, turning into a land whale, and celebrating her 'strong independent womanhood', I said "enough is enough" and filed back in April. Now I focus on myself and flirt with women as much as I damn-well please. No more walking on egg shells for me!

Cheers to new beginnings!

 

[2Rocky]

 

[The Diver]

Those with lower self-esteem will do that.

she avoided the confrontation.

I don't think they are doing it because of low self-esteem.
As you said, she avoided confrontation.

Women, in general, use their femininity to get what they want in life.
They are not used to fight and be aggressive to get what they want.
And therefore, confrontation is alien to them. They don't know how to deal with that side of life.
Also, confrontation with their BF when they breakup with him, can sometimes get aggressive and violent ( if she witnessed this side in you),and that's scared them physically. ( and this is one of the reasons some of them prefer to break up on the phone and not face to face )

And so, they play it covertly, become cold and distant in the hope you will get the hint, and leave quietly and without too much dramas.

 

[Georgepithyou]

And so, they play it covertly, become cold and distant in the hope you will get the hint, and leave quietly and without too much dramas.

It always backfires, the guy thinks they need to pursue them more if they pull back. Before they know it they have a stalker on their hands. It drives a man insane not getting the proper closure.

Women, in general, use their femininity to get what they want in life.
They are not used to fight and be aggressive to get what they want.
And therefore, confrontation is alien to them. They don't know how to deal with that side of life.
Also, confrontation with their BF when they breakup with him, can sometimes get aggressive and violent ( if she witnessed this side in you),and that's scared them physically. ( and this is one of the reasons some of them prefer to break up on the phone and not face to face )

I get why they do it but personally i see that as really immature and childish. I wish women would realise confrontation is a normal part of life and you can't just run away everytime something doesn't go your way, but women do have near infinite options so it doesn't matter to them.