Old SS or New SS?

[Theoneaboveall]

Hey guys,I just wanted your opinion about how to escalate during dating as I have come at a dilemma.
The old SS( when anti-dump was the OG) used to see the following during dating phase 1) to see how the chemistry between you and the girl is 2) whether her interest in you is high or not 3) how flexible and compromising you both(mostly her) are to each other.And since the goal here was a LTR with a HB,so there was to be no physical sexual contact for the first two months.
The new SS preaches to go kino and physical from the get go. If she has sex,she is already interested and invested. And then, to see where you want to steer things from there.
The reason I am asking is because I will be going on a date with a girl I like soon. She is really pretty and has been single for past three years and maybe never had a bf,she hasn't gone on a date in the past three years also( we are a relatively conservative country). She has a good friends group of girls also and is not much active on any social media.
I was the one who asked her out but she has always shown very high IOIs,which even my friends have commented on.
So guys,which one of the two ways should I approach this? I think kissing on the first date may be possible but should I go for it or not?
Looking forward to your replies.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

Different women have different expectations and desires when it comes to s*x. Don't think that because a girl seems like an old-fashioned one, that she doesn't want to sleep with you right away, or kiss on the first or third date or whatever. The simple truth is that you have to go at each girl's pace, and you do this by constantly giving her the opportunity to be intimate, then let her decide when she is ready and for what she is ready for. This is done by escalating gradually, and giving her the ability to explain away anything that happens as being your idea and not hers.

Early-on, I lost women because I didn't escalate fast enough. Some of those same women might not have actually slept with me by the second or third date, had I escalated properly, but they wanted to know that I actually wanted it and they know this through my escalations (or lack of them). I don't have a rule as to when sex should happen, but I just want to see steady progress in her response to my physical/romantic escalation. Some very cautious and conservative girls may take several months to feel comfortable with you enough to sleep with you and get into a relationship, and if I feel a girl is high quality and LTR material, I will continue to see her for that length of time and be patient, but only if I am seeing some progress toward sex and some investment from her during that time. Otherwise I will eject when I see the intimacy stop progressing.

Even if you do have an old fashioned and cautious/conservative girl, escalating attempts from you should not be seen as a bad thing to her. The only way it would be bad is if you aren't reading her responses and adjusting accordingly. Example: After things are going well on a first date, you start the escalation with a touch to the back of her elbow while you are both laughing at a joke, and she moves her arm away. Ok too soon. That's not a problem yet. But if you then try touching her leg 5 minutes later, you've not adjusted properly to her first response.

If a girl likes you, and your escalations are calibrated, she will not eject, even if she isn't yet receptive to your escalations. So there is really no risk in escalating. The only risk is in not escalating and having her feel rejected.

You can be successful by playing the long game and being more flirty without much touching until the sexual tension builds to an unbearable level and then bam, but it's a lot more difficult to pull off. You have to be able to read all their signs really well and it usually works best when you know she sees you as higher value than you see her.

 

[Fruitbat]

Just get it out as soon as possible and shout “hey baby, suck THIS”
Works every time.

 

[Theoneaboveall]

Different women have different expectations and desires when it comes to s*x. Don't think that because a girl seems like an old-fashioned one, that she doesn't want to sleep with you right away, or kiss on the first or third date or whatever. The simple truth is that you have to go at each girl's pace, and you do this by constantly giving her the opportunity to be intimate, then let her decide when she is ready and for what she is ready for. This is done by escalating gradually, and giving her the ability to explain away anything that happens as being your idea and not hers.

Early-on, I lost women because I didn't escalate fast enough. Some of those same women might not have actually slept with me by the second or third date, had I escalated properly, but they wanted to know that I actually wanted it and they know this through my escalations (or lack of them). I don't have a rule as to when sex should happen, but I just want to see steady progress in her response to my physical/romantic escalation. Some very cautious and conservative girls may take several months to feel comfortable with you enough to sleep with you and get into a relationship, and if I feel a girl is high quality and LTR material, I will continue to see her for that length of time and be patient, but only if I am seeing some progress toward sex and some investment from her during that time. Otherwise I will eject when I see the intimacy stop progressing.

Even if you do have an old fashioned and cautious/conservative girl, escalating attempts from you should not be seen as a bad thing to her. The only way it would be bad is if you aren't reading her responses and adjusting accordingly. Example: After things are going well on a first date, you start the escalation with a touch to the back of her elbow while you are both laughing at a joke, and she moves her arm away. Ok too soon. That's not a problem yet. But if you then try touching her leg 5 minutes later, you've not adjusted properly to her first response.

If a girl likes you, and your escalations are calibrated, she will not eject, even if she isn't yet receptive to your escalations. So there is really no risk in escalating. The only risk is in not escalating and having her feel rejected.

You can be successful by playing the long game and being more flirty without much touching until the sexual tension builds to an unbearable level and then bam, but it's a lot more difficult to pull off. You have to be able to read all their signs really well and it usually works best when you know she sees you as higher value than you see her.

Thanks for the insightful answer.

 

[bat soup]

Just get it out as soon as possible and shout “hey baby, suck THIS”
Works every time.

Is this what you mean?

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Hey guys,I just wanted your opinion about how to escalate during dating as I have come at a dilemma.
The old SS( when anti-dump was the OG) used to see the following during dating phase 1) to see how the chemistry between you and the girl is 2) whether her interest in you is high or not 3) how flexible and compromising you both(mostly her) are to each other.And since the goal here was a LTR with a HB,so there was to be no physical sexual contact for the first two months.
The new SS preaches to go kino and physical from the get go. If she has sex,she is already interested and invested. And then, to see where you want to steer things from there.
The reason I am asking is because I will be going on a date with a girl I like soon. She is really pretty and has been single for past three years and maybe never had a bf,she hasn't gone on a date in the past three years also( we are a relatively conservative country). She has a good friends group of girls also and is not much active on any social media.
I was the one who asked her out but she has always shown very high IOIs,which even my friends have commented on.
So guys,which one of the two ways should I approach this? I think kissing on the first date may be possible but should I go for it or not?
Looking forward to your replies.

I always thought it was rubbish new theories or ebooks and game products all too often. I see things differently. The game has changed as has the culture and women.

You pretty much got to run your process and actually test it.

Take D out and tell her what to do. I lead. She follows or #next

 

[zekko]

So guys,which one of the two ways should I approach this? I think kissing on the first date may be possible but should I go for it or not?

I'm not sure if you're asking if you can go for a kiss or for sex?
If it's the former, I'd say definitely go for the kiss. All she can do is rebuff you. She expects you to try, doing so will just confirm in her mind that you are a man. As for going for sex, not really interested in answering that, not enough information.

I think old SS used to talk about kino more so than now. Kino was always a major part of the recipe, then #MeToo came along and made everything more risky. Look at Andrew Cuomo.

 

[Theoneaboveall]

I'm not sure if you're asking if you can go for a kiss or for sex?
If it's the former, I'd say definitely go for the kiss. All she can do is rebuff you. She expects you to try, doing so will just confirm in her mind that you are a man. As for going for sex, not really interested in answering that, not enough information.

I think old SS used to talk about kino more so than now. Kino was always a major part of the recipe, then #MeToo came along and made everything more risky. Look at Andrew Cuomo.

Thatnks for your reply!
And I was talking about kiss only. And yes old SS used to talk a lot more about kino but I read anti- dumps machine and he had written not to be physical for the first two months,so that's why I was asking.

 

[zekko]

And I was talking about kiss only. And yes old SS used to talk a lot more about kino but I read anti- dumps machine and he had written not to be physical for the first two months,so that's why I was asking.

I recall that. Anti-dump was quite popular, and had a lot of good ideas. I don't agree with him on this though. I think if a guy holds back from being physical for two months, the girl is liable to categorize him as timid and hesitant, not having the will to act or lead. Now if a guy truly, authentically doesn't want to kiss her, I guess that's a different thing. But if a guy doesn't at least want to kiss a girl, I'm not sure why he would want to go out with her, unless he's only interested in her as a friend.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Forget all the societal constructions ...... you kiss as soon as you fell the opportunity presents itself

Begin by subtly touching her frequently , hold her hand , pull her closer to you ( they love this ) ,kiss her ,lead her , f@ck her

Once the sex is out of the way you should hold the position of power and she should submiss providing you don't F@ck it up by being too needy

 

[Imarriedawinner71]

Hey guys,I just wanted your opinion about how to escalate during dating as I have come at a dilemma.
The old SS( when anti-dump was the OG) used to see the following during dating phase 1) to see how the chemistry between you and the girl is 2) whether her interest in you is high or not 3) how flexible and compromising you both(mostly her) are to each other.And since the goal here was a LTR with a HB,so there was to be no physical sexual contact for the first two months.
The new SS preaches to go kino and physical from the get go. If she has sex,she is already interested and invested. And then, to see where you want to steer things from there.
The reason I am asking is because I will be going on a date with a girl I like soon. She is really pretty and has been single for past three years and maybe never had a bf,she hasn't gone on a date in the past three years also( we are a relatively conservative country). She has a good friends group of girls also and is not much active on any social media.
I was the one who asked her out but she has always shown very high IOIs,which even my friends have commented on.
So guys,which one of the two ways should I approach this? I think kissing on the first date may be possible but should I go for it or not?
Looking forward to your replies.

Old SS.Closely watching interest levels with the ultimate goal being marriage.Stay celibate to increase value and interest.