Why some women gets mad when you say to her: "I don't trust someone blindly, I judge by behaviors"

[Blacksheep]

It's something I constantly observed with most women I had dates. They feel annoyed by the fact when you say you don't trust anyone by their words... Only by their behaviors.

Is that because women unconsciously knows that most of times we can't trust in their words because they most of times will behave different than that?

It seems the same story: "Why you don't trust me, you should trust more into people... Love is about being vulnerable and bla bla bla..."

And there is one more: "Oh, I won't have to prove you that I'm worth of trust... If you don't trust me, I'm the wrong one."

This is a pattern that I could observe constantly on my past experiences.

What's wrong with trusting based on behaviors and attitudes?

At least for me, it's pure nonsense trusting someone that doesn't show to you he/she is worth your trust.

So I have some hypotheses:

- This is a sh1t test women use to do. But idk what they wanna achieve with that.
- People who say that, are usually the ones you should never trust, because they use it to try to fool you.
- Some kind of manipulation

This idea came at my mind, since that weird experience I had. Cause she said that and I realized that I used to heard that a lot of times on the past experiences.

 

[bat soup]

It's something I constantly observed with most women I had dates. They feel annoyed by the fact when you say you don't trust anyone by their words... Only by their behaviors.

Is that because women unconsciously knows that most of times we can't trust in their words because they most of times will behave different than that?

It seems the same story: "Why you don't trust me, you should trust more into people... Love is about being vulnerable and bla bla bla..."

And there is one more: "Oh, I won't have to prove you that I'm worth of trust... If you don't trust me, I'm the wrong one."

This is a pattern that I could observe constantly on my past experiences.

What's wrong with trusting based on behaviors and attitudes?

At least for me, it's pure nonsense trusting someone that doesn't show to you he/she is worth your trust.

So I have some hypotheses:

- This is a sh1t test women use to do. But idk what they wanna achieve with that.
- People who say that, are usually the ones you should never trust, because they use it to try to fool you.
- Some kind of manipulation

This idea came at my mind, since that weird experience I had. Cause she said that and I realized that I used to heard that a lot of times on the past experiences.

I don't think you should tell them your strategy, just implement it.

"Trust me" is a classic thing that conmen say. Anyone that tells you to trust them should be viewed with suspicion.

 

[Blacksheep]

I don't think you should tell them your strategy, just implement it.

"Trust me" is a classic thing that conmen say. Anyone that tells you to trust them should be viewed with suspicion.

You're right... And when they get to that talk and ask you, what should be a good response? Cause I usually just say that.

And this trust me is the biggest red flag I ever saw into people that lies or wants to manipulate. They cant prove their worth because they dont have it... So the only thing that last was trying to prove by words.

 

[SargeMaximus]

Logical analysis or explanations of logical analysis is annoying to women and most people

 

[Blacksheep]

because they need to be able to pull the wool over your eyes to feel secure in a relationship. its literally because they dont rely on trust in the way they need you to. They have the same mentality you have.

I can't get this idea of how they have the same mentality I have.

They say: you should risk and believe me without anything that could prove or show I'm worth it.

My view: Trust is built based on behaviors and attitudes. Not just by saying trust me.

 

[Blacksheep]

Because it eliminates her manipulation paradigm. She can’t convince you that “he’s just a friend” or how you should be doing this or that, or thinking this or that about her queenship credentials.

Agree with that.

Because "he's just a friend" most of the time is way more than that. And how could she prove that, if she knows it's a lie? The only way for that is finding an innocent guy that believes in fairy tales.

But when you say that, you are the one that have trust issues, that you don't trust anyone... and the same script I hear every time.

 

[Alvafe]

in a simple matter, you are telling then you don't trust what they say, and woman give a big importance to what is said not what is done, remember woman can hate other woman guts but are all kisses and hugs when close to each other.

also note, you can piss a person extremely well when you put they belives or they core opnions in check, example pointing out a liar is a liar will triiger then in prove they are not and piss then off, most important to people is to save face when you do or say something who put that in check you just made a enemy and some will risk they live to save face

 

[Blacksheep]

Yeah exactly what I was going to say.

whatever your "filter system" is, don't let them know about it. It's for you to analyze them. You might meet another Jezebel who will pretend
to live up to whatever your ideals are, just to get inside and manipulate and wreck havoc.

Don't tell them anything. Observe, ask questions and listen, they will reveal themselves.

Use the art of eliciting. Rather than tell them what you expect (from trust etc) elicit from them their values and just observe, take note. to read people you don't then share your notes with them.



Use neutral language if you don't want them to know what you think of their responses or if they are saying bull**** stuff to you about "you should trust blah blah". like simple "sure" (I love that and oddly it infuriates a lot of people) "sounds good" "ok great" "i hear you"

Great feedback and ideas! Thanks for that!

It's like a cop telling to a thief his strategy to catch a thief.

Have to keep that in mind. Because that could end up hurting me.

Basically, evaluate in silence... Make your own conclusions and decide whether or not to keep that person around.

 

[Blacksheep]

in a simple matter, you are telling then you don't trust what they say, and woman give a big importance to what is said not what is done, remember woman can hate other woman guts but are all kisses and hugs when close to each other.

also note, you can piss a person extremely well when you put they belives or they core opnions in check, example pointing out a liar is a liar will triiger then in prove they are not and piss then off, most important to people is to save face when you do or say something who put that in check you just made a enemy and some will risk they live to save face

That's true!

Thinking about that, its also a waste of time saying those things to someone. If someone is worth of trust, that person will show to you... If someone is already not worth of it, how saying that I don't trust he/she would change in anything.

This could only be a good idea if both could be transparent to clarify something that create some doubt... So you can ask for an explanation. But its also different than saying how do I trust someone.

Thanks for your feedback.

 

[Blacksheep]

Also be careful about revealing your hot buttons ie what irritates you. I really don't understand why people do this. Tell people what pisses you off and certain people will do it just to play with you.

Kept thinking about that. In some way I thought if I was open about it, maybe I could get that same transparency by the other person. But I just never realized that it never worked before.

 

[BadBoy89]

It's something I constantly observed with most women I had dates. They feel annoyed by the fact when you say you don't trust anyone by their words... Only by their behaviors.

Is that because women unconsciously knows that most of times we can't trust in their words because they most of times will behave different than that?

No its when TELL a woman that is when she feels annoyed.

Heck, if I was your business partner or even friend, I wouldn‘t trust you if you told me that. I would tell people “THIS guy is tricky, watch out,”

Basically just trust women until they give you a reason not to. Everyday I got outside women say one thing to look good and do whatever suits them. Its not a big deal.

A lot of you guys are sensitive and take things women so seriously. These women dont know what they want, they just follow society‘s customs and traditions.

 

[bat soup]

You're right... And when they get to that talk and ask you, what should be a good response? Cause I usually just say that.

And this trust me is the biggest red flag I ever saw into people that lies or wants to manipulate. They cant prove their worth because they dont have it... So the only thing that last was trying to prove by words.

I don't think you need to argue with them about it. You don't need to tell them that you don't believe them.

Just don't believe anything that a woman says unless her actions prove it.

 

[Blacksheep]

ive made this mistake as well. I was asked if I trusted someone and I said I trust them to be them. She didnt like that lol. I just felt like saying I trusted her for literally no reason (in fact, many reasons to not trust her) would make me come off as a total chump.

For me it also doesn't make sense to say I trust someone if I don't.

The thing is that, sometimes its best to lie than being honest. Mostly if you don't know who is the person you're talking with. It protect us from many problems.

Playing the game and pretending we are fool are the best tool for that.

 

[metalwater]

If she is placing you into a provider role, trust is key. If you will not then you are not.

If she is wanting you for excitement and sex only then you will not get this question because she doesn't care and or she doesn't consider that she needs to be trusted.

this issue/question helps to understand her opinion of you.

 

[bat soup]

A person that is trustworthy will show you through their actions, not demand that you trust them.

It's like when someone tells you "I'm your friend".

 

[dude99]

It's something I constantly observed with most women I had dates. They feel annoyed by the fact when you say you don't trust anyone by their words... Only by their behaviors.

Is that because women unconsciously knows that most of times we can't trust in their words because they most of times will behave different than that?

It seems the same story: "Why you don't trust me, you should trust more into people... Love is about being vulnerable and bla bla bla..."

And there is one more: "Oh, I won't have to prove you that I'm worth of trust... If you don't trust me, I'm the wrong one."

This is a pattern that I could observe constantly on my past experiences.

What's wrong with trusting based on behaviors and attitudes?

At least for me, it's pure nonsense trusting someone that doesn't show to you he/she is worth your trust.

So I have some hypotheses:

- This is a sh1t test women use to do. But idk what they wanna achieve with that.
- People who say that, are usually the ones you should never trust, because they use it to try to fool you.
- Some kind of manipulation

This idea came at my mind, since that weird experience I had. Cause she said that and I realized that I used to heard that a lot of times on the past experiences.

People who try to force you to trust them are untrustworthy. Period.

Best bet is to not even discuss trust with chicks. Keep the topics light

 

[IKO69]

It only bothers those who are emotionally manipulative/game players. Honest people shrug their shoulders because their actions prove their worth

 

[Blacksheep]

People who try to force you to trust them are untrustworthy. Period.

Best bet is to not even discuss trust with chicks. Keep the topics light

And now if you discuss with them, look this law approved here in Brazil last month. It's already being applied.

Article 147-B. Cause emotional damage to women that harms and disturbs their full development or that aims to degrade or control their actions, behaviors, beliefs and decisions, through threat, embarrassment, humiliation, manipulation, isolation, blackmail, ridicule, limitation of the right to go and come or any other means that harm your psychological health and self-determination:

Penalty - imprisonment, from 6 (six) months to 2 (two) years, and fine, if the conduct does not constitute a more serious crime.”

 

[Blacksheep]

If a woman is engaged for just sex, then it’s all a mute point. If you are trying to obtain a girlfriend, then you will NEVER stop even more intricate forms of manipulations.

If she is in the mindset to obtain a provider, weather it’s from you or your mindset, or because she is tired of being run through, you will need a much different school of thought and skills.

The idea that you have to continually “game” your girlfriend/wife is a fools errand. Most of her most effective forms of manipulation require no speech for her to institute anyway. The mere fact that you want to maintain the status quo of the relationship alone causes and sets you up for her manipulations.

Most are not even conscious of their actions and manipulations at the emotional level. As her desire wains (natural occurrence) she involuntarily seeks to get back to that level of stimulation.
This also incorporates the dualistic sexual strategy. Many women over the past centuries, through conviction, strived to maintain the relationship. Some were successful.

Couple this drop in desire, with modern social conditioning and only a choice handful instead of some, are capable of this because women mold to their environment. To game over that? You’re a damn fool. This is a much, much different skill set. You can grow older faster and die well before her. There are reasons. You continued your job and lived a life of utter fear at the biological level of loosing, but your life becomes about observing your partner and not about engaging life.

You, in effect, become her slave. Slave to her up and down emotional states, devised solely to manipulate. This is separate from her normal monthly female cycling. Do not confuse the two.

Damn, this is a good feedback.

About engaging in life I think a lot about it. You live playing those manipulation games and you end up without truly living live at whole. Not like on a dream, but doing something better than dealing with this crap.

The idea of relationship for me was to have a good partner to share good moments, to plan and grow together and to love and feel loved. But this, until now, Ive never found on a romantic relationship. The more I try, the more reality punch me in the face. I'm a fool believing that this could be possible in how those dynamics works. And I also feel sad with that.

 

[HaleyBaron]

It's something I constantly observed with most women I had dates. They feel annoyed by the fact when you say you don't trust anyone by their words... Only by their behaviors.

Is that because women unconsciously knows that most of times we can't trust in their words because they most of times will behave different than that?

It seems the same story: "Why you don't trust me, you should trust more into people... Love is about being vulnerable and bla bla bla..."

And there is one more: "Oh, I won't have to prove you that I'm worth of trust... If you don't trust me, I'm the wrong one."

This is a pattern that I could observe constantly on my past experiences.

What's wrong with trusting based on behaviors and attitudes?

At least for me, it's pure nonsense trusting someone that doesn't show to you he/she is worth your trust.

So I have some hypotheses:

- This is a sh1t test women use to do. But idk what they wanna achieve with that.
- People who say that, are usually the ones you should never trust, because they use it to try to fool you.
- Some kind of manipulation

This idea came at my mind, since that weird experience I had. Cause she said that and I realized that I used to heard that a lot of times on the past experiences.

You're exposing the game. Women don't operate like men. Don't say silly stuff like "I do this or that." At least stuff that makes her see that you are going by some internal rules that now she knows. You're suppose to let her figure you out, even if she's wrong. And if she's wrong, just treat her like a child.