Most guys on here focus on the wrong things

[Barrister]

For the first date/drinks -

My "Algorithm"

A former plate of mine and current close friend (yes its possible to have a close platonic female friend) gives me a hard time and calls my dating process an "Algorithm". She gives me shyte about it, but it most certainly works, and it also worked on her when I first started seeing her several...

www.sosuave.net

I am not a guy that goes clubbing as you are, but women are women and building sexual tension is still the same process.

I could do a follow up thread on what I do in between dates 1 and 2, and between dates 2 and 3 and how I contact/respond/communicate with women during that time

How often do you text in between date 1 and 2 where you have not smashed yet? Do you try to build rapport with light-hearted texting or shy away completely?

 

[Georgepithyou]

7 to 10 days????????

That is literally the worst advice i have ever heard in my life.

Funny thing is AMS also said to wait a week after you get her number to text her. In theory it does show that your "super busy" and it could work for DHV.

It's not something I've tried myself though, i usually just get them to text when they are home and we have light banter until i call them to organise the next date.

 

[RBK]

7-10 days is a horrible idea. I think a lot of AMS advice is bull**** personally. No woman in todays world with Tinder, Instagram etc is going to wait a week for you to text them.

 

[RBK]

How often do you text in between date 1 and 2 where you have not smashed yet? Do you try to build rapport with light-hearted texting or shy away completely?

I try to build a little rapport but don't overdue it. Use the 2/3 rule on texting in these situations but your goal should be setting up another date. Too much texting and you are going to enter the friend zone quickly.

 

[Glassguy]

How often do you text in between date 1 and 2 where you have not smashed yet? Do you try to build rapport with light-hearted texting or shy away completely?

I always tell them to text me when they made it home safely. If she has high interest, she will not only text me then, but she will also begin initiating nearly all communication.

I dont shy away completely because I will respond back to her texts when she reaches out. I keep it light hearted and one thing I NEVER do over text is try to sell myself or sell her on why she needs to see me again. I just go with the flow of her initiating the texts/calls. And I do not jump on and respond back right away. Give even things like a little text response time for her to build some anxiety over when you will respond.....of IF you will respond.

 

[RBK]

I always tell them to text me when they made it home safely. If she has high interest, she will not only text me then, but she will also begin initiating nearly all communication.

I usually do this as well but it's backfired a couple times and I think it may be a little needy. Depends on the girls interest level I think.

 

[Glassguy]

I usually do this as well but it's backfired a couple times and I think it may be a little needy. Depends on the girls interest level I think.

I just say "Hey shoot me a quick text to let me make it home ok since we've been drinking". Very nonchalant.

 

[RBK]

I just say "Hey shoot me a quick text to let me make it home ok since we've been drinking". Very nonchalant.

Whats your reply usually when she texts? "Sounds good, good night." ?

 

[Glassguy]

Whats your reply usually when she texts? "Sounds good, good night." ?

I wouldnt reply with anything.

I'd plan on picking her up when I told her I would. I would also go dead silent and see if she reaches out. If she did not, I would probably flake because at the end of the day she didnt confirm, didnt reach out and is showing low interest. So if she showed up after no further communication, she would show up alone.

Ive actually done this several times. Once I never heard back from the chick so I assume she didnt show up. The other times I got a text "I am here....are you on your way?"....to which I said "Sorry, I never heard back from you and totally forgot".

Flaking on women isnt the worst thing that can happen. More often than not it intensifies their interest if they sort of asked for it....meaning you werent chasing her and didnt care if you showed up or not.

But thats what I would do, but understand I would do that with the attitude of "I dont care if I hear back from her or not". And I truly wouldnt care.

Any woman with high interest will reach out to you. Thats a fact.

Dont reach out to her and you are going to either get one of two texts the day of or the day before the date:
"Sorry but I am not going to make it"
"Hey...havent heard from you....still good for tomorrow night?"

So sit back and see what she does. Remain still and calm. You hit the ball over the net, if she doesnt hit it back over, go find someone else to play with.

 

[RBK]

I wouldnt reply with anything.

I'd plan on picking her up when I told her I would. I would also go dead silent and see if she reaches out. If she did not, I would probably flake because at the end of the day she didnt confirm, didnt reach out and is showing low interest. So if she showed up after no further communication, she would show up alone.

Ive actually done this several times. Once I never heard back from the chick so I assume she didnt show up. The other times I got a text "I am here....are you on your way?"....to which I said "Sorry, I never heard back from you and totally forgot".

Flaking on women isnt the worst thing that can happen. More often than not it intensifies their interest if they sort of asked for it....meaning you werent chasing her and didnt care if you showed up or not.

But thats what I would do, but understand I would do that with the attitude of "I dont care if I hear back from her or not". And I truly wouldnt care.

Any woman with high interest will reach out to you. Thats a fact.

Dont reach out to her and you are going to either get one of two texts the day of or the day before the date:
"Sorry but I am not going to make it"
"Hey...havent heard from you....still good for tomorrow night?"

So sit back and see what she does. Remain still and calm. You hit the ball over the net, if she doesnt hit it back over, go find someone else to play with.

My bad dude, I should of been more specific. I meant regarding the "text me when you get home after hooking up" text.

 

[Dash Riprock]

I just say "Hey shoot me a quick text to let me make it home ok since we've been drinking". Very nonchalant.

I do this too especially with ONS girls. In the age of #metoo (yes, it's still around), women's liberation and empowerment, and perhaps regret about what transpired the night before, it's in a man's best interests to show her (or at the very least give her the impression) that she wasn't a f*uck toy or a McDonald's bag you crumpled up and threw away after the liaison. Show her you "care" a bit and it will greatly minimize any potential negative fallout. Super simple, easy, and SMART.

 

[zinc4]

I do this too especially with ONS girls. In the age of #metoo (yes, it's still around), women's liberation and empowerment, and perhaps regret about what transpired the night before, it's in a man's best interests to show her (or at the very least give her the impression) that she wasn't a f*uck toy or a McDonald's bag you crumpled up and threw away after the liaison. Show her you "care" a bit and it will greatly minimize any potential negative fallout. Super simple, easy, and SMART.

Agreed. I have been falsely accused of rape by ghosting 2 girls on two separate occasions. So now i act polite then just slowly ghost if i dont like.

 

[Dash Riprock]

Agreed. I have been falsely accused of rape by ghosting 2 girls on two separate occasions. So now i act polite then just slowly ghost if i dont like.

Whoa, that sucks man. Out of curiosity was it just a threat or did they (and you) lawyer up?

 

[Dash Riprock]

Something similar happened to me and is what brought me here in the first place. It was an absolute betrayal of trust.

Blows my mind seeing how common this is. Frightening really.

The biggest piece of BS is that the man's name is always shown as public, whether he's guilty or not, and the woman can remain anonymous because of potential "ramifications." What about ramifications for the man in terms of his employment prospects, public humiliation, and now this will come up every time someone Google's him? I live in a college town and read a few times a year about some 20-something kid who is "accused" (not convicted) of rape or sexual assault and there's his picture plastered on the home page with his full name clearly mentioned in the article. It's unbelievably unfair and one-sided. It can happen to anyone, too.

I wonder what a lawyer would say if some guy tried to sue a woman after a ONS because she was unresponsive to his calls and he had regrets and wanted to press rape charges against HER. "Yeah, Mr. Lawyer, we went out then went back to her place where she got me drunk and had sex with me. I don't remember much. And now she won't return my calls. I feel so, so...dirty. I want to press charges against her." Would love to hear an audio of that call.

 

[darksprezzatura]

It's easy to go down the rabbit hole of self improvement to avoid approaching women.

It's an advantage to cultivate a life you love.


But it does not replace the actual action of approaching women you are attracted to you.

In my experience, being a regular guy, dimes don't flock to me 24/7.

If I need to go for someone I like, self improvement is a huge advantage but not a be all end all.

Women don't automatically get attracted and bend over everytime I lock eyes with one.

Having had a lot of experience since my high school days, I can firmly say this:

If you're struggling as a teenager or a newbie to the game, or having troubles getting women, cultivate a life and bring a woman you like in to it, and let the chips fall as they may.

Volume. Numbers. Probability. Action.

This is what gets me laid, sometimes with two girls a day.

 

[zinc4]

Whoa, that sucks man. Out of curiosity was it just a threat or did they (and you) lawyer up?

First time was a threat to call police and get all her guy friends after me.

Second one same thing with police only she told all my friends and family and made up a story about me beating her as well. Never touched this girl and def never raped her.


Thankfully everyone knew she was nuts. I made the crucial mistake of adding this looney toon to my facebook and forgot to delete her. I never give girls my socials now.

 

[The Diver]

I just say, "Hey, shoot me a quick text to let me make it home ok since we've been drinking".

I am interested to know, what would you do if she fell asleep and won't text you when she gets home?

 

[mrgoodstuff]

First time was a threat to call police and get all her guy friends after me.

Second one same thing with police only she told all my friends and family and made up a story about me beating her as well. Never touched this girl and def never raped her.


Thankfully everyone knew she was nuts. I made the crucial mistake of adding this looney toon to my facebook and forgot to delete her. I never give girls my socials now.

The first time was enough

 

[zinc4]

The first time was enough

Both were feminized white women in the US. I started avoiding white women like the plague after that unless they are eastern European