Well I'm not going to crow about it or pass judgment. I think that's the problem is that men make judgments on girls based on how men value sex. It's not always as simple as madonna/wh0re but clearly a lot of guys will put a virgin into Column A and a bar skank into Column B and that will pacify them.
That's another way of saying I don't think your ex was any more manipulative than a man will let himself be manipulated...aside from any red flags or toxic behavior, etc. Of course women will omit and obfuscate. The other side of the coin is that men, even RP men, will pedestalize virginity and shame what they see as promiscuity. This is another way that men lead, unknowingly sometimes, and women follow ("I don't want him to think I'm easy" vs. "he's down with slvtty behavior").
Plus, women will assume certain archetypes regardless of their history. The "innocent girl," the "experienced girl," everything in between. They're all responding to the same prompts. Anyone who's gotten a sweet girl in bed knows that sweetness often ends when the clothes come off.
As a minor aside, personally I don't consider a girl who's had a d!ck in her mouth to be a virgin. To me, any kind of willful sexual experience is the crossing of the Rubicon. (Otherwise lifelong lesbians would be virgins.)