Benefits of commitment

BadBoy89

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A lot of men can get sex nowadays with little effort. It’s the commitment men want from women between the ages of 18- 29 that this site exists. This commitment is ridiculously hard to get, especially in 2021. Yet, can we name what the benefits of committing to ONE women forever?

Remember:


Women are not dependent on men
Society always back the women‘s side
Court always backs the women’s side
Women are encouraged to have sexual options
Women use emotion to manipulate
Women only care about a man’s use
Women lose their fertility and attractiveness over time

What does commiting to ONE women in 2021 get a man?
 

mrgoodstuff

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A lot of men can get sex nowadays with little effort. It’s the commitment men want from women between the ages of 18- 29 that this site exists. This commitment is ridiculously hard to get, especially in 2021. Yet, can we name what the benefits of committing to ONE women forever?

Remember:


Women are not dependent on men
Society always back the women‘s side
Court always backs the women’s side
Women are encouraged to have sexual options
Women use emotion to manipulate
Women only care about a man’s use
Women lose their fertility and attractiveness over time

What does commiting to ONE women in 2021 get a man?
Savvy female "Daters" expect a man to have other women.
 

TheProspect

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What does committing to ONE women in 2021 get a man?
For me, as someone who wants to be a father one day, the reason why I would commit to one woman in 2021 is because I want the long-term companionship of a woman who has the qualities I seek in a lover, in a partner, and in the mother of my future children.

@BeExcellent did a great job laying out the lover, partner, and mother priority list here. I recommend the LTR-minded men on this forum to give it a read.

The benefits of finding such a woman should be obvious. Now whether finding such a woman capable of consistently demonstrating all of these qualities is even possible to begin with, well that's another question entirely.
 

derby1

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For me, as someone who wants to be a father one day,
make sure you earn over 80k and can give a certain lifestyle.

any less and she will bail on you, and go on the welfare, before the kid is 6.
 

RangerMIke

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For me, as someone who wants to be a father one day, the reason why I would commit to one woman in 2021 is because I want the long-term companionship of a woman who has the qualities I seek in a lover, in a partner, and in the mother of my future children.

@BeExcellent did a great job laying out the lover, partner, and mother priority list here. I recommend the LTR-minded men on this forum to give it a read.

The benefits of finding such a woman should be obvious. Now whether finding such a woman capable of consistently demonstrating all of these qualities is even possible to begin with, well that's another question entirely.
I agree with @BeExcellent assessment in this post. Especially the sexual chemistry from the very beginning. Women understand this a lot better than men do. If you do not have that animalistic sexual chemistry right in the very beginning there is little chance that anything is going to work long term.

If you've ever been with a woman that broke things off with you right after you started sleeping with her... this is why. She just wasn't feeling it. It really isn't you (well maybe some of it was but it's not really anything you can help). You might be checking all the boxes, but if you don't have this going in... then really the woman is wasting her time. Sexual compatibility is the single most important thing in a committed relationship.

If you have ever looked at a couple and wondered "What the fvck she sees in him?" It's very likely sexual compatibility.
 

Larry Lurex

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Yet, can we name what the benefits of committing to ONE women forever?
An oft overlooked measure of a man are that which he is willing to sacrifice, in order to have any semblance of meaning to his life.

I’m not ready to settle down, but I’m also tired of empty, meaningless sex.

If by some sheer serendipity that I fall in love and commit the cardinal sin of oneitis, I really don’t care if you see me as an idiot.
 

Dash Riprock

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Many men, especially over 35-40, are insecure and afraid of being alone -- period. That is your #1 reason.

I know some of these guys. Nice guys, but clueless about women. As beta as you can get. They get ass-raped in court and immediately jump back into the dating pool looking to get married again asap. One friend of mine is a high ranking executive with IBM. Been married 4-5 times. Kids from all marriages. Nice guy, really smart, appears to have a leadership mindset, but stupid af with women -- and openly admits it.

There is simply no need to get married in 2021. Even if you wants kids, you may be able to negotiate around it though 95% of all women WILL want marriage before planning on having kids. So then it becomes a big role of the dice in the game called You Bet Your Life. Not for me.
 

RickTheToad

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A lot of men can get sex nowadays with little effort. It’s the commitment men want from women between the ages of 18- 29 that this site exists. This commitment is ridiculously hard to get, especially in 2021. Yet, can we name what the benefits of committing to ONE women forever?

Remember:


Women are not dependent on men
Society always back the women‘s side
Court always backs the women’s side
Women are encouraged to have sexual options
Women use emotion to manipulate
Women only care about a man’s use
Women lose their fertility and attractiveness over time

What does commiting to ONE women in 2021 get a man?
Nothing is 100% dude. Either can still cheat or be unfaithful in other ways.
 

oldmanofthesea

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If I'm really attracted to a girl I'm dating, I don't find myself craving other women. I do still look at other women, and I am still attracted to them, but it's not difficult for me to not act on it. I enjoy sex better with a girl I respect/admire and am attracted to and familiar with more than a stranger, and this for me is the single biggest reason I enter LTRs and am open to them. I am very picky and specific in what I look for in women physically, but I can still find women to sleep with. What's much harder for me is to find women I really respect and admire. Basic women bore and annoy me. When I find a girl I am 100% physically attracted to, but also really admire for who they are, what they can do, and their confidence, my attraction increases and it makes sex and everything else a lot better. I find that I'm attracted to women who excel in something - for example, some of the women I've dated recently have been elite-level runners who nearly always podium and I also dated a professional ballerina who got a lot of big parts in productions.

So that's the benefit of commitment in my eyes. All that said, I have never wanted kids and I don't want to marry because I'm not religious and I see no benefit to me - only drawbacks. I have also been around long enough to be jaded about commitment and marriage. I know that many women think marriage is going to bring them happiness and cure their internal fears and anxieties, and when they marry and find that marriage didn't fix their internal problems, they get angry and bitter and either cheat or divorce and then walk away with half the guy's stuff. Also, a guy I know recently had an ex of his who is now engaged to be married to another guy reach out to him just to hook up, and they did.

I'm still open to commitment with the right women but I spend no time craving it or thinking about it or setting it as a goal for myself. Instead my goal is to be happy with myself and have a fun, exciting life filled with friends and adventures and I've been successful with that. Women and relationships are great but I don't put hardly any focus on it any more and when I have dry spells, I'm completely fine with it.
 

SW15

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A lot of men can get sex nowadays with little effort.
I disagree with this premise since male sexlessness has increased in the past 10-20 years. The top 10% of men are getting more sex but the middle of the bell curve guy is having problems getting sex.

It’s the commitment men want from women between the ages of 18- 29 that this site exists. This commitment is ridiculously hard to get, especially in 2021. Yet, can we name what the benefits of committing to ONE women forever?

Remember:


Women are not dependent on men
Society always back the women‘s side
Court always backs the women’s side
Women are encouraged to have sexual options
Women use emotion to manipulate
Women only care about a man’s use
Women lose their fertility and attractiveness over time

What does commiting to ONE women in 2021 get a man?
Getting a long term commitment is difficult. A lot of women demonstrate bad behavior that would disqualify them from a long term relationship, especially a marriage where the consequences if it fails are high. It is possible to live a serial monogamous lifestyle where there are a series of 1-5 year long relationships without marriage or kids. A 1-5 year long relationship is a lesser form of commitment.

Even if you get a commitment from a woman in her 20s, there's a decent chance it fails before she turns 35 or 40. If you have children with a woman now, it is more likely than not that you won't be in a romantic relationship with her by the time the first kid turns 18.
 

Dash Riprock

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Ben Zobrist who plays for the Chicago Cubs just filed for divorce from his wife citing:

Ben Zobrist’s filing contends that his wife “has been guilty of inappropriate marital conduct which render further cohabitation impossible,” though the article didn’t elaborate.

Gee, smells like cheating to me. So she marries Zobrist, cheats, files for divorce. Maybe Zobrist was a raging abusive alcoholic, but let's assume he's not as it would be hard to play at his level as a Pro MLB player for 162 games and 6 months for a solid team if he was.

Zobrist made $78M throughout his MLB career. Gee, I wonder if that had anything to do with her filing for divorce??? Cashing out, perhaps?
 

Plinco

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make sure you earn over 80k and can give a certain lifestyle.

any less and she will bail on you, and go on the welfare, before the kid is 6.
I think that depend on the where you live and the cost of living.
 

corrector

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I disagree with this premise since male sexlessness has increased in the past 10-20 years. The top 10% of men are getting more sex but the middle of the bell curve guy is having problems getting sex.
I think that you are going to get vastly different experiences if you are coming from a sub-5, normie-range, or chad-lite/chad. I would not disagree with him, but assume he is genetically gifted so he probably a different experience then normie guys. So a thread like this sounds like its meant for chadlites/chads, not normies or sub-5 guys. This is the reality for chads/chadlites, but not for either of us, and most other guys. There are three different universes.
 

2Rocky

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A lot of men can get sex nowadays with little effort. It’s the commitment men want from women between the ages of 18- 29 that this site exists. This commitment is ridiculously hard to get, especially in 2021. Yet, can we name what the benefits of committing to ONE women forever?

What does commiting to ONE women in 2021 get a man?
Looking back I got married in college to someone I thought I would GROW with. I can tell you we grew in different ways and she didn't grow at the same rate-or in the same direction-as I did. Made it 20 years, with 10 good ones. SO I would say don't bet on POTENTIAL.

I had an LDR for 3 years after my divorce that has become 2 more years of cohabitation. So I had my plate spinning and I do and don't miss the "hunting" that occurred after my divorce. One thing is for sure. My pursuit of discomfortable activities like endurance activities such as ultrarunning and backpacking etc. has waned as I became more happy with my relationship.

I'm not sure if I pursued those Individual accomplishments as a way to reset my misery meter to cope with my marriage being unfulfilling. I had those activities to escape from feeling "not good enough" in my marriage. When I exited that, I had my opportunity to be totally self centered. And I was for a while. But there is something about being part of a team, the captain of a team, that is fulfilling in it's own unique way.

Today I revel in watching my woman have a relationship with my youngest daughter and show her how to be loving and appreciative in a manner her mother never did.

Read BE's well written 3 posts referenced above. I think it is the first marriage advice that has given the Lover component the priority it deserves. When that is present, you don't feel like you need to hunt for strange. The DEPTH of the relationship is unfathomable until you feel like it is something that was missing from your life.
 

HaleyBaron

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I can't like this enough. Cooking takes a lot of ****ing time, and it has slowly started making me wonder if I want to settle with a gf or not. I'm hungry af due to weightlifting, but I really dont want to spend my time doing cooking when I have other stuff to do.
 

SW15

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I would have agreed many years ago. Now, not so much. I cook most of my meals. I'm a solid cook. I've cooked for girlfriends.

The primary benefit of a romantic relationship is sex. Regular sex without having to put in too much effort apporaching. When I examine my 20+ years in the mating environment (late 30s guy), I have put up a solid notch count and have had some good relationships but I've dealt with a lot of shiit. Commitment does not equal marriage. It's possible to have an exclusive, committed relationship without putting a ring on it. If you believe all relationships are transient (a valid perception), then there's not much of a point to marriage but there is a point to extended relationships.
 

corrector

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Regular sex without having to put in too much effort apporaching.
The OP/Chads/Chadlites probably don't put too much of an effort doing anything. They just have to show up. So that would probably be easy for them.
 

BadBoy89

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The primary benefit of a romantic relationship is sex. Regular sex without having to put in too much effort apporaching.
This is one of the reasons I can think of. ‘Fitting in” and “not being alone” are others.
 

mrgoodstuff

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The OP/Chads/Chadlites probably don't put too much of an effort doing anything. They just have to show up. So that would probably be easy for them.
In the situation the Chad/Chadlite/Tyrones are the "hot chick" . The females want to nail them, many of them do. Those guys are much more discriminant in who they will put up with and turn down a lot of sex. Females stalk and bug these guys. They double text them. They try to do acts of service to show their interest, etc.
 
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