How should I go about getting my Chinese friend in bed?

ErasedId

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She hasn't been around for quite some time now, several months, because she was visiting her family in China, but recently wrote me that she'd be coming back soon. I'd like to use this opportunity to check if I could maybe get her into bed. I probably should've tried to do so earlier but didn't, because of a few reasons. Mostly I was just worried I wouldn't succeed, I guess.

I think I might've had chances with her though. For instance she had a boyfriend (don't know if they're still a couple, since she never mentions him) but clearly didn't want me to know about him and also she once gave me some sweets with hearts on it as a present (maybe to check if I liked her?).

I don't really think her behavior is that great, but it's not like I have to marry her, right? I'd at least like to sleep with her, because I think she's pretty cute (she's maybe 4'10" and very petite), but I don't really see us getting into a LTR.

So what should my plan of action be then when I soon see her again?
 

ErasedId

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like should I invite her on a date? (what are some good options? most stuff here is closed, but you can get coffee or ice cream)

and where do I go from there then?
 

deadmasterx

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It's usually harder to escalate things when you start as friends. Since you probably didn't show interest (sexual one) in her since the beginning, it's better to start acting more as a date than as friend.

First step is surely removing your "friend attention".
By that I mean that if you spend too much time talking with her, go after her asking for advices, listen to her sexual life with other guys or stuff like this, stop as soon as possible. From now on, the communication is gonna be a bit more simpler. Forget your phone (for most time), use it more to set up dates. Unless the conversation is going extremely interesting in there, avoid having small talk on your phone with her.

Second step, which is the obvious thing to do, ask her out on a date
Here goes a few tips. The first one is that you won't ever ask her out in the afternoon or morning. All your dates with her must be happening at night. What's the best time? I usually like going out at 7 or 8pm, because I like going to multiple places at once. By the way, that's another great tip. You can start by having a walk somewhere nice, somewhere you can talk. Then, if things are going well and if you're the drinking kind, go to a bar or pub (remember that asians have low tolerance for alcohol, so don't push her). If things are going good enough, you should probably be making out with her right in there, or at least touching more intimately. That's a good sign. Keep on talking, touching, flirting, back off a little bit, always two steps forward, one back. When you feel ready, tell her "Let's go to my place". That's another important thing, don't ask her, invite her in a leader way.

If she rejects you, don't worry. Keep up with the kissing, touching, as if nothing happened. Remember that it's not by making out with her more (or harder) that she'll change her mind. Keep on teasing, always. Women love being teased, love feeling that she's not on control (on sexual matters), nothing turns her on more than that. If she doesn't bring up the idea of going to your house (or going to hers), you won't be doing it again either.

Third step, which may be the hardest one for most guys, is to let her come to you
If you had a good first date with her, you will feel extremely excited. If you didn't have such a good one, you'll either feel down or fall for the "illusion of action". Don't worry. Let her reach you out, let her orbit you for a while. Think that whenever she comes to talk with you it's because she wants to see you, so your job is making it happen by setting up another date with her.

The things that I described you on the second step can be happening in the first date, but this is a RARE case. It will most likely happen in the second or third one. I know you're crazy to **** her, but always remember that when women feel like you're trying to get sex from her, she won't feel like giving it to you. Keep your cool, go there to have a good time and things will happen naturally. Be bold, don't be afraid to touch her, always keeping eye contact. Touch her when you speak, specially her forearm, hands, escalate on that too.

Eventually, if there's a spark, sex will happen. If she just see you as friend, it probably won't. Yes, you can try to change her perception, but it fail most times. Just be patient and let things happen, always being your best self.

Good luck with her.
 

ErasedId

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Has she shown you she is sexually interested in you?
I asked some of my Chinese friends and they said a Chinese girl probably wouldn't give you a present like that if she wasn't interested in you. And since she also didn't want me to know about her boyfriend I feel like she might've liked me.

I'm pretty fit / muscular, I think she likes that, she also asked me about my training and stuff.
 

ThisIsSparta

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I guess taking her out on a date at night is out of the question in DDR 2.0-Germany these days and most places will be shut down anyway.

The girl knows you and whether she would bang you or not, is already made up in her mind. No reason in dancing around it for another number of dates. First thing to do is getting rid of the "just a friend"-vibes. You need to get into a position where you can escalate step by step.

Invite her to your place when she is back from China to hang out/"celebrate her being back", cooking, dvds, bottle of wine.... whatever.
Dont sit with her in your place, chatting 3 hours with her like a woman.
No need to immediately press for sex on the "first" date but create opportunities to be physically close to her and escalate to kissing/making out. Go further if she is up to it, but dont push it.

Whatever you do, it has to be CLEAR that you have sexual interest in her after the date.
Dont talk about it, show her.
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

SirBigBell

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When she emerges from her Covid quarantine and is certified clear, you then either have to take the full risk and jump in feet first or do nothing at all.

Changing gears from friendship to romance is always a risky attempt, because you may have misread her potential interest. By you putting your cards on the table and showing your hand, you automatically put your friendship on the line too. If she rejects you then consider your friendship down the toilet.
If your friendship is too valuable to risk then i suggest you go and hunt somewhere else. If you think their is mileage in the attempt, then feel free to go ahead and decisively throw your hat in the ring
 

bat soup

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She hasn't been around for quite some time now, several months, because she was visiting her family in China, but recently wrote me that she'd be coming back soon. I'd like to use this opportunity to check if I could maybe get her into bed. I probably should've tried to do so earlier but didn't, because of a few reasons. Mostly I was just worried I wouldn't succeed, I guess.

I think I might've had chances with her though. For instance she had a boyfriend (don't know if they're still a couple, since she never mentions him) but clearly didn't want me to know about him and also she once gave me some sweets with hearts on it as a present (maybe to check if I liked her?).

I don't really think her behavior is that great, but it's not like I have to marry her, right? I'd at least like to sleep with her, because I think she's pretty cute (she's maybe 4'10" and very petite), but I don't really see us getting into a LTR.

So what should my plan of action be then when I soon see her again?
Get her alone and make a move. That's the only way to find out.
 

RangerMIke

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@deadmasterx is correct. I could not have said it any better.

Understand you don't have any control over this. You can not make her do something she does not want to do. You get to sleep with her, ONLY if she wants to sleep with you.

Key here is: (1) She has to know, without you coming out and saying it, that you want to fvck her. (2) You do not do this by hanging around without taking any action. (3) If she won't meet you on a date... move the fvck on and forget about her.

Everything you do has to be attempting to get her out on dates... if she won't.... well you don't have a shot.
 

characternote

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I love these types of threads as the replies inevitably demonstrate why the 'seduction' community is kind of a facade and why it as been slowly dieing out.

The guy asking is probably thinking ''I'll learn some things to say to her to make her want me. I'll learn things from these guys on a seduction forum to give me an 'edge' over my friend who has never heard of 'game'. He'll just tell her she's hot or just start making a mover on her or whatever. Not me! I'm gonna get actual seduction advice from PUA's''

Then he gets told:

Has she shown you she is sexually interested in you?
Understand you don't have any control over this. You can not make her do something she does not want to do. You get to sleep with her, ONLY if she wants to sleep with you.
The girl knows you and whether she would bang you or not, is already made up in her mind
Exactly what his friend would do.

Now, the advice is correct. I'm not having a go at the replies. It's the truth. But it always makes me laugh to see such advice on PUA forums as I try to imagine the confused reaction of the person asking who probably thought he was gonna learn some sort of 'seduction' magic lol

I see the same thing on 'seddit': People ask 'there's this really cute girl I met at work. I don't think she's into me. So how do I 'seduce' her and make her wanna bang me? What do I say to her to make her attracted??' and the replies are like 'Show your intent and ask her out'/'tell her she's cute'

I also often wonder what the replies would look like on such forums if this was asked 10-15 years ago.
 

Lookatu

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Have a backup in case you get rejected...

 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

ThisIsSparta

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I love these types of threads as the replies inevitably demonstrate why the 'seduction' community is kind of a facade and why it as been slowly dieing out.

The guy asking is probably thinking ''I'll learn some things to say to her to make her want me. I'll learn things from these guys on a seduction forum to give me an 'edge' over my friend who has never heard of 'game'. He'll just tell her she's hot or just start making a mover on her or whatever. Not me! I'm gonna get actual seduction advice from PUA's''

Then he gets told:





Exactly what his friend would do.

Now, the advice is correct. I'm not having a go at the replies. It's the truth. But it always makes me laugh to see such advice on PUA forums as I try to imagine the confused reaction of the person asking who probably thought he was gonna learn some sort of 'seduction' magic lol

I see the same thing on 'seddit': People ask 'there's this really cute girl I met at work. I don't think she's into me. So how do I 'seduce' her and make her wanna bang me? What do I say to her to make her attracted??' and the replies are like 'Show your intent and ask her out'/'tell her she's cute'

I also often wonder what the replies would look like on such forums if this was asked 10-15 years ago.
You will find here 3 kinds of people:

*the redpilled
*the PUA
*the clueless victims of modern women

If you read some of the threads, sometimes there are outright trench-fights between pua´s and the redpilled about what to do about women, with the victims being disappointed that they didnt get an easy step by step manual how to get any woman to hop on their dyck.

Being late to the show (joined last year), my guess is, there are more redpilled guys here today then back in the day and they often have a different approach to the procurement of pvssy then the PUA.
 

characternote

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You will find here 3 kinds of people:

*the redpilled
*the PUA
*the clueless victims of modern women

If you read some of the threads, sometimes there are outright trench-fights between pua´s and the redpilled about what to do about women, with the victims being disappointed that they didnt get an easy step by step manual how to get any woman to hop on their dyck.

Being late to the show (joined last year), my guess is, there are more redpilled guys here today then back in the day and they often have a different approach to the procurement of pvssy then the PUA.
yeah, I get it.
I used to be very much PUA, and over time with experience, I shifted more towards 'redpill' (I guess) - by that i'm mainly talking about pickup in terms of all you can do is shoot your shot and all the lines and negs and tips and tricks are honestly pretty much irrelevant. (I don't really care about 95% of 'redpill' sh1t and find lots of them to just be fake wannabe manly men or just whiners)

the advice i'd have given 5 years ago is different to what i'd give now.
Nowadays my advice to the OP would be the same as yours and the other posters I quoted lol
 
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ErasedId

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The guy asking is probably thinking ''I'll learn some things to say to her to make her want me. I'll learn things from these guys on a seduction forum to give me an 'edge' over my friend who has never heard of 'game'. He'll just tell her she's hot or just start making a mover on her or whatever. Not me! I'm gonna get actual seduction advice from PUA's''
Eh, the advice is fine and I appreciate it. I know I need to make a move, I'm just a bit passive / shy so I have difficulty with this.

Have a backup in case you get rejected...
Those don't look like her at all though. She doesn't have big boobs, she's very flat, and she has short hair. Looks a bit like a boy
 

Do not be too easy. If you are too easy to get, she will not want you. If you are too easy to keep, she will lose interest in you. If you are too easy to control, she will not respect you.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

ErasedId

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Is this a troll post?

I’m not helping you get this ugly Asian chick into bed with you.

Sh!t, next time y’all walk into your place together, bend her over the couch and have your way with her for a quick 10 minutes.
Not a troll post. And she's not ugly just because she's apparently not your type. People have different preferences.
 

characternote

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I’m not helping you get this ugly Asian chick into bed with you.
well you couldn't if you wanted too lol. None of us could. That's kind of the point.
She is either attracted to him, or she isn't.
He just needs to find out (as per the previous advice he's been given in this thread)
 

2Rocky

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Just tell her




我想对你做热情的爱。
Wǒ xiǎng duì nǐ zuò rèqíng de ài.
 
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