If she asked you to hang out and then cancels...?

[Datinglife26]

If a girl asked you to hang out for a 3rd date and then cancelled the day before your date what would your response be? She says sorry she can't make it.

Keep in mind on your 2nd date she (legitimately) had to leave after she asked you to spend the night together, so sex has to wait, you made out and both got handsy in as she waited for her ride to arrive and she was sucking your lips off your face until the last second when she had to go .

She then texts you when she gets home saying she had a great time tonight, you respond and say the same back to her and that she should call you if she wants to do it again soon.

2 days go by and she shoots you a text saying "Heeey there! Are you free to hang out this weekend coming?"
You set up a definite date with a definite time and you ask her if this works, she agrees and says "sounds perfect see you then"

Then she hits you with the cancelled message above the evening before your 3rd date.

What do you do?


-Now before anyone questions the reason she had to leave on the second date, it was 100% legit.
-OP is not new to dating but situations like this seem to be that grey area I need to work on
- I am here for solid dating advise, not smash and dash, I have plates I can go to if I am only interested in sex


Any good discussion on this will help others, been a Corey Wayne follower for years (6yrs) and have gone from zero to hero so much so my friends can't figure out how I get so much ass. Having said that, I am human and I do struggle in these spots where a girl goes from asking me to cancelling all while I have done nothing but set the date up?


Thanks

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Idk man, you don't want to be used by women, but expecting a woman to make a man her main priority is a pipe dream especially if you haven't been dating her for more than a year.

 

[Datinglife26]

Was the first time she cancelled on you?

Did she offer to reschedule?

First time she cancelled, 1st date no issue, 2nd date no issue and she was all over me.
only difference is that the 3rd date was an hour away in my home town and she would have to drive to my house when technically we aren't supposed to with these covid19 laws in our country. But she said before she thinks they are stupid rules.

While we set up the date she said;

Her - "well if I am going to have a drink at your house I will need to stay...if you are okay with that? I can take your bed you can have the couch "

Me- "lol my bed is pretty big...but if you are worried about constantly ending up on myside of the bed I can put a few pillows between us.."

Her- "I think you will need more than a few pillow " (she tried to **** test, I made it about her not trusting herself around me)

This is as we are just finishing the details of the date time place etc, keeping it light and a little flirty. She agreed after that and it was set.

She did not offer to reschedule when she cancelled. I said "hey, no problem" and then that was it.
This was about 2 weeks ago now.


Edit: your signature quote is one of my favourites, reminds me of coach carter lol

 

[Datinglife26]

When they cancel with no counteroffer, I almost always ghost them.

Often I'll block and delete their # too.

Yeah I am used to doing that too, but lately I feel like that is more about me being butthurt than being indifferent.
Obviously I am making a thread so I did/do like this girl, but sometime I feel I am too quick to throw my toys out of the pram and burn bridges when if I did nothing it leaves the option that they could come back at some point and then I just have to set up a date and get an easy lay.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Women aren’t logical. I don’t know what else you want us to say. The only thing that matters is she broke the date. Delete her number and move on.

My speculation is she found a better option that doesn’t require an hour drive.

 

[Lookatu]

She did not offer to reschedule when she cancelled.

She found a better option if she doesn't offer to reschedule.

She probably love bombed several dudes and you along with all the other guys thought you were somehow special or had a chance because of the things she said and because you guys made out

Kissing/making out these days is just like a handshake for these girls. Remember that.

Also a certain segment of girls know that it is expected that sex will happen on the 3rd date so if they aren't feeling it, they will cancel the 3rd date to avoid that.

Actions over words as well. Never place ANY weight on what a girl tells you.

NEXT...

 

[Datinglife26]

I challenge you to walk away from her and MEAN it. No more texts, phone calls, emails...NOTHING.

Far more rewarding for the aspiring DJ to walk away and risk losing them.

Walking away feeling butthurt is OK. You WANT to be somewhat jaded and cynical.

Well I want to be indifferent. Thats my biggest goal in life. Hard so ill keep working on it. Having no attachment is being able to sleep and night.

Being jaded and butthurt is just using my energy. I can next girls no problem, I guess thats why I am questioning if its always the right way to go. Having that ability isn't even a challenge anymore. I was able to do it when I broke up with my ex while I was in love with her because she was being disrespectful and rude too often. So I know I have that in me lol even when I am heart broken and not thinking clearly like a wussy. That walk away ability stays strong (thank ****).

I will walk away from this, because its the right thing to do. So I agree with you, and its my first reaction tbh. Even if we react the same conclusion from different points of view.

Thanks for your comment, its good to hear the blunt opinion from someone else.

 

[Lookatu]

I can next girls no problem, I guess thats why I am questioning if its always the right way to go.

It is in this day and age I'm afraid...
Abundance mindset or you'll always lose...

 

[Datinglife26]

She found a better option if she doesn't offer to reschedule.

She probably love bombed several dudes and you along with all the other guys thought you were somehow special or had a chance because of the things she said and because you guys made out

Kissing/making out these days is just like a handshake for these girls. Remember that.

Also a certain segment of girls know that it is expected that sex will happen on the 3rd date so if they aren't feeling it, they will cancel the 3rd date to avoid that.

Actions over words as well. Never place ANY weight on what a girl tells you.

NEXT...

I never thought I was special, I know I am definitely in the top 20% of the 80-20% rule though. Like I said I am not new to dating.
The only thing that would throw me is that this girl is the one who invited herself to stay over.

But yeah, look at her actions. Like you said.

 

[Datinglife26]

It is in this day and age I'm afraid...
Abundance mindset or you'll always lose...

Abunance is plenty so I its not even a mindset issue. Have a south American girl who wants to cook me dinner and **** lol I guess I'll just go cry into some fake titties

 

[Lookatu]

Abunance is plenty so I its not even a mindset issue. Have a south American girl who wants to cook me dinner and **** lol I guess I'll just go cry into some fake titties

Damn man, I feel for you. I know a lot of guys that would trade to be in your position. LOL

Even with abundance and quantity, you're going to get to a point where you just want quality only eventually. You may reach a point where you value your time more and more and will find yourself foregoing most girls unless she's of the highest caliber(not just in looks but overall package).

That is when you truly have aimed for something with meaning in life. Until then, enjoy...

 

[Datinglife26]

Damn man, I feel for you. I know a lot of guys that would trade to be in your position. LOL

Even with abundance and quantity, you're going to get to a point where you just want quality only eventually. You may reach a point where you value your time more and more and will find yourself foregoing most girls unless she's of the highest caliber(not just in looks but overall package).

That is when you truly have aimed for something with meaning in life. Until then, enjoy...

Thanks man haha

Yeah I guess I have been holding out for something better. So after the first 2 dates with girl went so smooth and she was then asking me for the 3rd date I was looking forward to seeing if it would continue.

I am not gonna get bitter like some dudes. Think I'm realising that I did nothing wrong with this girl. If she suddenly backs off that's on her. I was doing all that 3% **** and nothing different to how I set up the first two dates. I'm not a mind reader either so I'll leave her be.

Anyway if she wants to walk away fine. Sucks but she is her own person so whatever plenty more fish. She'll be back no doubt they always come back in some form or another.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Thanks man haha

Yeah I guess I have been holding out for something better. So after the first 2 dates with girl went so smooth and she was then asking me for the 3rd date I was looking forward to seeing if it would continue.

I am not gonna get bitter like some dudes. Think I'm realising that I did nothing wrong with this girl. If she suddenly backs off that's on her. I was doing all that 3% **** and nothing different to how I set up the first two dates. I'm not a mind reader either so I'll leave her be.

Anyway if she wants to walk away fine. Sucks but she is her own person so whatever plenty more fish. She'll be back no doubt they always come back in some form or another.

To some guys on here, If a girl ain't texting you every morning begging you to suck your dvck then she has low interest lol.

 

[Datinglife26]

To some guys on here, If a girl ain't texting you every morning begging you to suck your dvck then she has low interest lol.

Lol women also get periods. Like we are top logical. They are like cats you just have to let then wander off until they come home purring on your lap.

I've had girls go from not interested to naked by doing nothing but waiting.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Lol women also get periods. Like we are top logical. They are like cats you just have to let then wander off until they come home purring on your lap.

I've had girls go from not interested to naked by doing nothing but waiting.

They got so many options that it is unrealistic to expect consistent high interest within the first year of dating tbh.

 

[Glassguy]

Just some advice-

only difference is that the 3rd date was an hour away in my home town and she would have to drive to my house

When it was time for her to invest, she bailed. I bet you drove TO HER the first 2 dates. Free meals.

She did not offer to reschedule when she cancelled. I said "hey, no problem" and then that was it.
This was about 2 weeks ago now.

So its been 2 weeks and you havent heard from her? She gone.

She'll be back no doubt they always come back in some form or another.

Not always

She realized 2 things and bailed on you-
1.) She was gonna have to invest driving to see you this time
2.) She was gonna have to put out

She didnt want to, so she canceled.

Not sure why after 2 weeks of silence from her you would want to see her again. At BEST case scenario she would reach out, I would have her drive all the way to me and then not show up for the date. When she texted asking where I was after she drove to my area I would just say "Oh sorry. Something came up. Cant make it" and then not respond anymore.

Be part of the movement that shows these entitled chicks they really arent worth what they think they are.....

 

[manfrombelow]

Kissing/making out these days is just like a handshake for these girls. Remember that

This is gold.

 

[PRW63]

Yeah I am used to doing that too, but lately I feel like that is more about me being butthurt than being indifferent.

I agree. I have never blocked anyone and I have never deleted anyone from the phone contacts unless the information was invalid no longer needed (not every entry is a former date). The only reason for me to do that is if they actively harass me in some way and cause problems. Otherwise leaving it open and maintaining the contact data lets me know who it is that tried to reach me because it will show who they are. From that point I am a big boy and can decide if I want to respond back to them or not.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

At the end of the day it all boils down to you are far more interested in her at THIS point in time than she is in you.

That may change or it may not.

 

[Datinglife26]

Just some advice-


When it was time for her to invest, she bailed. I bet you drove TO HER the first 2 dates. Free meals.


So its been 2 weeks and you havent heard from her? She gone.


Not always

She realized 2 things and bailed on you-
1.) She was gonna have to invest driving to see you this time
2.) She was gonna have to put out

She didnt want to, so she canceled.

Not sure why after 2 weeks of silence from her you would want to see her again. At BEST case scenario she would reach out, I would have her drive all the way to me and then not show up for the date. When she texted asking where I was after she drove to my area I would just say "Oh sorry. Something came up. Cant make it" and then not respond anymore.

Be part of the movement that shows these entitled chicks they really arent worth what they think they are.....

You sound bitter as **** man. Jesus who hurt you.