She wants a second public date before coming to my place.

[TheNewStyle123]

What's up guys.

Went on a date yesterday to a local spot with a new girl. Date went really well - we each got one drink and she even offered to split the bill (I thanked her but paid the bill, after all it was only one drink). We then went for a walk, I initiated kino for most of the date, conversation was good, and we ended up making out a few times during the remainder of the date.

I invited her to my place this Wednesday night for dinner (and she would bring us some wine). I have not had a girl yet that I have met in person want to meet up a second time prior coming to my place, but this girl asked if we could meet up again in a public setting prior to coming to my apartment. She said it's not that she "doesn't feel comfortable", but "it's just not something I usually do on date #2, I would like to get to know you a little bit better if that's ok."

IL seemed very high on the date and still does, I am just not sure if this is a characteristic of a more quality girl vs. what I have been used to from OLD (some have come to my place either on the first date, or most have come to my place for a second date after getting a drink or coffee first).

Definitely interested in seeing her again though. HB 7.5, really sweet, great conversation, similar interests, well put together, etc. My plan is to meet up with her again in person this Wednesday for another drink. This time, if/when she offers to split the bill I will accept.

What do you guys think?

 

[Grinderman]

Yeah would perhaps have been better to invite her for a wine at a bar very close to yours......
....and then bring her back on the pretext of seeing your cactus / record collection / wine collection / open another...
she's got plausible deniability. She's going with the flow.

You gave her too much time to think about the possibility of being perceived as a slut.

 

[TheNewStyle123]

Things are going well. Have fun on date #2.

Don't sweat her wanting to have one more date before coming to your place. That's no big deal.

Thanks buddy! Yeah I honestly had a great time and felt high IL from her. I don't want to read too much into it. I think it will be fun.

 

[TheNewStyle123]

Yeah would perhaps have been better to invite her for a wine at a bar very close to yours......
....and then bring her back on the pretext of seeing your cactus / record collection / wine collection / open another...
she's got plausible deniability. She's going with the flow.

You gave her too much time to think about the possibility of being perceived as a slut.

The bar we went to yesterday is actually very close to my place - that would normally be my move but I had another plate coming over that night and wouldn't of had enough time to turn around the apartment if she came over... hahaha

 

[derby1]

"I don't do that on Date #2" means she is controlling the frame, and the journey of your relationship.

I personally believe she sees OP as LTR material, so is selling him the GF vibes.

Women are backwards. they will give the fruits to a guy who is a complete dossa, (probably not even all that).

then they punish the good guy and make him wait 3 dates

 

[TheNewStyle123]

LTR Material means "provider". That means "no sex" - she'll take the alpha seed and get "LTR Material Guy" to raise the sprog.

Think I should cancel the date?

 

[derby1]

LTR Material means "provider". That means "no sex" - she'll take the alpha seed and get "LTR Material Guy" to raise the sprog.

Black pill overload. take some time off before it you shoot a shopping mall up

 

[derby1]

Think I should cancel the date?

No,

look your gonna have to accept women have put out to certain guys on night 1.

some guys wait till night 3.

you may be better looking but now your gonna get punished!!

this is the weird stuff women do

wait like a spider and bail if you think its taking the P

 

[derby1]

There's no Black Pill in me.

you mention alpha and cucking in nearly every post.

In the Uk , its safe to say women get pregnant by normal every day guys

 

[TheNewStyle123]

No,

look your gonna have to accept women have put out to certain guys on night 1.

some guys wait till night 3.

you may be better looking but now your gonna get punished!!

this is the weird stuff women do

wait like a spider and bail if you think its taking the P

You're right man. That's exactly what I had gut feeling about. If things don't progress at all during this next date or two then I'll bail.

 

[TheNewStyle123]

One thing to always keep in mind is that an attractive woman always has 1 or 2 guys in her 'back pocket.'

These guys are there for when the Alphas that are currently digging her out get sick of her and inevitably drop her.

She needs to know that a nice, safe, respectable provider will always be there for her.

I'd still go on date #2.

I agree buddy - thanks for the advice!

 

[Bigpapa]

you mention alpha and cucking in nearly every post.

In the Uk , its safe to say women get pregnant by normal every day guys

it would be an interesting experiment to do an dna test on all the babies born in a certain year to see how many of them match the official dad dna

as we already have statistics that most marriages crumble and usually the women do the 1st step

 

[Bigpapa]

Sperm Wars by Robin Baker goes into this in quite a bit of detail. Eye-opening stuff and it's a really taboo topic.

Betas would start hanging themselves en masse if they knew how this stuff really works.

dunno if it is entirely true what is in that book , but what I know is that how things are at the moment is not really working for most guys neither on the short and neither on the medium and long term

so for sure most guys are missing something that would change the results in their favor

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

What's up guys.

Went on a date yesterday to a local spot with a new girl. Date went really well - we each got one drink and she even offered to split the bill (I thanked her but paid the bill, after all it was only one drink). We then went for a walk, I initiated kino for most of the date, conversation was good, and we ended up making out a few times during the remainder of the date.

I invited her to my place this Wednesday night for dinner (and she would bring us some wine). I have not had a girl yet that I have met in person want to meet up a second time prior coming to my place, but this girl asked if we could meet up again in a public setting prior to coming to my apartment. She said it's not that she "doesn't feel comfortable", but "it's just not something I usually do on date #2, I would like to get to know you a little bit better if that's ok."

IL seemed very high on the date and still does, I am just not sure if this is a characteristic of a more quality girl vs. what I have been used to from OLD (some have come to my place either on the first date, or most have come to my place for a second date after getting a drink or coffee first).

Definitely interested in seeing her again though. HB 7.5, really sweet, great conversation, similar interests, well put together, etc. My plan is to meet up with her again in person this Wednesday for another drink. This time, if/when she offers to split the bill I will accept.

What do you guys think?

Good for you. She's thinking about a relationship, that's why she's taking it slow. Is that what you want?

 

[LiveYourDream]

In OP's case, she's just using the "I want commitment, so you must wait for sex" ruse as a way to turn OP into dancing monkey that doesn't get laid.

You seem really riled up that this woman requested to start their second date, not at his home. Your response seems a bit extreme, to me, considering everything the OP shared.

I also am not one to see such interactions in black and white. Nor do I think those are the only viable choices.

They only had ONE drink. Likely not much time together. Sounds like they enjoyed each other. Sounds like they are clearly attracted to each other. I personally don’t see any harm in the OP meeting her for another drink out.

 

[LiveYourDream]

OP seems like he’s doing just fine to me.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

What's up guys.

Went on a date yesterday to a local spot with a new girl. Date went really well - we each got one drink and she even offered to split the bill (I thanked her but paid the bill, after all it was only one drink). We then went for a walk, I initiated kino for most of the date, conversation was good, and we ended up making out a few times during the remainder of the date.

I invited her to my place this Wednesday night for dinner (and she would bring us some wine). I have not had a girl yet that I have met in person want to meet up a second time prior coming to my place, but this girl asked if we could meet up again in a public setting prior to coming to my apartment. She said it's not that she "doesn't feel comfortable", but "it's just not something I usually do on date #2, I would like to get to know you a little bit better if that's ok."

IL seemed very high on the date and still does, I am just not sure if this is a characteristic of a more quality girl vs. what I have been used to from OLD (some have come to my place either on the first date, or most have come to my place for a second date after getting a drink or coffee first).

Definitely interested in seeing her again though. HB 7.5, really sweet, great conversation, similar interests, well put together, etc. My plan is to meet up with her again in person this Wednesday for another drink. This time, if/when she offers to split the bill I will accept.

What do you guys think?

Sounds like a keeper! We highly respect a woman that offers to pay for her stuff. Only then we suggest paying for the whole bill. If she just sits there and waits for you to open up your wallet then it is a red flag. But she offered and you made the right move by thanking her and paying for the drinks.

As far as her IL, she is def into you and wants to spend time and find out about you so that is a positive and should take that into consideration regarding this situation. While we would suggest not letting her make that call, and simply allow her to follow your lead and comply, because of her actions we would suggest meeting halfway. Go on the second date in public, keep enjoying yourself and being present, but be intentional about having her come to your place either at the end of the date (by planning the date close to your place) or making it a non-negotiable that 3rd date is in private.

if she does not comply, then she simply is not sure about you in that way. If a woman is sexually attracted to you (unless there is some underlying trauma or past experience), she won't have a problem being in private with you and giving in to your sexual advances. In fact, she will give you signals that she wants that.

About the bill next time, def allow her to invest in you. Many men make that mistake of always paying or doing all the work, while yes men lead, if you want a woman to chase you and think about you, you need to allow her to invest in you. Just like you did when you suggested she would bring the wine to your place. That is key. Think about it. So yes, not just split the bill let her pay next time.

Modern Man Advice

 

[LiveYourDream]

He's asking for advice because he's rightly sensing that there's something up with this woman.

You're sabotaging him by saying "it's all good" - there are clear red flags. The biggest red flag is her saying "I don't do such-and-such on second date." - That is an absolute frame stealing princess mentality (I personally find it amusing - excellent work by her. This type of stuff bamboozles most guys, and she can successfully filter out the betas with this line).

I think the OP will get sex. Especially if he properly escalates back to his place.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

This is wrong. Women pay because they don't want to feel obligated to have sex with a guy. Women talk about this alllll the time in their Dolly Magazines write-ins.

Women often talk about when a guy pays for her date, then he expects sex (like a covert contract). It's more likely that this Woman is just looking for a guy she's highly attracted to, and doesn't want to feel guilty about using guys for a free lunch.

Sounds like you got all the answers and know what women want and think, Nick Marshall. Thanks for sharing.

Modern Man Advice

 

[LiveYourDream]

He's asking for advice because he's rightly sensing that there's something up with this woman.

You're sabotaging him by saying "it's all good" - there are clear red flags. The biggest red flag is her saying "I don't do such-and-such on second date." - That is an absolute frame stealing princess mentality (I personally find it amusing - excellent work by her. This type of stuff bamboozles most guys, and she can successfully filter out the betas with this line).

Not everything undesirable from a woman is done by her as an insult or frame steal maneuver. Maybe her anti-slut defense nature would simply prefer to be able START the date out with a drink, rather than walking straight through his front door.