It's 2021, and the height-shaming is reaching catatrosphic levels

[LiveYourDream]

Many men are SUPER sensitive and/or insecure about their personal height, in a way that is comparable to many men being SUPER sensitive about their personal d1ck size. It’s sad and unfortunate such topics take up so much thought/energy, in our society and especially in men’s lives. I understand that many men have had bad experiences. That sucks. It saddens me they have been treated poorly and/or grown up conditioned to primarily/only expect sh1ty treatment/responses from women.

What is even worse and life altering, and most unfortunate imho, is when a man then chooses/defaults/ is willing to only see and experience his life moving forward, through the RESTRICTED lens of those bad past experiences/conditioning.

Are their sh1ty women in the world? Absolutely. Have those sh1ty women treated men poorly? Absolutely. Is it awful? Absolutely. Should that be enough to stop a man?

I am clearly not walking in their shoes. It is not for me to say or judge. What I do know is not all women are sh1tty people.

Why should those particular sh1ty women/experiences and their sh1ty comments, be given power, over a man and his life?

Why give YOUR power, as an individual and as a MAN, to those sh1ty women and their stupid sh1ty comments?

Why not keep/take back your power, say Fvck the sh1ty women and her stupid sh1tty comments, and move forward with your goals in life, in spite of her/them?

 

[LiveYourDream]

When learning to ride a bike (ski/snowboard/etc) falls happen. They hurt. They suck. It can feel like you personally are not able like others. You personally are doomed. If others didn’t push us, we could stop and give up and choose to believe we were just not meant to enjoy riding bikes like others do.

Parents, siblings, friends push us, encourage us to get up again. They can see what we can’t sometimes. They can see us riding the bike one day. They know we can do it, even if nothing makes it look like we can. Even if we protest. Even if we argue for our limitations. Even if we fall again. And again. And again. And again.

They see that it hurts. They see our frustration. They see how out of our comfort zone we feel and how much we may not like that. They see we think it would feel better to give up and just not try again. They get it.

They don’t take your struggle lightly. (Nor do I.) They also can see you succeeding in a way that you can’t yet see for yourself. They can see it. They believe in you. They encourage you again, and again and again and again, because they care. It is not a battle of ego and who is right or wrong. They encourage you because they care.

They know the potential joy and satisfaction you can and will feel when the time comes and all your perseverance has paid off. They perceive how amazing and empowered you’ll feel when all lines up and you finally experience riding free, as they knew you could. You feel the air brush past your face as you feel life bursting from within you. You have conquered and are experiencing new territory, in a new way. It is enlivening to you.

Some people feel so enlivened that they push to explore what is possible even more. They are less afraid of falling now. They push new boundaries. They may learn to ride hands free, do jumps and all kinds of tricks. May decide to go off road exploring into new experiences.

I understand it is not a perfect analogy. I certainly do not mean to be insensitive by using it.

If you grew up and enjoyed riding a bike as a kid. You knew the struggle to learn it. You knew your friends could learn to do it too. Everyone has different falls and a different learning curve to get to their place of riding free. We still know that others, if they are willing to persevere through their discomfort, will also get to that point where they too will ride free and experience the fun and joy and new experiences that come with it. We want them to have that. We can see that it is possible for them. They may not believe it yet. If they just don’t give up. They’ll get there too. Their delight will radiate.

It can feel like others just don’t understand a deep personal struggle and how it is different from theirs or their capacity to truly understand. It can be tempting and easy to just conclude they don’t get it. That’s understandable. At the same time...

Sometimes we can’t see what others can see for us. Others have a different vantage point of our capacity sometimes. They encourage us because they care and they can see that we can/will ride that bike one day, if we just don’t let ourselves get stuck in the experience of falling down. If we are just willing to persevere, they know we can have it too.

Be careful of arguing for your limitations. It’s what you will get.

 

[LiveYourDream]

Women have made backhanded comments to me about my height and I’m 5’10”. A girl I was dating even said “if I wear my heels am I going to be taller than you?” and I remember thinking “who fvcking cares?”. Looking back on it, she had the Hangup not me. So now when I’m rejected after a few dates I always assume it’s because the girl tried to like me but couldn’t get past that I’m 5’10”.

In many cases this is a woman walking on eggshells trying to figure out what a man would most prefer from her. Some men would be horrified to be out with a woman who is standing taller than he, with or without heels. Other men couldn’t care less. Some men would feel disrespected if a woman chose to wear heels that then made her appear taller than him. Others couldn’t care less. Some men find more flat shoes on women to be ugly and unattractive. Other men couldn’t care less. Some men would feel disrespected that a woman didn’t dress up in heels for him, when going out. Other men couldn’t care less. Some men are turned on by a woman wearing sexy heels and prioritize that over how tall she may appear, relative to him. Other men may find heels super sexy but never want to be seen as shorter than her, in public, so heels are out. And on the possibilities go on. How is she to know which man he is?

Some men have no issue discussing the topic openly. It bothers them not at all. Others are super sensitive and immediately interpret the fact that she is even hinting at the topic, as a personal judgement of him and his height. So rather than be direct many woman will hint to hopefully get some greater understanding of what the man she is seeing prioritizes and prefers.

Many women hint/ask in this way, as an attempt to inoffensively find out what would most please YOU, the man they will be seeing.

What would you like her to wear? Sexy high heels no matter what, low heels so not too much taller but still attractive, flats so not ever taller than you, or you couldn’t care less and she should just dress however she feels attractive/sexy and ready for a good time with you.

If a woman brings this up, it is not necessarily a woman negging a man and his height. It often is a woman seeking to dress to please the man and gain his further approval.

Be careful of assumptions. Before you know it, assumptions can limit one’s perspective. And that limited perspective can then significantly limit a person from achieving their desired results.

 

[deBrito]

This height stuff must be a USA trend. In my land this does not matter.

 

[Robert28]

In many cases this is a woman walking on eggshells trying to figure out what a man would most prefer from her. Some men would be horrified to be out with a woman who is standing taller than he, with or without heels. Other men couldn’t care less. Some men would feel disrespected if a woman chose to wear heels that then made her appear taller than him. Others couldn’t care less. Some men find more flat shoes on women to be ugly and unattractive. Other men couldn’t care less. Some men would feel disrespected that a woman didn’t dress up in heels for him, when going out. Other men couldn’t care less. Some men are turned on by a woman wearing sexy heels and prioritize that over how tall she may appear, relative to him. Other men may find heels super sexy but never want to be seen as shorter than her, in public, so heels are out. And on the possibilities go on. How is she to know which man he is?

Some men have no issue discussing the topic openly. It bothers them not at all. Others are super sensitive and immediately interpret the fact that she is even hinting at the topic, as a personal judgement of him and his height. So rather than be direct many woman will hint to hopefully get some greater understanding of what the man she is seeing prioritizes and prefers.

Many women hint/ask in this way, as an attempt to inoffensively find out what would most please YOU, the man they will be seeing.

What would you like her to wear? Sexy high heels no matter what, low heels so not too much taller but still attractive, flats so not ever taller than you, or you couldn’t care less and she should just dress however she feels attractive/sexy and ready for a good time with you.

If a woman brings this up, it is not necessarily a woman negging a man and his height. It often is a woman seeking to dress to please the man and gain his further approval.

Be careful of assumptions. Before you know it, assumptions can limit one’s perspective. And that limited perspective can then significantly limit a person from achieving their desired results.

As a guy you have to be very careful when complimenting a woman on her shoes. That’s a quick way to get labeled as “a creep with a foot/shoe fetish”. Now, women will spend $$$$ on shoes, pedicures, even tattoos on their feet, but don’t you dare say they look sexy in flats or a certain pair of heels or you’ll be met with “do you have a foot fetish?”. Probably why a lot of guys steer clear of that whole conversation to begin with because it’s a trap.

 

[BadBoy89]

Many men are SUPER sensitive and/or insecure about their personal height

Men may be super sensitive because it's what women want.

Why So Many Women Prefer Tall Men

What do you think is the ideal height for a romantic partner? Tall, short, or somewhere in between?

www.psychologytoday.com

Why Is Everyone Obsessed with Dating Someone Tall?

All those extra inches? In this economy?

www.gq.com

Why Women Go After Taller Guys, Explained

And here’s what you can do about it if you’re short.

ca.askmen.com

14 Reasons Why Women Like Tall Men

When it comes to attraction, there's no set rules but somehow tall men have an obvious appeal. Read more about why women find themselves drawn to tall men.

americantall.com

Women show sexual preference for tall, dominant men – so is gender inequality inevitable?

The fact that women choose male partners who can dominate them does not mean that women want to be dominated.

theconversation.com

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/to-your-health/wp/2014/08/27/tall-men-have-their-pick-of-the-dating-pool/

 

[bonesmahoney]

LMAO, this is why you all are losers: imagining the world is against you and failing before you even begin.

I played two sports in high school, had many friends well over 6 feet tall. They were just considered dorks and the girls weren't attracted to them. The varsity starting quarterback sometimes had a bit more pull, but not by much. The team was actually pretty good but football wasn't a big deal, except maybe to the football coach. That fat f-cker thought he was hot sh-t lol. The only tall guys who were popular with girls, were popular because they were good looking. Keep in mind, the average high school boy is what, 5'6"? 5'7"? There weren't many kids 6 feet and above. 5'10" was considered very tall.

Same thing in college: most of the D1 athletes were just anonymous joes. Sure, they could attract random fatties at the club, but overall were no more likely to have a girlfriend, much less a hot girlfriend, than a good looking guy of normal height. The D1 athletes with hot girlfriends were generally star players, the 2 or 3 best players on a team. Even this didn't happen with any regularity unless the team was doing particularly well. Otherwise, the women just didn't give a sh-t.

Even many of the star players weren't that interested in tail: they were focused on just putting in their time before collecting their millions as pros (before they lost it all again a decade later).

Take a look at any pro football or basketball roster and ask yourself how many of them are good looking. The answer is going to be close enough to zero to make the question not even worth asking. Take a look at the girlfriends and wives of the tallest players in the NBA. Take a look at any of the wives and girlfriends of ANY player in the nba: how many of them are hot? Most of them are only "hot" if you are into gigantic booties, geri curls and bad weaves.

Post college, again, I know tons of tall guys and very few of them are dating hot women. Most are single. Some are married, and their wives are average looking, passable in looks. There are a few very tall, jacked guys: some of them have steady girlfriends who are cute, but not especially hot. Others favor quantity, and f-ck a string of fatties.

My adult friends and acquaintances who are marrying hot women are almost exclusively military.

You guys very obviously don't get out much, have few friends, and are deeply propagandized with stupid blackpill memes. This manosphere sh-t is not based upon reality. It's all based upon memes/stereotypes drawn from worst case scenarios, not the overall reality of large populations.

The pool of exceptionally hot women is actually very, very small. And many of the hottest women look like absolute train wrecks without the right makeup, the correct lighting, the proper angles, etc. If they CAN look hot without makeup (very unlikely) their window is short: often just 5 years tops, with a very small percentage who can stretch it out to a decade. After that, their looks fall off a cliff, especially if they are white.

tl, dr: good looks trump all.

 

[LiveYourDream]

Men may be super sensitive because it's what women want.

Why So Many Women Prefer Tall Men

What do you think is the ideal height for a romantic partner? Tall, short, or somewhere in between?

www.psychologytoday.com

Why Is Everyone Obsessed with Dating Someone Tall?

All those extra inches? In this economy?

www.gq.com

Why Women Go After Taller Guys, Explained

And here’s what you can do about it if you’re short.

ca.askmen.com

14 Reasons Why Women Like Tall Men

When it comes to attraction, there's no set rules but somehow tall men have an obvious appeal. Read more about why women find themselves drawn to tall men.

americantall.com

Women show sexual preference for tall, dominant men – so is gender inequality inevitable?

The fact that women choose male partners who can dominate them does not mean that women want to be dominated.

theconversation.com

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/to-your-health/wp/2014/08/27/tall-men-have-their-pick-of-the-dating-pool/

You missed what I was trying to convey. Others will too. That’s ok. I know some will get it. I shared what was in my heart to say. Everyone has their own perspective and experience. That’s life. Some will understand what I shared. Some won’t ever. Life moves on. I wish everyone here the best.

I will say this again...
Best to be careful of arguing for your perceived limitations.

 

[bonesmahoney]

You missed what I was trying to convey. Others will too. That’s ok. I know some will get it. I shared what was in my heart to say. Everyone has their own perspective and experience. That’s life. Some will understand what I shared. Some won’t ever. Life moves on. I wish everyone here the best.

I will say this again...
Best to be careful of arguing for your perceived limitations.

These guys are hardcore blackpillers. The mistake they make is that they take the most extreme scenarios and generalize rare cases to the entire population. They're just not very smart, and can't be reasoned with. They're also very lazy, and fear any degree of rejection, so they come up with some ridiculous bogeymen: "boo hoo hoo, women only date men 7 feet and over."

They like wallowing in their pity party and playing victim. F-ck 'em. I say let 'em.

 

[BadBoy89]

You missed what I was trying to convey. Others will too. That’s ok. I know some will get it. I shared what was in my heart to say. Everyone has their own perspective and experience. That’s life. Some will understand what I shared. Some won’t ever. Life moves on. I wish everyone here the best.

I will say this again...
Best to be careful of arguing for your perceived limitations.

Not arguing perceiving limitations. I’m arguing facts.

Science and studies have shown taller men are more successful in dating and in life. Shouldn’t everyone go tell women and science to change their thinking, and THEN come talk to short men?

Short men can fight one, maybe two girls. They can’t fight the science and the entire system.

 

[forcerecon01]

I say add "height boosters" in your shoes. I wear doc martins with added " height soles" that makes it 5ft9 instead of 5ft8.

 

[LiveYourDream]

Not arguing perceiving limitations. I’m arguing facts.

You have missed what I conveyed
Perhaps written this way will make it more clear to you...
Best to be careful of arguing for your limitations.

Hint...
Gathering and then presenting facts to argue your limitation is... 100% arguing for your limitation.

Continue in life as you wish. Your choice.

Be aware that...
While maintaining *that* focus one cannot simultaneously transcend victim consciousness. Perspective will remain in victimhood. Life will be experienced as a victim.

(In case there is question, ^^^^ *that* focus = arguing for one’s limitations)

 

[LiveYourDream]

Cont’d

Everyone has stepping stones. Victim mentality is a common one. Some people get tired of it more quickly and make the choices needed to move beyond it. Some people stay in victim mentality a really long time. Some stay in it their whole lives. Some genuinely are not even consciously aware it’s their perpetual orientation in life. Some begin to see glimpses yet it is how they still choose to define themselves and their life. If they were to give that story up and the orientation of victim in life...well then what? Who would they be? What would they do? ....

Some will make the mistake and think that these words reflect a lack of empathy, with the way height plays into a shorter man’s experience in the world. Others will see that what I convey actually comes from a place of deep caring. Some say, too much caring. This post isn’t even about the specifics, of the height experience. It is to about the suggestion I clarified at the top.

That suggestion applies to victim consciousness about anything. I do not wish to offend anyone or minimize their experiences in anyway. Not at all. I simply feel moved to shine a light on what I perceive as a ladder, up and out of that place of victim consciousness, for anyone who might be looking. Do with it as you wish.

Again...
Best to be careful of arguing for your limitations.

 

[BadBoy89]

You have missed what I conveyed
Perhaps written this way will make it more clear to you...
Best to be careful of arguing for your limitations.

Hint...
Gathering and then presenting facts to argue your limitation is... 100% arguing for your limitation.

Continue in life as you wish. Your choice.

Be aware that...
While maintaining *that* focus one cannot simultaneously transcend victim consciousness. Perspective will remain in victimhood. Life will be experienced as a victim.

(In case there is question, ^^^^ *that* focus = arguing for one’s limitations)

I'm not sure what you heck you are talking about. I'm presenting FACTS and SCIENCE and you are saying 100% its arguing a man's limitation.

I'm just stating a FACT. I'm not arguing limitations, victimhood, or sob stories. I'm saying, based on SCIENTIFIC EVIDENCE and FACTS, that women LIKE and PREFER taller men.

If you want to argue this FACT, present a counter-argument to it.

 

[NorwegianDJ]

You're playing the game of statistics.

If I am short, I am less likely to be attractive to women.
If I have a reserved personality, I am less likely to get noticed by women.
If I am born in India, I have a lot further to go if I play the game of capitalism.
If I am an average looking woman, I am less likely to get attention from men.

Just because women ON AVERAGE prefer taller men, does not mean that it will be your defining experience.
Perchance think of it as a stage of evolution. Most people you meet will define you by your physical form and mental representation.
It is likely that you perceive the world this way.
In that arena, it is a limitation. On those planes of reality, it is a limitation.
If you want to live your life letting the average person define you, then go ahead.
If the culture you live in decreases your market value by a few basis points on the mate exchange as a baseline, why let that define you?
It is what it is. Move to the east and it flips the other direction.

If I see the world from my limitations or my weaknesses, they cloud my vision. They poision my mind. They proliferate. They become a filter through which I take in the world.
If you take these facts so seriously, then they will define you.

If you were taller, you'd have a better baseline playing the game of "being successful with women".
So you've got a little bit of a steeper hill. Perhaps you have positive innate qualities. You won't know unless you're aware.


But in the face of love, these details cease to matter.
And if you let it define your life up until that point, your existence could be too tainted to love and receive love.

On average, people have it worse.
Either you get what you want, or you grow.
It's your work. It's not your limitation.
Your work is to transcend it.

 

[LiveYourDream]

I'm not sure what you heck you are talking

That is evident. I shared repeatedly that some will get it and some won’t. That’s ok.

I'm presenting FACTS and SCIENCE and you are saying 100% its arguing a man's limitation.

I'm just stating a FACT. I'm not arguing limitations, victimhood, or sob stories. I'm saying, based on SCIENTIFIC EVIDENCE and FACTS, that women LIKE and PREFER taller men.

If you want to argue this FACT, present a counter-argument to it.

Maybe it would help if I say this...
I 10000000000% am NOT disagreeing that men face bias based on height.

Not at all. 0%

Also...
Perhaps it would help if you read what I shared with the words “focus on” instead of “argue for.”

Be careful of focusing on your limitations.

 

[LiveYourDream]

Don’t get stuck on what doesn’t work well for you. Instead choose to focus on your assets (your positives).

 

[TheProspect]

Don’t get stuck on what doesn’t work well for you. Instead choose to focus on your assets (your positives).

Could rephrase that as "Don't get insecure thoughts about what you're insecure about." Obvious advice, but not really helpful advice.

I think most men who complain, comment, or vent from a fatalistic perspective about height-shaming and women's preference for taller men aren't necessarily seeking advice. They want acknowledgement that the problem exists, and their viewpoint validated, rather then it "fixed" for them and others sharing why it's only in their mind. You're a woman, you should know how that works lol.

Women prefer taller men, all else being equal. It is what it is.

If you're a 5'3 man, your options will be severely limited compared to that of a tall or average height man, despite those on here whose 5'0 friend also happens to be the best player they've ever seen. The reality is you will be disqualified by many women on height alone. That doesn't mean at 5'3 you should resign yourself to a fatalistic attitude about your height...

Those who adopt a fatalism outlook often have their confidence negatively impacted along with it, which just needlessly creates additional constraints on top of height.

A man can accept height as an objective limitation while also optimizing other aspects of himself in order to play the best hand with the genetic cards he's been dealt.

Height is a limitation. With some women a man may be able to mitigate it to a degree, but with others they will be inevitably disqualified.

 

[Zontyy]

I’m 6’3 with some sneakers 6’4. Personally honest I never felt like height helped in anyway.

I find my hairy chest and white skin attracts Arab women and Asian but that’s about it.

 

[TheProspect]

I’m 6’3 with some sneakers 6’4. Personally honest I never felt like height helped in anyway.

This is the inverse to when guys who are below average height say that they've never felt like height hindered them in any way.

Unless a girl is blatantly direct and sincere with you, you can't ever be certain as to how your height affects the interest & attraction of the girls you interact with, except for the fact it does at some point.

Same goes with hair. I shave my head and have always shaved it since I was a teenager because of cowlicks. I've personally never felt that a shaved head has ever helped nor hindered me with any particular girl, but I'm sure it has. I've probably attracted girls for looking bad ass and I've probably been disqualified simply because of a shaved head as well.

Some guys can say that height or hair doesn't impact attraction & interest from women, but all else being equal, the typical women with options will prefer a tall man with a full head of hair.

But my point @Zontyy being that you rarely will ever know why you are truly disqualified by a women. In many cases, being not something is helpful. In other words, being tall didn't help you per se, but being not short did, if that makes sense.