The Myth of Chad (Who Has a Thousand Lays)

[fastlife]

Thank you OP. The myth of Chad is perpetuated by guys who never had a seat at the cool kid’s table, who never went to the good high school and college parties, who never made it into the VIP, extrapolating what they see from the outside looking in and filling in the gaps with their imagination.

I used to work in the nightlife. I’ve logged thousands upon thousands of hours in bar and clubs across dozens of cities and parties at a handful of colleges. I was plugged in with some regionalized celebrities (about as high status as you can get in this particular status-obsessed city); I was in VIP brushing shoulders with even more high status celebs than them. I’ve met ball players. I still go out and game in the college bars. I’ve yet to meet Chad.

I know guys who kill it, but they’re usually not the objectively highest status or conventionally attractive guys—usually they’re just socially really well-connected in a particular environment and when that environment disappears (they graduate high school or college or the club closes, etc.), they usually settle down or dumpster dive until they can rebuild a similar dynamic somewhere else (if they even know how to do that and didn’t just luck their way into it). A lot of those guys never do and just settle down. The other fact of the matter is that the overwhelming majority of guys who do have high sexual status in a particular environment will end up pretty monogamous with a cute or hot (or sometimes even meh) girl for months/years at a time. Very few guys are out to rack numbers—even fewer have the skill set to do it consistently.

Every time I see the Chad stuff, I’m just like get off the internet. Leave your house. Befriend the guys you think are Chad. Learn game. Try to take girls off of those guys. Stay at the bar til last close to see how rarely one of the good looking dudes talking to the hot girl actually leaves with her.

 

[rjc149]

It's also very easy to achieve 1 lay a month. If you're committed to the Game then banging 1-2 per week should be baseline.

Geeze, 96 different women in a year? Not only does that sound like near-total prioritization of women and game over all else in life, I think it's sociopathic. To be intimate with that many women and not feel a damn thing for any single one of them. No human connection, nothing. Just meet, greet, fvck, dump, meet, greet, fvck, dump, over and over again. I'm not psychoanalyzing you, but this has to be the way you fill some void or emptiness in your life.

Wilt Chamberlain had women throwing themselves at him. It was easy for him to have orgies with multiple women. For the rest of us, getting laid requires active pursuit of pvssy. It requires us to be in the game.

This sounds like being out at bars/venues multiple nights per week and spending huge amounts of time on OLD. Does a high-value, purpose-driven alpha male do this? Or just party boy "Chad?" What distinctions are we drawing between the two? All of the "giga-Chad" guys I knew were massively insecure, narcissistic, and much like needy women, required constant sexual validation to be confident in themselves.

I'm not hating. It's just -- 100 women per year is a lot. But if racking up a colossal body count before you die is your life's pursuit, then again, I'm not hating. I think it's healthier to strive for balance and moderation in any pleasurable endeavor.

 

[forcerecon01]

I’d say if you are a single guy and have 5-10 flings a year you are top 1% of men. Some guys don’t even get 5 in a lifetime.

Thats a reach. My best friend is the same age and is on his way to a doctorate in music. He can do some beautiful things with a piano.

He’s smart, in tremendous shape and the most disciplined person I’ve ever met, but doesn’t care to sleep with tons of women. Just not his thing. I’ve probably slept with 10x the women he has but by no stretch is he a lesser man, in fact he’s a better man in almost every aspect of life.

Women really aren’t that important honestly

I too agree with you man. Women aren't that big of a concern at all

 

[Lordeterra]

Thats a reach. My best friend is the same age and is on his way to a doctorate in music. He can do some beautiful things with a piano.

He’s smart, in tremendous shape and the most disciplined person I’ve ever met, but doesn’t care to sleep with tons of women. Just not his thing. I’ve probably slept with 10x the women he has but by no stretch is he a lesser man, in fact he’s a better man in almost every aspect of life.

Women really aren’t that important honestly

I beg to differ. Women make the man. You shouldn’t duplicate but women literally strengthen the man in question because they force you to be the best. If you’ve ever been with a bonafide 10 or done a successful cold approach on a 9 and slept with her right then and there from your charm and coolness you get a sense of superiority and ****y ness that is not attainable
Through other means. Other men respect you more and you see yourself differently

 

[RickTheToad]

I’d say if you are a single guy and have 5-10 flings a year you are top 1% of men. Some guys don’t even get 5 in a lifetime.

Come on. Everyone at least gets 5.

 

[SW15]

1. chad athlete at a D1 college. Let's give him 5 years in college for the sake of argument. What is his pool? It's sorority girls, female athletes and maybe a few dozen normies who are into athletes. How many total women are in that pool? At the very most, say at a university with an enrollment of 50,000, it might be a thousand. Second, how is "chad's" time occupied? Classes, practice, games and travel alone take up at least 50 hours a week, not to mention extra time for sleep and recovery. Add to that 10 - 20 hours a week for study if he actually wants to stay enrolled. In other words, "chad's" schedule looks awfully busy year round and doesn't leave much time for chasing stacies.

2. post grad chad in his 20's. If he's lucky enough to be employed full time and is relatively ambitious, he's grinding out 40 to 60 hour work weeks. He is focused on getting ahead, not getting wasted every night at bars. He has a social circle which includes work mates, some former friends and acquaintances from college, and a few stacies in the mix. This may be a couple dozen people total he knows well. Overall, his social circle has declined drastically compared to college. He's good looking enough to attract a pretty girlfriend and he wants to keep her around, so cheating is relatively rare.

I know many former NCAA athletes as a result of living an active lifestyle. One of my good friends is a 6'4" former NCAA athlete in a country club sport. He is white. If you were to look at him, he would look like the dream guy of every cookie cutter white woman. I'll give you a peek into his life as I have known him.

I knew him as "post grad Chad in his 20s". He's now his 30s. He slayed more poontang as "post grad Chad in his 20s" than during his time on campus. He never did non-bar approaching. He was a bar approacher. He had a solid full time job and was relatively ambitious. Despite working around 45-50 hours a week while in his 20s, he had enough time to go to the bar multiple nights a week and approach when he needed to do that. While in the bar, he approached nearly everything until he got what he wanted. He did look to close same night lays in the bars and rarely did those same night lays result in a 2nd instance of sex. The ones that did result in a 2nd instance of sex rarely more than 2 months.

As he approached 30, he got into a long term relationship with an attractive woman but not an elite option. He ended up doing the whole monogamous and monotonous thing. There may be a divorce in his future.

I was astounded at how he went from a living a "post grad Chad in his 20s" lifestyle to a more typical beta existence.

What is the lay count of these guys? At best, maybe 1 to 2 new lays per month, at best. That's assuming he doesn't have a girlfriend, and these guys are obviously more likely to have an attractive girlfriend than most guys.

Add to that, most D1 athletes are not good looking. Take a look at a D1 football or basketball roster and ask yourself how many of them pass the looks test. Chances are, it's a low percentage.

The bottom line is, most guys are jealous of a mythological beast, a unicorn that doesn't even exist.

During his peak years as "post grad Chad", his lay count was above 18 new women per year (above an average of 1.5 new lays per month).

While I agree that the "Chad" thing is overblown, there are men who are quite successful with women. Success can be measured a lot of different ways. Having extended, serial monogamous type 1-3 year relationships with women from ages 16 to 40 can be considered a success, if these women are all "hot" women (women most men would rate as an 8+) and he doesn't settle down for a boring, cookie cutter lifestyle.

Thank you OP. The myth of Chad is perpetuated by guys who never had a seat at the cool kid’s table, who never went to the good high school and college parties, who never made it into the VIP, extrapolating what they see from the outside looking in and filling in the gaps with their imagination.

There's merit to this. I've clawed my way to get in good with some cool kids at times in life. I went to some solid college parties but I doubt that I went to the absolute best ones. I went to a large public university so there was never just one awesome party.

I used to work in the nightlife. I’ve logged thousands upon thousands of hours in bar and clubs across dozens of cities and parties at a handful of colleges. I was plugged in with some regionalized celebrities (about as high status as you can get in this particular status-obsessed city); I was in VIP brushing shoulders with even more high status celebs than them. I’ve met ball players. I still go out and game in the college bars. I’ve yet to meet Chad.

I know guys who kill it, but they’re usually not the objectively highest status or conventionally attractive guys—usually they’re just socially really well-connected in a particular environment and when that environment disappears (they graduate high school or college or the club closes, etc.), they usually settle down or dumpster dive until they can rebuild a similar dynamic somewhere else (if they even know how to do that and didn’t just luck their way into it). A lot of those guys never do and just settle down. The other fact of the matter is that the overwhelming majority of guys who do have high sexual status in a particular environment will end up pretty monogamous with a cute or hot (or sometimes even meh) girl for months/years at a time. Very few guys are out to rack numbers—even fewer have the skill set to do it consistently.

Every time I see the Chad stuff, I’m just like get off the internet. Leave your house. Befriend the guys you think are Chad. Learn game. Try to take girls off of those guys. Stay at the bar til last close to see how rarely one of the good looking dudes talking to the hot girl actually leaves with her.

This is mostly accurate. Few guys get laid consistently from nightlife but it can happen. Yes, I mention one of my friend who achieved that for some period of time but even he gave it up for monogamy and monotony. The majority of bar attendees and college party attendees fail in their quest to get some vag for that night.

I think non-bar approaching is the better way to go.

 

[cola]

I beg to differ. Women make the man. You shouldn’t duplicate but women literally strengthen the man in question because they force you to be the best. If you’ve ever been with a bonafide 10 or done a successful cold approach on a 9 and slept with her right then and there from your charm and coolness you get a sense of superiority and ****y ness that is not attainable
Through other means. Other men respect you more and you see yourself differently

If you believe this is true I feel bad for you. Women are a product of wealth and success not a source of it.
You and that Pan kid watch too many pua videos.

 

[Lordeterra]

If you believe this is true I feel bad for you. Women are a product of wealth and success not a source of it.
You and that Pan kid watch too many pua videos.

Women are a source of your power as a man. If the world goes to **** and the rich doctor who’s a fxckimg pvssy but is a doctor by studying hard now I’d forced to survive in the wild like the rest of us the women will flock to the strong men.

 

[oc16]

Ha, I knew it.

Men generally DON'T envy another man's job, car, house, kids, money, looks etc.

However, that man has a hot woman on his arm or you know he is successful with hot women? Other men want to punch you in the face since They DO envy you.

Here I thought it was just me with these thoughts.

 

[cola]

Women are a source of your power as a man. If the world goes to **** and the rich doctor who’s a fxckimg pvssy but is a doctor by studying hard now I’d forced to survive in the wild like the rest of us the women will flock to the strong men.

What does that matter? That’s not the reality we live in, in this timeline we are in the doctor gets the girl over the strong man 9/10 times. In the scenario you mentioned the strong man wouldn’t even have an advantage like you think, the endurance athlete would.
No one was walking around with 25 inch biceps in Paleolithic times.

Also the doctor has intelligence so you could argue he is stronger mentally.. he also knows how to treat the sick or reset broken limbs, knows a little about pharmacology could perhaps craft ointments out of plants, potentially perform life saving surgeries in a catastrophic situation and most importantly deliver babies.. a doctor being present would be a huge asset. Nobody would f*ck with the doctor because they would need him for his services and to teach more people medicine. He would also be able to trade his treatments for resources, The “tribe” would kill you for f*cking with the doctor. Your statement was poorly thought out, the chick chooses the doctor in the scenario you mentioned even more so. Just regurgitated pseudo science bro.

See what happens when you don’t chase skirts all day? You learn to think.

 

[cola]

....Says the guy who thinks having 5 flings per year qualifies as a top 1% man

My c0ck would be covered in cobwebs if that was the case.

5 flings a year from 18-28 is 50 women. You mean to tell me the average man has had 50 women before 30? If you believe this is the norm you’re delusional. And I’m not denying that it’s possible to lay way more than 5 women a year, what I’m saying is that it’s time poorly spent

Dude, you’re chasing women investing hours of time into them and the multi millionaire is throwing them peanuts for blow jobs, investing 0 time.
You’re chasing fools gold.

20 lays a year doesn’t make you “Alpha” it just means you have a lot of poorly utilized time to deal with these h*es.
Real men are focused on real goals. Fitness, building wealth, helping their family and community, advancing in their field, building their portfolio, meditating, getting 8 hrs of sleep so they can be healthy, meal prepping.. if you’re really on your sh*t you use time wisely, not going on 50 dates a year.
And don’t tell me your banging all these chicks without taking them on dates cause then I know you’re full of crap.

 

[fastlife]

While in the bar, he approached nearly everything until he got what he wanted.

Right. This is a guy who had natural advantages and put in the work. But that’s a far cry from the boogeyman of Chad—the guy who women throw themselves at effortlessly and who has unlimited choice—that all the black pill dudes use to fuel their resentment and as an excuse not to take meaningful action with their life.

While I agree that the "Chad" thing is overblown, there are men who are quite successful with women. Success can be measured a lot of different ways. Having extended, serial monogamous type 1-3 year relationships with women from ages 16 to 40 can be considered a success, if these women are all "hot" women (women most men would rate as an 8+) and he doesn't settle down for a boring, cookie cutter lifestyle.
While I agree that the "Chad" thing is overblown, there are men who are quite successful with women. Success can be measured a lot of different ways. Having extended, serial monogamous type 1-3 year relationships with women from ages 16 to 40 can be considered a success, if these women are all "hot" women (women most men would rate as an 8+) and he doesn't settle down for a boring, cookie cutter lifestyle.

Agreed. But all these men take risks and put in effort that the black pill crowd won’t—whether that’s learning to excel in an area that gives them status (sports, music, comedy), putting hours on the ground to approach women (whether that game is learned or unconscious), selling drugs (legit a highly effective way to fvck attractive women, not that I’d recommend it), or even taking the time to cultivate a high value social circle (where it’s easier to fvck girls in the group). For any of those endeavors, ya, every guy starts with different advantages or disadvantages, and different guys will have different ceilings. But the whole, “well, some guys don’t have to work for it” is bullsh1t. Any guy who has consistent access to sex with hot women is putting in some type of effort.

There's merit to this. I've clawed my way to get in good with some cool kids at times in life. I went to some solid college parties but I doubt that I went to the absolute best ones. I went to a large public university so there was never just one awesome party.

Right. But that’s still enough real-world experience not to have illusions about competing against some infallibly attractive boogeyman. Especially if you keep up with the guys who do well in that particular environment over a long enough period of time (vast majority end up like your friend).

This is mostly accurate. Few guys get laid consistently from nightlife but it can happen. Yes, I mention one of my friend who achieved that for some period of time but even he gave it up for monogamy and monotony. The majority of bar attendees and college party attendees fail in their quest to get some vag for that night.

I think non-bar approaching is the better way to go.

I actually think the nightlife is the single best way to get consistently laid. Not the easiest (social circle is by far the easiest), but the one that has the greatest longevity and the most versatility.

1. It has the highest concentration of hot girls (assuming you’re in a decentish city). You can approach more hot girls in 10 minutes at a solid bar or club than you’d find in an entire day outside of that environment (unless you’re in maybe Vegas, New York, Miami, select college campuses, or popular high end shopping areas).
2. Most social circles only have a handful of hot girls, if that. They’re largely age-restrictive and they get older over time (you probably won’t be meeting any 18-22y/o girls thru SC past the age of 25 or so unless you go back to school). Once you’ve hooked up with a few girls in a single SC, there are no more hot girls to hook up with. That’s why most guys end up settling with one of these girls.
3. It forces you to develop social skills with a wide array of people (girls at bars and nightclubs are never by themselves) and develop the ability to stand up to social pressure. This makes it easier to approach effectively during the daytime or to pull from social circles.
4. You can build social circles from girls you meet there that you wouldn’t otherwise have access to.
5. You’re not restricted to a single environment or city like you would be for social circle or if you rely on local status at a certain school (another reason a lot of guys settle when they graduate college or move cities and can’t generate new options).

 

[MatureDJ]

400 Weeks vs. 1 Meeks

 

[MatureDJ]

What is the lay count of these guys? At best, maybe 1 to 2 new lays per month, at best.

That still mogs the sheet out of me.

 

[MatureDJ]

You may think you know Chads. If they aren't getting much sex then they are not Chads. Women decide who the real Chads are.

BINGO! The only reason Chad doesn't bang all the time is if he doesn't feel like it.

 

[cola]

So.....paying for sex is Alpha now?

Oh absolutely. Did you think these Instagram models sleep with celebrities and athletes Pro Bono?
They get flown out, and at the least get a shopping spree for their troubles.

You take her on dates, spend time with her, text her.. I snap my fingers and say be here tomorrow ready to s*ck my d*ck, give her some pocket change and send her back home and ignore her till I’m bored again so you can try to woo her..

Who’s the alpha in that situation?

 

[MatureDJ]

Women really aren’t that important honestly

They are pretty damn important when it's been more than week without having poontang relieve you of your sexual tension.

 

[ThisIsSparta]

They are pretty damn important when it's been more than week without having poontang relieve you of your sexual tension.

Thats the mindset of a needy man. If women are that important, you have nothing of real importance going on in your life.

That neediness for pvssy is something many guys on this forum have fallen into. These guys lifes revolve around chasing pvssy.

 

[Velasco]

Who’s the alpha in that situation?

The guy who doesnt take her on dates or give her a couple hundreds-thousand each time he wants to fvck her.

 

[ThisIsSparta]

The guy who doesnt take her on dates or give her a couple hundreds-thousand each time he wants to fvck her.

You guys are watching way to much porn movies.