Is it ever too late?

[Max Baker]

Hi everyone, I've been here a little while but this is my first thread in this great forum.

To add to @derby1 great thread about the power of walking away, the question i wanted to put to you guys is in regards to LTR exes, or girls you've been seeing for a little while and you have ****ed up by staying as a friend, making a few post break up mistakes etc. Bear in mind this isn't about getting them back, its about recognizing the bull****, standing up for yourself and jogging on. I'd like to think just about every guy and woman has made these mistakes because its part of life. Its how we learn and grow as people for the next time. And id like to add in my personal experience, its never too late.

However, it'd like to hear other peoples opinions on, Is it ever too late to walk away?

 

[Bigpapa]

Every journey starts with the first step

thus being said , it is never too late for your self to walk away , but if you Stay for too long in a situation like this it can be too late to salvage the dynamics between you and the woman of your desire

 

[Barrister]

Hi everyone, I've been here a little while but this is my first thread in this great forum.

To add to @derby1 great thread about the power of walking away, the question i wanted to put to you guys is in regards to LTR exes, or girls you've been seeing for a little while and you have ****ed up by staying as a friend, making a few post break up mistakes etc. Bear in mind this isn't about getting them back, its about recognizing the bull****, standing up for yourself and jogging on. I'd like to think just about every guy and woman has made these mistakes because its part of life. Its how we learn and grow as people for the next time. And id like to add in my personal experience, its never too late.

However, it'd like to hear other peoples opinions on, Is it ever too late to walk away?

The problem seems to be is that you don't seem to be healing because you aren't giving yourself the space you need. I am finally beginning to feel better after my LTR ended a little over 2 months ago. I am getting back on track but I have followed No Contact to a T for almost that entire period now outside of a 2 day screw up about a week after breaking up. If you continue to have contact, I think there is probably some part of your brain that is not letting that person go.

I know from reading your posts in the other thread that you have continued to talk to your ex fairly religiously despite her being in another LTR after she dumped you and even recognizing on toxic and inappropriate her behavior is to you as well as to the "new" guy. To answer the question -- NO, it is never too late to finally say enough is enough and go NC and begin to move on. It isn't going to be easy for you which is obvious by the fact you're making this post. But it has to start sometime and it might as well be now.

 

[Max Baker]

The problem seems to be is that you don't seem to be healing because you aren't giving yourself the space you need. I am finally beginning to feel better after my LTR ended a little over 2 months ago. I am getting back on track but I have followed No Contact to a T for almost that entire period now outside of a 2 day screw up about a week after breaking up. If you continue to have contact, I think there is probably some part of your brain that is not letting that person go.

I know from reading your posts in the other thread that you have continued to talk to your ex fairly religiously despite her being in another LTR after she dumped you and even recognizing on toxic and inappropriate her behavior is to you as well as to the "new" guy. To answer the question -- NO, it is never too late to finally say enough is enough and go NC and begin to move on. It isn't going to be easy for you which is obvious by the fact you're making this post. But it has to start sometime and it might as well be now.

Thanks for your response. We broke up in June 2019. I stopped initiating contact May 2020. She finally stopped contacting me October 2020. It's been a while and i wasn't contacting her much in that time anyway. It was more of a mutual split, i asked her to leave my house repeatedly and she finally did it. I was going through a guilt trip which in hindsight was ridiculous i know. The things i did wrong was i didn't cut it straight away when i had the chance, took me a while to recognize her toxic behavior and i kept responding to her reaching out.

I'm a lot better now, its been over 5 months since we last spoke, but was just interested in other peoples thoughts.

 

[Grinderman]

Is it ever too late to walk away?

For our own sanity and mental health, no, it's not too late as long as you are still breathing...

The damage (and thus, the repair) will depend on how long we allowed ourselves to remain in the murk.

We can only live, breath and act in the present so any time and energy spent on regrets about the time lost or what should have been done and said in the past will only further add to our own suffering and act as an energy suck. The past is a dead time and space and only ghosts wallow there.............missing out on the present in the meantime.

If the magic word NO needed to be said sooner and the walking away on reflection ought to have been done a long time ago, there's boundary work to be done.

 

[Dash Riprock]

NEVER try to put the toothpaste back in the tube.

It's exponentially easier and much more effective to learn your lessons from f*cking up, and we've all done it, and apply your new knowledge and experience on a new woman.

The KEY is to not repeat the same mistakes. Some guys seem to really struggle with this.

 

[bat soup]

Hi everyone, I've been here a little while but this is my first thread in this great forum.

To add to @derby1 great thread about the power of walking away, the question i wanted to put to you guys is in regards to LTR exes, or girls you've been seeing for a little while and you have ****ed up by staying as a friend, making a few post break up mistakes etc. Bear in mind this isn't about getting them back, its about recognizing the bull****, standing up for yourself and jogging on. I'd like to think just about every guy and woman has made these mistakes because its part of life. Its how we learn and grow as people for the next time. And id like to add in my personal experience, its never too late.

However, it'd like to hear other peoples opinions on, Is it ever too late to walk away?

It's never too late to do the right thing. It's not about the girl - it doesn't matter whether she likes you, respects you or even thinks about you. It's about learning to respect yourself.