why do women on the rebound come on so strong?

[Bigpapa]

@derby1 i feel you , but maybe this means that you should talk less with them over the phone , and escalate things in person

I think that you just thought that you have her because she is giving you a lot of attention , and did not escalate things . Or not as fast as you could have

always mold the iron when is hot

 

[derby1]

I think that you just thought that you have her because she is giving you a lot of attention , and did not escalate things . Or not as fast as you could have

I couldnt have done anymore, I met them twice within a week. I find their intensity interesting that's all. then they have the audacity to do a 180

You'll do in a pinch when their emotions are running wild but they are looking for something better the whole time.

I consider myself twice the male of their current partners, however they have the emotional investment, I didnt.

 

[Juanto]

If they come on really strong, just call their bluff and arrange a meetup ASAP. If they refuse or act coy, you know they are playing games.

 

[Bigpapa]

I couldnt have done anymore, I met them twice within a week. I find their intensity interesting that's all. then they have the audacity to do a 180



I consider myself twice the male of their current partners, however they have the emotional investment, I didnt.

if Things were so intense , did you try to escalate to sex ?

you should have jumped on them in the car , in the park , in a filthy gang next to a hobo that is taking a sh1t

them being intense is a green light to push hard for sex , nothing more

even though they were just testing the waters , it is also your fault for not having logistics and a proper objective when meeting them

 

[derby1]

even though they were just testing the waters , it is also your fault for not having logistics and a proper objective when meeting them

each time i tried i was met with **** blocking excuses, we made out and both women gave me hand jobs however didnt stay longer than an hour.....

this leads me to believe the women involved all had partners still sniffing round/or in their houses (well ofcourse they did because all 3 are back with their chaps lol)

 

[Modern Man Advice]

ill be honest i'm a bit pissed off these last 3 weeks, It seems an ever growing amount of women who are in sneaky LTR relationships that you would hardly tell.

What annoys me the most is how they basically love bomb you, send you paragraph messages, first to initiate. real feel good interactions. Only for them to vanish like you were the one coming on strong. when they make up with their chap

one even had the audacity to plot the future, and say stuff like "dont worry I wont scare you off". Then ironically she vanished on me, once she made up with her ex

Literally OTT HOT, to ICE Cold within a day...

All 3 are back in their LTRS, so i can presume its nothing i did. I've been here long enough.

Just a bit tedious at mo.

Let's get the important part off the way first. You are reacting too strongly about this. Don't let your emotions take over you, keep them in check.

Secondly, not sure how experienced you are with women but this is really common. It happens to the best of us. It's not a reflection of you, so do not take it personally. Women for so many reasons, but the main and most common one is attention. They simply want attention, stand your ground, and do not easily give your attention away.

Lastly, going back to our first point. Women are not attracted who do not control emotions and have them in check. They might say the opposite but the reality is they do not respect a man who can easily be triggered. And this is triggering you.

Hope this helps.

Best,
Modern Man Advice

 

[Bigpapa]

each time i tried i was met with **** blocking excuses, we made out and both women gave me hand jobs however didnt stay longer than an hour.....

this leads me to believe the women involved all had partners still sniffing round/or in their houses

dunno mate , sounds wired what you are saying . Why would you accept a hand job in the first place ?

in Addition to this , women give terrible handjobs

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

my main question is why women come on so strong, when their on the rebound, then they have the audacity to vanish like youve been the needy one.

They get dumped.

They feel a hit to their self esteem.

They choose a random dude.

Love bomb until he reciprocates.

Get their fix.

Flaunt random dude to ex.

Get ex back.

Later days, sucker.

 

[derby1]

And this is triggering you.

Ive been here long enough, Im more interested in the psychology behind it, cause i find it weird and un attractive.

They get dumped.

All 3 did the dumping, ex boyfriends were like thrush all over their SM, sharing their posts

 

[Modern Man Advice]

Ive been here long enough, Im more interested in the psychology behind it, cause i find it weird and un attractive.

In that case, if it's just a matter of knowledge and curiosity (and not that you are frustrated with this cause it sure sounded like that was the case) then let us discuss the topic.

It's a matter of validation. Women are, believe it or not, very insecure creatures. Not to their own fault, society and year and years of women imperatives and narratives. A woman usually after a break up seeks validation on her sexual market value, and worth overall. This is especially true if they are the ones dumped. We agree with you, it is very unattractive. Women are also very sexual creatures, to be honest probably more than men are. So a quick hook up with a stranger they met online or at a bar, can be a quick mental (from the sadness, etc of the break up) and physical release (they are very sexual beings).

What the issue here is, they know all men crave sex. And in a whether conscious or unconscious effort to validate themselves, they play games of hot and cold to tease you and milk as much attention from you as possible. In other words, women are toying with your instinctual craving for sex.

Like we said before, keep yourself in check and try to understand where they are coming from so you don't fall into that trap.

Hope it helps.

Modern Man Advice

 

[LiveYourDream]

They get dumped.

They feel a hit to their self esteem.

They choose a random dude.

Love bomb until he reciprocates.

Get their fix.

Flaunt random dude to ex.

Get ex back.

Later days, sucker.

Exactly this ^^^^
For women that want their ex back, this is a common strategy unfortunately. If you ever suddenly suspect you might be either of the men, in such a scenario, watch out.

 

[rjc149]

Women (and men to a lesser extent) who are on the rebound are seeking to bandage a wound and take some pain killers.

A new lover will distract her from the pain, despair, and loneliness of the breakup. If she was dumped, a new lover will validate her attractiveness and soften to blow to her self-esteem.

She will often "love-bomb" the new man to force emotional intimacy and closeness, in order to bring the new relationship up to speed with the recently ended one. Love bombing is also a function of her raw and often wildly fluctuating emotions -- the more she love bombs, the further and more suddenly her feelings for you will plummet in the opposite direction.

Remember, she's got an open wound and she's trying to stop the bleeding and kill the pain. Rebounds can develop into something more, but usually the fireworks blow up spectacularly before quickly ending in about 3 months.

If you're her rebound, enjoy the wild sex for about 3 months, then take your bow.

 

[SirBigBell]

Remember that women and men are wired differently and they run on different fuels. Women are emotional creatures while men are logical beings. Because of this fundamental difference, women value an emotional connection more than we do. We as men value the physical aspect of relations more and will seek to build and grasp the logic behind the paths of least resistance to successfully attaining that physical end product.

When a relationship ends, it takes time for the woman to unplug the emotional connection to the man. Anger, disappointment, or a quest for revenge may initially propel her to seek a replacement connection with another guy, but she forgets that like wine an emotional connection gets stronger with time, and is not replaceable at such short notice.

She showed high interest in you in an effort to try and instantly recover the warmth and comfort the emotional connection blanket she had with her ex provided her. She however subconsciously quickly realised that you couldnt provide what she was seeking in a ready-made instant meal package, without her having to invest the time required to ferment tasty aged wine, so she scuppered back to revive the connection she already had in the bag.

I would go as far as saying that you can date a woman post LTR breakup and be 6months in with her, but she would still run back to her ex if given the opportunity and conditions that permit her to do so. To counter this risk, a man has to hit the ground running and do everything within his power to build the strongest emotional connection with her in the shortest possible timeframe, in order to erase and obliterate any lingering traces of her former connection. Its the equivalent of a dog urinating on a pole to override the scent left by a rival dog.

 

[derby1]

She will often "love-bomb" the new man to force emotional intimacy and closeness, in order to bring the new relationship up to speed with the recently ended one.

Yes this is what 2 of the women did, started planning the future, etc etc messages saying real affectionate things. I told them both playfully to slow down. both have rekindled with their beta providers. However I believe they did the initial dumping not the men..

Both girls spoke of their ex's in an angry fashion on the first meet, which is ofcourse a huge red flag.

She showed high interest in you in an effort to try and instantly recover the warmth and comfort the emotional connection blanket she had with her ex provided her. She however subconsciously quickly realised that you couldnt provide what she was seeking in a ready-made instant meal package, without her having to invest the time required to ferment tasty aged wine, so she scuppered back to revive the connection she already had in the bag.

Well put, I believe both women also had boyfriends that ploughed resources into their homes. so of course lack of sudden cash would be a reason to recoil

Just out of interest all 3 have restricted me from their social media, this isnt the same as blocking it means we are still friends but i cant like or view any of their stuff (I presume they are trying to hide me from their ex)

They also all sent apology DM's saying "their heads werent straight" So I didnt get fully ghosted tbf

 

[Max Baker]

Exactly this ^^^^
For women that want their ex back, this is a common strategy unfortunately. If you ever suddenly suspect you might be either of the men, in such a scenario, watch out.

Exactly what happened to me. Except for the last bit about getting her back. I suspected she wanted me to chase and pull her out of her new relationship to get back together. But that is not my style as i told her to her face. Therefore, she decided to stay there while i walked away. On a side note, she emotionally cheated on her new partner for the first 13 months of their relationship with me. I dodged a bullet. Her behavior although is quite common these days disgusted me. I never really knew her until after the break up.

 

[derby1]

Her behavior although is quite common these days disgusted me.

Social media & society gives women everything on a silver platter.

Things that used to be reserved for hot Dimes. are now available to a mediocre toxic 2/10

 

[LiveYourDream]

Exactly what happened to me. Except for the last bit about getting her back. I suspected she wanted me to chase and pull her out of her new relationship to get back together. But that is not my style as i told her to her face. Therefore, she decided to stay there while i walked away. On a side note, she emotionally cheated on her new partner for the first 13 months of their relationship with me. I dodged a bullet. Her behavior although is quite common these days disgusted me. I never really knew her until after the break up.

I am sorry that happened to you. I am glad you got away. Her loss. She will forever know it.

 

[Max Baker]

I am sorry that happened to you. I am glad you got away. Her loss. She will forever know it.

She will forever know it for one reason only. That i managed to show her in person and while we were in contact that i changed and became a better person. Basically Max 2.0. She realized she jumped into another relationship too quickly because she never thought in a million years I'd change. I saw the regret and anger. Disappointing she couldn't admit it to my face but being who she is, it didn't surprise either.
And thank you for your kind words LiveYourDream. Much appreciated.

 

[LiveYourDream]

@derby1 @Max Baker All men, Do not let the sh1tty behavior of these/such women mess with your perception of yourself or your value as a man, especially moving forward. Their loss, not yours.

 

[BadBoy89]

“Sneaky women only care about themselves. End of story.

Fixed it for you.