Cold-approach of waitress/bartender

[Barrister]

So near my new apartment complex that I just moved to there is a waitress working at a higher end restaurant tonight who was very good looking, probably HB 8.5. She wasn’t our waitress though as my buddy and I sat at the bar. The place was incredibly busy and she was on the move 24/7 — but physically was very much my type. I maintained some strong eye contact with her a couple of times and she smiled - but it was from across the room. When my buddy and I got up to leave I had planned on approaching her on our way out but she was then busy with a couple of tables taking orders and couldn’t do so.

This is a place that I will likely be at a lot due to proximity to my new home. Any tactics djs have used for this type of cold approach when the waitress is not specifically waiting on you? In future I can try to sit in her section.

Cold approach is a strategy I’m trying to improve in. If this is a place I’ll frequent is it better to be seen a few times and talk to her to build a rapport before asking for the # or should you immediately let her know you want to take her out and ask just right off the bat.

Probably overthinking this a bit I know.

 

[SW15]

If you want to hit on service sector employees, meet them outside of their workplaces either through cold approach or your social circle. This increases your likelihood of success.

I once met a stripper through playing co-ed sports.

 

[Çharismo]

Don’t hit on women while they work. It might work for you but there is a high possibility that she will reject you. Chances are you aren’t the only guy eye balling her and if she is as attractive as you say she must be raking in money with all the tips she probably gets. Even if she does give you her number she might give it away just to get you away from her.

Approach her anyway but considering she is busy you need to quick and get to the point. Keep it short and sweet.

 

[Chubb46]

You don't know her situation yet, so no need to overthink. She could have a man. I would visit again and strike up some small talk,see how it flows.. be yourself. Chances are she probably gets approached often in her position.

 

[jimwho]

If she's that busy, pass her a note and leave. If she doesn't contact you stay away for at minimum one week.
When you do go back don't hold it against her. One look, a smile, a wave, that's it. See what happens.

 

[Çharismo]

If she's that busy, pass her a note and leave. If she doesn't contact you stay away for at minimum one week.
When you do go back don't hold it against her. One look, a smile, a wave, that's it. See what happens.

Don’t do this. She will not contact you.

 

[Chubb46]

How do you know? I mean people have been doing this for years way before this internet era. Why would it be different now?

 

[jimwho]

Don’t do this. She will not contact you.

Are you kidding? I do all kinds of fun different stuff, it's intriguing. You're not the boss.

 

[Çharismo]

How do you know? I mean people have been doing this for years way before this internet era. Why would it be different now?

You obviously haven’t been living in this century.

 

[Chubb46]

Don’t do this. She will not contact you.

I like this simple human approach jimwho

 

[Black Widow Void]

No doubt that there are attractive women in the food service industry, but they can also be the most difficult.

1. Part of their training includes being personable with the customers (which can sometimes be misconstrued as showing interest).
2. Due to high traffic (and a less difficult cold-approach) these women are likely to be approached more often. They're used to it and could be more calloused and/or smug.

But I get it. You're going to give it a go, and why not.
Here's my advice:
You want to arrive about 20 minutes before the business lunch crowd disperses. If you arrive too early, she'll be overwhelmed with customers. And if you arrive too late, she could be doing prep work in the kitchen (in college, I was once a waiter and it's part of the job) .

By arriving at the "20 min" mark, she'll likely still be on the floor. It might take several minutes for you to be seated, then several minutes for your drink order and then several minutes for your food order. And then, many more minutes before your food arrives. By this time, the crowd will be dispersing. She'll be going by the tables to get cash tips, but she'll not be nearly as busy. This is the moment that you make your move.

 

[Chubb46]

You obviously haven’t been living in this century.
[/QUOTE

No.. I'm a time traveler. I kick back with Socrates on the weekends.

 

[Çharismo]

Are you kidding? I do all kinds of fun different stuff, it's intriguing. You're not the boss.

You THINK it’s intriguing. It doesn’t work like that in the real world.

 

[Chubb46]

You THINK it’s intriguing. It doesn’t work like that in the real world.

The real world according to whom? IN THE REAL WORLD, YOU DON'T HAVE TO PLOT AND PLAN EVERY MOVE.

 

[Çharismo]

Let me guess you googled that come back?

 

[Çharismo]

The real world according to whom? IN THE REAL WORLD, YOU DON'T HAVE TO PLOT AND PLAN EVERY MOVE.

Look I usually don’t like arguing with women but in this case... you are right!!!

 

[Chubb46]

Am I in outer space? Do you guys really think this way. I'm new here, thought it was a fitness forum, but I see alot of dusrespect toward the opposite sex, mind games, etc.
And people take this advice just because??

If that's the case I would like the winning lottery numbers please, for tomorrow since everyone knows exactly everything.

 

[jimwho]

Let me guess you googled that come back?

Go to bed. Tomorrow is another day.

 

[Barrister]

No doubt that there are attractive women in the food service industry, but they can also be the most difficult.

1. Part of their training includes being personable with the customers (which can sometimes be misconstrued as showing interest).
2. Due to high traffic (and a less difficult cold-approach) these women are likely to be approached more often. They're used to it and could be more calloused and/or smug.

But I get it. You're going to give it a go, and why not.
Here's my advice:
You want to arrive about 20 minutes before the business lunch crowd disperses. If you arrive too early, she'll be overwhelmed with customers. And if you arrive too late, she could be doing prep work in the kitchen (in college, I was once a waiter and it's part of the job) .

By arriving at the "20 min" mark, she'll likely still be on the floor. It might take several minutes for you to be seated, then several minutes for your drink order and then several minutes for your food order. And then, many more minutes before your food arrives. By this time, the crowd will be dispersing. She'll be going by the tables to get cash tips, but she'll not be nearly as busy. This is the moment that you make your move.

I’m just out of an LTR so I am committed to doing as much cold approach and talking to as many women as I can right now. I get what you’re saying — it’s a very tricky set of circumstances but I figure what do I have to lose?

But thanks for the advice — that’s not a bad tactic. I actually do not work near it though - only live right next to it.

 

[Barrister]

Fzone her and make her come onto you, if you intend to go often.

I will likely be there once a week at least I would guess. It has a great bar/drinks so will likely hit it up after court fairly often. Do you think a better tactic is to try to build rapport before asking her out it sounds like? I somewhat was thinking that myself if I’m going to become a regular.