What's the best way to deal with a text from someone who rejected you

[Dam44]

Merry Christmas everyone

What's the best way to deal with a text from someone who rejected you.

I (made a silly mistake) told her I liked her and had feelings for her on a phone call. She said she was in a 'relationship'(didn't seem true)

I continued to text or call her for 2 to 3 months. Before I finally forgot about her and stopped texting or calling for like 2 months now

Now she randomly texts me yesterday, heys2, asking how I was doing and nothing else pretty much
Then a merry Christmas today which I simply reciprocated

I'm just passive with no excitement in my texts. This is the right way to go right?

Also, I'll be seeing her in school in January if COVID cases don't spike up(hopefully)
BTW, I'm getting other options already.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Always assume if a woman randomly reaches out to you that she wants to get together and attempt to make that happen. You potentially may have another shot if you show her you have learned how to not be needy and desperate because after 2 months you pretty much have a "reset" opportunity where you can almost start from scratch.

Be upbeat and positive but not overly outgoing.

 

[Dash Riprock]

Always assume if a woman randomly reaches out to you that she wants to get together and attempt to make that happen.

I'm going to respectfully disagree with the above.

Though some women may do this (10%) far more (90%) are just bored, lonely, just out of a breakup, etc., and just testing the waters or "throwing crumbs" as it's called in dating lingo, to see if you'll bite. If she already rejected you, months ago, what makes you think she suddenly realized you're the greatest man to date and how could she have been so stupid? Odds are likely 3,000,000 - 1. You said yourself she was making excuses about being in a relationship.

To play her a bit, communicate but don't be over eager and DON'T ask her out...yet. Let this go for a few weeks. If she's interested in going out, she'll drop easy hints and then you can meet her and keep it very casual. Almost guaranteed even if she did drop hints and you went out with her you'll get iced, ghosted, or dumped again as you'll likely only be a place holder for her. I've seen this 100s of times on SS and IRL and it's happened to me too before my DJ days.

Best to buy a new tube of toothpaste than try to put the old stuff back in the tube.

Good luck.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I'm going to respectfully disagree with the above.

Though some women may do this (10%) far more (90%) are just bored, lonely, just out of a breakup, etc., and just testing the waters or "throwing crumbs" as it's called in dating lingo, to see if you'll bite. If she already rejected you, months ago, what makes you think she suddenly realized you're the greatest man to date and how could she have been so stupid? Odds are likely 3,000,000 - 1. You said yourself she was making excuses about being in a relationship.

To play her a bit, communicate but don't be over eager and DON'T ask her out...yet. Let this go for a few weeks. If she's interested in going out, she'll drop easy hints and then you can meet her and keep it very casual. Almost guaranteed even if she did drop hints and you went out with her you'll get iced, ghosted, or dumped again as you'll likely only be a place holder for her. I've seen this 100s of times on SS and IRL and it's happened to me too before my DJ days.

Best to buy a new tube of toothpaste than try to put the old stuff back in the tube.

Good luck.

Yes this is possible as well, but after 2 months OP has a chance to utilize a pattern interrupt where he can be different from she remembers and pique her interest enough where he can open a window of opportunity.

If OP does the exact same things that he sid that drover her away in the first place tho, obviously that will be a waste of time.

 

[RangerMIke]

@BackInTheGame78 and @Dash Riprock are both correct.

She's testing the waters... Why? Who knows... could be boredom... need for short term validation... could be she feeling a bit insecure that day for any number of reasons... could be she's interested in getting together.

Assume the later, expect anything. It doesn't hurt to assume she wants to see you, and if you are interested try to get together. You'll learn really fast what her reasons are. If she agrees, and doesn't flake, well you have something to work with.... but don't get al butt hurt if nothing happens.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

@BackInTheGame78 and @Dash Riprock are both correct.

She's testing the waters... Why? Who knows... could be boredom... need for short term validation... could be she feeling a bit insecure that day for any number of reasons... could be she's interested in getting together.

Assume the later, expect anything. It doesn't hurt to assume she wants to see you, and if you are interested try to get together. You'll learn really fast what her reasons are. If she agrees, and doesn't flake, well you have something to work with.... but don't get al butt hurt if nothing happens.

In addition, this is a section of dealing with women that takes a LOT of practice to be able to get right in terms of results. By avoiding these type of interactions you inherently limit how good you can become with women because there are a lot of opportunities that come up over the course of your life where if you handle them properly you could greatly improve your results.

 

[TMK]

Someone reaches out once, you offer to get together. Declined.
Someone reaches out a second time, you politely say you're not interested in just friendship and offer to meet a second time. Tell them to get in touch if they want to meet.
They reach out a third time, tell them hope they are doing well and politely cut the conversation short.

There's no point ignoring people who reach out. Bitterness and resentment never wins hearts and minds. But equally important to only invest the same or less than others do. State your purpose, let them deal with that and move along.

 

[Stoic]

Good points already on this thread. Shes either seeking attention/validation or maybe interested in starting something with you.

Here's how I would respond. Maybe after only a couple texts back and forth.

"I've been really well. I'm taking a short hike at this cool spot on x day if you want to join me. Hope things are going well for you."

You will know her intentions with her next response.

 

[EyeOnThePrize]

@BackInTheGame78 you would give unlimited chances to a girl that keeps coming back?

@Dam44 I'm more of a one strike man myself, so if a girl rejects then comes back like in your scenario I would just have playful banter. If she asks questions I'll ask some back, but otherwise assume nothing.

The only exception is if she lays rose petals at my feet for weeks, similar to what @Dash Riprock stated. If she's constantly positive, making sexual jokes, and dropping obvious hints that she wants to get together, then I'll invite her to something I'm going to do with or without her.

Women are simple, if they want to get with you they'll make a bs excuse to see you or tag along with whatever you're doing.

My approach probably leaves some pus$y on the table, but it also saves me precious time on attention wh0res, flakes, and lower interest girls.

When you get good at gauging you can slice these pretty well.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

@BackInTheGame78 you would give unlimited chances to a girl that keeps coming back?

@Dam44 I'm more of a one strike man myself, so if a girl rejects then comes back like in your scenario I would just have playful banter. If she asks questions I'll ask some back, but otherwise assume nothing.

The only exception is if she lays rose petals at my feet for weeks, similar to what @Dash Riprock stated. If she's constantly positive, making sexual jokes, and dropping obvious hints that she wants to get together, then I'll invite her to something I'm going to do with or without her.

Women are simple, if they want to get with you they'll make a bs excuse to see you or tag along with whatever you're doing.

My approach probably leaves some pus$y on the table, but it also saves me precious time on attention wh0res, flakes, and lower interest girls.

When you get good at gauging you can slice these pretty well.

No, definitely not. I was referring to this as being his first time she is doing it. The first time I would probably be cordial and assume she wanted to get together and try and make that happen. If not and it happened again after, I would be cordial but not make amy type of offer and wait it out to see if she would suggest something.

Of course this is assuming that you WANT something to happen. There are times that I am turned off by what happened previously where they won't get any type of chance.

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

It depends if she is emotionally rejecting me or logically rejecting me; emotionally, then I back off but logically, you can engage with her still, even just to build rapport

 

[jimwho]

You texted and called for 2-3 months and nothing? Sounds to me like she misses the attention and would like to torture you some more. I wouldn't care if she had tickets to the Superbowl growing out of her vagina. My response is "Hello hope you're well, Merry Christmas". And that's it. If she shows up with flowers and wine wearing a nighty, then ok..

 

[mrgoodstuff]

In addition, this is a section of dealing with women that takes a LOT of practice to be able to get right in terms of results. By avoiding these type of interactions you inherently limit how good you can become with women because there are a lot of opportunities that come up over the course of your life where if you handle them properly you could greatly improve your results.

Staying in a "rejection" position with a female is a sure fire way to never become successful. You will train yourself to be in a losing position. You have to distance from those and deal with the women you have success with. As a matter of fact even one "lower" lady who takes you between her thighs and into her mouth will raise your "level" in this game. It's a game where success is fed and rejection or "need" is starved.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Staying in a "rejection" position with a female is a sure fire way to never become successful. You will train yourself to be in a losing position. You have to distance from those and deal with the women you have success with. As a matter of fact even one "lower" lady who takes you between her thighs and into her mouth will raise your "level" in this game. It's a game where success is fed and rejection or "need" is starved.

That's the whole point. Learning how to change the odds in your favor. Way too many people think there is only black and white with women. Either yes or no. However it almost never is that simple. There is usually gray...when you learn how to interact properly in the gray areas then you can improve your results in all areas because you learn how to shift beliefs and desires and wants.

Just because a woman decided that maybe you weren't the right fit at a certain time doesn't mean she wasn't interested.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

That's the whole point. Learning how to change the odds in your favor. Way too many people think there is only black and white with women. Either yes or no. However it almost never is that simple. There is usually gray...when you learn how to interact properly in the gray areas then you can improve your results in all areas because you learn how to shift beliefs and desires and wants.

Just because a woman decided that maybe you weren't the right fit at a certain time doesn't mean she wasn't interested.

Right but stop putting your coins in her game. Deal with ones your winning in. Others will become interested.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Right but stop putting your coins in her game. Deal with ones your winning in. Others will become interested.

You aren't putting coins in her game. She reached out to OP, not the other way around.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

You aren't putting coins in her game. She reached out to OP, not the other way around.

Good

 

[bat soup]

Merry Christmas everyone

What's the best way to deal with a text from someone who rejected you.

I (made a silly mistake) told her I liked her and had feelings for her on a phone call. She said she was in a 'relationship'(didn't seem true)

I continued to text or call her for 2 to 3 months. Before I finally forgot about her and stopped texting or calling for like 2 months now

Now she randomly texts me yesterday, heys2, asking how I was doing and nothing else pretty much
Then a merry Christmas today which I simply reciprocated

I'm just passive with no excitement in my texts. This is the right way to go right?

Also, I'll be seeing her in school in January if COVID cases don't spike up(hopefully)
BTW, I'm getting other options already.

Invite her over to your place and make a move on her. If she gives you excuses, never speak to her again.

 

[Bigpapa]

Invite her over to your place and make a move on her. If she gives you excuses, never speak to her again.

It never really works like that . I would say the highest chance strategy to sleep with her is to reverse the table , meaning you have to **** tease her without actually moving anywhere so she can put the effort to seduce you . The idea behind it is to make her more invested in you than you are in her

acting like is a normal courtship it does not work in this example

 

[bat soup]

It never really works like that . I would say the highest chance strategy to sleep with her is to reverse the table , meaning you have to **** tease her without actually moving anywhere so she can put the effort to seduce you . The idea behind it is to make her more invested in you than you are in her

acting like is a normal courtship it does not work in this example

I think if you play those kinds of games you're only going to end up wasting a lot of time on someone that is not really interested in anything more than attention.