WTF...Learn To Keep Your Hands To Yourself!I would say largely positive, like she isn't visibly distraught if I touch her arms, legs or hands, she's not pulling away... but then again, she's not really touchy-feely with me besides play hitting me
THANK YOU.WTF...Learn To Keep Your Hands To Yourself!
THANK YOU.You don't put your paws on a flatmate after 2 days, or 2 weeks, or 2 months...Unless she paws you and/or you have good reason!
What challenge is there for her, if you, a practical stranger, are 'stroking her hair' and grabbing her?
Agreed. I thought the same thing.]All the advice about 'don't wait - escalate', 'force it', 'go for it and get it over with', is Bovine Excrement...It's desperate, stupid and simpish!
There are two reasons why I'm touching her:WTF...Learn To Keep Your Hands To Yourself!
You don't put your paws on a flatmate after 2 days, or 2 weeks, or 2 months...Unless she paws you and/or you have good reason!
What challenge is there for her, if you, a practical stranger, are 'stroking her hair' and grabbing her?
Talk about uncomfortable!!
All the advice about 'don't wait - escalate', 'force it', 'go for it and get it over with', is Bovine Excrement...It's desperate, stupid and simpish!
This gal is your flatmate, not some skank you just met and are drunkenly trying to dry-hump on the dancefloor in some club!
Of course she'd say she "doesn't want to get attached". She is making it abundantly clear and trying to spare your feelings - Despite your not sparing her yours!
Quit being so thirsty, understand social awareness and boundaries, and learn how to treat a lady.
"Fools rush in" - Learn to have self control, keep your tool in your pants, and be a challenge ffs!
Never try to read a woman's mind. It is a scary place. Ignore her confusing signals and mixed messages. Assume she is interested in you and act accordingly.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
It's about controlling your eagerness.If 'going for it' is simpish... idek
Yeah, I've read through it and Pook is spot on. If she has interest in me, I over-pursued - I see that now - I need to chill and have some patience now. I've most likely caused her interest to drop by being way too eager.It's about controlling your eagerness.
Showing too much affection too fast can hurt your chance of having any relationship with her.
By touching her too fast too soon, you're telling her through your actions that:
This is exactly why Pook wrote these posts:
- You're too easy. There's no more challenge. She doesn't have to fight for your love because you gave it all to her too soon.
- No more mystery around you. She could read you out loud and clear.
- She knows that you're too desperate to be intimate too soon even with a flatmate
You must also be able to control yourself.
Very well thought out and stated.THANK YOU.
THANK YOU.
THANK YOU.
Agreed. I thought the same thing.
I don't have a problem with him "going for it"....if that means asking her out. But all this rubbing and touching,grabbing her by the waist,touching her arms and legs.....that's all HORSESHI.......err.......HORSE EXCREMENT.
This is off the rails. Can't remember who it was,but one member here said he didn't escalate properly. That's 100% correct. In fact,he did it backwards. The way it usually goes is.....
Guy meets girl.
Guy and girl talk....guy asks girl out and/or goes for the number.
Guy and girl go out on a date.
Guy escalates while out on the date........ That escalation will either lead to light fooling around,sex,and/or a second date.
The OP......he
Met the girl.
ESCALATED....though touching and such........
And THAT'S IT......stalled out there, never went beyond that. Three weeks in,and he's still talking about touching her legs and arms. No kissing,no dates,no sex.......nothing. I honestly can't even tell what it is he wants with her. If it's sex,he's going the WRONG WAY about it. This is REAL LIFE. The way he's going about it only happen in porno.
You don't meet a girl,start grabbing and touching,and just end up in bed.....this ain't Cinemax. The touching isn't even sexual......he's just touching her hands,arms,and legs.
At this point.....I don't think he should be touching her AT ALL......unless and until he asks her OUT. I'd ask her out and if she agrees and they go out,THEN start back with all the touching.....and he can "escalate"/graduate from touching her arms and legs to "other parts".......cause the date itself would provide the context for him to do so. It's not weird or out of line to try to kiss a girl on a date. It's not weird or out of line to try to touch her breasts while out on a date with her.
If he did it now at their flat......as "flatmates"........while having not done anything sexual in the whole time they've known each other,it'd likely make her uncomfortable.
This is a rough situation to fix,cause the ONE THING that could remedy all this is also the very same thing the OP seems VERY UNWILLING/RELUCTANT to do........which is to ask this girl out. That puts her on the spot,and whatever reaction she gives will INSTANTLY let the OP know what his standing is with her.
But unfortunately,it looks like we'll be in for a few more weeks of updates about him touching her hands and legs.
There is some seriously bonafide thoroughbred knowledge in your post and links that should be required reading for aspiring DJs.It's about controlling your eagerness.
Showing too much affection too fast can hurt your chance of having any relationship with her.
By touching her too fast too soon, you're telling her through your actions that:
This is exactly why Pook wrote these posts:
- You're too easy. There's no more challenge. She doesn't have to fight for your love because you gave it all to her too soon.
- No more mystery around you. She could read you out loud and clear.
- She knows that you're too desperate to be intimate too soon even with a flatmate
You must also be able to control yourself.
At this point you probably have a woman (or multiple women) chasing you around, calling you all the time, wanting to be with you. So let's talk about how to KEEP a woman interested in you once you have her. This is BIG! There is nothing worse than getting dumped by a woman that you really, really like.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
She's an attention whoare.I would say largely positive, like she isn't visibly distraught if I touch her arms, legs or hands, she's not pulling away... but then again, she's not really touchy-feely with me besides play hitting me
So she turned you down.........Made another move (proper move) and she's rejected me. That settles it now,
I'm glad you went for it and got your answer....and you're not gonna like what I'm about to say,but I'm going to say it anyway......she's not interested and it was just game playing. Thank **** it's after a few weeks and not a substantial amount of time.
Cheers for this,So she turned you down.........
CONGRATULATIONS. I give you props for manning up and putting yourself out there.
Would have been cool if she was interested,but that's how it goes sometimes.
I'm glad you went for it and got your answer....and you're not gonna like what I'm about to say,but I'm going to say it anyway......
I don't think she was "playing games". Going by what you said in your original post,she seemed to have genuine interest. Problem was you stalled it out by not responding properly.
Here,you said you made a "proper" move. I believe had you done that when you first met and she was giving you IOIs like crazy,you likely would have had a different outcome.
The reason I'm telling you this is because I believe that we should learn something from each encounter we have. Yes......you need to put this behind you and move on to the next girl,but you should FIRST learn something from it. BELIEVE ME..........the LAST THING you want to do is go through girl after girl,opportunity after opportunity,constantly losing out with girls....only to YEARS LATER find out it was something easily you could have fixed. That SUCKS.
But hey.......you straight up made your interest known,so you deserve props for that.
Made another move (proper move) and she's rejected me. That settles it now, she's not interested and it was just game playing. Thank **** it's after a few weeks and not a substantial amount of time.
Sounds like she was looking for an emotional tampon and was looking for making you that orbiter guy.Cheers for this,
I don't even think she was interested in the first place.
If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.
Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.
This will quickly drive all women away from you.
And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.