Ok yeah I'm not a male model but I like to think I have an above average body/looks, I guess you don't think so. I'm not a body builder, but have solid muscle tone. I'm on the verge of trying to cut the body fat. I think it's reasonable to also want my gf to have an above average body as well.
But you don’t have above average body. And there isn’t solid muscle tone from that photo - you’re hovering right around average. Which is fine. But I don’t think average anything should expect above average partners. That’s what people ideally want to land because of hypergamy, but probably won’t as you have nothing to negotiate with.
All of this comes from a good place from me, so please don’t take it as negative, it’s just my objective view.
I can’t say what your face is, obviously. But above average in that is fairly symmetrical, good angles of nose and mouth, fairly structured jawline and chin, nice eyes.
Highly attractive would be strong jaw, broad chin, high cheekbones, symmetrical, good angles of nose and lips.
Hair for both would be what compliments those features and face shape (oval, square, diamond, round) yours looks oval from the little I can see which I imagine gives you a softer, more approachable look.
And this is all based on evolutionary psychology of attraction.
Body would be lean 12% BF, visible abs (doesn’t need to be RIPPED, but visible) with good muscle tone and size, shoulders being broad and waist being thin, creating a V. Obviously legs would be built up too, big glutes, Hams, quads, calfs.
Posture would be near perfect without any robotic movements. And little muscle imbalances, especially if the shoulder/chest/upper back area.
I get what you’re saying about wanting her to be slimmer than what she is. And this is why I suggested my two options.
A) talk to her. But expect issues subsequent to that because of your negotiation power and possible resentment and her feeling a deeper shame of her body - which she already probably does to herself. But know that change would happen because of that convo. Who knows if it will be positive or negative though. It could just break the relationship. But you’re not happy anyways..
Though this strategy would be the preferred method once you build your body more. But I would do it as tactfully and caring as I could.
And if the relationship collapsed? Well.. you’re on a good track to go get a slim and fit woman like you already desire right now.
B) start hitting the gym hard and get your diet on point. Don’t be scooping any of her Ben and Jerry’s or going out for McD’s because you’re lazy that day. Because this is just about you and involving the necessary changes for you, which COULD inspire her because you’re upgrading your SMV.
And the whole time? Be physically distant and sexually distant from her. You don’t need to validate something you’re not actually attracted to.
I mean, you’d already rather give her hugs than stick your tongue in her mouth when she does nice things for you.
