Why do men on sosuave want to get married?

[RickTheToad]

I read it as it happened that morning and my gut instinct told me maybe it was the little one....maybe she overheard them arguing 'discussing' and he had his phone or computer open and she went on to try to 'save their marriage'.
When I was little, 8 or 9 yrs old, I might have done the same thing....lie and pretend to be the wife to embarass/shame in the hopes that Dad wouldn't log back on ever again.
If she really didn't understand that Amant e her father, was faithful and in love with his new wife/daughter's new stepmother.

She was a recovering sick little girl don't forget. When you're a kid, hearing parents argue can feel like the end of the world was near.

But hey, could be wrong.

I do not even recall this happening, so I didn't even see the thread that all are discussing.

 

[Lynx nkaf]

I do not even recall this happening, so I didn't even see the thread that all are discussing.

it got nuked
You're ok, ignore alterego Spaz

 

[Spaz]

This part is unwise for any HNW person. The chances of divorce are just too high. Imagine having to start over at 50 with zero or even less than zero? I do not see how a piece of paper makes two people better parents. One usually files for divorce once the kids turn 18 anyway. Now, if you mean religious, then I can possibly understand; just no State sanctioned license.

Doesn't matter if they divorce after 10 years, 15 years, 20 years or even 40 years down the road.

Their kids WILL HAVE BOTH parents for that DURATION.

BTW, do all marriages end up in divorce?

 

[RickTheToad]

Doesn't matter if they divorce after 10 years, 15 years, 20 years or even 40 years down the road.

Their kids WILL HAVE BOTH parents for that DURATION.

BTW, do all marriages end up in divorce?

Two people can stick together w/o a cert. from the State. What's so great about this piece of paper? It doesn't keep people together dude. At least it doesn't in the US; aside the fear of being left with nothing.

 

[Spaz]

Two people can stick together w/o a cert. from the State. What's so great about this piece of paper? It doesn't keep people together dude. At least it doesn't in the US; aside the fear of being left with nothing.

The "paper" from either the state or the church makes it harder for couples to just walk away when things gets tough, especially when there r children involved as opposed to those that didnt get it.

That's what's so great abt it.

The problem that many men are facing in ur country is the lopsided laws that might potentially screw a man in a divorce - that's the root cause of ur fear.

 

[RickTheToad]

The "paper" from either the state or the church makes it harder for couples to just walk away when things gets tough, especially when there r children involved as opposed to those that didnt get it.

That's what's so great abt it.

The problem that many men are facing in ur country is the lopsided laws that might potentially screw a man in a divorce - that's the root cause of ur fear.

Doesn't make it hard for a spouse to file for divorce any more. There is no longer a stigma and people just want to hurt people anyway they can; children or not. I know a lot of dudes where the wife left them and they were put through hell. Two, sadly, took their own lives.

Sorry dude, it's not worth that State paper. I have no issues with a religious ceremony though. Statistically speaking, that State paper destroys peoples lives. While, yes, the dude will try to work through things, but when most ladies are done with the dude, she's outta there. She'd be outta there with a State license or not. No reason to give more power to one side. Without the State sanctioned marriage, both people are on an equal playing field. Yea, the gov't can enforce child support and visitation, but little else.

 

[RickTheToad]

He talked like a complete man who found a high quality woman. But I have not seen him post in quite a while. So let's not talk about him.

No one is talking about him, it's about his choices. He'll be fine. He's got a good job, a nice house near the New York / Canada border and a fat pension. Whether this works out or not, he'll be fine. Just let this be a lesson to all others. The person you meet prior to marriage isn't always the same person after you sign the dotted line. They are sure as hell not the same person if two people divorce.

Thus, it's best to skip the marriage license all together. If it doesn't work out, just walk away.

 

[Murk]

Yo lets keep this 100

Amante did not practice what he preached, let him reap what he sowed.

Best believe when I settle down and marry (and I will, like God intended) it won't be to a psycho

He's too old and experienced to go out like that.

The lesson to learn here is, and I've always said this, take this forum with a pinch of salt.

We all live our own real lives, make our own decisions.

Amante fcked up major.

What happened to the other american female poster? The redhead?

 

[Lookatu]

The "paper" from either the state or the church makes it harder for couples to just walk away when things gets tough, especially when there r children involved as opposed to those that didnt get it.

That's what's so great abt it.

The problem that many men are facing in ur country is the lopsided laws that might potentially screw a man in a divorce - that's the root cause of ur fear.

I'm going to have to agree on Spaz on this one.

I can see both sides and even though I don't advocate marriage as much as I did before, the potential rewards that are there for marriage greatly outweigh the risks if you play it smart as possible(looking out for warnings/red flags/listening to so suave advice). Unfortunatley a lot of guys discover the red pill or forums like this too late after they have been screwed and thus continue having a negative outlook.
Nothing is guaranteed in life but the cowards will stay cowards while failures or success of great men will make them greater, wiser, richer in various aspects of life. If you find a great gal and everything adds up, I don't think you should automatically discount marriage and be a coward to try it.

 

[RickTheToad]

Okay now we are delving into hypotheticals which is pointless. I was a medic in the military. I was a Navy corpsman who graduated from fleet marine training battalion and was able to be the "doc" of an entire platoon. I was trained in combat medicine and learned about anthrax and other biochemical weapons. I know for a fact that hydroxychloriquine is administered to SARS patients and even covid patients in the VA (veteran affairs) hospitals despite all the backlash against it because of people's hatred for Trump. After I got my bachelors, I got accepted to numerous medical schools but I decided to be a healthcare administrator instead.

I probably could have been a physician's assistant. In fact I know I could have. But I would never tell anyone they should not be a PA. Just because I didn't do it does not mean my reality is any more important.


My question is...what makes you feel like you are on such a high horse that you think you can tell people whether they should or should not marry? Do you have any kids? Do you have any experience in THAT domain?

One of the greatest hubris of men is that just because we are good in one area, we think we are good in other areas. Socrates was wise when he said he knew very little.

You are a PA (physician assistant), correct? A PA giving advice about marriage and relationships.

I was a combat medic who used to be the head seduction guru of the entire city of San Francisco...And yet I am still humble enough to say "Amante knows what he's doing."

I could have surely gotten a better career than you in healthcare if I wanted to (I probably get paid more now anyway) and I can surely run circles around you when it comes to relationships and women yet I am still humble enough to know my place when it comes to a grown man's choices when it comes to marriage.

We should never use Amante as any example for any narrative.

The point is not marriage. The point is character. Your character will attract your female equivalent.

And Amante has excellent character.

I can talk the way I do because I have taught hundreds of men about relationships. I have actual merit. So tell me, what is YOUR merit? Is it purely your ego from the medical field? And do you think this makes you unique? Lol.

Sometimes I want to know the source behind people's "air of authority". A lot of times, it's just empty entitlement born from ego.

If all you are is a PA, then color me unimpressed.

Actually, yes, I was married and I detailed it greatly on SoSuave. I was also the one who filed for divorce and then moved it to an annulment. I wanted kids, still do, but was stuck in a two year battle just to undo that piece of paper. In total, it cost around 25k for me to get this undone, and her about 16k. I offered to dissolve it w/o lawyers, she disagreed. She tried to get my pre-maritial home and for me to pay for other things, she lost on every account.

Please note, I am not, in any way, shape or form, singling out Amante. The lives the next county over from me; or did. I am merely pointing out the actions, what I advised not to, and what could happen. It's a different world now in New York State than prior to 2012. After 2012, non-fault was now legal in New York. Which means, a person can get divorced for any reason and it will be granted. Average attorney rates in the New York City area is between 375 - 650 PER HOUR. That's where they get you.

I am just trying to head warning that this piece of paper could be the most costly mistake anyone can make. There is ZERO modern research that a marriage license keeps two people together more than just cohabitation. None. In fact, many Hispanic families do this all the time. We should learn from them and how they do things.

As for my background, yes, I am a PA in the Connecticut Healthcare system. My B.S. was psychology, and I did do some of my residence in a psychological ward in Waterbury. Over the past decade, I've hosted many No More Mr. Nice Guy groups and meetups in NYC.

 

[RickTheToad]

I'm going to have to agree on Spaz on this one.

I can see both sides and even though I don't advocate marriage as much as I did before, the potential rewards that are there for marriage greatly outweigh the risks if you play it smart as possible(looking out for warnings/red flags/listening to so suave advice). Unfortunatley a lot of guys discover the red pill or forums like this too late after they have been screwed and thus continue having a negative outlook.
Nothing is guaranteed in life but the cowards will stay cowards while failures or success of great men will make them greater, wiser, richer in various aspects of life. If you find a great gal and everything adds up, I don't think you should automatically discount marriage and be a coward to try it.

Tell this to the many dudes that off themselves each and every year after the divorce is settled. Unless you go through the system, you really do not know what the rabbit hole looks like.

I urge everyone to watch these two videos:

 

[Lynx nkaf]

Tell this to the many dudes that off themselves each and every year after the divorce is settled. Unless you go through the system, you really do not know what the rabbit hole looks like.

I urge everyone to watch these two videos:

#ThomasBall (if I have that name right) will watch vids soon....

 

[Epicenter]

 

[RickTheToad]

Bring it on. Living in fear is constriction.
The thing about a marriage is your not garanteed to make it. Same thing with flying.
Its not the courts that are the problem its the feminization of those courts.

Life is a game of chess.
Its interesting to see a marriage thread get such attention. Learn the game and go for it.
You will never see 4th and goal with 3 seconds for the win sitting on the sidelines. Warming benches is your name.

Funny you should bring up flying. If I told you the plane you are flying in is pretty good, but not that solid. You may have a 60% chance in crashing. Would you still fly in that plane?

As far as chess, that's mainly based on skill, not really a lot of luck. That's the contrapositive of marriage. It's mainly based on luck, not skill.

 

[Lookatu]

Tell this to the many dudes that off themselves each and every year after the divorce is settled. Unless you go through the system, you really do not know what the rabbit hole looks like.

I urge everyone to watch these two videos:

Those dudes including yourself had no clue about women or marriage before getting into it. Some are still ignorant but luck out and land a good gal, but some don't.

As I've said, if you learn about women, look out for any warning/red flags, are red pill aware, and gain some knowledge on forums like this, you will minimize the chances for a bad marriage/divorce.

Guys like you have a narrow view based on your personal experience and trying to find other's that's had same experiences. Doesn't mean that majority of guys have had the same negative experiences as you.

It's like a mechanic that's mainly gotten Mercedes to repair all the time. He's going to have a skewed perception that all Mercedes are bad and unreliable because that's all he see's. Meanwhile, he fails to see the other 80% of Mercedes just running fine on the road out there outside of his shop.

I talk to married couples all the time living in the suburbs. It defintely let's you see the other side as well and realize it's not all gloom and doom.

 

[RickTheToad]

Marriage based off luck? Lol would it have anything to do with your skills? No?
What about her skills?

People change. You know the old saying, ladies hopes he changes, dudes hope everything stays the same.

Those dudes including yourself had no clue about women or marriage before getting into it. Some are still ignorant but luck out and land a good gal, but some don't.

As I've said, if you learn about women, look out for any warning/red flags, are red pill aware, and gain some knowledge on forums like this, you will minimize the chances for a bad marriage/divorce.

Guys like you have a narrow view based on your personal experience and trying to find other's that's had same experiences. Doesn't mean that majority of guys have had the same negative experiences as you.

It's like a mechanic that's mainly gotten Mercedes to repair all the time. He's going to have a skewed perception that all Mercedes are bad and unreliable because that's all he see's. Meanwhile, he fails to see the other 80% of Mercedes just running fine on the road out there outside of his shop.

I talk to married couples all the time living in the suburbs. It defintely let's you see the other side as well and realize it's not all gloom and doom.

Almost spit my coffee out. Thanks for the laugh dude. Yep, I have no clue on ladies. Perhaps, you are right. And perhaps cats and dogs will fly some day with wings. Anything is possible.

However, in all seriousness, if you want to go down that rabbit hole, be my guest. Dude, I live in the suburbs of Connecticut, not NYC. I was in NYC 15+ years ago. Nonetheless, hypergamy doesn't care. But, you are right. Myself, Rollo, Alpha Male Strategies, Rich Cooper, Greg Adams, Esther Perel, Donnie Sharpe, Aaron Clarey, Terrence Popp, etc. We're all wrong. Gotcha.

 

[Lookatu]

People change. You know the old saying, ladies hopes he changes, dudes hope everything stays the same.



Almost spit my coffee out. Thanks for the laugh dude. Yep, I have no clue on ladies. Perhaps, you are right. And perhaps cats and dogs will fly some day with wings. Anything is possible.

However, in all seriousness, if you want to go down that rabbit hole, be my guest. Dude, I live in the suburbs of Connecticut, not NYC. I was in NYC 15+ years ago. Nonetheless, hypergamy doesn't care. But, you are right. Myself, Rollo, Alpha Male Strategies, Rich Cooper, Greg Adams, Esther Perel, Donnie Sharpe, Aaron Clarey, Terrence Popp, etc. We're all wrong. Gotcha.

Read what I said. I said you and other guys that's entered into bad marriages "had" no clue about women. You may have a wealth of knowledge about them now. If you "had" a wealth of knowledge back then, you probably wouldn't have married the gal that you did or the outcome would've been different.

 

[Lookatu]

it’s a complete illusion. Utterly.

Not in the media and Hollywood. I can't wait for Wonder Women 1984 to come out. Further brainwashing of young girls thinking they can be or do anything they want. LOL

I do admit that I had a crush on Linda Carter though back in the 80's. haha

 

[Lookatu]

Even that is an illusion. It’s make believe. They are just stories from a writers head.

Exactly. That was my point.

 

[RickTheToad]

Read what I said. I said you and other guys that's entered into bad marriages "had" no clue about women. You may have a wealth of knowledge about them now. If you "had" a wealth of knowledge back then, you probably wouldn't have married the gal that you did or the outcome would've been different.

Yes, I will concur. There were red flags I overlooked and thought nothing of. I was in my mid-20's and very naive. However, going through the court system has made me very jaded towards marriage. I didn't care for it prior to my marriage, so I am even more keen to avoid it now. And yes, I've shown several ladies to the door when given an ultimatum. Especially when I stated from the beginning, I will not deal with any lawyers and no marriage. Religious ceremony (and co-habitation agreement) fine.