Black Widow Void
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 24, 2010
- Messages
- 2,172
- Reaction score
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When driving, I like to do a lot of thinking toward things that I've yet to resolve. Usually, I can reach a solution, but this one is still puzzling.
Years ago, I recall a friend telling me that his wife (whom is now his ex wife) behaved in a manner that he could not understand. His father had passed and he needed time to process and grieve. It was during this time that she became unbearably cruel, heartless and overbearing.
Years later, my mother passed and I encountered identical behavior from a woman that I had been seeing. Did I cry over my mother's death? Sure, but I've never been comfortable showing this emotion and did so privately. Nevertheless, I was probably vulnerable (which, under these circumstances, I believe is normal).
The above also got me to thinking....
I've had plenty of relationships that on the surface seemed very good; accommodating female going out of their way to be present (making dinner, sexually available ironing clothes etc..) but many of them also had one particular thing in common.
They seemed to thrive on watching me fail. This could be as trivial as playing a board game with friends and my losing (I could spot a gleam in their eyes).
With another incident, there was another gal (after a few glasses of wine) that said to me "you always point out your own mistakes before I have a chance to." She said it playfully, but there was a glimmer of frustration in her voice as well.
If I was a controlling, belittling or an abusive type, perhaps I could understand this type behavior, but I don't see this in myself, nor has such behavior ever been pointed out to me. The women I date... do not appear to hate men, nor do they seem to have unresolved issues with men. It's not as though every woman I've been with has behaved in this fashion, but it's also not an isolated experience with just one woman.
I'm sure that there's a psychology behind this, but I've yet reach an understanding.
Any of you encountered women like this and/or have a theory to this particular behavior?
Years ago, I recall a friend telling me that his wife (whom is now his ex wife) behaved in a manner that he could not understand. His father had passed and he needed time to process and grieve. It was during this time that she became unbearably cruel, heartless and overbearing.
Years later, my mother passed and I encountered identical behavior from a woman that I had been seeing. Did I cry over my mother's death? Sure, but I've never been comfortable showing this emotion and did so privately. Nevertheless, I was probably vulnerable (which, under these circumstances, I believe is normal).
The above also got me to thinking....
I've had plenty of relationships that on the surface seemed very good; accommodating female going out of their way to be present (making dinner, sexually available ironing clothes etc..) but many of them also had one particular thing in common.
They seemed to thrive on watching me fail. This could be as trivial as playing a board game with friends and my losing (I could spot a gleam in their eyes).
With another incident, there was another gal (after a few glasses of wine) that said to me "you always point out your own mistakes before I have a chance to." She said it playfully, but there was a glimmer of frustration in her voice as well.
If I was a controlling, belittling or an abusive type, perhaps I could understand this type behavior, but I don't see this in myself, nor has such behavior ever been pointed out to me. The women I date... do not appear to hate men, nor do they seem to have unresolved issues with men. It's not as though every woman I've been with has behaved in this fashion, but it's also not an isolated experience with just one woman.
I'm sure that there's a psychology behind this, but I've yet reach an understanding.
Any of you encountered women like this and/or have a theory to this particular behavior?
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