For the last eight years or so I've been "dating" with the full understanding that most women are a gigantic pain in the ass and not worth your effort - I just treated it as a matter of fact truth about the world and went about my business. But, I also thought I was clever enough to filter out the few women who were "medium-term relationship material". Expectations were modest, I had the idea that I would settle for a string of MTRs, because who wants to swipe/date all the time, indefinitely, forever. "Oneitis", as such, was never going to be an issue, it just isn't part of my make-up anymore. So I felt like my frame was pretty solid, pretty well-aligned with the real world.
But since I turned 40 (42 now) I've been ghosting women non-stop, because:
The third dates fell away, and then the second dates, and then the first dates became less frequent.
And recently, after a promising, carefully-screened date started crying in the middle of lunch during our second date, it finally, really hit me, and I understood - from 35 and up they are all broken, none of them are "medium-term relationship material". There is, for all practical purposes, a 100% chance, that by 35, a woman will accumulate too much emotional and psychological damage to form healthy relationships. I wasted 8 years screening for something that doesn't exist.
I don't know who needs to hear this, but don't do that, save yourself the trouble. The kind of easy, effortless connections I experienced when I was dating in my 20s and early 30s, I just assumed that would continue to be available to me as my dates and I got older, and I thought it was a "mutual chemistry" kind of thing. Turns out it's really only something you'll experience with younger women. Hard lesson, tough to admit - adjust your expectations if you haven't already.
So if you're getting too old to date younger women, guess what? You'd better to come to grips with the fact that "relationships" as you previously understood them are over for you - that's the black-tinted red-pill for you. If you're dating women over 35, just accept the fact that your best option is ONS or FWB, it's not worth pretending otherwise!
But since I turned 40 (42 now) I've been ghosting women non-stop, because:
The third dates fell away, and then the second dates, and then the first dates became less frequent.
And recently, after a promising, carefully-screened date started crying in the middle of lunch during our second date, it finally, really hit me, and I understood - from 35 and up they are all broken, none of them are "medium-term relationship material". There is, for all practical purposes, a 100% chance, that by 35, a woman will accumulate too much emotional and psychological damage to form healthy relationships. I wasted 8 years screening for something that doesn't exist.
I don't know who needs to hear this, but don't do that, save yourself the trouble. The kind of easy, effortless connections I experienced when I was dating in my 20s and early 30s, I just assumed that would continue to be available to me as my dates and I got older, and I thought it was a "mutual chemistry" kind of thing. Turns out it's really only something you'll experience with younger women. Hard lesson, tough to admit - adjust your expectations if you haven't already.
So if you're getting too old to date younger women, guess what? You'd better to come to grips with the fact that "relationships" as you previously understood them are over for you - that's the black-tinted red-pill for you. If you're dating women over 35, just accept the fact that your best option is ONS or FWB, it's not worth pretending otherwise!
