Current situation

[Visionist]

Shouldn't have sent the daughter a request. She's your son's friend, not yours.

Most likely the mother trying to see if you're still on the hook, yes. Should have ignored them.

 

[RicBoy]

I think it's my ex almost 100% but I'll stay in NC... 3,5 months now

 

[Baibars]

I think it's my ex almost 100% but I'll stay in NC... 3,5 months now

Doesn't matter if it was your ex. My ex sent me a request for following me on instagram and deleted it afterwards. I knew that she was fcking at least one guy at that time. Doesn't mean she is interested.

 

[RicBoy]

Just one day after the facenook thing. Her daughter texted me on WhatsApp. She sent me a pic of her and my son playing online. She didn't mention about the Facebook.. Really wonder if my ex is behind of this.

 

[Stoic]

This. There are some (few but some) on this board who I would think have never experienced this kind of situation. But for those who have, it is especially difficult to watch. I admit I was there once myself, but it was that breakup that caused me to find the red pill. So while it was painful, it motivated me to seek answers that helped me develop as a man. But very quickly through reading the material, I realized I wasn’t improving for her but for myself, and the information I uncovered helped me to realize she wasn’t the prize... there was nothing that special about her. That seems to be what is missing here. He has the information but deliberately chooses to leave himself in this loop of self-inflicted agony anyway.

This will be my last post on this thread, but my final parting advice is: Start dating, do not put yourself in a situation where you have to see her again (IE for your son), and most importantly..... I’m going to make an assumption here.... I hope you are really reading this with an open mind and that you are honest with yourself, but you should give a lot of thought into how much of your desire to see her has to do with you thinking she is so great vs the impact being rejected by her has had on you. Many times it’s the rejection that devastates the man, not the loss of the woman. They feel that if they can just “get her back”, then all the pain and hurt of her judgement against them will be resolved and he can move forward with confidence that he is actually worthy and wanted as a person. This could be the key to your escaping this horrible loop you are stuck in: Realizing that only YOU judge yourself as a man. No woman can judge you or remove value from you by rejecting you.

Good luck to you and I hope you are able to break the vicious cycle you are in so that you can live a happy and fulfilling life.

Good post.

 

[mozarto.o]

Richard boy... This sh1t needs to stop. The only way to get her back is to genuinely move on.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Richard boy... This sh1t needs to stop. The only way to get her back is to genuinely move on.

Imagine being stuck in this loop for several years... Moving on means you are having a GREAT time WITHOUT her ( not with or without, WITHOUT! ), you have a new lady or ladies, you have your hobbies, your job is going well, you enjoy yourself daily!

They will come back sniffing around later. But you do this for yourself, not to get her back. Just accept the way the world works with respect to this particular scenario. It's been beaten to death by ALL the coaches and millions of men.

 

[Medina]

So I sent her a friend request she accepted it.

Last night I posted a new pic of me in facebook. Today morning before 6am she removed me from friends. The right after, sent me a friend request again and canceled it immediately. I sent again a friend request back and she declined.

I can't possible imagine this being her daughter. I never saw her daughter awake before 6am, let alone seeing a pic of me would triggering her to remove me.

Seems like it's my ex playing games trying to get a reaction of me?

You posted the fb pic because you wanted her to see it didn't you?

You kill all the mystery and lose all the frame in everything you've done

Incredibly painful thread. Perhaps #1 painful I've ever seen

Move on mate

 

[mrgoodstuff]

You posted the fb pic because you wanted her to see it didn't you?

You kill all the mystery and lose all the frame in everything you've done

Incredibly painful thread. Perhaps #1 painful I've ever seen

Move on mate

Any time you do something to "try" to get her attention or even "think" about or even position yourself for her in the future is WEAKNESS. You are hurting yourself and preventing any accumulation of WORTHY, ATTRACTIVE, MASCULINE SWAG. The new lady will solidify this for you. Move on.

 

[RicBoy]

It's been beaten to death by ALL the coaches and millions of men.

Bro lol

 

[Aniki1818]

This. There are some (few but some) on this board who I would think have never experienced this kind of situation. But for those who have, it is especially difficult to watch. I admit I was there once myself, but it was that breakup that caused me to find the red pill. So while it was painful, it motivated me to seek answers that helped me develop as a man. But very quickly through reading the material, I realized I wasn’t improving for her but for myself, and the information I uncovered helped me to realize she wasn’t the prize... there was nothing that special about her. That seems to be what is missing here. He has the information but deliberately chooses to leave himself in this loop of self-inflicted agony anyway.

This will be my last post on this thread, but my final parting advice is: Start dating, do not put yourself in a situation where you have to see her again (IE for your son), and most importantly..... I’m going to make an assumption here.... I hope you are really reading this with an open mind and that you are honest with yourself, but you should give a lot of thought into how much of your desire to see her has to do with you thinking she is so great vs the impact being rejected by her has had on you. Many times it’s the rejection that devastates the man, not the loss of the woman. They feel that if they can just “get her back”, then all the pain and hurt of her judgement against them will be resolved and he can move forward with confidence that he is actually worthy and wanted as a person. This could be the key to your escaping this horrible loop you are stuck in: Realizing that only YOU judge yourself as a man. No woman can judge you or remove value from you by rejecting you.

Good luck to you and I hope you are able to break the vicious cycle you are in so that you can live a happy and fulfilling life.

I missed this post entirely. I'm there now as well. I know what Ricboy is going through. You hit it on the head. I, through self awareness realizes that even if she came back, and I had her the way that I wanted, it would probably last two weeks before I re-enter a world of hell again.

The her moving on so quickly is the pain. The thought of "nobody fckn does this to me" is the pain. It's her tossing away what I thought was sentimental is the pain. The regret of how she perceives me when there are literally others who think so highly of me, that is the pain. I have devalued myself in her eyes, that's the pain. The last person I want to not be repulsed by me is the only one that does at this moment. You can have it all and achieve much in life with looks and money and social status, but if a woman is not in love with you, then she is NOT IN LOVE WITH YOU. That is the pain. That is what it takes for you to wake up. Take the red pill and be a better man.

 

[metalwater]

OP, Sir, there is a way to get her back.... I think none have told you because it is very hard to do and also not nice... most of these men are actually nice, but with style. usually the real asses don't seem to stay.

What you do is be an ASS to her. really REALLY. do not misunderstand.. DO NOT EVER physically hurt her or even pretend to or threaten, NEVER. But do be a total ASS to her. Say mean things, you will know what those are as you know her. ALL responses shall be irritating and rude to her. Go overboard about it, really make a point of it. At the same time FORCE yourself to find at least THREE or more girls to go on a date with, one at a time.... One of the girls, you will tell your problems about... The best looking one you will not tell and instead present yourself as a hard working man that has been avoiding women so as to get your other self in line (money, health, future). Make sure to have a good story to tell about how your progressing in life. Don't brag... just a topic and also ask her about what she likes in life..and why. The THIRD, not so good looking but sexy.. don't tell her much at all and certainly nothing about your problems. Just flirt and be physcal with her. Let me/us know when you have done this and then will give you the rest of the details of what next.. IT can be done..

It is a contest of wills... you MUST do these things to win that contest. Girls have extra senses and social awareness that you and I do not have. This is really hard for you to do, I understand as you don't want to. This is how you do it. It is really this way. Later in life you will remember this and teach another when it happens to them. This situation has been going in for men for thousands of years.

Good Luck.

 

[Black Widow Void]

Although I'm from the school of 'it's best to move on" category, I can still provide info on how to get her back. These things rarely work themselves out... but we all think that we're gong to be the exception.

I'm not going through 11 pages to get the answer. Do you still want her back? If so, I'll provide a follow up.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

OP, Sir, there is a way to get her back.... I think none have told you because it is very hard to do and also not nice... most of these men are actually nice, but with style. usually the real asses don't seem to stay.

What you do is be an ASS to her. really REALLY. do not misunderstand.. DO NOT EVER physically hurt her or even pretend to or threaten, NEVER. But do be a total ASS to her. Say mean things, you will know what those are as you know her. ALL responses shall be irritating and rude to her. Go overboard about it, really make a point of it. At the same time FORCE yourself to find at least THREE or more girls to go on a date with, one at a time.... One of the girls, you will tell your problems about... The best looking one you will not tell and instead present yourself as a hard working man that has been avoiding women so as to get your other self in line (money, health, future). Make sure to have a good story to tell about how your progressing in life. Don't brag... just a topic and also ask her about what she likes in life..and why. The THIRD, not so good looking but sexy.. don't tell her much at all and certainly nothing about your problems. Just flirt and be physcal with her. Let me/us know when you have done this and then will give you the rest of the details of what next.. IT can be done..

It is a contest of wills... you MUST do these things to win that contest. Girls have extra senses and social awareness that you and I do not have. This is really hard for you to do, I understand as you don't want to. This is how you do it. It is really this way. Later in life you will remember this and teach another when it happens to them. This situation has been going in for men for thousands of years.

Good Luck.

This is actually good shyt but he's not strong enough yet to do it. When he is he will use social currents and waves to his advantage.

 

[Aniki1818]

This is actually good shyt but he's not strong enough yet to do it. When he is he will use social currents and waves to his advantage.

That's so funny, I plan to do exactly that when I hear from her again. But she has to initiate it first.

For me right now now it has to be 3 attempts exactly to get a hold of me. Not one, not two. By the third I'm just gonna reply to her to go 'get a hotel room and wait for me there'. In which she will pay for it and wait for me exactly there while I show up fashionably late. Otherwise we are not having a conversation. That is only way right now. I am not breaking my NC.

 

[RicBoy]

Well, she will come around in August a d from then 2 or 3 times a month to pick up my kid for playdates. I was coached by blackbookbasics and they told me when she comes around for the kids to do this.
---
On a good note I’d say you still have a slim chance with her. This probably Isint what you wanna hear but you definitely wanna continue to go no contact with her at this point.


To answer your question about how to proceeds from here:


If or when she does contact you about your son then just be charming and playful, no serious conversations and DONT bring up the past.
DONT argue with her.
Keep the small talk to a minimum.
Try to control any anger that you have towards her.
Don’t ask about her new boyfriend
Don’t ask her on a date until she shows clear signs that she’s wanting to.
Flirt with her. !!! You need to bring back the sexual chemistry between you two.
It’s okay to say NO to her. If or when she does come to pick up your son brush her off like she’s not a big deal. Say HI and be cool w her, but keep in mind she’s expecting you to chase, beg or start an argument.

 

[Aniki1818]

I would still go with Metalwaters opinion. Be indifferent mostly. Be an ass if need be. She has not earned your flirtations.

 

[RicBoy]

I think all I have to do is wait. She will come around in August. She texted my son happy birthday that she misses ans can't wait to see him in August and after that..that he is always welcomed in her house.

Her faughter had me blocked... Now she started to text me here and there. I start to see smoke signs from my ex. The facabook thing her daughter added me then removed me, probably was my ex.

I'm also doing good in life, u never had this much money and never trained so hard at the gym.
I think of it's meant to come back she will see my changes in August and eventually close the gap between us. The reason I don't wanna break. NC is because I know my August (6 months NC) she will come around with her tail between her legs.

 

[RicBoy]

I would still go with Metalwaters opinion. Be indifferent mostly. Be an ass if need be. She has not earned your flirtations.

Yeah man, im not gonna flirt. When she comes to. My doorstep, hi and bye. Here is the kid. No invitations, no wanna come inside. Nothing. No asking nothing about her. Minimal contact. I was unemployed and living with a roomate. She will cry when she sees my 2 cars parked in front of my new home near the sea.

I think if I keep things this way, one of the times she takes my son, she will probably ask me to join them to the beach or so. Or asks me inside her place for coffee when I bring my soon to her doorstep sometimes. When she sees I'm not doing anything to get her back she will probably test me and close the gap between us

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I think all I have to do is wait. She will come around in August. She texted my son happy birthday that she misses ans can't wait to see him in August and after that..that he is always welcomed in her house.

Her faughter had me blocked... Now she started to text me here and there. I start to see smoke signs from my ex. The facabook thing her daughter added me then removed me, probably was my ex.

I'm also doing good in life, u never had this much money and never trained so hard at the gym.
I think of it's meant to come back she will see my changes in August and eventually close the gap between us. The reason I don't wanna break. NC is because I know my August (6 months NC) she will come around with her tail between her legs.

Dude the situations do not magically pick up where they left off. She had another man. You've done nothing for yourself. She'd have to show more interest than the babe(s) your currently fvcking for it to work out. Live your life get a babe and maybe something might work in your favor. Hang around waiting for her and You'll no chance. Remember she just shyt tested to see if your on the hook and she jerked you back and forth. Weakness.