How to keep oneself from catching feelings?

[sosumba]

How would one keep oneself from cathing feelings when dealing with girls? From my own experience my frame goes ot ****ters as soon as I start cathing feelings while I start rationalizing bad behaviour later on. So how does one avoid catching feelings and stay cold hearted?

 

[lamath]

Feelings i dont see as the issue. Scarcity in the man's life and maybe too much focus on a woman.

Feelings = Scrarcity = Supply< Demand


Need to be able to see things from a objective point of view, things learning stoicism can very be helpful.

On my part i find that a very good strategy is lots of ****ing, after a while i get tired of ****ing her.
In ways its like when your starving any food look good, once full you can chose food more wisely.

 

[Medina]

When you truly understand female nature it is actually quite hard to have any feelings for them at all

 

[lamath]

When you truly understand female nature it is actually quite hard to have any feelings for them at all

True

This is why rp ppl say dont settle until you **** a bunch of women.Wisdom and experience are needed.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

It is ok to catch feelings. What you need to do is be mindful of the exact types of feeling you catch.

The feeling of neediness is the biggest one to avoid. You should not depend on a girl for anything. You should be happy and complete alone, and happy and complete with a girl. None of your identity should come from being with her. You should not let your social life or hobbies wither away to be replaced by more time with the girl. You should be confident, and not in scarcity, so that while you like or love this girl, you KNOW you could find another girl if things didn't work out with this one and as such, you set clear boundaries in the relationship because you aren't afraid of losing her. That's the key - not being afraid of losing her. That's the opposite of neediness and scarcity.

That's really it.

 

[lamath]

Scarcity= misdirected feelings. Supply means you can direct or choose who you choose to care about.

OPs catching feelings question comes scarcity. Who chooses a girl he will not care about on a day to day level.

Your confusing "feelings" with "oneitis" big difference IMO

Like Rollo quoted today.
For a man to not give a ****. He has to truely not give a shyt.
Catching oneitis is lying to yourself.

Wise word in there
Cant argue with much of this. You re right !
Feeling does not mean oneitis.


I just see it like supply value goes up proportionally to the offset between offer< demand, higher value imo is more chance of oneitis.

 

[corrector]

As other posters suggest, all you have is a catch-22 that won't make sense because if you didn't have a scarcity problem then you wouldn't be having such an issue in the first place. There are other aspects, which depend on how you are wired, how much charisma (which could be silent) the personality of the girl has (i.e. a flat hot lady is different from a dynamic average lady because you may feel like you have a better chance and enjoy her company, compatibility (she likes what you enjoy enthusiastically, etc....)

The question is what is it about this girl that you feel you are liable to catch feelings? How is she appealing to you as a person that you want a soul-connection with her and feel like you can share you life with her? You don't catch feelings for a boring hot girl with no personality and no compatibility.

 

[lamath]

As other posters suggest, all you have is a catch-22 that won't make sense because if you didn't have a scarcity problem then you wouldn't be having such an issue in the first place. There are other aspects, which depend on how you are wired, how much charisma (which could be silent) the personality of the girl has (i.e. a flat hot lady is different from a dynamic average lady because you may feel like you have a better chance and enjoy her company, compatibility (she likes what you enjoy enthusiastically, etc....)

The question is what is it about this girl that you feel you are liable to catch feelings? How is she appealing to you as a person that you want a soul-connection with her and feel like you can share you life with her? You don't catch feelings for a boring hot girl with no personality and no compatibility.

The projection of mostly false attributes and the unrealistic idealisation of a future with said a women is also a factor.

Imo this is also why women love mysterious man, because what you imagine is always better than reality

 

[Scars]

I can't believe no one has said it yet.. spin more plates OP.

 

[backseatjuan]

Realize you have a dck.

 

[RangerMIke]

I honestly do not understand why men have a problem with controlling emotions. It's not like I don't have them, but I've always been in complete control. If I do not want to fall for a chick, I don't. I just don't... I can not tell you how I do this... but I will say that the more you actually think about anything to more attached you become to it. It is true with anything I suppose, and it does work with women. If you get to the point where you are thinking too much about any particular women, just fvcking stop thinking about her. You really don't have to think about other women, or dating multiple women (though that does work) I don't think 'spinning plates' is really the reason, it's just that when you are dating multiple women, you aren't spending too much time thinking about any one of them.

This works with everything not just chicks... if something is stressing you out, just stop thinking about it.... change the subject... think about something else... occupy your mind with some tactile task that requires some concentration.

Control where your mind goes and your body and emotions will follow.

 

[EyeOnThePrize]

When you truly understand female nature it is actually quite hard to have any feelings for them at all

This is toxic thinking and I can't respect it or the people that like it.

How would one keep oneself from cathing feelings when dealing with girls? From my own experience my frame goes ot ****ters as soon as I start cathing feelings while I start rationalizing bad behaviour later on. So how does one avoid catching feelings and stay cold hearted?

It sounds like you're afraid of your feelings and/or your inability to control them. If you'd rather neglect that obvious problem and go for women anyway then go for women you feel nothing for and run when feelings develop, simple.

Your sub conscious seems to be drawing you to feelings. What do you think it's telling you?

Understand that truly mastering your feelings is how you can really connect with a woman and bring out the creative nature in her and yourself. When you maintain complete awareness of your uninhibited feelings it's euphoric and it'll surpass your wildest imagination.

Women can see it on you, they can sense it in your presence, the unshakeable confidence you ooze in your behavior that telegraphs deep emotional awareness/mastery and the vision you're manifesting. As a result they ruin their panties and can't help but melt in your arms.

Don't fear catching feelings, learn to own them, to master them, unapologetically. Look deep within, to your very core, and own every thought as uniquely yours. Magnify that uniqueness, there's no one else like you, let the world and women know.

 

[LuksSkywalker]

Man is trully honest after he jerks off. Empty your ballsack and you'll know if you have feelings for someone right away

 

[StacksHitEmUp]

You don't. You suck it up and stay acting like a man. Don't let the feelings control you, acknowledge them but stay cool, collected & confident and always go after what you want.

 

[Dash Riprock]

Saying "don't catch feelings" for a hot, quality female is like saying stand next to a bon fire but don't feel the heat.

If you're human, you will have stronger feelings for certain people no matter how hard you try to fight it. F*uck, even dogs show affection to their owners.

It's OK to have feelings provided you can control your actions. 95% of the time, when a man has strong feelings for a woman, he'll go all beta retard and start coming off as weak, supplicating, soft, etc., which may be "cute" to her at first but if it's ongoing it will turn off a woman more than anything a man could possibly do.

So if you find yourself having strong feelings for a female, great, just remember the Laws of Attraction, DJ Principles, and what turns on a female and what turns them off, and you'll be fine. This mainly comes with lots and lots of practice, so be patient and don't beat yourself up if you do mess up.

But saying, "just don't feel" is humanly impossible. Emotion is the fuel of life. But use it to your advantage, not to your detriment.

 

[Lynx nkaf]

Man is trully honest after he jerks off. Empty your ballsack and you'll know if you have feelings for someone right away

post --- clarity

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Multiple plates prevents feelings.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Multiple plates prevents feelings.

That's how your wife or gf forgets about you when she starts cheating.

 

[wifehunter]

"How to keep oneself from catching feelings?"

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