Word to the wise... If you don't close (sex) on the first date, don't bother looking for a second.

[Robert28]

It sounds like classic low interest. Maybe nothing you even did wrong. One of those "just is" things.

The best hitters in baseball bat .300. It's a hard sport. So is finding a hot, interested, non-crazy chick that is into sex.

Don't let it get you down and keep swinging. Strikeouts are part of the game, even for Trout, Yelich, and Bellinger, if you know/like MLB.

Says more about the girl to have low interest and yet let the guy be all over her tits.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I’ve had several LTRs that gave it up easy, and ended up being terrific. I don’t think you can evaluate based on how fast they have sex because I’ve had head cases that insisted I wait.



I despise waiting for sex. If you aren’t a virgin what am I waiting for?

To

True but he said he was at her place. He could always whip out a consent form and tell her to sign so we can get down to business.lol

Sad it's come to that. May as well be in porn.

 

[GoodOne123]

Here's what I've experienced.

The girls who give it up on the first date generally fall into 2 categories:

One is the girl who bangs a lot of guys on the first date and has low self esteem. The second is the girl who only sleeps with guys on the first date she has a genuine connection and attraction to. The second category are perfectly good women and suitable for an LTR.

The girls who make you wait for sex fall into 2 categories:

The first category is being manipulative and controlling, they may never sleep with you and just string you along for your attention. The second category are women who are genuinely prudish and need to get to know a guy before sleeping with them. Second category perfectly suitable for an LTR, however in this day and age they are RARE.

 

[bcude]

I've found after decades of dating experience, pre-OLD and post-OLD, two things I'm 100% certain about:

1- Any woman that f*ucks on the first date is NOT a good choice for a LTR or gf and certainly not marriage. Sure they are fun, sexy, adventurous in bed, etc, etc. They were just way more f*ucked up and were a drama magnet. Now, I do f*uck a lot of these girls, especially the past 4 years, but I would never "date" one. They're good for booty calls and when I'm horny--that's it.

2- The women who weren't so open with their p*ussy, went on to be MUCH BETTER choices for gf's and LTRs. Not even close. They had a better moral compass and had their s*hit together in their life; school, $, job, friends, family, whatever.

You guys who live by the credo of f*uck her on the first or maybe even second date or dump her are sticking yourself with trashy *****s and sluts and low-quality women and then posting on SS about how she went bat s*hit crazy, dumped you, cheated on you, bla bla. Had you paid attention to the flags upfront, and they're always there, you would have avoided all the drama.

My experience now and going back to the 80's. Take it for what it's worth.

Ciao.

Analyzing my past and honestly this is exactly my experience too, couldn't have said it any better.

 

[Robert28]

To
Sad it's come to that. May as well be in porn.

The problem is porn sets the standards not the women. Won’t do this or that? That’s fine, you’re fired and the girl behind you will gladly do it.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

The problem is porn sets the standards not the women. Won’t do this or that? That’s fine, you’re fired and the girl behind you will gladly do it.

I don't know all the standards in there. But if you are on tape fvcking a woman in a porn scene, it is highly unprobably you will be accused of a "rape" or a "me too".

 

[teacha]

I've found after decades of dating experience, pre-OLD and post-OLD, two things I'm 100% certain about:

1- Any woman that f*ucks on the first date is NOT a good choice for a LTR or gf and certainly not marriage. Sure they are fun, sexy, adventurous in bed, etc, etc. They were just way more f*ucked up and were a drama magnet. Now, I do f*uck a lot of these girls, especially the past 4 years, but I would never "date" one. They're good for booty calls and when I'm horny--that's it.

2- The women who weren't so open with their p*ussy, went on to be MUCH BETTER choices for gf's and LTRs. Not even close. They had a better moral compass and had their s*hit together in their life; school, $, job, friends, family, whatever.

You guys who live by the credo of f*uck her on the first or maybe even second date or dump her are sticking yourself with trashy *****s and sluts and low-quality women and then posting on SS about how she went bat s*hit crazy, dumped you, cheated on you, bla bla. Had you paid attention to the flags upfront, and they're always there, you would have avoided all the drama.

My experience now and going back to the 80's. Take it for what it's worth.

Ciao.

Basically, what you are saying here is:

treat women that have high interest in you as fukk buddies and marry the ones that show low interest.

Am I wrong?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Whats the difference? Can you tell us whats the difference between her wanting to fck you now? Or then? Or when?
Behind the podium? After dinner? After shes seen your long term?? LOL

Shes IN or NOT. Yea or nea. The rest of it is for clowns

Well maybe if all you want is to continuously bang random chicks to make you feel better about yourself then there isn't. But coming from someone with NPD that doesn't surprise me.

 

[teacha]

OP you are way too outcome dependant. Just focus on having fun and let the chips fall where they may.

 

[BadBoy89]

My point is it's disturbing that the date went as well as it did, then when I hit her up to chill a couple days later she gives a seemingly disinterested/cold response with no reciprocation. And this situation isn't a rare occurrence either.

This is why men should spin plates.

When men spin plates, any bad behaviour on the woman’s part is neutralized. If a woman knows you are getting sex from a younger, hotter women, her behaviour will likely change for the better and she will treat the man right.

Yet when men take cues from society and become desperate to be locked down in a relationship, they become weak and dependent. They put up with bad, rude, abusive behaviour from women because they have no alternative, they are not spinning plates.

In North America, women have be able to change the laws to give themselves Power. Men can offset this power by spinning plates.

Come on men.

 

[EyeBRollin]

This OP is 100% incorrect.

 

[RickTheToad]

This is dating these days. Why? Because women have too many options.

Had a date Friday night. Was pretty exhausted but sucked it up and went anyways. Had a couple drinks and it wasn't a bad time, but also wanted to leave so I could go home and go to bed. Got the check and asked her where she parked so I could walk her there, go for the goodnight kiss and call it a night. She tells me she Uber'd, so I offer her a ride home since she lives a mile from me. At first she says no, then a minute later is fine with it. Odd, but ok. Get to her place just expecting to go for a goodnight kiss and say peace, but she invites me in. Start making out on her couch and say we should go to her bedroom. She says no, then a couple minutes later agrees to it because the dogs she's watching are all over us being annoying as hell. Long story short, made out, felt each other up and sucked on her tits. Wouldn't let me take her pants off and I didn't feel like playing the "let's see how many tries it takes before she let's me put my hand down her pants" game all night when I was exhausted--just figured we'd have sex on the second date.

Texted her yesterday (sunday)--striking the iron while it's hot--saying we should pop open a bottle of wine at my place...

(hours later) Her: I'm sorry I'm just seeing this! I've been running around all day with friends. Let me get back to you in a bit

Me: ok

(Two hours later) Her: Sorry it's so late but tonight's not going to work for me

Me: all good. Have a good night

Nothing after that. And she's off today, so she didn't have to wake up early or anything as far as I know. Cold response, no reciprocation--GG.

Every lady is a slut... You just didn't catch her on the right day.

 

[RickTheToad]

Some guys have body cams, car cams and cams in their premises

Doesn't matter. Yea, it will get you out of any rape charge, but you may be placed under arrest temporarily, have to defend yourself, get a lawyer, be in the news. Then you have to check if you can legally record the other person through audio only, video and audio, or just video only. Depends on each State's wire tapping laws. Heaven help you if she's found out to be under 18 and you video taped. Then you have a Statutory rape charge due to the recording.

Sex was less risky (non-STD wise) before the digital generation.

 

[jnMissouri]

not skanky, is more like you failed her little test, she play resistance, then a min or 2 later she comply, she was willing, but since he didn't close she will let him jump more hops now to go again.

I agree with this (have not read the rest of the thread yet though). I had a few cases where we are back at her place, in one case it was a hotel the girl had gotten, on another it was one that I had gotten because we met online and she lived on the other side of the state. First few attempts at a kiss ended with a turned cheek. But I figured, she invited me to her hotel at the end of the date (she lived far away and got a hotel for us for the night) why would she not be into this. I tried a few more times and eventually we kissed and had sex. Same with the one that came from hours away to see me. She knew we were spending the weekend in a hotel together on the water. I figured it was a test or she was just not ready yet. Ended up banging her all weekend and then every other weekend for a few months in a tent while camping lol.

One of my ex's was also like this. Deeeeply religious. No kissing first date. We did eventually on the first date after I pulled away to take her home from my apartment at the time. She then wouldn't talk to me for a couple weeks. Turns out she was afraid of how far she'd go with me considering she kissed me on our first date, she was trying to wait until marriage (this girl was a 9+). Long story short, a few months later, we started sleeping together. Sometimes she felt guilty especially initially, but other times she'd lead ME to the bedroom when we started kissing....I even got it on video busting a nut in her mouth one of the times.

I think in this case you failed her test OP. She invited you in FOR SEX. She wanted sex. You just needed to keep trying and to get her hot enough to do it. It's her ASD (anti slut defense).

 

[jnMissouri]

I strongly disagree with this.

I disagree with this too. My longest gf was 9 years and she was a phenomenal gf. Always put me first (unfortunately I didn't put her first..). She slept with me our first date and stayed the night for a few more rounds. I've had more issues with girls that wanted me to wait, who ended up being nut jobs.

 

[RickTheToad]

I disagree with this too. My longest gf was 9 years and she was a phenomenal gf. Always put me first (unfortunately I didn't put her first..). She slept with me our first date and stayed the night for a few more rounds. I've had more issues with girls that wanted me to wait, who ended up being nut jobs.

You do not put the lady first, you are first, she is second. You lead, she follows. That's how it works. She prob. f ucked something up with you and you bounced. Good for you dude.

 

[jnMissouri]

You do not put the lady first, you are first, she is second. You lead, she follows. That's how it works. She prob. f ucked something up with you and you bounced. Good for you dude.

Well I ended it because I was having multiple affairs. She still wouldn't move out...until she found one of the other girls numbers on a piece of paper and called her....Now looking back at it I realize I had a great life partner.

 

[Dash Riprock]

Basically, what you are saying here is:

treat women that have high interest in you as fukk buddies and marry the ones that show low interest.

Am I wrong?

No. That's not what I'm saying at all.

 

[RickTheToad]

Well I ended it because I was having multiple affairs. She still wouldn't move out...until she found one of the other girls numbers on a piece of paper and called her....Now looking back at it I realize I had a great life partner.

Well, I guess that's a bit different then. Hopefully, you've learned your lesson. Our failures and f uckups can be our greatest teachers; if we learn from them.

 

[EyeOnThePrize]

One is the girl who bangs a lot of guys on the first date and has low self esteem. The second is the girl who only sleeps with guys on the first date she has a genuine connection and attraction to. The second category are perfectly good women and suitable for an LTR.

it's funny but i always thought girls were pretending not to be sluts because they were bigger sluts than you could imagine, it turned out to be true ha. the girls that pretend the best are the ones that have the most experience, and are super freaky...

OP you're putting too much pressure on yourself to close. she was clearly wanting some sexual tension and you didn't provide it. she wanted to play back and forth with you and get all worked up before jumping to penetration. that's the mark of someone that's experienced in bed. she wants to be wet and enjoy herself with you, indulge her!

you need to relax and enjoy yourself. stop taking things personally. you know what i do in those situations? i just put her hand on my crotch and start unbuttoning my pants or grabbing all over her while i kiss her or lick/bite her neck. if you're not enjoying the foreplay then why are you wasting your time?